How to Raise Your Sons and Daughters

Author, John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Published by John S Lee

Resume, John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP.

• Born in Anmyeon-do, Taean-gun, Chungnam, Korea
• Graduated from Yonsei University College of Medicine
• Susan Muuichon medical Service and served as a Korean military doctor
• Pediatric Resident Training at UCONN Medical School, Connecticut, USA and  Yale University School of Medicine
• American board-certified pediatrician and Korean board-certified pediatrician
• Medical License, for New York State, North Carolina State, Connecticut State, Korean
• John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP, Pediatric Practice for 32 years, Willimantic, Conn, USA
• Home Pediatric medical carea  Encyclopedia-Bumodo-ban-eusaga-deeja-handa, Raise you Sons and Daughters teenagers wth unconditional love, and Hunmnity education such as .Parents should also become at least a half doctor, Growth and development and parenting , pediatric and adolescent epilepsy + 100 epilepsy question and answer,www.koreapediatrics.com (2001-present), www.doctorleeflowerphoto.com .and more
• Clinical Assistant Professor, Pediatrics, UCONN Medical School, Connecticut, USA
• Connecticut Korean Society Association, Chairmpers0n

 

Preface…………………………………………………8

It is an honor to present ” How to raise Your Sons and Daughters ” to the people of all over world,  especially 80 million Koreans in my mother country South Korea and North Korea.

 Foods, shelter, clothes, health and love are the most basic human necessity for the children as well as adults.

 And Also they should have healthy, happy, and productive life  with healthy self-esteem.

My wife and I raised our two sons and one daughter without the fudmental parenting knowlege such as unconditional love and training children with love and so on. I hve been practicing in pediatrics for nearly 43 years at Wllimantic, Connecticut ,USA.

This book will give how to do for parenting on health, symptoms signs, diagnosis, treatment, prevention of disease and safty accident, love, sleep, cognitive education, virtue education for children and adolescents (0-18 years old).

This  book also is for child rearing guidelines that is easy to understand and practical, and is compiled based on the latest data based on information obtained from the sources such as from various pediatric science textbooks, journals,  training and education and the experience for 57 years medical professional career.

.”How to raise your sons and daughters” means how to love and raise your children and adolescents, how to get enough sleep, how to get the highest level of mental health, cognitive education, how to cultivate physical education, and how to become a productive member with a healthy self-esteem and pride as a member in this society.

How can parentss love their children while they are growing up and developing into adulthoods, how can children and parents communicate well, how to express anger properly, how to relieve stress, how to prevent teenagers to run away from, bullying, teenage pregnancy, theft, lies, child-raising information, such as child abuse, is also provided here.

If you read this book “How to Raise  your sons and daughters and use this book as information  for raising children. It will give you the ideal directions for raising children and give you  what was wrong and what was right  parenting. This book will serve as a shinning light so that parents can be extremely rewarded with what they did well while raising children and young children, and that wrong parenting practices can be corrected.

“How to raise your sons and doughters”help you how to raise your children into healthy and productive children with healthy self-esteem, how to love and raise your children, how to make sure that they have enough rest and sleep, how to keep your family stable while mom and dad are married smoothly and How to make unconditional love, how to convey the love of parents’ children, unconditional love, how to communicate between parents and children, how to build a happy family. It tells about children’s natural personality and nature. It also provides information on normal sleep patterns in children and adolescents, abnormal sleep problems and their solutions, physical ailments such as colds, bronchial asthma and allergic rhinitis that are common among children and adolescents, and mental health problems.

The information on parenting int this book would be verygood for parents, doctors, as well as grandparents, elementary, middle and high school teachers, medical students, nurses, students and children and adolescents , all men and women . If possible, it would be good to read it once from start to finish on a regular basis, and then read the necessary information as needed to solve problems such as loving children.

However, this book is not a substitute for your doctors.

 In addition, some of the contents of this book may be duplicated with the contents of other volumes for convenience. I hope you can recommend this book to your friends.

 In the future, This book should be improved. I wish your generous heart to achieve that purpose.

 Thank you to everyone who became the model of the photos and to all of you who participated in “Ask and qwestion on the Internet for Children and Youth”.

Special thanks to publisher for creating this book

You may get more information from other pediatric health care including Google, www.patiented.aap.org, and WebMD.com. and  you can get more information on reference www.drleepediatrics.com,  especially chapter 22.

I believe it will help a lot. Thank you.

12, 2020

American Academy Board Certified Pediatrician and  Korean Academyof Pediatric Board Certified

Lee John Sang-won, MD., FAAP

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dedication

 

Thank to my  parents.

 

Special thanks to the pharmacist Lee Chunja, my beloved wife, who has typed and corrected and arranged so many manuscripts all year round for decades.

 

With the patience, courage, and cooperation of son Dong-hyeong, Gun-hyeong, daughter Jini’s proud and son-in-law, and grandson Jabin, Violet, Kai, we all have brought this book to this world. Thank you

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Contents

Resume…………………………………………………………………………………………….1

Preface……………………………………………………………………………………………  8

Dedication……………………………………………………………………………………………….10

1.    Love your sons and daughters unconditionally really……………………………..11

2.    How to really love our children unconditionally………………………………………17

3. What is love?……………………………………………………………………….……  .  28

4. How to give unconditionally, really love to your children…………………….….52

5. Love your children unconditionally really……………………………………………

6. The degree to which children are happy and stable depends on how happy

     and stable the marriage of the mother and father is. Marital happiness

    of parents positively influence  their children’s happiness………………………..33

7. Nine kind of Innate temperaments ……………………………………….

8. 25 percentile personality and 75 percentile personality …………………38

9. 9. Children should not be raised with harmful and wrong love. ………………………..57
10. 10. How to give unconditional and real love to your child…………………………….59
11. 11. Raise your children with eye contact love, physical contact love,  focused  

     attention love and  care10. ……………………………………………………………..61

12 USA Senator Paul Tongas’s love for children through ……………………………….67    

11. Children are the first priority in the priority of parent life………………………52
12. Train your children with love………………………………………………………..53
13. Depending on the quality of the parent’s marital relationship,

    and  Children’s happiness

14. Inherent different temperaments……………………………………………………….47
15. 25 percentile personality and 75 percentile personality ………………………………51
16. Parenting with unconditional love and care for your child…………………….90
17. Eye contact love for your child…………………………………………………………104
18. Physical contact love for your child…………………………………………………..131
19. Focused attention love and care for your children…………………………… 132
20. The first priority of your life is for your children……………………………..
21. Mom and Dad, do you love me? …………………………………………………….
22. 2 Wrong love for your child- Possessive love, Vicarious love, Seductive love,

    Role reversal love…………………………………………………………………………

23. Honorable Senator Paul Tsongus’s love for children …………………..
24. Training your child with love………………………………..see 13
25. Communication between you and your children………………71
26. Punishment or corporal punishment in-home or school..156
27. Help your children to develop healthy self-esteem……….165
28. Sex education for your children and adolescents….146
29. Happy parental marital life and happy children
30. Communication of a couple and to my dear husband ..176
31. Hugging……181
32. boys are urgently neede…………………………………..
33. these girls are urgently needed.
34. The short course in human relationship…………………………………….192
35. what doesyouth meanand What does Chung-So-Nyon?……………………..192
36. Teeen runaways……………………………………………………………………201
37. Adolescent prostitutes……………………………………………………………204
38. 29. Teenage pregnancy……………………………………………………………204
39. 3 Masturbation………………………………………………………………….214
40. 30. Depression in children and adolescent (1)……………………………….222
41. 31. Depression in adolescent children (2)………………………………….
42. 32. Stress………………………………………………………………………………236
43. 33. Smoking prevention…………………………………………………………..263
44. 35. Sopa, Bang Jung Hwan’s “Declaration of Children’s Right”………….
45. 36. Bullying, school violence, cyberbullying, teasing……………………….255
46. 37. Train your children not to lies………………………………………………263
47. 3 Truth and falsehood……………………………………………………….263
48. 3 Feeling guilty, Jealous, Manipulation, Bullying………………………286
49. 4 Stealing in children and adolescents(1)………………………………..289
50. 4 Stealing in children and adolescents(2)…. 298
51. 4 Pardon, forgiveness…………………………………………………………..310

. Television and vision

. Bedroom television and adolescents

. Marijuana

43. 43. Principles of confidential care for patients………………………………………317
44. 44. Praise and jealousy….309
45. 45. Study on Korean-American children-adolescents raising of

    Korean Americans…………………………………………………………………….318

Principles of Pediatrician’s confidentiality in American Academy of Pediatrics

. Principles of physician’s confidentiality

46. 46. Watching the dying child…………………………………………………………..345
47. 47. One hundred Qs & As on common cold ……………………………….346
48. Should all children drink cow’s milk every day? …………………….
49. Hundreds of questions and hundreds of answers on asthma……..371
50. 50. One hundred Qs & As on allergy rhinitis…………………………..401

. 100 questions and 100 answers on influenza and flu vaccination

. Snoring Snoring

. Hiccup Hiccup

. Toddler Infant keeps hugging other children.

51. 51. Older brothers or sisters’ jealousy towards to newborn siblings…410

.     My 43-month-old daughter has been crying for the whole day because

.     S he doesn’t want to go to school

.     Jealousy, love, constipation, cow milk intake…..417, 413

.     Thank you for your answers for my answers on your child’s crying all day long.

.     The child puts his hand in his mouth. 79.     

.     To travel by airplane with your baby

53. 53.How to choose medicine for treatments………………………………………

.     Big gift

54. 54.Happiness isn’t about money, it’s what makes it come to me ….436

.     You don’t have to pursue happiness. Make it come to you

.   Train your child not to lie.

86. humanity education…………………………………………470

 

1. Nowadays adolescents and Parenting

Photo 1. The love of parents between children is eternal love made up of love-bonding.

At Buyeo Public Park, Korea (Sculptor Unknown).

Copyright ⓒ 2020 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

The situation of adolescents in recent years has been not too bad in many ways compared to the past few decades ago, but in general, there are worse and too bad for some.

Alcohol drinking, smoking, habitual substance abuse, criminal behavior, violent behavior, bullying, teasing, decreased academic achievement, adolescent runaway, sexual values ​​denial, teenage pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, selfishness, economic dependence on parents, depression, suicide and other problems of adolescents continue to grow.

Outright rebellion against the guidance and training of parents and authorities are prevailing.

Many adolescents are helpless and apathetic.

Some of the adolescents express their anger through destructive behavior through passive-aggressive behavior.

At school, violence and bullying express their anger in their lives.

They destroy themselves, destroy and disrupt homes, schools and society.

Most adolescents don’t know how to properly express their anger.

Unfortunately, some of the parents do not teach their children how to properly express their anger while their children are growing up, neither in school nor in-home for growing children.

Neither many parents nor teachers, nor the leaders of members of society know how to properly express anger.

Also, even adolescents nowhere learn how to properly express their anger.

Perhaps that is why the most adolescents express their anger through “passive-aggressive behavior,” which is the worst way to express anger.

Most of the passive-aggressive behavior is destructive, antisocial, illegal and self-destructive.

The results are disastrous.

Suicide is a type of passive-aggressive behavior that is one of the typical ways to express anger.

Bullying, commonly seen at home, at work, and at school, is also a kind of passive-aggressive behavior that arises from expressing anger.

These problems can be seen in not only the adolescents themself, but in also their parents, family, school, society, and the country.

Why?

It is difficult to pinpoint the cause of the problem related to adolescent children.

The causes of their problems and the limits of responsibility are in the adolescent children themselves, but also with their parents, teachers, society, and the country.

The causes of some problems related to adolescent children could be simple, but many are complex.

The problems of adolescent children can be originated from the adolescent children themselves, their natural personality, and the interests of their family, parents, society, and the country.

The problems of the adolescent can be caused by the adolescent child’s own fault, or their mental and physical illness, the wrong parenting and education by his parents, and also sometimes both the adolescent child himself and his parents may be in trouble at fault.

The quality of life of some adolescent children can be influenced by their innate temperament,

and how happy the marriage of their parents is, and how smooth and stable they are.

Also it is affected by the method of raising children, raising and training children, a social state in which adolescent children live

It is affected by the mental, emotional, and economic status of the country’s older generation.

Today, adolescent children live in a cyber world.

Some of them just take a lot of information at face value in newspapers, magazines, TV, Internet, video, iPhone, iPod, Apple TV, iTunes, whether harmful or harmless, profitable or not, including information about promiscuous sex, teenage violence, binge drinking, substance abuse, suicide, house intrusion, rebellion against the authority, rebellion against parents, golden universalism, material civilization prevails, mysm (a doctrine that individual self-interest only), anti-ethical behaviors and impulses that adolescent do not care of he even parents, siblings, and neighbors, malicious propaganda and/or intrigue intentional lies, and It is exposed relentlessly to the hate.

They act and speak without changing their faces as they see, hear, and learn.

They are easily dazzled by negative and anti-humanistic information.

In addition, the marriage of their parents is neither happy nor smooth in the many cases.

In general, their parents may have many problems such as financial problems, divorce, or living separated.

Either one of the parents has died. Or for some reason, some adolescents grow up under a single house head.

Most adolescent children do not feel they are raised with full genius unconditional love from their parents.

In addition, nowadays they are difficult to find spiritual leaders who will lead the way.

These days, the US divorce rate is over 40% and Korea is said to do more than that.

As a result, the sweet home, shelter, and basic foundation of life for our children and adolescents, especially adolescents, are being shaken.

Some parents spend time with ludicrously expensive food, drinking, dancing at various gatherings such as wedding banquets, party gatherings, and classmates’ gatherings, and many children and young children are at home by themselves alone. Often, adolescent children spend time by themselves without parents, or adult protectors, or leaders.

For one reason or another, in particular, the foundations of the lives of some adolescent children are in a state of instability and even running into a state of destruction.

Nowadays, there is a saying that “children’s college entrance divorce”.

Children are absolutely in need of their parents’ mental, emotional and even spiritual support and help, guidance, and love until they fully grown up in this world to form a happy family independent from their parents, and sometimes even after that.

After young adult children who have graduated from high school and then entered college, they also want to continue to receive support from their parents and genuine unconditional love. They absolutely need more than ever to have parents who, even independent young adults, can constantly care for, guide, and train them.

Also, some of them hope to get financial help from their parents as well.

Most of the young adult children want to enjoy the most stable mental, emotional, and spiritual life.

In order to achieve that goal, parental advice and guidance are needed not only during adolescence but also in young adulthood after puberty.

It is extremely desirable that these young adult children often return to their parents for emotional help.

Photo 3-213. Children who have grown up with full unconditional true love do their best to love themselves, to love others, and whatever they do. Even from childhood to adulthood, they live with healthy self-esteem and sound pride and confidence. Copyright ⓒ 2020 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Parents should be on standby so that these young adult children can come to their parents at any time without hesitation when they need emotional, sometimes mental, or financial assistance. Nevertheless, some parents made “divorce at the time of their children’s college entrance .”

In addition, the world today is highly mechanized and a nuclear family.

There are also problems in setting the direction of home education and children rearing.

Economic problems that occur in most families can lead to problems for adolescent children.

Parents’ prevalence of selfishness, lack of values ​​of ethics and morality, wrong child love and training methods, and lack of dialogue between parents and children can be the root causes of adolescent problems.

Of course, later on, the mental and physical problems of adolescent children can be the cause of their problems during adolescence.

Some parents nurture their children and adolescents with possessive love like things they own.

They are also sexually impulsive to their children and nurture them through seductive love.

To accomplish their dreams which could not be achieved in parents past life, some parents nurture their children with vicarious love, tempting them so that they can fulfill their dreams.

Some adolescents don’t know what modesty, humility, frugality, humility, politeness, and greetings are.

Even in interpersonal relationships, it is easy to live a miserable social life because it is only at that time and they do not know anything related to future relationships.

Among the causes of various problems in adolescent children described above, the main cause of adolescent’s problem nowadays is family breakdown, and the failure to give true love and raise children without unconditional real love.

While we all live in this world, we often say “I love my children, I love my children,” and in fact, most of parents don’t know what love really means.

I sometimes have held seminars on the subject of “love for children.”

A wise woman asked me, “Where are parents who don’t know how to love their children?”

There are too many parents who raise their children without studying on the love of children and not knowing what love of children is.

It is known that by sending the just–deliver- the baby-mother to postpartum care centers, San-hu-choriwon in stead to send to their sweet home. It is known that parent is sending their children to daycare centers, nursery schools, kindergartens, schools, and academies and children learn the basics of humanity, the intellectual character are the best for children welfare.

Many parents do not know how to love their children in any way. Most of the parents do not know how to convey their love to their children through eye contact love, physical contact love, focus attention love, and care. There are many teachers and parents who argue that their children should be trained with corporal punishment rather than with love.

During a seminar on the love of children, some parents asked me, “Where are the parents who do not know how to raise and love their children?”

We must always be in a learning attitude.

The author was also one of the parents who raised three children without knowing how to properly love my children.

I raised three children without knowing what is unconditional love, true love or possessive love, and so on.

The Boy with his mother at High School graduation

During 18 years of my elementary, middle, and high school education, no one taught me what love is and how to express anger. So I couldn’t learn.

I have tried to provide food, shelter, and clothes to my children from birth from pregnancy, labor, and childbirth, treat diseases well, provide adequate vaccination to prevent infectious diseases, prevent safety accidents, and buy toys. Satisfying and nurturing children by giving them enough pocket money, helping them grow up with joy and enjoyment, eating well-balanced foods, providing adequate clothing and shelter, providing good school education, and taking extracurricular activities as needed. Most parents know that these are all about loving their children.This makes sense.

It is the love of parents to raise their children by satisfying the health, food, clothes and comfortable shelter.

However, one of the essentials is missing above.

To  give  genuine real unconditional love to children with  listed above is not enough.

There’s one more thing to do besides what’s missing there.

It is true love without conditions.

True love without conditions.

2.  How to really love your children unconditionally ……..14

 

Photo 34. Eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love and care, and training with love give children plenty of true unconditional love and fill their love(emotional) tank.

And then they will be happy and do their best, no matter what they do. They will have healthy self-esteem and pride.

If children who are so much loved and raised, they will not be suffering from depression. And they know how to love themselves and also how to love others.

If  you have only one choice from following two questions,  which one  would you choose,  a child who is so happy or  a thousand-pound gold?

Love your children a lot and raise children with unconditional love.  Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

When the children do wrong, many people think that their wrong behavior is due to the wrong parenting and not good training methods by their parents. That makes sense too.

Whether other people blame their parents for misreading and their children do it wrong, or school officials and educators have misled their education and then pass responsibility to schools or teachers for their children misbehaving.

It makes sense to pass the blame on parents and educators for misbehaving children because educators may miseducate them and parents may control them incorrectly.

Of course, parents, school officials, and educators may be responsible to some extent, but most of the causes of problems in adolescent children may also lie in the adolescent children themselves.

Problems related to innate temperament often arise in adolescent children.

Therefore, the cause of the wrongdoing of adolescent children cannot be entirely passed on to the faults of their parents, their school authorities or educators, or the state or society.

Depending on their natural innate temperament, some preadolescent children and adolescent children are easier to handle and easier to raise, while others are difficult to handle and difficult to nurture. There are also adolescent children that are easy to train and other adolescent children that are difficult to train.

There are pre-adolescent children or adolescents who have loved more because of their innate temperament, some adolescent children, and some pre-adolescent children who are loved less because of their innate temperament .

For teachers and parents to train adolescent children well, parents especially need to be aware of each child’s natural innate temperament. It is very important to take into account his natural innate temperament and raise children according to that natural innate temperament.

Through Spartan education, Spartan training method, Jewish parenting, and training method, American parenting and training method, Han Seok-bong’s mother’s parenting method, Mencius’s mother or Yulgok’s mother’s parenting and training method, you cannot raise children, and you cannot train your children uniformly.

These days are the age of IT information cyber.

Children born to the same parents cannot be raised and trained uniformly in the same way because many reasons.

While raising children, you can compare and raise each child, but you shouldn’t train them with the same way.

There is one more things that must be pointed out here.

Parents’ love should also be unconditional love, no matter what.

Unconditional love is one kind of ideal love, and unconditional love cannot be all the time 100% complete.

However, the more a couple makes love that is close to 100% unconditional love, the smoother the marital relationship will be, and the more stable, smooth, and happy marital life will be.

Children who are raised by their mothers and fathers who live a smooth and stable marital life will also be mentally stable, peaceful, and happy.

The life of a married couple who love conditionally and do not truly love each other and is not smooth and stable in marital relationships, and then their children will not be stable. Children can not grow up safely and happily if an unstable parental marriage.

Parents must have a smooth and stable marriage so that their children can be happy.

The stability of the parents’ marriage determines how happy their children are. Of course, there are exceptions, but what can determine the success or failure of children depends a lot on how stable their parental marriage life is.

Parents are directly and indirectly responsible for every type of behavior in children and adolescents on a daily basis.

Therefore, parenting is quite difficult. However, anyone can be a good parent if they try.

It is very important for parents to have the confidence to raise their children to live happily and sincerely without conditional love.

Their parents do not have unconditional true love with each other and have a lot of conflict between couples for various reasons. Their children do not feel happy and are difficult to act the best, and they can not their best no matter what they do.

The marital relationship should be based on unconditional love and an amicable marital relationship should be established.

They have to truly do unconditional love.

The life of parents also should be an example for their children. Parents should truly love their children unconditionally in any case.

As already explained, true real love for a child whether he or she is disabled or not, ugly or handsome, with or without strengths, with or without disadvantages, behaves well or not, is called unconditional love for children.

Whether she or he  is an adopted child or a stepchild, you must truly love and raise them with unconditional love.

Unconditional love does not mean that parents like and accept their children’s wrong actions or words unconditionally.

“Love is a word or action or a warm heart that cares for herself or himself and cares for the other person.”

Therefore, if parents love their children, parents should not accept wrong behaviors and wrong actions or wrong words unconditionally.

If children’s behavior or adolescent’s bad behavior is ignored, some children cannot discern whether their behavior is right or wrong, they can continue to do such wrong behavior because they cannot discern what is right and what is wrong, and how to behave correctly. They can’t learn how, and they can repeat wrong actions again.

Parents should give really love to their children and they should not neglect them to prevent repeat bad actions or bad words.

If you fulfill your parenting duties, and rights as parents, nurture them by setting an example, and sincerely love for your children without the condition, they will gradually one by one, abandon childish behavior in maturity and will act maturely.

Like many parents, if they love their children only when they please their parents, children cannot truly feel that they are receiving unconditional love from their parents.

They don’t know much because they’re young and can’t make good judgments.

Adolescent children also belong to the growing immature children, and all children are children to be grown, so they play like the children and act like children grown.

In this world, there are no perfect children, no perfect adults, no perfect parents.

Moreover, growing-up children are not perfect.

Children and adolescents cannot always behave to satisfy their parents as they wish.

Growing up without unconditional and genuine love given by their parents will damage their image and will not be able to act more maturely.

If parents love their children only when they satisfy their needs and expectations, their feelings and behavior will be impaired.

Nevertheless, there are so many children in this world who grew up to receive conditional love from their parents and to become adults.

It is common to see a lot of people who treat other people conditionally, and also parents, our family members, and even when their children grow up, they treat them conditionally.

Children who have been brought up with true unconditional love know how to love others, including their families, unconditionally from an early age, grow up physically, mentally, emotionally, and do their best in whatever they do. And they live with sound healthy self-esteem and pride.

Many parents are convinced that they love their children, but unfortunately, they love their children conditionally and really they do not really love them, but sometimes they do give possessive love, role-reversal love, and seduce love and also sometimes raise them with vicarious love to their children.

What’s even more frightening and sad is that parents love their children seductively. As a result, we can see the image of today’s children and adolescents reflected in the mirror in this society.

There are too many parents who truly love their children unconditionally, but do not know how to convey that love to them.

Perhaps I was one of those parents.

We have not learned how to truly love our children without condition in the Western way.

I saw young high school girls in Korea standing at Bongeunsa Temple on the 8th of April, 2012 when was the Sakyamuni’s birthday, saying they were giving free hugs.

They stood there saying they were giving free hugs to others, but they seemed to be standing there because they wanted to get free hugs.

Most parents love their children sincerely and unconditionally, but parents don’t know how to convey their unconditional love to their children.

In addition, there are many cases where it is difficult to convey the love of parents to their children and cannot be surely conveyed. Still, many parents are not trying to learn.

For that reason, children are unconditionally and genuinely loved by their parents, but their love for their children is not well transfered to them, so many children do not feel that they are receiving true and unconditional love from their parents.

This is the greatest misfortune among parents and children nowadays.

We hear and see a lot of examples like this wherever we live.

Even nowadays, many parents love and raise their children in a vague and natural way to raise their children.

Nowadays child sex education is being taught to do sexual life scientifically, our parents should do their best to love their children scientifically, reasonably and effectively.

And also nowadays, novice parents learn information about pregnancy, labor, delivery, and child-rearing through pregnancy and childbirth education classes, parental education courses, and reference books on raising various children and obtain them through the internet.

And learn more scientifically to convey true, unconditional love to them, and love them right.

If you search for Bible on the Internet Google search, “About 464,000,000 results (0.19 seconds) links were found to learn more scientifically to convey true, unconditional love to them, and love them right.

In order for parents to love their children scientifically, parents must specifically learn how to love their children through parental education or reference books.

In addition, you should learn many useful words to use when learning how to love your children effectively.

Recently, there is a term “skinship”in Korean. The meaning of the word “skinship” and the word “physical contact love” are very different.

Of course, I also became a doctor without learning what the meaning of love was. Then I married and raised two sons and one daughter.

Also, until I didn’t do this research, I vaguely knew the meaning of love and may be until now.

In addition, I have learned many words necessary for raising children these days, such as eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love and care, and unconditional love about what skinship is.

However, while majoring in pediatrics in the United States, I learned a lot from parents who brought their children to my peditric office or american nurses about these words necessary for raising children.

Fortunately, I read the books “How to Really Love Your Child” and “How to Really Love Your Teenager” written by Ross Campbell, MD about 25 years ago.

After that, “How to Really Love Your Teenager” by Ross Campbell, MD  published by Victor Publishing, and “Raise teenage sons and daughters was translated into Korean by me”and  It was published in Seomundang in 1980.

I confess here that I have learned a lot from that time to love my children more scientifically.

After that, I read “How to Really Love Your Child” written by Ross Campbell, MD and it was translated into Korean as“True Child Love” and learned a lot of the meanings of words about child love, such as eye contact love, physical contact love and unconditional love.

After that, when I was treating pediatric ptients in my pediatric office, and when I saw them in a hospital pediatric ward, I sometimes heard the nurses telling me, “That child doesn’t have eye contact.”

Also, a pediatric patient said, “I am not well hugged by my parents or my nurses.” In other words, I sometimes heard the words “That kid doesn’t do physical contact well.”

And I learned words about the love of children, such as eye contact love and physical contact love.

In the meantime, I have treated a lot of pediatric patients using the method of love for children that I have heard and learned while treating pediatric patients, and the method of love for my children learned in “How to Really Love Your Teenager” and “How to Really Love Your Child.”

I am convinced how scientific, practical, correct, and realistic how to love children described in the two books mentioned above, when carefully observing the actual scenes of parents’ love for their children while I was treating children at my office for past almost 40 years.

I raised a Sunizer dog (photo 3-214) called “Meggie”.

Photo 3-214. Meggie wanted to receive eye contact love, physical contact love, and focused attention love and care more than the human beings, as well as our families, and she also wanted to receive eye contact love, physical contact love, and focused attention love and care from both me and my wife and guests too. She did a lot of work and left this world. And she taught me a lot. Thank you, Meggi very much. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

I had seminars on “How to Love and Raise Children” in various places under the arrangement of a Korean Church in the United States and Mayor Cho Gyu-seon in Seosan City, Korea.

Unfortunately, a large number of people and a crowd (?) gathered in the sex education seminar for adults given by a nurse from Korea, but it seemed that many people did not attend to the seminar on “How to Raise and Love Children” given by me, and the seminar did not receive a good response.

So-called “intellectuals,” asked, “Is there a special need to learn how to love my children?” Some parents asked, “Why should I need to take a busy time to attend to kind of seminars?”

After that, unfortunately, the book “Raise your teenage sons and daughters” was not republished for various reasons after the initial first publication.

However, “How to Really Love Your Child” (published by the Navigator is still available now.

Subscribing to the English publication “How to Really Love Your Teenager” and “How to Really Love Your Child” will help you to raise your child.

For reference, I think it is an infinite honor to be able to write and post this kind of article by myself without looking at the manuscript or reference book.

There are many ways to love your children and how to convey your love to your children.

·         Eye contact love,

·         Physical contact love,

·         Focused attention love and care

·         And training with love.

·         True, unconditional love should be right so that parents’ love can be effectively communicated to their children.

For reference, the Korean word ‘skinship’ seems to mean “Physical Contact Love”, but these two words should not be confused.

No matter how much true love is right and unconditional for children, that love is not enough for them. You love them a lot and you have to raise them.

See each of the following sections on how to effectively communicate parental love to your children.

·         Eye contact love

·         Focused attention love and care

·         Training with love.

·         Physical contact love

·         Wrong love

3. What is love?………………………..22

The ancient Greeks used seven words to define the different states of love we can experience:

·         Storage: natural affection

·         Philia: friendship

·         Eros: sexual and erotica

·         Agape: unconditional, divine love

·         Ludus: flirting

·         Pragma: committed, married love

·         Philautia: self-love

Photo 4. A mother and a newborn baby are loving each other

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

The word love is said a lot.

“I love you.” even to a just born newborn baby, who cannot express love in words, says mom and dad.

Even at this time, the word “love” is used.

Mom and dad often say “I love you” to their young children who are growing up. Boys say a lot to boys and girls to girls, “I love you.”

A lot of people say, “God loves us and we love God.”

 “I love you” is a really common word.

Even between the opposite sex, “I love you” a lot.

Children love their mom and dad, and their mom and dad love their children.

 There are many different meanings of the word “love”.

Let’s find out more about what love means.

1.  In the Korean GookGer Da-Sachun( published in 1974 edited by Dr. Ju-dong Yang:

It defines that love is “a warm heart to care for and care for others”.

   “A man and a woman draw affectionately with each other”, and  “the heart of compassion and generosity”.

· It defined love as “God has pity on people and brings happiness”

 2. In The Korean Gook-ger Da-Sachun edited (Published in 1961) by Dr. Hee-seung Lee:   

·          “Working to cherish and care for, and such a heart”

·          “A man and a woman draw affectionately with each other, and their lover”

·          “A heart of compassion, kindness, and generosity”

·          “Passion for the realization of compassion, salvation, and happiness, not carnal and sensual. That is, sharing with the love of God who sent Jesus, the only begotten Son, the love of the neighbors, and the love of those who long for God.”

·          And defined love”

  3. In Webster’s dictionary, the  2nd Edition, Love is defined as follows.

·         “A strong affection for or attachment or devotion to a person or persons”

·         “A strong liking for or interest in something; as her love of acting”

·          “A strong, usually passionate, affection for a person of the opposite sex”

·          “The person who is the object of such an affection; a sweetheart; a lover”

·           “Sexual passion or its gratification.”

  4. In the Bible in 1 Corinthians, 13:4~7, love is

·         Love is patient,

·         Love is kind.

·         It does not envy,

·         It does not boast,

·         It is not proud.

·         It does not dishonor others,

·         It is not self-seeking,

·         It is not easily angered,

·         It keeps no record of wrongs.

·         Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

·         It always protects, always trusts always hopes, always perseveres

5.      In Agape Love

·         Spiritual love for emptying oneself and giving everything to the other without conditions (LeRoy Koopman)

·         The meaning of religious love, the love of God Love as revealed in the New Testament that God can attain mercy through the sacrifice of himself for sinners and humans, and can be concentrated with the love of Jesus

·         In Christian theology,  God’ love for man, spontaneous of men and women (Webster’s Dictionary)

“Parents love their children.”

·         “The warm hearts of parents who care for and care for their children”

·         “Parents care for their children or such a heart”,

·         Or it can be defined as the love of parents for their children in terms of “the heart and work that parents sympathize with and treat their children with kindness and generosity”.

·         To love their children, parents must truly love their children unconditionally.

·         If parents truly love their children without the condition, no matter how much they love them, they do not become spoiled children, and love does not cause side effects.

·         Relationships between couples should also be based on true unconditional love.

·         It is difficult to give 100% true love without some conditions sometimes.

·         But you should try to love close to 100%.

·         When this kind of love is full, the life of the couple will be smooth, their children will be happy, and peace and stability will be eternal in the home.

·         Furthermore, the society and the country will be peaceful.

·         Children will be happy and the parents will be happy too.

4. How to really love your children unconditionally (2)…………………………….25

Seminars was held on the subject of “How to love children” with many Korean –American parents in the US and with Koean parents in Korea.

Many parents ask, “Are there any special ways to love our children?”

And the they asked.

“Do everyone aware of it?”

“Are there any parents in this world who do not know how to love their children?”

There were also parents who asked.

“Should I learn how to  love my children?”

The answers to that questions are undoubtedly “yes”.

Parents have to learn  how to love their children.

We live in a world where parents have a difficulty time to study how to raise their children or how to love their children, and where parents cannot raise their children the way they want to raise their children because of many reason.

Parents’S live in a time when parents cannot raise their children with the love which they think the best for their children.

There are many child care books title such as “Raise your children like this”, “Train them like this”, “Love them like this way”.

And there are many pediatric guidelines that say, “Take care of your health like this”, and there is also pedagogy for parinting.

There are many guidelines for raising children, saying, “Love your children this way, raise them this way, train them like this.

“Until a few decades ago, some of the child-rearing, child-training, punishment–training, or child health care methods that most parents traditionally used were no longer available these days because outdated.

Children must be raised in the following ways, based on ethical morals that are reasonable, scientific and educational, appropriate for the country and society where they live, and in the most appropriate way of raising children who become a person with abundant knowledge and virtues.

Having a healthy mind and the body through physical education,

Match words and actions,

To take care of yourself, take of your home and family, and take care of your nation in order.

·         Be a kind person,

·         Do not lie,

·         Do not steal,

·         Do not be jealous,

·         Do not harm others,

·         Have a spirit of sacrifice,

·         Love your parents and siblings, honor your parents and serve the elderly

·         Love and help your neighbor,

·         Love the country and be loyal

·         It is a basic prerequisite that children must be taught regardless in old or now,

·         in the west or east. This kind of teaching children has been the

·         traditional parenting guideline. It is a commandment of life that you must practice now.

·         Because traditional parenting is extremely practical and is a basic principle of life.

·         These are the unchanging for raising children, no matter where in the world they lived in the east, west, north, or south, and are commandments that must be followed today.

·         We are living in an age where we cannot love, train, and raise our children according to their own thoughts and judgments, depending on the field, from         time to time.

·         Children are not the property of parents.

·         Children grow up emotionally and financially dependent on their parents, but they are independent individuals.

·         All parents should study and learn how to love and raise their children.

·         How to truly love your children and how to make unconditional love cannot be explained here either.

·         In fact, how to raise your children, how to love them, how to educate your children, how to train your children, or how to give “true and nconditionally love your children” may differ depending on the individual and the country, society where you live in.

·         That’s why it can’t even explain how to truly love their children without the condition.

·         However, the principle of “How to truly love your children without condition” is the same no matter where you live in the north, south, east, or west, and  the past or now.

·         There are a number of guides and reference books on “How to Really Love Your Children”.

·         Parents are encouraged to study a lot about how to truly love their children using the handbook or reference.

·         Bible, Buddhist scriptures, Analects of Confucius, Myungsimbogam, “How to Really Love Your Child” (published by the Navigator “True Child Love”),

·         “How to Really Love Your Teenager”, “Parents should also be at least a half  doctor.”

·         Please use the parenting guidelines.

·         As already mentioned, parents cannot own children. However, parents have to duty and responsibility to truly love their children unconditionally and to properly raise them.

5. Love your children unconditionally really (3)……28

Photo 5. Mom and Dad! I love my mom and dad as much as the wide endless oceans, as much as the highest mountains.

When mom and dad truly love their children without conditions and raise them up, the children also truly love their parents without conditions.

A smiling face reflects off the mirror as a smile and an angry face reflects off the mirror as an angry face.

The children’s world video can be said to be the video of adults in that society. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

“Love” is “a warm heart and/or work to care for others”.

There are many kinds of love, such as love between parents and children, love of between God and humanbeing, the philanthropy of Buddhism, love of Agape, love of neighbors, love between the men and the women as described in Chapter 3.

There is also unconditional love in the Bible in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.

 There are also false & wrong loves such as possessive love, conditional love, role reversal love, vicarious love and seductive  love.

People in this world live by saying “love” a lot.

However, most parents do not know the true meaning of “love”.

Furthermore, there are many words such as “unconditional love”, “conditional love” and “real love”.

However, we are not sure what the meaning of “unconditional love”, “conditional love” and “real love” means.

Even if you know it, you just know it vaguely.

I, myself don’t know what is “real love” or “false love” really means.

Also, we do not know how best to love and raise children in order to keep their mental, emotional and physical health at their best.

In particular, novice mothers and fathers do not know how to truly love their children.

Of course, we don’t even know what “unconditional love” really is.

What is “unconditional child Love”?

To make matters worse, I know “how to love my children without conditions”, but I do not know for sure.

I misunderstood, “You can love even the wrong thing your child has done without conditions.”

A lot of parents also misunderstand that “they can neglect their children to behave as they please.”

If you nurture your children by loving and training them conditionally, children will not be able to cultivate healthy self-esteem for them, and children will not be able to become productive members of society even after they grow up and become adults.

I,  myself did not know how to truly love my children unconditionally, and I raised three children one after another.

Still, it is difficult to truly love my children without conditions.

Also, I am confused to love my children that way.

Everyone too!

Many parents too are confused about how best to love when raising their children.

It is natural to think of it.

Perhaps even at this time, many parents truly love their children unconditionally, but many children do not feel that they are receiving true unconditional love from their parents.

Special congratulations and thanks to all of you who have asked about “child love and child-rearing” through “Parents should also be at least a half doctor(부모도 반의사가 되어야 한다) and asking on the Internet at “www.koreapediatrics.com”.

I believe that parents who are interested in the love of their children and study them continue to study the child-rearing.

Ross Campbell, MD. who is the author of “how to love children” is based on the experience gained in the scientific practice and the experience gained from raising three children.

 

6.The degree to which children are happy and stable depends on how happy and stable in the marriage life of the children’s mom and dad is ………………………..30

The basic necessary condition for raising stable and happy children are food, clothing, shelter, health, and love. In addition, the marriage between their mother and father must be happy, harmonious, and stable.

The children of such mothers and fathers who have a smooth and happy marriage grow happier.

If the home of the growing children is not stable, their children are not truly loved by their parents.

In order for the family to be smooth and stable, the marriage of their mothers and fathers must be stable.

This is a very basic necessary condition for children’s happiness.

That comes first.

The family can be stable and comfortable only when the relationship between their mother and father is stable, harmonious, and amicable.

The most important prerequisite is for establishing a stable, harmonious, and amicable marital relationship between the mother and father, and then their mother and father lead the family with a lot of unconditional true love.

Their mom and dad must have a lot of unconditional true love for each other.

Then, their mom and dad will be friendly and able to maintain a smooth relationship.

What is unconditional love in a marital relationship?

Unconditional love in marital relationship is ideal love.

It is impossible for a couple to achieve 100% unconditional true love with each other.

It is to be more close enough to achieve 100% unconditional that the couple lives in marriage while truly loving each other without conditions.

Then their mom and dad marriage life will be smoother and happier.

Children who grow up under such a mother and father will naturally grow happily.

Children who grow up happily and love themselves and know how to love others.

Whatever they do, they will do their best.

Only when children grow up under the parents of a happy and affable mother and father, their children feel that they grow up with full if love from their mother and father. And also children grow up with sound healthy self-esteem and pride.

They can sympathize with young children, respect the elderly, and love the poor and the weak.

They know how to discern right and wrong.

Naturally, they are loved by their parents and loved by other people.

How happy are these children?

Money cannot replace such happy children.

Of course, They can’t buy it with money.

In today’s turbulent and complex society, it is virtually very difficult to see children that mothers and fathers are living in a smooth and intimate marital relationship with each other by making a lot of unconditional and genuine love for each other.

Photo 6. Mom and Dad!

I love my mom and dad as much like the  highest mountain and as much as the endless wide ocean

Copyright ⓒ 2016John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Mom and dad must strive to have an unconditional, true loving couple.

In other words, you need to show your children that the marital relationship between the mom and  dad is smooth and that the two live happily.

Only then, their children will grow up happily and stably.

Mom and dad must have a lot of true love for each other on every day.

As Corinthians 13:4~7 Unconditional Love, nobody can love 100% as it is, but parents must love one another without conditions.

So parents have to show theie children how to truly love without condition.

Children also feel happy and grow up and develop joyfully, knowing that their parents truly love them unconditionally.

You must also teach children how to live gentle, good, polite, modest, and humble. Those who live that way truly love others.

Young children don’t have much because they are young.

After birth, young children often learn primarily a lot from their mothers and fathers.

They don’t have so much what they see, hear, and learn in their short world life.

What they see, hear, and learn in their short life , they reflect back everythings which they saw, heard, and learned in their short life to their parents and people in this world.

Children who are raised with unconditional love from their parents bring unconditional love to their parents.

Just as they received, they offer “unconditional love” to the world as well.

Children who have learned to love conditionally from their parents also love conditionally their parents or people in this world.

Even if mothers and fathers have provided their children with abundant food and healthy love, their children do not feel that they are unconditionally truly loved by their parents unless their marital relationship is smooth and they are  happy.

As already explained, unconditional love between a mother and a father is ideal.

However, mom and dad must love to be close 100% unconditional love.

Also, parents must do their best to give unconditional love to their children.

Unfortunately, divorce rates for couples in the United States these days are around 30-40%.

They are said to be almost the same or even more in the motherland, Korea. In addition, parents live separate lives due to various complex problems such as personal problems and other reasons.

There are many children who grow up under a single parent due to the death of a mother or a father.

For these or other reasons, many children are unable to grow up under their parents, mom and dad, and their families, which are the foundation and basic necessary condition of their lives, are shattered or fluctuated.

There are so many children nowadays who grow up without the love and care of their natural mothers and fathers, just as a baby bird hatched inside the nest still cannot fly into the air by its own without her mom and dad.

Nowsday the material side of life for children life is so richer and has so much but there is nothing more than a few decades ago.

There are many teenage children who are wandering around after running away from home without parents’ helps.

Some of them are also entangled in a collective snare of heretics who are only open to self-interest.

You can predict what kind of problems will come to them and what will happen to them in the future.

The quality and quantity of love between mom and dad is directly linked to the quality and quantity of love between parents and children.

“ In Parents should also be at least a half doctor(부모도 반의사가 되어야 한다).” there are repeated explanations of “how to truly love your children”.

Because it is of paramount importance to love and raise your children properly and truly.

Here again, I will talk about specific ways of how parents truly love their children unconditionally.

I’ve heard something like this.

When I asked many adolescent children, “Do you think you are truly loved by your parents without condition?”

” Only 5% of adolescent children answered Yes.

When I asked their parents, “Are you truly unconditionally loving your children?”

95% of them said, “I have been loving our children without the condition.”

Why did we get the answer like those result?

There are many reasons for those are, but it is because parents’ love for their children was not well communicated to their adolescent children because they did not know how to truly love their children.

How a sad relationship between parents and adolescent children are.

Here, mothers and fathers must learn how to love their children so that the love of their children is fully conveyed to their adolescent children.

Almost all parents love their children with eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love and care, train their children with love, and nurture their children well, but do not know how to effectively communicate between parents and their children.

Also, they don’t even know how important “real love without conditions” is when they love their children.

Photo 7. Parents must love their children unconditionally so that they love others unconditionally, establish good interpersonal relationships, do their best in this world, and live with a lot of sound healthy self–esteem and pride. Copyright ⓒ 2016 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

7. Nine kinds of  Innate temperaments …………….34

In 1960, Dr. Stella Chess and Dr. Alexander Thomas published their research on Temperaments and Behavior Disorder in Children “at the New York University Press.

The research is still widely used in pediatric psychiatry and others.

I love their research too.

It is a study that scientifically proves the Korean word “natural nature is difficult to be repaired (天性 亂改 천성 난개)”.

Let me introduce more of that study.

Their research shows that children are born with the following nine kind of  temperaments:

1. Activity level

The level of activity, such as how active or passive each child is, is determined according to the level of activity of the motor nervous system and musculoskeletal system that each child has from birth.

2. Rhythmicity/regularity versus irregularity

They are born with the temperament that determines the rhythm of life, such as the interval between the hungry and eating, the interval between each breastfeeding, the interval between bowel movement and urination, the interval between sleeping and waking.

3. Approach and withdrawal

They are born with a temperament that determines how easily accessible or atrophic they are and when they first encounter a new food, the toy, or approach a stranger for the first time.

4. Adaptability

Adaptability is the temperament that determines how easily a child can adapt to a new environment, how hard he can adapt, or how fast he can adapt or the degree to which he can adapt slowly.

5. Intensity of reaction

The temperament determines the degree of intensity of how strongly or weakly reacts to an environment.

6. Threshold of responsiveness

They are born with a temperament that determines how high the threshold to react and how low the threshold to not react.

7. Quality of mood/positive mood versus negative mood

They are born with a temperament that determines the quality of a positive mood that can play well, cheerful, and follows others well, and a negative quality of mood that cries out and hides strangers.

8. Distractability identifies

They are born with a temperament that can determine how much or less your current behavior is affected by external stimuli.

9. Attention span and persistence

They are born with a temperament that determines the duration of attention they are able to do one activity continuously and the persistence attention and they can continue to do when they encounter a disability while continuing the activity.

All children are born with these nine kind of temperaments from birth.

The level of innate temperaments, such as accessibility, atrophy, adaptability, the intensity of reaction, and quality of mood, can determine whether it is easier or more difficult to raise and care for the child.

Children with stronger responses from birth will have a greater change in emotional intensity, and the more atrophy, the more difficult it is to tolerate new changes.

The more negative the quality of their mood, the easier it is to be nervous, more easily avoided, and less loved by their parents or others.

In this way, each child has a different degree of innate temperament from birth.

It is very important for parents to analyze and find out the degree of their children’s 9 kind of innate temperaments as early as possible and to properly raise their children according to their natural temperament.

Depending on their natural innate temperament, some children are easier to raise and more accessible, while others are difficult to raise and more difficult to reach.

Depending on their natural temperament, some children love more and others loveless.

Parents of children who are easy to raise naturally and who are more accessible will grow better healthy if parents are more actively raising their children.

Parents of children who are difficult to raise and difficult to reach will not grow up soundly when parents are more passively raising them.

However, no matter what the 9 kinof natural temperaments are, whether it is easy or difficult to raise them, if you give them more of a better environment and more true unconditional love, train them with love, and nurture them well, they can grow into productive and healthy members of our society.

Knowing the 9kind of innatr  natural temperaments you have when raising your children, and in addition to your children’s temperament, there are a 25 percentile personality and a 75 percentile personality, actually the range of 1 percentile personality to 100 percentile personality. If parents know children’s personalities well, they will help to raise their children even more.

I will explain the 25 percentile personality and the 75 percentile personality in next chapter in more detailly.

Photo 12. Depending on their natural temperament, there are children who are more accessible and more easily acquainted with others. These two infants were born as fraternal twins and have different innate temperaments. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 13. Some children adapt more easily to changing environments according to their natural temperament. These two infants are fraternal twins and are born with different natural temperaments. The left girl almost always smiles a lot and the boy on the right makes a more serious look. Copyright © 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 14. Depending on their natural temperament, some children like to play more, play more cheerfully, and enjoy more. These two infants are fraternal twins and are born with different temperaments. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP7.

Children should not be raised with harmful love and wrong love. Do not give harmful love and wrong love to your children

Unfortunately, many parents give possessive love to their children without knowing it,

 and also love the seductive role, role reversal love, and vocarious love.

Possessive love, seductive love, role reversal love, and vocarious love are called false love.

In fact, this kind of child love is an extremely harmful method of love in parent-child relationships.

Still, many parents love and nurture their children in that way.

Parents take away all their children’s rights just as they own their children, and they raise them as if they were owned by their parents. This love is called possessive love.

To love a child in this way is false love. Children who are raised with such love have a lot of trouble getting through the harsh world.

Even after they reach adulthood, children are tied to their parents so that they can’t go anywhere on their own or make decisions on their own when they do anything, so that they can always hang on to their parents. How poor parent-child relationship is.

We say possessive love, but possessive love is in fact not even belong to love.

Children raised by just possessive love can be the following types of adults.

I also saw examples of parents bringing their 26-year-old children to the United States, leaving them at relatives in the United States, asking them to feed them well and educate them, and then return to Korea. These examples are examples of heritages that grow up with possessive love.

There is also a sexually tempting way to love your children. That too is false love. Parents raise their children by sexually seducing them.

The truth is one kind of child abuse, not love.

Role reversal love land nurturing is a false love that is harmful to children.

Parents should be in a position to love their children so that they grow up with sound pride. Parents should not be in a position to be loved by their inexperienced children directly or indirectly.

Unknowingly, there are parents who raise their children with possessive love, seductive love, and role reversal love. Parents think they love their children right, but in fact, such love is false love.

It is a method of love that is extremely harmful to growing and developing children.

Even after children have grown up with this wrong love, they cannot have a full happy life and can become the main reason why they cannot live a healthy social life.

Some parents do not directly or indirectly give their 30-year-old son or daughter the right to seek a partner to marry.

There are also parents who don’t even give them the right to choose a job. Some parents have all the power to make decisions for the well-being and peace of their children who reached adulthood a long time ago.

It is an example of possessive love to have a parent-child relationship by commanding this to do this and that to do that, and to guide the adult child according to the parents’ thoughts and claims.

Some parents deprive their children of economic power if their children aged 30 to 40 do not comply with their parents’ words. You must truly love your children without the condition. And parents cannot own children.

8. 25 percentile personality and 75 percentile personality …………………38

No one in this world has the same face.

Also, no one is born with the same personality and the same natural temperament.

Each child is born with his or her own personality.

Dr. Ross Campbell,MD divided the personality of children into two groups: children with 25 percentile personality and children with 75 percentile personality according to their innate personality.

This personality is determined by being embedded in the blueprint of the gene from the very time when the mom egg and dad sperm meet and become a fertilized egg.

In other words, the 25-percentile personality or 75-percentile personality is innately determined by the DNA blueprint.

The 25 percentile personality is also referred to as the Pro-authority personality, and the 75 percent personality is also referred to as the Anti-authority personality.

Authority refers to the people in an authority position, such as parents, teachers, or other social leaders. Pro means conforming to authorities.

Anti is meant to be against the authorities.

Anti- authorities refer to the character of disobeying authorities.

In fact, it is not clearly divided into two groups, one with 25 percentile personality possession and one with 75 percentile personality possession. Groups of children with a can theoretically be divided.

So am I?, or how many percentiles are ?.

There would be theologically  1~100 persontilesin the humabeings. But we devide the 25% percentile personality group and 75 percentile persolnality  group for to understand better.

Perhaps my personality is about 65 percentile, and my wife’s personality is about 45 percentile.

Then, let’s find out what is 25 percentile personality and what  is 75 percentile personality.

Children with a 75 percentile personality feel that their opinions are always better than others’ opinions.

‘I have already made plans for what I should do and how to do it in my life, from the beginning to the end of it, so no one needs to intervene or give advice about what I do.

‘Neither my mom, my dad, nor anyone else, please, block the way I plan and proceed.

Please step out’. They are born with a personality of the way they do and live like that for a lifetime.

On the contrary, children with 25 percentile personalities said, “I can help you with whatever my mom or my dad is doing today, so I’ll help. If you have anything toneed help, please tell me. Also, if you ask me to do anything else more, I will do it again. If you ask me to study, I will study and if you ask me to wash dishes, I will wash the dishes, and if you ask me to take care of a baby, I will take care of the baby.” He lives with the personality of the obedience type.

Of these two kinds of personality, which personality is more normal and which personality is abnormal.

Both of these personalities are normal personalities.

It cannot be said which one of these two personalities is better and the other is worse.

However, the personality may change somewhat depending on the environment and parenting methods of the parents while the children grow up, but the innate personality does not change significantly.

25 Percentiles More specifically about personality

Children with 25 percentile personalities feel they need to be under authority in their lives. They are individuals who live their lives under the condition that they are approved by the authorities for everything they do and praised for the results they have done, and are obedient to the authorities.

Children with a typical 25-percentile personality want the authority to choose what to do.

Work on time set by the authority.

I want you to decide what to do for me.

Even though it is finished, I want to decide when to finish it.

At first glance, it seems easy to raise children with a 25 percentile personality.

In fact, it’s harder to raise a 25 percentile personality than children with a 75 percentile personality.

Newborns with a 75 percentile personality vary from the first day of birth.

What do children with 75 percentile personalities start to do for themselves and what do they think for themselves?

 Parents should be taught children with 25 percentile personalities how to think for themselves. Also, they prefer to follow behind the authorities rather than to go ahead and lead others.

People with 25 percentile personalities have a congenial personality that fears and obeys and does not like to live alone, so they fall under the control of heretics and are subject to their control, and they are more likely to be exploited mentally and physically. Even after becoming an adult, they can become a crippled person in life who wants other people to do something for them, rather than they tried to solve their own problems by themdelf  to analyze to move forwar,.

Another thing to note is that people with a 25 percentile personality are more likely to become guilty.

Children with 25 Percentile personality use to be their tendency to feel guilty, so they are easily manipulated by others.

They themselves are guilty and unaware of a living being easily manipulated without knowing. He easily is afraid that he will always become a perfectionist and will go wrong or hurt others’ hearts.

Despite the slightest and constructive criticism, their self-image can be shattered and guilty.

“He is not satisfied even if he gets 99 points on the test because he has little confidence and so strong self-esteem. The standard of success is so high that he is not satisfied with his daily routine.

For that reason, adolescent children with a 25 percentile personality are prone to depression. They don’t express their anger outwardly, they have it deep in their hearts.

They usually seem like very good-hearted children.

Because they grow up without verbal expression of their anger, they can become more angry adults after they grow up and become adults.

Due to offended pride and dissatisfaction with needs, it is difficult for parents to sufficiently fill the love tanks of their children with 25 percent personalities. Therefore, they receive less true unconditional love than other children.

For this reason, it is easier to become a problem child as you become an adolescent. They may be more prone to negative adolescent problems such as drug addiction, prostitution, fraud, lies, runaway, and teenage pregnancy.

Parents acknowledge that there are 25 percentile personalities of children who are good-hearted, gentle, and obedient as they are told, and they should fill their love tanks with true unconditional parental love and nurture them with adequately sufficient eye contact love,  and physical contact love.

You should teach them how to properly express their anger and teach them to live with wholesome healthy self-esteem and pride. Parent urge them to take special care not to be guilty of being adjusted.

Photo 15. Depending on their natural temperament, some children like to play more cheerfully, and enjoy life more.

These two infants are fraternal twins, born of different temperaments. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Let’s find out what children are like with 75 percentile personalities.

Both of my sons’ personalities belong to 75 percentiles personalities.

My younger son is a doctor who studied the chemistry at the University of Pennsylvania, graduated from Northwestern Medical School, and specialized in internal medicine at Georgetown Medical School.

He had a 75 percentile personality, such as “I’m a physician and I’ll do whatever I want, so let me be.”

When a problem arises in his life, he analyzes by himself, what the problem is, makes a plan to solve the problem, and tries to solve it by himself.

Even problems that can be easily solved with a little help, he has a 75 percentile personality that he himself can solve.

He also controls his actions by himself.

When authorities instruct children with 75 percentile personalities to do this, do that, they easily get angry first.

They have an anti-authority personality from the first day they are born.

However, children with a 75 percentile personality have the same love tank as children with a 25 percentile personality.

With patience, acceptance, understanding, and true love without conditions, their love tanks must be filled and nurtured.

When they have a problem, they think about it for themselves, try to solve the problem on their own, and try to solve it without the help of others.

They want to be leaders.

In particular, it is easy to understand is a natural leader in a gathering of many children with 25 percentile personalities.

In fact, controlling their behavior is easier than controlling the behavior of children with a 25 percentile personality.

However, they can often bump into their authority when controlling their behavior.

Most christians these days are people with a 25 percentile personality and some with a 75 percentile personality.

It is said that the anti-religious and anti-spiritual attitudes of most children with 75 percentile personality are prevalent, and it is very difficult to change their thoughts and attitudes.

Sometimes even if they could be  an anti academy.

When raising children, it is very important to raise children according to whether their personality belongs to 25 percentile or 75 percentile personality, and to what kind of temperament they have along among the nine innate temperaments.

Now, let’s go back to the contents of the answer to the internet question that Jung Min made earlier.

If your child shows signs of such symptoms, first do a physical examination to see if he or she has anemia, any physical ailments, and any other problems.

Get a growth and development evaluation. You should also evaluate how his mother and father are together and how you raise your children.

In particular, by properly conveying parent-child love to children through eye contact love, physical contact love focused attention love, and caring.

Let me repeat 9 inherent temperaments

① Activity level is the degree of motor activity that a child inherently possesses and determines how active or passive he is.  

② Rhythmicity (regularity versus irregularity) is the predictability of such functions like hunger, feeding pattern, elimination, and sleep-awake cycle.

③ Approach or withdrawal is the nature of a child’s response to a new stimulus such as new food, toy, or person.  

④ Adaptability is the speed and ease with which a current behavior can be modified in response to altered environmental structuring.  

⑤ Intensity of reaction is the amount of energy used in mood expression.  

⑥ Threshold of responsiveness is the intensity level of stimulus required to make a response.  

⑦ Quality of mood (positive mood versus negative mood): playful, pleasant, joyful, friendly, as contrasted with unpleasant, crying, unfriendly behavior.  

⑧ Distractability identifies the effect of extraneous environment on the direction of ongoing behavior.  

⑨ Attention span and persistence is the length of time an activity is pursued by a child and the continuation of activity in face of obstacles.  

Souce -Kids who follow, kids who don’t follow. Ross Campbell 

 

 

 

9. Harmful and wrong love to your children……43

Unfortunately, many parents love possessively their children without knowing it. Some parents love their children with seductive love.

They may love their children with role reversal love.

And They may raise their children with wrong loving .

Possessive love, seductive love, role reversal love, and vicarious love are called false love and wrong love and furthermore. those kind love are not velong to love but one kind of child abuse.

In fact, this kind of parent-child love is an extremely harmful method of love in parent-child relationships.

Still, many parents love and nurture their children with that way without knowing it.

Some parents take away all their children’s rights just as they own their children, and they raise them as if they were owned by their parents.
This kind love is called possessive love.

To love a child in this way is false love, wrong love, and harmful love.

Children who are raised with such love have a lot of trouble getting through the harsh world.

Even after they reach adulthood, the children are tied to their parents so that they can’t go anywhere on their own or can’t make any decisions on their own when they do anything, so that they are always hanging on to their parents. How poor parent-child relationship is.

We say possessive love, but possessive love, in fact, doesn’t even belong to love.

Children raised by just possessive love can be the following types of adults

I also saw examples of the parents bringing their 26-year-old son from their mother country to the United States, leaving him at one of their relatives in the United States, asking them to feed him well and to take care of him, and then returning to Korea. This is one of the examples of heritages that grow up with possessive love.

There is also sexually a tempting way to love their children. That too is false love and wrong love.

Some parents raise their children by sexually seducing them without knowing that is one kind of a child abuse.

The truth is child abuse, not love.

Role reversal love and nurturing is a false love and wrong love that kind of child love is harmful to children.

Parents should be in a position to love their children so that they grow up with sound healthy self-esteem and  pride. Parents should not be in a position to love falsely wrongly their inexperienced children directly or indirectly.

Unknowingly, there are parents who raise their children with possessive love, seductive love, and role reversal love.

Parents think they love their children in right way, but in fact, such love is false love and they are very harmful and wrong.

It is a method of parent-child love that is extremely harmful to growing and developing children.

Even after their children are grown up with this wrong love, they cannot lead a full life and can become the main cause of preventing a healthy social life.

Some parents do not give right directly or indirectly to their 30-year-old son or daughter who do not obey to their parents.

There are also parents who don’t even give them the right to choose a job.

Some parents have all the power to make decisions for the well-being and peace of their children who reached adulthood long ago.

It is an example of possessive love to have a parent-child relationship by commanding to do this way and that to do that, and to guide the adult child according to the parents’ thoughts and claims.

Some parents deprive their adult children of economic power if their children aged 30 to 40 do not comply with their parents’ words.

Parents must truly love their children without such harmful conditions. And parents cannot own children. And parents should not sexually seduce children.

10. Well, How to give unconditional real love to your children (4)

Photo 8. Children who grow up with plenty of unconditional love from their parents are happy and they also love themselves and then know how to love others. Whatever they do, they will do at their best.

Children who were raised and were growing up with happy and amicable parents can feel that they grow up with the true love of their parents. Also, these children live with sound healthy self-esteem and pride.

They know how to sympathize with other children, respect the elderly, and love the poor and the weak. They know how to discern right and wrong.  Copyright ⓒ 2020 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

If a child is uglier than the other children or he is shorter or taller, slender or he is mentally physically troubled or disabled, or he is talented or not, or that child is a girl or a boy, or he is promising or not, to love him is unconditional love.

To say that you love your child unconditionally does not mean that he or she must not be accepted for the wrongdoing.

Children who are brought up under such conditional love without knowingly, they love others conditionally and also with conditionally love to treat their parents and families, conditionally love their spouse after marriage, even in marital relations and also all human relationships may be with conditional.

Children who are raised with conditional love from their parents treat their parents conditionally in the same way that their mothers and fathers loved them with the condition.

What a terrifying parent-child love relationship is.

If your child is conditionally doing something with everyone, it is also very important to see if I have lived and love others conditionally.

Parents must love their children unconditionally so that they can learn to love others unconditionally, establish good interpersonal relationships, and do their best in this world to live with sound healthy self-esteem and pride.

Many parents think that when they love their children, parents truly love their children unconditionally, but there are so many examples of children growing up without feeling that they are receiving true, unconditional love from their parents.

In the past, unfortunately, parents seem to have made a lot of mistakes when it comes to truly love their children unconditionally.

I know that many parents, including myself, are still not good at parenting, making the mistake of not truly loving my children without the condition.

At the same time, many parents claim to know how to love their children. Without learning about parenting guidelines or asking experts, many parents take care of their children at their will.

In that sense, I would like to thank them once again to all who asked about “How to Love Your Children” through my website, www.koreapediatrics.com in the many years.

Today, many parents love their children through good education through material aspects such as toys, computers, iPhones, luxury cars, famous brand clothes, foods, expensive private education, and early study abroad.

Instead of giving parents unconditional true love, they satisfy their children’s needs in a material way.

Of course, they also need adequate material access and education.

Next, let’s learn how to convey true unconditional love to our children.

11. Raise your children with good eye contact love, appropriate physical contact love, focused attention love, and care (4)

Parents should love their children with warm loving eye contact. And also parents must love them with appropriate physical contact love, such as hugs, touches, strokes, baths, and hands-on shoulders according to their ages.

If possible, the only one parent takes only one of his or her several children, and a parent-a child makes a special time to spend an hour, several hours, some times one or two days, or a week together, making him or her to be the most important person in the world. And also his or her parent gives to his child focused attentional love and care intensively so that the child feels like he or she is the parents’ most precious child. This method of love is called focused attention love and care. Without further more explanation, please try it.

I found that many parents who have never given such focused attention love and care to their children thought that they did to love their children properly.

Children who are raised without such true love can not feel that they are receiving true unconditional love from their parents, and their love is not well conveyed to them.

In particular, some children who grow up without receiving true unconditional love especially from their fathers, children do not care of whether their father is the prime minister of one of the country, or the CEO of the biggest company well recognized in the world, or a conglomerate with a thousand gold.

There are so many children and young adults around us nowadays who grew up lacking enough focused attention love and care from their parents.

 

Photo: The just-born newborn baby receiving loving eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love, and care from her mother.

The focused attention love received from parents, the warm eye contact love received from the parents, the appropriate physical contact love received from the parents, and the love training received from parents become a source of essential energy for their lives and become the light and salt in their children’ lives.

Many parents do not know how important this way of loving their children is.

Since ‘a child  was  born, he or she was an extremely valuable person, and he or she was the top priority in his or her parents-life but some parents sent him or her to his or her grandparents or to other people to raise them rather than raising them by parents themselves.”

There are many children who grow up without truly receiving eye contact love, physical contact love, and focused attention love, and care from their natural mother and father who gave birth to them.

In order to provide a good education, many children were sent abroad to study at an early age, so many children grow up without receiving enough of their parents’ warm eye contact love, physical contact love and focused attention love, and care.

There are so many children in the world who grow up like orphans who grow up without parents every day.

For one reason or another, unfortunately, there are many children here and there who grow up without enough warm eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love and care from their own parents.

Material gratification for children, which is abundant for growing young children, cannot be ignored and is important, but material gratification is no substitute for true unconditional love from parents.

Children who don’t receive enough warm eye contact love and appropriate physical contact love from their parents every day, and sometimes focused attention love and care are not adequately received, it is difficult for children to feel that they grow up with true unconditional love from their parents.

The following is an introduction to “The love of the children of Senator Paul Tongas is an example”.

 

12. US Senator Paul Tsongas’ love for his children through eye-contacting love, physical contact love, focused attention love, and care…….62

Mass. Senator Paul Tsongas’ wonderful parenting for his children with eye contact love, physical contact love, and focused attention love and care has been well known to all over worlds.

Several years ago, when US Senator Paul Tsongas, Massachusetts, spent time with his children, it became a hot topic that he truly loved and nurtured his children unconditionally through his warm eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love and care.

“I quit the US Senator.” Because “It is my responsibility and my duty to have children at the top of my life’s priorities and to truly love them unconditionally and raise them as productive children with sound healthy self-esteem and pride.”

This fact has been published in the American Academy Journal of Pediatrics and other prestigious pediatric journals and then I could read.

His noble and true laws of love for children are widely known.

Honorable Senator Paul Tsongas’s love for his children!!!!!!!!!!!

Paul Tongas was a US Senator of Massachusetts.

This story of raising children was widely known not only to Americans but to many around the world.

Also, he was a good father who truly loved and raised his teenage children without conditions.

That is why he was American children’s father who was well known to American pediatricians and perhaps to all physicians in all over the world.

He was a father who devoted for focused attention love and care to his teenage children.

His method of raising children was simple, natural, and essential.

The child-rearing method, which is a must for all parents, and the most difficult child-rearing method, was implemented to raise his children.

So it was surprised not only the Americans but also the world.

Even I found that he was a famous politician and exemplary father of adolescent children.

The true story of raising his children has been reported in several journals including the American Academy of Pediatrics already mentioned above and Five Cries of Parents.

Senator Paul Tsongas had a conversation with Boston Glover while he was on the flight from Washington to Boston in the broad daylight.

At that time, Senator Paul Tsongas had neither a travel bag nor a briefcase, and no aide to help him.

However, it is said that there was only his daughter next to him.

His family is the most important priority in his life, he said to them.

He was an ordinary father who thought spending enough time with his family was the most important thing in his life. It was his child-parent relationship that pierced the hearts of all our parents.

It is an example of showing that he truly loves his children and that the family is the number one priority in his life.

When he took a flight from Washington to Boston to attend an official meeting in Boston, on the plane he had only one little daughter who was about to enter the kindergarten.

In another time, he took only one daughter from her middle school, took a plane to Boston, and took her with him in the conference room.

There is also a true story that during the same night, she took his daughter and returned to Washington home by the plane.

One day he had a teenage boy called in, and on the second Saturday of the following month, his son and the only Senator Tsongas together had promised to go on a two-day long trip.

There have been no changes since then until one day before now.

But the day before the trip, his adolescent son came to his father, a senator, and said, “Father! I can’t go on a trip with you, my father, tomorrow. I’m sorry.”

“Why?” he asked.

The son’s answer was like this.

“It’s because I have to date my girlfriend all of a sudden,” he replied.

Paul Tsongas was the famous U.S. Senator, a father of his teenage son, the husband of his beloved wife.

He was a public figure and how busy. He must have lived as an ordinary father.

You can guess.

Here, Senator Paul Tsongas put his children first and foremost.

This episode also showed us that he was a politician who knew and practiced that children were at the top of his priority in his life.

You can guess how difficult he must have had to live the right life and be chased by time in the turbulent life of this world every day.

He traveled with his children one by one, and sometimes with them all, and he would have focused on his love for his children.

And he would have taken care of it.

He must have loved his children with warm, compassionate, gentle, humble, and smiling eyes.

He may have loved your children through proper physical contact love.

Many parents would have made the parent-child conversation honest and serious, loving their children with focused attention love, and care that are difficult to do.

In addition, his love for his children was unconditional and he would have truly loved.

Senator Paul Tsongas’s love for her children surprised everyone, not just our pediatricians.

While I was in the busy pediatric practice for almost 40 years, I was too busy to take of my children, and the years passed by like the lightning.

In the meantime, my three children grew up, became adults, attended colleges, graduated from, left my side, and lived independently far away.

Let me give some focusd attention love example here again.

 There were many pediatricians around me.

They also seemed to be very busy living in pediatric practice, almost similar to me.

However, there was one of the pediatricians that I particularly admire.

He had a very busy pediatric practice like other doctors in the town.

He took his two daughters who were in elementary school to go to shopping malls here and there, and when he had a pediatric meeting at the hospital, he brought the two daughters to the hospital pediatric conference room with him, seated them next to him, and attended together until the meeting was over.

During the meeting, when I sneaked to look at them still, he touched the shoulders of the two daughters, and then they looked at each other with a loving smile and whispered.

And sometimes he brought his mother to the hospital’s pediatric conference room and had a pediatric meeting with him.

One time, because I had suddenly a personal problem, I had to go somewhere and asked him few hours to take care of my patients as needed on behalf of me and then I would pay a considerable amount of the money, but he told me that he had promised to go to the circus with his daughters and then he refused to help me.

He was one of the pediatricians who regarded his family as the number one priority in life and his children as the number one priority in his life.

Here, hoping for your forgiveness, May I mention a little about my father’s parenting on me.

One day I met a Korean politician who recently came to the house of a famous professor who was living near my house here.

Visiting politician was younger than me.

The Korean politician asked me “where was your hometown” in front of the professor.

I said, “Jangdeungpo, Jungjang-ri, Anmyeondo-eup, Taean-gun,” and he said, “You  are one kind of a dragon in Gaecheon(개천에서 난 촌놈).”

I remember his words vividly up to now and I use it to write these book.

When I graduated from Ahnjoong elementary school,  my father was there.  He was at any events in elementary school, of course, on the day of the junior high school entrance and graduation ceremonies, when I graduated from high school, and at the college graduation ceremony, my father was there for me.

He used also to take me to the local feast in the birth town, and when any guests came to my house, he called me to greet the guests, educated me, and introduced me to them.

I don’t know how much my father took care of me while giving me focused attention love and care. How can I count the love of all which he gave me?

Parents!

Of course, material help is also extremely in need for children.

But more important than that, and perhaps most important, is the true unconditional love to make their children put at the highest priority of parents.

If possible, only one child and only a parent spend time alone, pouring out a lot of focused attention love, and care for the child, and the love of a parent who cares for the child is extremely necessary.

The price is very expensive.

Senator Paul Tongas was a father who lived with his children as the number one priority in life.

13. Children are the first priority in parents life………..52

Photo 9. Focused attention love and care received from parents,

The warm eye contact love received from parents,

The appropriate physical contact love received from parents,

The loving training received from parents become the main source of essential energy in their children’s lives.

And they become the light and the salt in their children’s lives.

If the son or daughter has received enough unconditional love, true love, they live with the sound healthy self-esteem and pride and such healthy self-esteem throughout his or her life.

They become productive members in society.

Their eyes are also beautiful when dealing with the other person.

 Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Parents need to know a lot about how to raise their children so that their children can become productive members of society with healthy self-esteem and pride, not only while they are growing up, but also after they have grown up and become adults.

Every parents have a lot of things to do in their own daily life for children.

 In some cases, at the very same time, there are a lot of things to do in a parent’s life.

Their should prioritize what they have to do at that time based on what and how important it is.

In other words, they have to judge what is most important in their life. Prioritize what you should do.

You have to work according to that priority.

Parents themselves must decide their own life priorities.

Some parents value honor more than their children, such as the money or some work more than their children, and socializing more than raising their children.

Fame or money is the number one priority in some parents’ lives. Of course, fame, money, work, and socializing are also important in their life.

All parents must set priorities in their life.

Most of those who are successful economically, socially, and politically make God, himself or herself,  wife, or husband, and his or his children as a priority order in their lives.

I, myself is at the most important priority in my life, then my wife or my husband, and then the next most important priority in my life is neither the money nor the honor nor the work. It is the children.

There is also a word that is a model of life in the Orient, called “Sushin-jega (修身齊家 수신제가).

Let’s assume that we don’t know what our life priorities are and that we live by coping with situations that happen every moment or every day in our daily life or raise our children without making life priorities.

Imagine living with the honor, money, and management of their parents which are parents’s priority over children Children will be disappointed.

 Parents learn that they do not truly love them without condition.

You will feel that “my parents treat and nurture me with no value more than money, more than work, more than honor.”

Children are at the forefront of each parent’s life.

14.Training your child with love …..53

 Children need to be trained with love in order for them to grow up properly, have healthy self-esteem and pride, and become productive adults in society . 

When many parents say that children should be trained and they must first train their children strictly and coldly, like Hahn Seokbong’s mother, and train them in a Spartan manner according to certain strict rules as in the military.

I think it can, but it’s a wrong idea. 

When training your children, you need to train them with tender love, which should be reasonable, consecutive, logical, and with common sense. 

Parents need to train their children with love, setting an example for their children based on the right actions or words, parenting guidelines, or model text. 

In particular, parents should train their children with exemplary words and actions with “words and actions (언행일치)’. 

School teachers, leaders of society and the state, or adults from all lives must train them with love, setting healthy, right, and good examples to children. 

Still, it is difficult to find honesty and truth in the world we live in.  

You shouldn’t train your children in “Do as I say, don’t do as I do”. 

In many families, almost all of them are many chiefs and there are no crew or workers. All around them are Chiefs and CEOs, there are no indians and no employees. Everyone shouts loudly. There are many parents who speak without a subject or a verb. 

You have freedom, but you don’t know what is freedom. You have rights but no obligations.

 He doesn’t know what It means by “Freedom is not free” and he knows everything is free.

Mangja kunja Sam-rak-ji-gyo (군자 三樂之敎 군자삼락지교 ) is a good example for parents who train their children.You have to train your children with love.

Yes, but they purely follow their parents’ training.

Sometimes they don’t need training.

Do all the right things voluntarily.

This is what parents want. Children must be trained and raised with true

unconditional love. 

  

Picture 32. Children with good eyes contacts are popular and like others. They have more of healthy self-esteem.

It also teaches us that the habit of dealing with people with good eye contact and smiling faces can determine success.

When trained with love, they grow into happy children.

If you train hard, your children feel uncomfortable and hate to talk and become depressed.

They don’t talk to their parents about the complaints and worries that they have deep in their hearts.

 When parents laugh, children laugh and respond. Children are afraid when their parents are angry.

Copyright © 2012 John Sangwon Lee., MD., FAAP 

 The steps to train your child with love.

The training is conducted by the first to make “a please or requesting”.

If they do not respond to requests,  then they are trained next by commanding or rewarding.

If they do not respond to parental training even if they are given orders or rewards, they are trained in the order of loving punishment or expert counseling.

1.       You must first train with a petition or request.

2.       When training children, parents must first quietly, lovingly, and first

     ask, “Please do this to your children.”

Parents must remember to say “Thank you” if your child complies and follows your petition.

It is to train with love like this.

When a 2-year-old child does something for you, parents have to say “Thank you,”

I don’t know how wonderful it is to see them say “No, thank you” if children don’t like to do it. This is one aspect of American-style child training.

If he or she  does not comply with the parent’s request, the parents should immediately check the following:

Find out if the parent’s petition was appropriate for the child’s age, level of development, and ability.

And then find out if the child has any mental or physical abnormalities,

and also find out if the child is hungry,

and find out if the child is growing up with enough true unconditional love from his parents,

You need to find out if your child’s love tank is full of parental eye contact love, physical contact love, and focused attention love, and care.

If everything described above is fully stocked for the child and that child  does not comply with his or her parent’s petition,

If the parent does the petition one or two more times and the child complies with the parents petition, the child should be trained accordingly.

If he or she does not comply with the petition once or twice again, the parent will go on to the next level of training.

2. If he or she does not obey or rebel with parents’ petitions, parents may be ordered to do so, trained to do so, trained in behavior modification, or trained in punishment.

If he or she  does not listen to or rebel with a second or third petition, whether he or she is ordered to do so and trained

Whether to modify the behavior,

Whether to get expert counseling,

It can be also trained as a punishment.

At this time, parents should learn and study through their reference books on normal growth and development in order to know how to plead for what is appropriate training for their age.

Otherwise, parents should consult with a pediatrician, child care specialist, or appropriate specialist.

Parents should also read “ Parent should become at least a half a doctor-부모도 반의사가 되어야 한다” or other child care books

Here too, parents should at least study their child’s training and parents should become at least a half a doctor.

Parents’ needs or orders must be appropriate.

Sometimes everything is normal for the child in training in emotionally, mentally, spiritually, but there may be financial problems on the parents’ side, and parents’ demands or orders may not be appropriate.

When parents raise and train their children, anger must be well controlled.

Parents can be very angry with their children when raising and training their children.

If parents are unstable economically, spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and professionally, they can be angrier with their children.

When training your children, you must be extremely careful not to be angry with them.

If possible, you should not train your child for any corporal punishment.

All studies show that corporal punishment has negative consequences for raising children.

It is not recommended to train your child with corporal punishment.

It is important to first find out if there is anything wrong in the parent child-rearing methods such as following, where no parents need to punish their children at least once or more often, and if they have to be punished at least once or often, whether the parent’s training method is wrong or they have not given their children unconditional true love.

If parents make a mistake, parents should apologize.

If the reckless make a mistake, parents must cancel the request and apologize.

Parents should apologize to their children if they have been punished for no wrongdoing. Normally, if necessary, parents should apologize for wrongdoing for their children.

If your child is well trained by parents, you should not spare praise.

Parents should be relentlessly complimenting our well-trained children.

For what he has done wrong, you must take the right opportunity to correct each and every wrong thing and train it with love.

When making love with eye contact, physical contact, and focused attention love, and care, “I love you.” Whenever possible, instead of saying “you”, parents should use his or her name and also say “I love you,” appropriately at the moment, so that children can confirm that they are truly loved by their parents.

15. Communication between parents and their

children…74

Communication between parents and their children is very important in raising their children to live safely, healthy, and happily.

Ask, Talk, and Listen are the keys to a successful Communication.

Ask about the interpersonal relationship between your child and his or her friends, your child, and his or her peers, or with someone else.

In particular, parents guide their children through parent-child conversation so that the children do not go wrong with wrong information obtained from the Internet and others.

Find out if he or she is bullying or being bullied.

Listen to your children and listen to them.

Listen to your child’s trivial words and talk to him or her often, and if children have any problems, solve problems, and raise them with love.

Source: American Academy Pediatrics (This poster is a grant received from CDC, produced at the American Academy of Pediatrics and is being used for parent education.

Definition of Communication

The conversation is a way for at least two people to share and exchange each other’s thoughts, feelings, ideas, opinions, and information using language, letters, signs, and gestures (physical language).

Why parent-child conversation Is the necessary?

A few years ago, a 13-year-old adolescent girl who had been trying to commit suicide after taking a lot of Tylenol was treated by me at a hospital emergency room.

There was no doubt that the girl was a pretty, smart adolescent girl with a plump body and a clear feature.

Her face was full of melancholy.

“I’m so annoyed to study at school, follow the teacher’s words, or hear my friends, but my mom and dad told me to study, study, stay at home, and do not go anywhere in the night. They didn’t understand me at all, they just bothered me. I just wanted to die, so I took the medicine,” she said to me.

The girl also told me that “my boyfriend abandoned me and I was very upset because he liked one of girls in my classmates.”

The two parents are middle-aged in their 40s. Her father was a university professor, and her mother was a trusted local lawyer.

They were very embarrassed and wept. “I allowed Jennifer to do whatever she wanted to do.

I bought for her everything that she wanted to have, but I can’t understand why she tried to commit suicide. Before puberty came, the three of us sat down and talked a lot.

The three of us went on a trip together and went to the camp.

About a year ago, she was the same girl, we’ve been living as we are.

As we have been chased by a busy life, the three of us did not have an hour a week to sit down and chat recently.

So could it be?

I have no idea that she is suffering from such a severe adolescent illness.”

She closed her speech.

“Studied hard, got a job, got chased by work-life, volunteer at the church, doing this and that. As the years passed very fast by, children were born and in the blink of an eye they grew up, they became in puberty state and they were growing as adolescent children and became into young people. They went to college these days.

On the one hand, it was fun to see children who grew up quickly and independently left their parents in such a short period of time without knowing it. But sometimes I got depressed and afraid.

Adolescent children worried a lot unknowingly about having problems and conflicts that arose in themselves or in adolescent society.

Sharing and exchanging thoughts, feelings, ideas, opinions, and information that adolescents and parents have with each other through conversation can make it easier to understand and resolve misunderstandings that may arise between parents and adolescents.

Parents can help and solve their adolescent problems thru parent-adolescent communication.

You can prevent problems from occurring in your adolescent children in advance.

It should be noted that almost all adolescent children can develop “puberty problems” (“puberty disease”).

Parents should communicate with their adolescent children about the right puberty issues at the right time, address them, and prevent them from occurring.

Picture 80. “I love you.” At Buyeo Public Park, the name of the sculptor is unknown

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

Photo 81. Newborns and infants communicate their feelings and intentions with their parents through crying language. They also communicate with their parents by expressing their intentions through physical language. Their crying is language. Crying is a common language with the country, the race, the age, or individual difference.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP.

 

Photo 82. Help me.

I don’t want to sit here alone. Mom and Dad help me. Newborns, infants, school-age children, and the adolescents communicate by expressing their intentions in either crying words or in physical language. Their crying is a kind of language. Parents should listen and listen to their words.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP.

Parent-child conversation

When talking with your children before to become puberty, or with your adolescent children, it’s better to set aside a time for conversation and talk to them at that time.

Of course, you can use the opportunity that arises from time to time to talk about a topic.

Even when parents need to talk to their adolescent children, set a conversation time to talk to, if possible, and talk at that time.

As parents think,  all children and young children are not able to properly express their opinions or feelings in words.

Nevertheless, many parents hope that their adolescent children’s thoughts, feelings, and problems will be maturely expressed and communicated appropriately to parents through parent-child dialogue and communication.

The necessity to communicate between parents and children through conversation and articles on how to communicate can be read frequently in the media such as newspapers, magazines, and the Internet. Adolescent children can learn how to communicate through public media such as TV, the Internet, the iPad and so on. However, most of the methods of communication between parents and children obtained through public media are too formal. Sometimes some communication methods are not applicable to the present life of adolescent children.

The conversation is absolutely necessary even in everyday life.

So, there is also a saying, “Conversation is food.”

Dialogue between parents and children is a necessity for parenting.

Nevertheless, elementary, middle, and high schools do not teach students a very basic way to communicate.

In addition, neither the university nor the liberal arts subjects were taught to students.

There are few opportunities to learn fundamentally necessary communication methods.

For one reason or another, most parents, including myself, raise their children without knowing how to properly communicate with them.

In addition, the generational gap between children and parents, parents may interfere understand their child’s problems during conversations between parents and children, and parents and children may misunderstand each other during conversation. Problems can arise frequently during parent-child conversations.

So, when can parents start talking with their children?

Mom and Dad have to start talking to the fetus growing in the mom’s womb.

You also have to talk to your newborn baby at birth.

Today, there are many cases where a father helps his wife who is delivering at a delivery table in the hospital.

When a baby is born, the dad helps the childbirth next to the giving birthing wife, and is very important in making  parent-child loving bonding withholding the blood-red newborn baby and “ I love you, baby at the delivery room’’

You have to say “I love you” while holding your newborn baby in the delivery.

This kind of parent-child love bonding is perhaps the most important love in the entire child-raising process.

Imagine that when your beloved child was born, his father was doing what, where but not seeing the baby.

The newborn baby, who was just waiting to see his father and mom or her father or mom, replied to his dad and his mom in physical language and crying language with a glance, saying “I love you guy too”.

We pediatricians can often see this beautiful birthing room conversation between his father, mom and the just born newborn baby.

There are many times when a newborn baby simply ignores talking with his father or mother in this physical language.

When a baby is born, all fathers should be waiting next to the giving birth wife, and then how about deciding a this kind of delivery method at a nationwide level to form a bonding between the newborn baby and the parents in the birthing room.

The relationship between parents and children who live every day by communicating with their children in newborns, infancy, school age, and puberty adolescents frequently to exchange love and receive each other is truly beautiful.

While children are growing up and living independently from their parents, it is very beautiful that children and parents exchange love with each other through frequent conversations, and continue to live in a love-bonding relationship between parents and children.

Even after the children have grown up and left their parents, it is also very beautiful to solve problems between parents and children through dialogue and share the joys and sorrows that can occur between parents and children through casual daily lives.

It will be easy to understand. That conversation is essential to raising healthy and productive children.

“When parents communicate with their children, there are many methods of communication between parents and children that say, “Children and parents should talk like this.” However, the communication method cannot be fixed.

Depending on the child’s age, intelligence, maturity, time and place, and the subject of the conversation, the conversation method should be strictly different.

Parents should never communicate with their children in an authoritative manner and in strict words and actions.

Depending on the time, place, and situation, parents must talk from the standpoint of a guardian, from the standpoint of their children’s parents, sometimes from the standpoint of their child’s best friend, or from the standpoint of their peers.

Before the conversation begins, the message that parents truly love their children without condition should be given.

It is important for parents to start a conversation by delivering good eye contact love, appropriate physical contact love, and focused attention love, and care to their children if possible.

Then, conversations between parents and children begin and proceed easily.

 

Photo 83. Even when feeding artificial nutrition, the baby is held fondly softly to give physical contact love and feed while having a conversation.

When talking, you should entertain the other person with lovely and kind eye contact. If you look down, sideways, or elsewhere during a conversation, he or she doesn’t taste the conversation.

Moreover, when you respond to a conversation with an uneasy look, he or she doesn’t want to continue the conversation.

Your gaze, eye contact or physical language during conversation is really important to have a good conversation.

While feeding the baby with artificial nutrients with a milk bottle, if parents do not hug him, do not give physical contact love and do not give with eye contact, if no physical language or words, and don’t talk to their babies, there is no love. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 84. The dad talks while giving physical contact love to his baby, loving him with his eye contact love, and loving with body language. The baby also responds to his father with eye contact love and physical contact love and body language. They are having a conversation while exchanging love with each other.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD, FAAP

At the same time, depending on the situation, the age of the child, the love of parents is conveyed to the child with lovely and smiling eye contact, and at the same time, physical contact love is achieved by holding the child’s hand or gently touching the shoulder or back with the parent’s hand If both talk for while, you can make the conversation more serious and better.

When talking to a newborn or an infant, hold him in the arms of his mother and talk to him while you give love in eye contact, and the newborn infant will feel comfortable and will respond with physical language, baby words, or crying words.

Sometimes during the conversation, your child does not accept physical contact love and avoids eye contact love.

This is particularly likely to occur in conversations between parents and adolescents who are not ready for conversation.

When making physical contact love to your adolescent child, you should be comfortable with the child in as short as possible. It shouldn’t be excessive or awkward and should be appropriate.

In particular, you should avoid making appropriate physical contact love when talking with the adolescent child who is not your own adolescent child.

Except in emergencies, when it is necessary to have a conversation between parents and children, an appropriate time should be set for both parents and children.

Don’t set a time for one-sided conversation.

This is especially the case when you have to communicate with your adolescent children.

When your child having fun with something, studying for an exam, or doing an important job, when he is very upset, when he doesn’t have time to talk, no matter how young he is, you can’t make parent-child dialogue smooth.

Parents, too, can sometimes find it difficult to comfortably communicate for a number of reasons.

In particular, they are unable to smoothly communicate with their children who are hurt or stressed over their own or other people’s, or who have physical or mental problems.

Parents should recognize that even if their children are young, they are independent individuals and respect their problems.

No matter how young your child may be, parents must be extremely careful when talking about his personal matters.

 Photo 85. “Mom and Dad! I love mom and dad a lot, the high like a mountain, the wide and deep like the ocean.” his mother replies, “I do too.” Regardless of age, you should have a lot of conversation.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 This is especially the case when talking about the private issues of adolescent children.

Conversations in the presence of brothers or sisters, other family members, or third parties about the child’s private matters should be avoided. Even when conversasing with your pre-adolescent children, choose a quiet place as possible and have a quiet, logical, and rational conversation there.

Practice conversations logically and reasonably with topics and information to be discussed in advance.

A parent can open the door to a child’s psychological barrier if one parent sets aside time and has only one child while conversing with their child with focused attention love and care.

At this time, the child can get the help of parents by taking out a very private problem that they have deep inside the heart and having a conversation with their parents about the problem.

Conversation can be facilitated by taking advantage of the opportunity that only one of the children is at home, and a mom or dad can give focused attention love to the child

 It is also important to find opportunities for a conversation like this.

One parent and two children traveling for hours, days, or even longer periods of time, going to movies, going fishing, going for a walk, eating at a local restaurant, driving to and from anywhere, playing golf, or in other cases, if you give focused attention love and care for and love a child while focusing on one child, the closed door of the psychological defense wall deeply located in the child’s heart begins to open gradually, but at beginning it will not be presented all the conflicts that are held deep in the heart.  A serious conversation can be held by exposing problem thoughts to parents, seeking their opinions, and exchanging their opinions with them.

In particular, there are many times when adolescents need some preliminary time to talk to their parents before they start talking to their parents.

Before starting a conversation, it provides a preliminary time for conversation, but if you pour all of your focused attention love, and care, you and he can have the best conversation.

Before the psychological barrier gates gradually more widely open, most adolescent children begin to talk about very superficial matters, trivial issues at first, then open more widely the door over the time and the more serious problems, topics, or heartbreaking that he has. He can also take out complaints that he kept deep in his heart and he asks for the opinions of parents.

If he feels more comfortable talking to his parents, feels more reliable in his parents, and is confident that he can continue the conversation and that his parents is listening seriously and earnestly, sometimes his personal problems arising from such as heterosexual friendships are also voluntary. He will take it out and talk to his parents, listen to his parents’ opinions and advice, and have a conversation while exchanging opinions.

He can talk about personal problems with his peers or friends, or about problems that arise in his relationship with them.

Not only that, but you can also have conversations about his school life, study issues, and future life appropriately at his age.

When he receives focused attention love and care, trusts his parents wholly, and thinks that he can present his problems, he will confess all the complaints against his parents and discuss all the problems in his heart.

Whenever your child has any emotional problems, focusing on loving conversations can give you a glimpse into the problem.

Parents should not miss the opportunity.

Just like pulling a single clue out of a tangled skein and pulling out a tangled skein, you can find out what’s wrong with the child through conversation and solve it.

Photo 86. “Dad! I hate to eat it because it is sour, salty, sweet, and bitter.”

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

In this respect, focused attention love and care can serve as a facilitator to smooth conversations with children and can be the basis of conversational means.

Sometimes, when adolescents want to talk to their parents, they watch their parents’ attention to see if they can talk to them.

He can hide the actual topic and he wants to talk to behind and start a conversation about the problem by wiping out another topic that isn’t weird.

Then, if he believes that his parents truly love and accept him and that they can help to solve his problems, he can get a sneak peek of the real problem deep in his heart.

Parents with adolescent children should always be prepared to hold on to the clues during their usual life with their adolescent children and to start a conversation with them.

When the clues of the storyline of the conversation appear a little, it would be good to hold onto it and start the conversation immediately.

Parents are alerted to words that are difficult to find for certain reasons, or to each behavior of their adolescent children, and are prepared and coping with them so that they can start a conversation.

At that time, as if communicating with each other through parent-child dialogue, pulling clues from a tangled thread, parents have to grasp the real problem and parents solve the problem.

For this reason, parents need to learn and practice a lot of communication skills and communication skills with their children.

In this respect, “parents should also be at least a half doctor.” I want to say it again.

It is often said, “Parents should communicate with their children often”.

Then, when asked how to talk, there are good answers such as “Parents should listen to their children until the end” during conversations, “Parents should not be angry” and “Respect the character of their children” during the conversation. That alone is not enough.

However, sometimes there is a recommendation to say, “If he does not respond to the conversation, keep putting pressure on your child to force the conversation.”

This is very wrong and is one of the ways you should never use parent-child conversations.

Here is an article from the book HOW TO REALLY LOVE YOUR TEENAGER, by a pediatric psychiatrist, Ross Campbell., MD.

“I’m often struggling to solve the typical problems that adolescents usually face.

Sometimes, when parents begging other parents to talk to a depressed adolescent, the adolescent child communicates primarily with “uh-uh”, “uh-uh”, or similar throat sounds, or by a shrugging body language. It is useless to continue forcing the adolescent to talk to each other when playing mainly, but rather, it makes each other angry.

It is very wrong to compel the adolescent child to answer on the spot, even if he is aware of that fact and repeatedly asks questions about a problem several times.

It can worsen the parent-child relationship.

When parents have no type of pressure to talk to such adolescent children and spend more than 20 to 30 minutes with more positive problems and a lot of focused attention, the door of the child’s psychological defence barrier gate will gradually open. From this point on, he said that it is a good way to communicate gradually.”

It was reported that parents with adolescent children and their adolescent children were surveyed.

When asked how often adolescent children communicate with their parents, only 5% of adolescent children answered “yes”.

When asked if their parents of the adolescent children how frequently they are talking with their adolescent children, 95% of the parents of the adolescent children said “yes.”

Let’s go back to the story of Jennifer who tried to commit suicide!

When Jennifer’s boyfriend no longer likes her and prefers other girlfriends in her class, Jennifer once or twice wanted to ask her dad or mom how to solve the problem and listen to their parents’ opinions.

So it wasn’t once or twice that she gave a clue to her mom and dad to solve the problem.

In addition, Jennifer, like other adolescent children, is concerned about her anxiety, worries, conflicts, problems in the future, career choices, college selection, her physical condition, relationships with her peers and friends, substance abuse or alcohol problems, and adolescent sex problems. In relation to various adolescent problems, such as health problems, through parent-child conversations, they would have been struggling to listen to the opinions from her mother and her fathers, get advice and get solutions.

Parents, like their best friends, would have been eager to help their children, sometimes in the position of their most trusted counselor, and sometimes, like a counselor, wishing to solve their problems.

Unfortunately, Jennifer’s mom and dad weren’t able to communicate smoothly with Jennifer, like sometimes parents, friends, or counselors, because they were busy with their personal business, working at work, attending social gatherings, etc.

What’s more, conversations between parents and children have been almost cut off since they recently came in.

If Jennifer and her parents had a smooth conversation in the usual way, Jennifer’s parents would have been able to resolve Jennifer’s trouble-adolescent disease.

Jennifer would have had fun as a happy adolescent girl.

Of course, she may not have even attempted suicide.

There is one thing to pick up here.

Parents with adolescent children who solve with their parents through parent-adolescent dialogue about extremely private problems with their children are evidence that they are raising their children well. So I raise my hands up and congratulate.

It can be said that a family where the relationship between parents and children, especially adolescent children, can be made smoothly and is really happy.

Parents should never declare that they will no longer talk to their adolescent children.

If you don’t have time to talk, you can set an appropriate time again according to the topic or situation of the conversation and talk at that time.

If there is a disagreement or misunderstanding during the conversation that parent-child dialogue cannot continue anymore, the parent is too authoritative, or if the parent-child dialogue is under pressure, each other can naturally become angry.

Whatever the reason, you should never break the line of a parent-child conversation.

The parent-child conversation line was broken

Whatever the reason, you should never break the line of a parent-child conversation line.

If you think once that the line of parent-child dialogue is broken, this is a really unfortunate parent-child relationship.

Parent-child conversation lines should never be cut off.

When, for any reason, the parent-child conversation can no longer be continued, the parent must always be on the lookout for the child to return to the parent at any time and have the conversation again.

You have to decide a time and place to talk again right then and keep that promise with each other.

When parents and children are unable to resume the conversation or can no longer continue the conversation, they can have a school counselor, a regular pediatrician, a pastor with a counseling education license, or another with the help of an expert and parent need to find out what problems your adolescent children are, solve them, and prevent any problems related to them.

Young children have surprisingly a lot of knowledge and information in some way.

Often, parents are sometimes surprised.

Most adolescent children have more up-to-date knowledge or common sense than their parents have.

For this reason, even if you try to take the parent-child conversation seriously, you may not be able to communicate well with your adolescent child.

Not all parents can facilitate parent-child dialogue. In other words, not all parents have knowledge or communication skills to facilitate communication.

In this case, it is more desirable to seek help from a regular pediatrician or an appropriate counselor to solve the child’s problem through counseling.

For reference, there is a growing trend in pediatric clinics now offering counseling to solve problems such as mental, emotional, psychological, and behavioral disorders of children.

Even when parents have conversations with their children, they must listen carefully until they are finished.

Depending on his abilities and age, parents should choose simple, easy-to-understand words to respond to the conversation.

Parent-child conversations should not be made by using difficult words or sentences that cannot be understood.

In order to make sure that the parents understand what the child has said, it is often necessary to have a parent-child conversation by quoting what the child has said and talking to the child, making sure that the child has heard it correctly.

It is also important for parents to speak with their children in a position to show love and care for their children and to help them.

Sometimes during a conversation, you can’t be sure to answer your child’s questions.

That said, you shouldn’t answer their questions unfaithfully and casually.

If there is a problem in the conversation that you cannot answer for sure, you should take the time to think more about it or research it later and promise to answer it.

Sometimes, when you are asked a question from a child that you don’t need to answer right away, you can respond naturally to each other over time after answering that you will answer it later. In other words, time can sometimes solve the problem.

You can answer it quickly, but if you don’t want to answer the question right away, you can promise to answer it in a while.

For example, when a 16-year-old son says he plans to join the military when he turns 18 years old and asks for his father’s opinion, he can promise to answer in a few months or a year if he doesn’t want to answer right away. Of course, you must keep that promise.

There are also a girl with a submissive professional authority type with 25 percentle personality, who are obedient to professional, authoritative, and absolutely obedient, such as  baby sitting when asked to do a baby sitting, doing to wash the dishes asked to do, and studying if a parent’s command is given.

These children are said to possess a 25 percentile personality. Or, they are said to be children with “professional authority personality”.

On the contrary, what I want to do is that I have already decided, so my parents report this, do that. Do not give orders or intervene, do not block my path, and there are children who are disobedient.

These children are said to possess a 75 percentile personality. Or, they are said to have an “anti-authoritative personality”.

All children are born with nine temperaments from birth. Depending on which of the nine temperaments is more prominent, some are easy to handle, some are difficult to handle, some are easy to talk, some are difficult to communicate.

Parents should be aware of their children’s temperament, respect their temperament, and communicate appropriately according to their temperament and personality.

Sometimes parent-child conversations do not go smoothly or do not respond to parents’ requests or orders.

Sometimes it is necessary to reconsider whether the topic of conversation is inappropriate, based on the age or ability of the child, whether it is an appropriate request or an inappropriate order

Photo 87. Children who have been trained and raised through productive and sound parent-child conversations with unconditional love are excellent without being involved in drugs, alcohol, smoking, crime, teenage pregnancy, depression, rebellion against authority, runaway, gang membership, etc. Grown-up as an adult. “Mom and dad! Me too

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 If the conversation doesn’t go well, parents need to re-evaluate whether the child’s love tank is unconditionally filled with true love.

You should also find out if you or your children are physically, mentally, and emotionally sound.

It is important to determine whether the subject of the conversation is appropriate for the child’s age and intelligence, but it is important to consider whether the method of communication is appropriate for the parent or the child and whether the time and place for the conversation is appropriate for both parent and the child.

For example, if you asked a three-year-old to distinguish between blue, red, and yellow color, a child could not be clearly distinguished, the parents made a request that did not fit the child’s age, abilities, and development.

Newborns, infants, school-age children, and adolescents all want to talk to their parents.

Dialogue is food, vitamins, food supplements, and necessities of life in raising children. And it is food.

Especially when they suffer mentally and physically, they want to receive the eye contact love and physical contact love from their parents.

They want to get and hear the whispers of love from their parents through conversation.

When school grades are low when parents are far away and a child is alone,  when they have an accident for some reason, when they fall out of good competition, their children want to hear a word or two of their parents’ warm words of love and encouragement.

And through conversation, they want their parents to solve their problems.

When you have a conversation, you should listen carefully and intently to your child’s words and respond to the conversation in gentle words.

Instead of talking with your children only when you are scolding, admonishing, or training them over a problem, you should have a habit of talking with them regularly from an early age.

They  said, “Silence is gold,” and “did you sleep well.” “How have you been today.” You shouldn’t treat your children without saying very basic things like “I Love You”.

Depending on the subject, depending on your needs, you can keep the conversation long or short depending on your child’s age, but you can shorten it by a minute or two of the day.

If you have a habit of regular conversation from infancy, parents are comfortable with each other even when talking with their adolescent children.

A number of common problems that adolescents may have can be easily prevented through parents-adolescent conversation, and problems that have already arisen can be resolved more easily.

When your adolescent is heartbroken or if an adolescent child wants to talk to your parents right away for any emergency problem, you should do so soon.

Of course, you can have a conversation at a mutually agreed time depending on the situation.

The relationship between parents and children who do not have productive and sound conversations can be said to be scary, sad, and pitiful.

If parents and children share thoughts and feelings through conversation, many problems can be prevented in advance so that negative aspects do not arise in their children’s lives, and the positive aspects in their lives can be further strengthened.

If parents treat their children as their own, and talk and raise them in a one-way authoritarian way, without showing true unconditional love for their children, the child will not listen to his parents well and when he is young, he may listen well but when he grew up in puberty when he goes to college or lives in social life, he may become to be passive, weakened, lonely in his relationships with his peers and friends.

No parent would want to have their children like this.

Even if their children are very young, they know whether their parents’ words and actions are correct or fair, and they know whether they are willing to say things that parents cannot carry out.

Children know whether their parents truly love unconditionally, are overly or generous, or treat themselves as fairly as they would with other siblings. During the conversation, never say negative, despised, or ridiculing words to your child, such as “Hey, you idiot” or “That idiot.”

There are no perfect parents and no perfect children in this world.

If a parent makes a mistake during a conversation, don’t make excuses and glorify the mistake, but you should immediately apologize to your child.

It is normal to be angry.

Anyone gets angry.

The question is how to get angry.

When parents talk inappropriately with their anger, they don’t feel to start or continue the conversation.

They can’t take their parents’ instructions or orders properly and can’t continue the conversation.

In particular, parents should try to keep away from getting angry.

You should apologize to your children even when you are irrationally angry. Children are independent human beings and should not be treated as if they were owned by their parents.

Children who have been trained and raised through genuine, unconditional love, productive and wholesome parent-child conversations under harmonious parents, drugs, alcohol, smoking, crime, teenage pregnancy, depression, rebellion against authoritarians, run away, join gangs, will not get involved in your back and will grow up to be a great adult.

Healthy parent-child dialogue is food.

 

16. Parenting with unconditional love and care for their child(5)……………………75

 

Photo 16.The children receive the more true love from their parents, the better. Children who receive such love are happier and more confident. Whatever they do, they do their best and live with sound healthy self-esteem and pride. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

There is no parents who give a stone to their children when they were asked for the bread.

If children ask for fish, parents will not give vipers to their children.

Of course not.

Parents will give their children nutritious and delicious bread and fruit and will give enough fish to their children.

Parents truly love and nurture their children.

Our parents love and raise their children a lot.

However, most children do not feel they are raised and loved enough by their parents.

Why is that so?

Parents think that they love and raise their children, but almost all parents do not know how to properly convey their love for their children.

Why is that so?

Parents love their children, but they do not know how to convey their love for their children to them.

That is why, unfortunately, many children do not feel that they are loved enough by their parents.

In addition, It was taught to raise your children with strict discipline.

“You have to train your children through corporal punishment, so they can get well trained.” Highly educated. At school, teachers taught students severely and unilaterally.

Neither at school nor at home regularly taught them how to properly love their children or how to properly raise them.

Most young people marry without learning how to love their children properly.

And they give birth to and raise children.

They haven’t learned that their children are at the forefront priorityof their lives.

No matter where in the world they live, many parents today have this problems.

Photo 17. Children who grow up with full and unconditional true love, themselves know how to love others, feel comfortable and sincere, they do their best, and grow up happily. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

Photo 18. Children who grow up with full unconditional true love life with a wholesome and rich sense of pride. Whatever they see, they see right, whatever the hear, hear right, think right about anything, and act right. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Dear parents!

Parents, do you know what questions their growing children often ask to their parents?

“Do you love me?”

Do you love me?

They repeat this question again again.

“Do you love me?”

They ask the same question over and over again and again.

Mom and dad!

Do you love me?

Do you truly love me without condition?

“Do you really love me?”

“Please love me unconditionally?

Mom and Dad show me, unconditional true love?”

Mom and Dad!

Please love me with a eye contact love?

How much did you love me with eye contact love?

Mom and dad!

How many times have you hugged me, how much lifted me, stroked me, touched me, and raised me in love?

Mom, dad, me, honor, wealth, work, money. What is your first priority in your life?

How many priority do my mom and dad have before me?

Am I at first in mom and dad’s life priorities?

Is it in the second?

Or is it in the third?

I want to know.

Am I the next priority after mom or dad?

After mom, dad, honor, fortune, am I in your priority?

So, are you saying that mom and dad put wealth more than me, honor more than me, and companies more important than me?

Then I am anxious.

I have heartache.

I am not happy.

Mom and dad!

Have you ever thought of me as the most important person or the most important child in the world in  your lives?

Mom and dad!

While living in this extremely active world, Mom and dad take time to bringe me alone to go somewhere, I think that I am the most precious and important child in the world, and do you love me with focused attensive love and care of me, and we both spend  for at least a few hours or a few days. Have you ever spent time with your mother or your dad?

In this busy world, how many times have you put everything aside and took one of your children alone to go somewhere to entertain him or her, give him or her so much focused attention love and care, and take care of your child?

Please answer to me?

Mom and dad!

Havw mom and dad ever raised me like your property?

Did you know that I am an independent human being in this world.

Although I am small and young, do you respect and nurture me as an independent human being?

Mom and dad!

Do you know what love means?

Did you know that “warm behavior and heart for caring for others” is love?

Nevertheless, have you ever raised me by possessing me  and you love me as if you own me, have you ever loveed me through role reversal way, and have you ever loved me seductively?

Mom and dad!

Have you ever loved me conditionally?

No matter how hard you try, I can’t achieve the first ranking in school, but you promise that you’ll buy my favorite violin only when I take first place, where to spend, and do you know that such love and parenting are conditional love?

What should I do when I receive conditional love from you?

Will I treat you, my mom and dad conditionally just like the conditional love that you mom and dad do for me?

Mom and dad!

Did you know that I am anxious when I do at my best but I don’t meet my mom and dad’s expectations?

Mom and dad!

Do you know what is unconditional love?

Mom and dad!

Do you know what is true love without conditions?

Like the unconditional love in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, do you love me and raise me?

Such love is perfect love.

Have you ever loved me so close to it, even if you can’t necessarily give it such a perfect love?

Whether I’m tall or short, fat or slim, ugly or handsome and pretty, crippled or not, whether I’m immature and my actions are right. Whether Mom and Dad likes or not, whether I’m smart or stupid, dull or witty, Do you love me regardless of the conditions?

During the 2008 U.S. presidential race. vice-presidential candidate, Alaska Governor Farin showed to the people of the United States and all over the world that after the vice president candidate, she hugged her eight-month-old Down syndrome son with one arm and gave unconditional love for him.

Mom and dad!

Whether or not I can grow up to be a famous athlete in the world, Whether my business is well and become a millionaire, are you unconditionally loving me, whether I am a daughter or a son?

When I was born with Down syndrome, can you love and raise me without condition?

Can you proudly present me to this world, saying that I am a stupid child of mom and dad?

Mom and dad!

Are you loving me without condition?

That doesn’t mean that my mom and dad should just go over what I do or say wrong.

If you truly love me without conditions, you must correct me if I did wrongdoings with love.

Mom and dad!

I really know it’s not easy to be a parents.

My mom and dad love me without condition and raise me, give me the strength to live happily, securely, and peacefully, make it easy to get along with my friends, give me the strength to treat people well, and do my best to live in this world. Did you know that you are giving me the power to let go?

Mom and dad!

Have you ever wonder what kind of love I received from  mom and dad when I grew up?

Mom and dad!

Did you know that only when I receive true unconditional love through your eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love and care, your children can become the best, do their best, and work well in parenting training ?

Do you know what can be to live with healthy self-esteemand and sound pride?

Mom and dad!

Do you know that you have a duty to love your children by that way, and that children  have the right to receive that love?

Mom and dad!

Did you know that training is to train your children to walk the path they deserve through examples, admonitions, words, requests, and writings?

Do you know the meaning of training?

Did you know that it is training to lead your children with love so that they can think right and do right so that they can become productive members of society who know how to govern themselves?

Mom and dad!

Did you know that training should be done with love?

Still, why are they trained through corporal punishment?

Mom and dad!

Do you know that some parents rationalize their mistakes before their younger children?

Did you know that there are no perfect people in the world, no perfect children, and also no perfect parents?

Do mom and dad know how important it is to apologize when parents do wrong to their children?

Still, did you know that some parents use the word “love sticks” to punish their children with love sticks?

Did you know that corporal punishment is corporal punishment and love is love?

Mom and dad!

I am still growing one day by one day and am still a child.

Because I’m still a young immature child, I behave like a young immature child, but as I gradually grow up and become an adult

 

Photo 19. If you truly love me unconditionally, even if I have such a mess around the house, I can grow up judging well and acting maturely. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

Picture 20. Even if I can’t eat cleanly and quietly like adults, if you love and raise me without condition, I will eat politely and quietly. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

Photo 22. Even if you play with kitchen utensils like a naughty boy, if I grow up, I will behave maturely and talk and play maturely. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD.,FAAP

Photo 21. Even if I play with a doghouse like a naughty boy, if you truly love me without conditions, I will grow up and behave maturely. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 24. Training should not be done as suit as possible. In particular, he is trained through corporal punishment often, It leads to insults, sometimes rebellion, and negative consequences, even if he is young. To love your children sincerely and unconditionally does not mean to love the every wrong they have made. Don’t just ignore the wrongdoing of your children. Copyright © 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

Photo 23. Training is done with love. When training with love, you must first ask him to do this, and if he or she does not respond, you must consider whether the training is appropriate for the child. In the meantime, parents should think about whether he has been  truly loved, raised, and trained with uncondition. Parents should reevaluate he is ok for mentally, physically, economically, and spiritually. If a parent himself or herself has done something wrong, parents should accept the fact, should not hesitate to tell your child that you have done wrong. and love and train them without condition. And if the petition is not appropriate, it must be changed and trained accordingly. Copyright 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MDP, FAA

ⓒ

Picture 25. Children who grow up receiving enough true unconditional love and then they know how to love others with an abundance of sound self-esteem and pride. and always feel comfortable and secure. Copyright © 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

Photo 26. Prince Edward Island Ferry lighthouse in Canada to Nova Scotia, US.

Like a lighthouse to help rhe sailor how to navigate safely in the ocean in a dark-black night, unconditional love illuminates parents with the way to raise their children rightly. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Mom and dad!

When you do training me wth love to have nice behave and speak the right way, you give me the first plea, and if I receive the right plead and I do not comply, please check whether I am hungry, sick, incapable of carrying out your plea, whether your plea is inappropriate at the time or place, etc. I would like to ask if you would like to re-evaluate it.

Mom and dad!

Are you filling my love tank sufficiently with unconditional true love?

Did you know that only doing so will give me more nutrients and energy in my life, so I am better prepared to work on my mom and dad’s training?

When children grow up, parenrs train their children by filling their love tanks enough with the focused attention love and eye contact love and physical contact with true love, That is essential for growing children and becomes energy and nourishment in life.

Did you know that all children have love tanks in the heart? When their love tanks become to be filled fully and parents don’t need to train them on command or train them as punishment.

Mom and dad!

Did you know that children are born with 9 different temperaments from birth?

Each child grows up with a unique temperament according to the level of the nine natural temperaments. It is important for parents to raise their children while respecting each child’s innate temperament.

Did you know that there are some children who are difficult to raise because of their natural temperament, no matter how well they train and try to raise them well while growing up?

Mom and dad!

If a children who are mature enough to fulfill their parents’ request and have the ability to fulfill the parental request,  children do not accept the parental training request when it is given an appropriate request during training, parents  may be sternly ordered to do so and will comply with the order. Did you know that if they don’t comply, then you can train it as a punishment or the behavior modification training method?

Mom and dad!

When you are punishing children, did you know that the amount and method of punishment must be different depending on the child’s age and situation?

For example, if a 6-year-old child does not comply with the parent’s orders, a time-out may be a good punish method. Staying alone in the room for about 6 minutes is appropriate for that age, and also a punishment for not watching TV for a day or two, or a day or two with a friend is appropriate. And you can punish them by preventing them from playing together.

Mom and dad!

If you give your children  a lot of unconditional true love, there is no need to punish them. Did you know that they can behave well on their own and be good at parents’ training?

Mom and dad!

Did you know that corporal punishment once received is a training method that is irreversible and can damage the relationship between parents and children, and that the consequences of corporal punishment are bad. And it is a training method that should not be used to raise children through corporal punishment?

Did you know you shouldn’t train with corporal punishment?

Mom and dad.

Did you know that your children are younger, the easier it is to communicate with them if parents properly give them more physical contact love and eye contact love, and children are better able to follow parental training and also parents can raise them more easily?

Some people say that they will become spoiled children if they are more nurtured with physical contact love, such as holding child more, touching them with warm hands, kissing their cheeks, and others.  Some people think that children should not be raised in such way.

That’s not right.

Did you know that it is not wrong to raise your children with proper eye contact love, physical contact, etc?

If you raise a child without saying, “I love you,” neither hugging nor kissing, the child will not know if their parents really love him, and if trained in corporal punishment, they will become anxious and desperate children.

Children who are not well-loved and trained will rebel against every request and every order of their parents.

Let’s raise our children with true unconditional love.

Dear parents!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

The following is an example of the internet pediatric and adolescent health counseling question and answer on “Unconditional Love and focused attention Love”.

Q & A. Unconditional love with focused attention love

Q.This is about an 11-year-old girl.

I have three daughters. The eldest child is 11 years old, the second is 9 years old, and the youngest is about 9 months old.

However, I am very worried about my oldest child, so I am writing like this.

The her personality is not very active. However, I don’t think she has not been bullied in school. Sometimes friends come to play and talk about close friends. Before, she attended an art academy, and from the fourth grade, she went to a private piano academy. And  she attended such an academy because they wanted to do it.

The she is dexterous, but she is good at folding papers and making funny toys. She played the piano well and  the progress was so fast.

But her activity is too slow. It wasn’t due to on purpose, it was originally. Everything is not fast, and I have to ask her to write a diary. She promised me she would do it by herself and then she would do it.

 She does not have proper toilet training. It’s been a while since she was in the 3rd grade. She used to hold urination for long time and then she did not get to the bathroom, but she got it on her underwear pant and It was bad smell. I tried scolding, and I said it would cause illness, but sometimes I tried leaving it alone, but it didn’t work much. The bathroom at home is conventional, but the school is flush. Even at home, she goes only when she was in a hurry, so sometimes she can’t move around because it’s too urgent. What should I do? Should I go to the hospital to see the doctor and get a consultation?

It’s not that she can’t have a toilet. she did like to go for a pee, so should I have to wait. To me, I am so worried that it has become a habit to be patient. Isn’t that the usual slow and self-doing personality? When I talk, it seems like I go to the bathroom properly for a day or two. When she was a baby, I never scolded her for urine problems, did I cause her problems. I trained her bowel movements after her second birthday and she did bowel movement toilet training in two weeks. You must be busy, but please give me a good word for this ignorant mother.

If you cannot help me, but if I have to go to the hospital, please tell me where to go.

If not, please name one of the Pediatric Psychiatric clinic in Seoul, so I would really appreciate it if you could say anything.

Thank you for reading this long article and be healthy. Thank you.

A. To Dear mom

Hello. Thanks for the great question.

The more information you know about your child’s age, gender, past medical history, family medical history, medical examination findings, clinical examination, etc., the more helpful it is to give you an answer. I will respond based on the information you provided.

I am sorry for you have been suffering from her problem.

It would be nice to know more about your child’s growth and development, know her past medical history, a medical examination finding and any clinical lab tests.

How about doing something like this.

Go to the  Pediatric clinics nearby and tell them everthings what you told me, and ask for a head-to-toe physical examination to find whether there are any abnormalities in her body.

When physicians do regular health check-ups for girls, boys, or adolescent boys and phsycians usually give also an external genital examination. Therefore, your child’s pediatrician will also properly examine your child’s external genitalia. Also, she must have a total physical examination. If necessary, she should also have an anal examination.

And do the following clinical lab tests.

If  any girls have symptoms such as your child’s symptoms, it is better to have the lab test result for a urinary tract infection.

In addition, constipation can also cause such symptoms which you child has.

With a urine chemistry test, you can easily find in in 5 minutes the result whether she may have pyuria, hematuria, or bacteriuria in her urine.

These tests can be easily done at the local pediatric clinic, and also parents too can do the tests at home.

Also, to find out if she have a urinary tract infection, ask her doctor to do a urine gram stain, microscopic bacteriological test, and urine bacterial culture test.

If the test results are normal, her doctor may assume that such signs and symptoms is most likely not due to urination problems or urinary tract infection problems.

She should also have a CBC blood test to see if she may have anemia and other problems.

If any any children with hypothyroidism may behave somewhat slower.

So ask for a thyroid function test to find thyroid problem status.

Sometimes two ureters come out from one kidney and one of them connects to the urethra below the bladder. In some cases of double ureter malformations, the end of one of the three ureters may open into the vaginal cavity.

Children with this deformity can have the urine little by little at all times.

Ask for a detailed examination of the external genital organs to see if there is such an abnormality.

Also, the her mother lit a lamp to find out if there is any abnormality at the entrance to the external urethra or vaginal orifice of your daughter’s  external genitalia, and see if urine contineoesly to come out one drop by drops.

If you suspect that she has a urinary tract infection or any congenital malformation of the urinary tract, such as a double ureter, try an ultrasound examination of the kidney, the ureter, and the bladder and urethra.

If the results of all of the above tests are normal, you should suspect that your child may have a mental problem.

If she has a mental problem, it is advisable to seek a referral from a her regular pediatrician and see a pediatric psychiatrist.

There are the adolescents who do have bedwet problem and soiling even if  there is no physical abnormality and also they may have the urinary incontinence in the day and night.

Since such kind of poblems may come unconsciously, parents should not punish children who has such a problem.

I can helpl you a few things, so please accept it.

Whether there is a mental problem or not, have her father takes her to either the theater, to the park, or  to a restaurant, or they may go on a trip. Her father make her to be the most important loving child in the world.

This kind of  love is called focused attention love and care.

It takes a lot of time to give this focused attention love.

Time is money. If parents spend money to love their children, it’s worth it.

Not only that, during this kind of love given to their children, the children will appreciate that parents love them this way, and children too will love parents and respect them and sometimes parents treat their children like their friends.

At this time, the child will tell her father about the stress, suffering, and conflict that she had deeply held in her heart. At the the beginning, she may speak carefully. In the times passing by, she will be able to say everythings kept in her heart.

This is what our parents want.

You have the opportunity to seriously engage in conversations between you and your children while you are giving focused attention love. Focused attention love and care is one kind of the most sincere ways to love your children.

At this point, you may be able to find out why such symptoms are occurring and the cause. Sometimes, instead of a dad, a mom can do the same for focused attention love and care.

We know that just as parents give our children the best food, so children want to do their best.

Please re-evaluate whether you truly loved your child with eye contact love and physical contact love unconditionally, whether you gave love training, and whether training through corporal punishment.

If you have more questions, please contact me again.

Thank you.

Lee Sang-won, MD

17. The eye contact love for your children…89

Photo 27. A newborn baby is loved by her mother’s eye contact, and he gives back his own eye contact love. Source- Mead Johnson Nutritionals, USA, and Pediatric Home Nursing Encyclopedia.

There are sayings in Korea, “One man’s eyes contact love fits to onee woman’s  eyes contact love and then they ran away to love each other forever”.

These words can be expressed in terms of eye contact love.

There is also a saying, an eye contact love.

It can be expressed as “eye fit contact love”, vision line contact love, eye vision contact love, eye smile love, or “eye contact love” in Korea.

In relationships between parents and children, between couples, between friends, or between loved ones, we always use our gaze to give and receive eye contact love. In other words, it uses eye contact love.

In particular, they use glances when communicating with each other through conversation.

They use eye contact a lot without knowing it in the everyday life.

In addition, in all other human relationships, eye contact is often used without knowing it.

In particular, parents can use eye contact when training their children with love, and during parenting, parents use eye contact to convey unconditional true love to their children.

Parents use eye contact to properly train their children and live their daily lives by using eye contact as a means of communicating emotions and/or sorrows to them.

During daily life like this, they often use eye contact between parents and children, or between parents and children without knowing.

Especially, when parents communicate with their children through conversation, they often use eye contact.

After the baby is born, the mother looks at the newborn baby from the head to the toe with a lovely glance.

From this point on, the newborn baby opens his eyes widely and begins to receive eye contact love from his mother and his father.

The baby receives the love from the mother’s eyes and puts it in her or his love tank in his or her heart.

At that time, the mother’s first glance contact love is used as nourishment and vitality for his life.

Nevertheless, there are many parents who are not sure how important their eye contact love is. In this way, the mother and the infant are exchanged without knowing the love of eye contact.

In other words, this is how eye contact love between parents and children begins and continues.

Take a close look at the babies feeding your breast milk.

At that time, you can learn a lot about how to give and receive love between the mother and her child, which cannot be found in the medical literature.

In order to receive the mother’s eye contact love, in addition to breastfeeding, the breastfeeding baby gets the mother’s eye contact love.

Photo 28. While the mother feeds her baby with her breast milk, the baby receives eye contact love from her mother and the mother receives eye contact love from her baby. As the mother and her daughter exchange love through eye contact, the love bonding between the mother and her daughter is firmly formed. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 29. A mother loves her baby through eye contact while breastfeeding.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAA

Breastfeeding babies, of course, suck on their mother’s milk and grow and develop with the nutrients from that breast milk. Other than that, the mother’s eye contact loves received through the mother’s gaze, the physical contact love received from the her or his mother while sucking the nipple while being held by the mother and in contact with the mother’s warm body. Love is more than the nutrients obtained from breast milk feeding.

During this lactation, when the oxytocin hormone is secreted from the posterior lobe of the mother’s pituitary gland, the oxytocin hormone stimulates the mother breast milk ducts and sacs in her mother breast to make breast milk secreted from the inside of the breast toward the nipples and at the same times, the postpartum uterus can be contracted by the pitocin hormone action while the breastfeeding baby.

That is why the oxytocin(oxytocin) hormone is called the love hormone. The oxytocin hormone contracts the secretion of breast milk so that the milk comes out well, and the uterus contracts after delivery. Without breastfeeding, the secretion of the oxytocin hormone is not smooth.

The baby feeding the mother’s milk receives enough eye contact love and physical contact love from her or his mother and the baby puts that love in his or her love tank.

There are more nutrients in that love more than just the total calories and nutrients from mother’s breast milk.

For this reason, breastfeeding mothers are happier and mother’s breastfeeding babies are healthier, better-grown, and happier.

I’ve read an article like this.

One of the professors at the medical school asked medical college students what are the benefits of breastfeeding. It is said that there was an answer like this: “Breast milk is a natural diet”. The temperature of the breast milk is suitable and constant for the baby to eat. Breasts is the most beautiful bowls in the world, and it is so good that the bowls can not be crushed or broken no matter how much you rub it”.

All of the above answers are correct and plausible. I wish there were more answers.

The best advantage of breastfeeding is that it can fully convey the mother’s eye contact love and the mother’s physical contact love to the baby during breastfeeding, and the baby breastmilk fed  feels that she or he is receiving true unconditional love from the mother.

A nursing baby doesn’t have much.

Nevertheless, the baby stores the love which the baby receives from its mother in her love tank.

During breastfeeding, the baby stores the love he receives from his mother in his love tank.

The eye contact love and physical contact love stored in his love tank are returned to his mother while feeding.

Without eye contact love and physical contact love received from their mother, there is no love to return to his mother.

During breastfeeding, the love bonding between his mother and her baby is well-formed more firmly.

What other means other than this parenting method can be used to firmly form the bonding of love between one mother and one child.

It would have been better if the answer, “A love bonding between one mother and one child is formed during breastfeeding,” would be the best answer from medical students for the professor’s question.

In many cases today, there is a loose bonding of love between parents and children. Sometimes the love bonding is not formed at all.

There are many reasons, but the author thinks that the most important reason is that the mother does not breastfeed her baby. I also thought that it came from raising children without feeding for an appropriate period of time. The reason may be that the baby was not properly bonded with love between the mother and the child when the baby was born.

“How to really love your child” and “How to really love your teenager” by a pediatric psychiatrist, Dr. Ross Campbell is my favorite parenting guides.

In his books, he said that “all children are born with emotional love tanks that can store love and emotions received from their parents”.

The author would like to express it as a love tank instead of an emotion tank. The word emotion tank or love tank is a very important word for parents who love and raise their children to know.

The author confesses that I am writing this article using lot of the words I have learned from Dr. Campbell’s two books.

During many parents’s daily life, while raising their children, parents often use it unknowingly when filling up their children’s love tanks or communicating with their children. They also use physical contact love and fucuse attention  love a lot without knowing it.

Many parents, including authors and people in my family, are unaware of how important good eye contact love is while raising children.

Also, we don’t even know how good or bad a child’s eye contact can affect a child’s level of happiness and stability, and success.

And the way a child makes eye contact when dealing with other people and in what form it strongly affects his life in many ways.

In other words, when parents and children exchange affection, sympathy, and love with each other, they communicate with smiley eye contact and communicate with each other through good eye contact in order to communicate through conversation.

In this way, eye contact love strongly affects each person’s life positively or negatively.

There is a saying that ” the two of us love each other because the eyes met well.”

Unfortunately, some parents use physical language as a means of nonverbal communication when conveying negative emotions such as anger, hatred, or anger to their children.

When communicating, we use eye contact as the physical language.

Not only that, but teachers with better eye contact are more popular with students and teach more effectively with better eye contact.

Photo 31. Dad talks while loving the newborn baby with good eye contact.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 30. Grandmother and grandfather also take care of grandson and granddaughters by giving their eye contact love, physical contact love, and focused attention love, and care to grandchildren.

In this complex and turbulent society, when experienced and wise grandparents give their grandchildren unconditional love and care, their grand children will grow happier and more stable.

 The grandmother.  I love you very much!. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD.,

FAAPUnknowingly, people use eye contact as a means to communicate negative emotions such as anger, hatred, and anger to others. As such, it is a big mistake to use eye contact as a negative means.

Parents should give their children a lot of good eye contact love as a means of delivering true unconditional love to their children.

 It would be good to find out how good each other’s eye contact is in a marital relationship.

Children naturally follow the more loving of the two parents with better eye contact.

In addition, there is no doubt that the students follow the teachers who teach disciples with good eye contact among the various teachers, and that the students prefer such teachers.

Even at work, it’s easy to understand that you like your bosses or colleagues who have better eye contact.

 It is very important to take the time deliberately to teach your children to grow up and develop and treat them with bright, intelligent, smiling, and loving eye contact when dealing with the other person during their daily life.

Parents are obligated to teach their children how to do the friend eye contact, at least once or twice.

In fact, you should continue to teach your children how to use eye contact love until they make sure they have good eye contact.

 It teaches us that the habit of treating someone with good eye contact and smiling faces is the key to determining success.

Photo 32. Children with good eye contact are popular. Others like them. Have more of a wholesome healthy pride. It also teaches us that the habit of treating someone with good eye contact and smiling faces can determine success.

 Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 33. Children with good eye contact are popular and others like them more. Have more of healthy self-esteem.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Some children have good eye contact from birth, but if there are children who do not have good eye contact, teach them how to do a lot of practice to stand in front of the mirror.

One of the things such as economically, socially, and politically successful people have in common is good eye contact.

Still, many parents do not teach their children how to have good eye contact and how to use it properly.

In the meantime, I have had several seminars with parents in Korea, my home country, about eye contact love, but Korean parents who attended the seminar did not seem to be interested in the subject of eye contact love.

I even heard that it was not polite to look up straight at others.

From birth to newborn, infancy, school age, adolescence, and to adulthood, children who grow up with a lot of good eye contact love, and good glances from their parents maintain a productive and energetic life with a stable, peaceful, sound self-esteem.

Better eye contact, the more love they receive, the more they receive and grow up, the more popular and desirable children of their age, adults, or others.

After becoming an adult, even when living in social life, they have more pride in being amicable, positive, healthy, and healthy.

Let me give you a good example of eye contact.

I raised  one daughter and two sons. The second son graduated with majoring in Chemistry in Yupen and took an interview for admission to Connecticut Medical School.

While taking the interview, he turned his gaze down the whole way and was notified of the disqualification. After that, he and I learned how to make good use of eye contact, He took the interview again, and then received a passing notice.

During 30 years of pediatric pacactice, some children were brought to my pediatric clinic from birth until they graduated from college.

I also taught them how to make good eye contact.

We can now see how important it is for our children to have good eye contact, physical contact love, and nurture them properly.

Good eye contact, how to love, how to do a lot, teach your children how to treat others with good eye contact, and teach your children how to receive good eye contact from others. The eye contact of successful people in this world gives comfort uniformly.

Those who gave good eye contact unforgettable and always remain in their minds and yearn.

If you love your children with a lot of good eye contact love, your children will be well communicated to them

Photo 34. Eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love, and training with love give children plenty of true unconditional love and fill their love tank, and they will be happy and do their best no matter what they do and have a healthy self-esteem and sound pride.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Because of this, the eye contact love obtained from parents is stored in their love tank and reflected to parents as they were received and reflected to others.

As much as the parents did, and in the way they did, eye contact love returns to the parents.

As much as the eye contact love that the society gave to young children and the way they did, the eye contact love of the youths given by society returns to that society.

If you give your children unconditional love through eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love and care, and love training and fill their love tank, they will be happy and do their best no matter what they do, and they will have healthy self-esteem.

Parents will provide their children with shelters, clothes, food, health care, and well-education, and fill their children’s love tanks with true, unconditional love without deficiencies in these four aspects, the reward will be unimaginable.

18. Physical contact love for your child……97

Photo 35. My Dad loves me with his eye contact love and physical contact love.

 The newborn baby holds the dad’s finger tightly, and the baby and his dad are enjoying the physical contact love with each other. The love bonding between his father and his child is firmly formed. He gives a lot of love like this. Still, there are cases where the baby is delivered in the hospital delivery room and the baby is not taken to the sweet home where the father is.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Picture 36. His Dad hugs a newborn baby. Through such physical contact love, the father and the baby are receiving mutual love thru physical contact love. The love bonding between his father and his  baby will continue until the distant future. Dad did you hug me a lot?.  When asked, the answer must be yes. You need to know a lot so you can answer. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Picture 37. The papa hugs the his baby and loves him through physical contact.

Through this physical contact love, a love bonding between the father and the child son is formed. If possible, I would recomend  all fathers to make a love bonding with their newborn baby at the delivery room. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Picture 38. A newborn baby’s hand resembles his father’s hand a lot. My father loves me through his physical contact. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Picture 39. A newborn baby’s legs and feet resemble his father’s legs and feet a lot.

My father loves me through physical contact love.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Parents use his appropriate physical contact love as a means of conveying his unconditional true love to their children.

In addition, parents use their eye-contact love, and focused attention love, and care to more effectively and fully convey their love to their children.

Children who grow up without receiving any physical contact love, eye contact love, and focused attention love are difficult to survive in this world.

Parents’ love-motherhood or fatherhood love is not passed on to their children. Also, children cannot fully grow or develop. Physical contact love is essential to raising children. And it is a necessity for children’s lives.

True unconditional love is a basic essential condition of raising children. In addition, if you love your children a lot through these three means of parental love, they will grow up happily, have sound healthy self-esteem and pride, and do their best whatever you do.

Unfortunately, many parents are simply raising their children without knowing whether physical contact love, eye contact love, and focused attention love and caring are essential conditions for raising their children.

It is very important for parents to make proper physical contact with their children so that they can communicate parental love to their children.

Parents’ love for their children is strongly transmitted to their children when they truly love their children unconditionally while loving them with appropriate physical contact.

If they do not receive physical contact love, children will not be able to grow, develop, and wither and die.

Birds, as well as all warm-blood animals in the world, must receive proper physical contact love from their mothers in order to survive.

Seeing that even many kinds of insects come together and live in contact with each other, it seems that they must have physical contact love in order for them to survive.

In order to give appropriate physical contact love to children, physical contact love can be planned, or proper physical contact can be made naturally, such as placing a hand on the child’s shoulder or hugging the child during daily life, so that true unconditional love can be given to children.

When you love your child through physical contact, you should do it appropriately and naturally.

In particular, it is very important to do it appropriately and naturally when giving love to school-age children or adolescent children through physical contact just before puberty begins.

Parents’ proper physical contact love is essential for them to grow up mentally, physically, healthy, and happy with sound healthy self-esteem.

 Photo 40. A newborn baby is holding her mother’s finger tightly and is giving each other love for physical contact love. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 Picture 41 An infant holds her mother’s finger tightly and is making physical contact with each other. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 42. An infant is holding her mother’s finger and making physical contact lovewith each other. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 Photo 43. The newborn baby is holding the his mother’s finger tightly and is loving with physical contact love. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 44. Hand physical contact love. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 45. Physical contact love between his mother and her child. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Physical contact love can be given to others when you are appropriately and naturally contact with a part of the body of another person while wearing clothes or a part of the body such as hands, feet, shoulders, the trunk or the face, etc. The word of child love here does not mean a heterosexual relationship love.

Instead of the word physical contact love, the words hand touch love are also used.

 Or, in Korea these days, the term “skinship” instead of the word physical contact love is used.

Although I don’t know who made the word “skinship”, it is neither English nor Korean. If translated into an obsolete language, it seems to mean “shallow superficial skin contact”.

Please don’t use this phrase, please.

On the contrary, the word physical contact love means not only warm skin contact love but also love that is transmitted to every single cell of the body.

In fact, unknowingly in our human society, parents and children love each other, friends love friends, and the male or the female opposite sexes exchange love through physical contact.

Nevertheless, in many cases, we are not well aware that we are living in such physical contact.

By the physical contact between parents and children they can exchang love, and human emotions and sorrows, and they communicate each other through affection, sympathy, love, welcome, joy, greetings,  and also through appropriate natural physical contact between siblings, friends, and guests.

Physical contact love between couples or between opposite sexes differs from physical contact love in the parenting of children.

When caresses, hugs, and love-making between a couple or the opposite sex are naturally fun and appropriate, they are mentally and physically healthier, tensions are easier to relax, stress is relieved, a sense of stability, fears disappear, affection, sympathy, and affection for each other. There is more kindness.

As a means of conveying love between couples and strengthening their love, they do a lot of physical contact love unconsciously and consciously.

“Most Europeans have more appropriate physical contact, such as hugs or handshakes between their favorite friends. Americans are said to live by socializing and sharing emotions with less appropriate physical contact than they do. (Source: Loving Each Other, Dr. Leo Buscaglia).

How should we look at the Korean-style child-rearing method, which is based on Confucian thoughts, and raises children with physical contact love?

Not only they did not receive education on how to raise children, such as hugs, kisses, touchings, etc., and also they thought that it was not good to love children through physical contact, but parents used to raise their children based on the strict Confucian ethical morality such as  “after 7 years old the male and the female should not sit together”.

In other words, “Don’t look up straight with an adult or other partner into the conversation “

So, there was no way to show one’s intelligent and compassionate gaze to the other person, and there was no way to receive eye contact with the other’s gaze.

This education was based on the beautiful Eastern notion of morality. There are many good parenting methods in the classical Eastern way of raising children.

There are also many good things about the scientific, sound, and traditional Western way of raising children. Now we are living in a cyber world.

I think that it is good to raise our children according to the best child-rearing method for our children by taking the good points from the classical method of raising children in the East and the good method of raising children in the classical method of raising children in the West.

Photo 46. As the fetus in the mom’s woom plays to kick his mother’s abdominal wall with his feet and pushes it with her head to have physical contact love, receiving the love of the mother’s physical contact and conveying her love to the mother. Copyright © 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD ., FAAP

Photo 47. The husband touches pregnant wife’S the belly  and puts his ear to hear the baby in her ely. He says “I love you and  I am waiting for you to be born into this world”. Dad unknowingly loves the baby in his wife’s stomach through eye contact, physical contact. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

If you make a mistake in loving your children through physical contact, you can be mistaken for incest, homosexuality, adultery, sexual violence, or child sexual abuse.

There are cases in court that an unknown adult naturally makes appropriate physical contact to the child and has committed sexual abuse of children (sexual pediatric abuse).

Rational emotions can arise in parents when parents give appropriate and natural physical contact love to their children.

Their parents specially give appropriate and natural physical contact to their adolescent children. Some of heterosexual feeling may be developed naturally when parents give natural phycal contact to their adolescent child.

For this reason, even some parents are reluctant to give to their children proper natural physical contact.

Such parenting loves are the wrong idea.

But, unfortunately, some parents give seductive love to their children. This is a very miserable parent-child relationship.

In addition, when it has to be very caeful to make inappropriet physical contact with your relatives or friends who have not seen each other for long time, especially when they kindly shake hands or hug each other and kiss each other on the cheek. This kind of hysical contact in fact, must be careful . Sometimes all we have to be caeful.

In some cases, when they greet each other,  by saying, “Do not touch my body.”

It is also common to see a scene where good friends , parents or siblings bow their heads to each other, standing silently with their arms folded and looking at each other with unpleasant emotional glances.

Some argues that it is most beautiful greetin methods to nod or bow down without kissing other cheek or shaking the hand for the prevention of infection.

Teachers at school often help students to set their physical direction in which they should go by making physical contact  as needed, or when they.

All of this is truly unfortunate for all of us.

As the fetus plays in the mother’s womb, she kicks, hits, and pushes the mother’s abdominal wall with her feet, receives physical contact lo ve from the mother, and conveys her love of physical contact to the mother.

Dad touches the pregnant wife’s belly, puts his ears on the pregnant wife’s belly, kisses her belly with his mouth, and says to the baby in her belly, “I love you and I am waiting for you.”

Dad unknowingly loves the his baby in her stomach through an eye contact, physical contact, and words.

Photo 48. Newborn baby’s head and mother’s hand. This is also a kind of physical contact love.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 49. You can list a lot about the medical benefits of breastfeeding. However, among the breastfeeding described here, the best advantage of breastfeeding is that the baby receives physical contact love from the heror his mother and also the mother also receives physical contact love from the baby. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

As soon as the baby is born, the dad hugs the blood-red baby and loves him with physical contact love. The first love bonding between parents and the child. In addition, he loves the newborn baby through the eye contact, observing each eye, the nose, and the ear.

In the cesarean section delivery room, we often see a scene where a newborn baby is held and loved by his mother and  his father in the cesarean section.

I feel endless beauty when I see a mother who is delivered by a cesarean section and loves her baby by touching her newborn baby with a pale, trembling hand, holding her baby in her chest with her eye contact love, and loving her through physical contact love.

The beautiful fatherhood and motherhood that can be seen in the process of childbirth during pregnancy and childbirth are very noble.

This is where the love bonding between parents and children begins to form firmly.

Once, a woman I met on the street gave me a big hug and said “Thank you.”

The woman delighted me by saying, “When I gave birth to Anita from a cesarean section room, you was a good doctor who put my blood-red newborn daughter on my fore chest on the operating table and dragged my hand to touch and hug Anita.”

While breastfeeding, the infant boy sucks the mother’s nipples in his mouths, and the baby rubs his face against the mother’s breasts and his mother embraces him in the his mother’s arms, receiving love for physical contact from the his mother.

In addition, unknowingly, the mother is soaked in the love of physical contact from the nursing baby.

As a nursing mother, “I have joy, satisfaction, and confidence in being able to nurture my child by feeding my breasts.”

While breastfeeding, the mother also receives the physical contact love from the nursing baby and relieves the physical and mental fatigue and stress caused by pregnancy and childbirth as a mother.Postpartum physical changes caused by pregnancy or childbirth recover more quickly.

The author says that the whole process that occurs after childbirth is called the postpartum care process.

During breastfeeding, infants and toddlers receive physical contact love while sucking on the mother’s breast and touching the mother’s breast.

So, it is said that babies who are breastfeeding a stable and happier and their mother have less tension, stress, fear and fear, and less illness. Their babies are said to have less infant colic. In addition, nursing mothers are less likely to develop postpartum blues or postpartum depression.

It is impossible to list many things that breastfeeding is scientifically and medically good, but the best advantage of breastfeeding is that breastfed babies receive physical contact love from their mothers and mothers also from their babies during breastfeeding described here.

As soon as the baby is born, more oxytocin hormone is secreted from the posterior lobe of the mother’s pituitary gland, and the breast milk secretion system in the mother’s breast is activated, the milk is secreted to the nipple, and the uterus contracts, resulting in faster postpartum recovery occurred. The oxytocin hormone is called the love hormone. It’s amazing.

 Picture 50. This young man is holding his two children without knowing that he is loving them through physical contact love. And both children are very much loved by their father’s physical contact love. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 Picture 51. This young man is holding one child and putting another child on his lap to make physical contact love without knowing that he is loving his children through physical contact love. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAA

Also, while raising children, parents unknowingly hug, lift, and let to sleep on parent laps, kiss, scratch the back, bathe, stroke the head, touch the shoulder, prick the side, and hold hands, arm wrestling, wrestling, horse riding, dressing, and stripping, touching the children’s bodies by the hand or the body to love them and fill their love tanks.

Many parents are unaware that the love of parents is strongly transmitted to their children through such physical contact mentioned above.

However, it is impossible to express how much parental love is transmitted through physical contact for children.

Children who live in beautiful homes, eating nutritious foods, or wearing good clothes cannot grow and develop properly if they do not receive any love through physical contact from their parents. They are more susceptible to mental and physical illness, obese, and more prone to depression if they do not receive.

When parents bathe their newborns or infants, bathing is a very good way to love children by wiping off unclean dirt and grime from the body, looking for any abnormalities in the body, loving words, loving eyes, and loving them through physical contact. The bathe given parentsi s a wonderful opportunity to give parents love.

It is a powerful means to convey the parents’ physical contact love to their children by scratching the back when itchy, and even if there is no abnormality at first glance when the limb is hurting. It’s a great opportunity to give focused attention love.

Not only while growing up, but also through adolescence, adulthood, and middle age, and until the old age where Yi Soon(60 years old) and Gohee(70 years old) meet, they use it as a vitality to remember and live without forgetting the significant physical contact love they received from their parents.

The trivial physical contact, such as a parent to pass by the side of adolescent children, pricking the child’s side with the parent’s hand, patting the child’s head, or swiping the shoulder, seems to be insignificant, but  such physical contact love is engraved, cherished, and remembered.

Even after they have grown up and become independent, while living apart from their parents, they use the petty physical contact love received from their parents as energy resources when they break away from the conflicts and hardships that occur in life.

At other special occasions, you can give your child a physical contact love to hug or hold her hand.

In particular, if you properly hug your pre-adolescent children and give them a lot of physical contact love, your children will not suffer from depression and will live as if the misty fog that had already existed in the mountains disappears.

Stress is eliminated and the body’s immune system functions more active, so the disease is healed well and the disease does not come back.

Children are happy and excited, they study better, they are more responsive to their parental guidance or authorities, and do their best in whatever they do.

There is a“Dr. Hug”.

The doctor also prescribes antibiotics to the patient as needed, or prescribes drugs such as digestive agents appropriately.

In addition, Dr. Hug says he prescribes “basic” drugs like the gamcho in herb medicine!

Can you guess what basic medicine is?

It is said that the ingredient of the basic drug was a drug called “Hug.”

He said that he prescribed “take the basic medicine orally four times a day.”

The main precaution on the prescription was warned, “Even overdose does not cause side effects and, of course, does not kill, but it can sometimes lead to poisoning” (Reference: LOVING EACH OTHER).

When I was a child, I remembered my father’s physical contact love, who washed me by pouring cold spring water over my whole body because I alone went to catch a basketful of crucian carp from the paddy pool.

How can I forget my mother’s physical contact, one day my mother brought me home by caring me on her back on the way home from elementary school because  I suffered from malaria with high fever and whole body ache at elementary school.

Carrying young children, giving them piggyback, and raising their children through physical contact love, such as riding a horse, is a kind of physical contact love.

Wrestling with school-age children, arm wrestling is all good examples of physical contact love.

Good clothes, travel, and education for children are good for raising children, but this kind of physical contact love received from parents seems very trivial in raising children, but it is an incredibly valuable way of raising children.

You may find that making physical contact love to your adolescent children is more difficult than before puberty.

Most adolescent children sometimes resist even when they receive the proper physical contact love from their parents.

However, simple and natural physical contact love is well received by adolescent children.

You can love them with intentional physical contact, and you can love them appropriately through natural physical contact.

Physical contact love from parents will be relatively well acceptable specially

 when they accomplish difficult tasks that their peers cannot achieve,

when they are hurt by something,

when they are hurt by physical injury,

when they are sick,

when the body is hurt,

just before they go on a long trip,

or when they return from it.

This kind of physical contact love that their parents have given them when they were young,  physical contact love still reminds them to have parental physical contact love ,

and when they encounter emotions and sorrows while they grow up and live independently from their parents, as well as during their growth and development. The love received from the parents becomes an energy resource in their lives.

Fig. 52. When parents give bathe a newborn or an infant, bathing is a very good means of physical contact love for young children, as well as to wipe dirty dirt, look for any abnormalities in the body, love with words and eyes. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

The loving bonding between parents and children is firmly formed in the child-raising process thru physical contact love given as in bathing, and conversation while also providing eye contact love at the same time and filling the child’s love tank thoroughly.

Rather than simply giving a bath, “You are so pretty”, “You are so good,” “You are so healthy,” or “Why are you so thin?”, “Eat more rice”, “I’ll buy vitamins, so you eat, get fat, and grow healthy. I hope.” If parent say love with words like your back, your child will know better that your father or mother truly loves you.

When they are convinced that their parents love them, it is natural for the child to obey well their parents’ training.

Physical contact love should be natural, comfortable, not excessive, and appropriate so as not to be awkward.

This is especially true when giving physical contact love to adolescent children.

Photo 53. Youngha receiving a special award at the Connecticut Stae Piano Contest.

The physical contact love for adolescent children can be more difficult for a number of reasons than before puberty. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 Photo 54. Younha being congratulated by receiving physical contact love from his piano teacher.

In special cases, such as when a person has accomplished a difficult task or when his heart hurts, a simple, appropriate, deliberate or natural  physical contact can help adolescents to accept it well. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 55. Dad gives focused attention loves and care to his adolescent daughter and loves her through appropriate physical contact. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 Photo 56. A mother loves her adolescent daughter with focused attention loves and care and appropriate physical contact. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

May I give one of my children’s physical contact experiences,

Once, on the birthday of my daughter, who was in college, I drove for 3 hours to give her birth party.

She invited some close friends and held a birthday party.

Suddenly she sat down on my knee where she was sitting, hugged my neck tightly with both arms, kissed my face like lightning, and said, “Thank you, Daddy.”

I don’t think there is a need to explain much how powerfully the appropriate physical contact love given by my daughter is transmitted to the parents as well.

Children who have the right amount of love for proper physical contact from their parents grow up really happy.

In addition, the children who grow up receiving a lot of unconditional love, care, training with love, good eye contact love and focused attention love, and care are the happiest in the world and full of justice to them.

As explained earlier, when giving physical contact love to adolescent children, it should be natural, comfortable, not excessive, not awkward, but short and simple.

However, in some cases, you can do a little longer and more.

The physical contact love received from parents is a necessity and energy resource that both boys and girls must have during their growth and development.

Photo 57. The two dogs Allie and Meggie are hugging each other. Although dogs, warm-blood animals are difficult to survive without receiving any physical contact love. In particular, we humans cannot live normally without receiving physical contact love. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

In particular, for boys and girls before the age of 7 years old, the love of their parental physical contact is extremely important and they need more.

Unfortunately, there are many children these days who grow up without receiving any of these proper physical contact love, especially from their father.

In particular, some doctors say that children who are growing up without receiving any proper physical contact love from their father are very poor.

In particular, Dr. Ross Campbell noted in his book “How to Really Love your teenager,” if girls are older than 12 years old grow up without receiving any of the proper physical contact love from particularly their father, girls are not happy at all.

As mentioned above, most adolescent children seem to resist when they receive physical contact love from their parents.

However, when they are tired, when they are sad, when they are away from home, when they go far away, when they are far from home when they are sick, when they are tired, when they are mentally and physically injured, when they accomplish difficult tasks and receive rewards,  when they fail. It is common for even adolescents to accept physical contact love appropriately in special cases such as when they do it.

Appropriate hugs by parents physical contact love are sometimes essential to school-age children before puberty begins, and even later adolescents.

The physical contact love received from parents can be the vitality and strength needed to more easily endure the confusion, conflict, solitude, frustration, and pain common to adolescent children. And that love becomes a vital energy resource to do their best whatever they do in their life.

Parents need to fill their children’s love tanks thoroughly with physical contact love, eye contact love, focused attention love, and care so that they can grow happily.

Last but not least, most of what I’ve learned from Dr. Ross Campbell’s “How to Really Love your teenager” and “How to really love your child”, along with 40 years of my pediatric practice  for children and adolescents, also raising my own three children. This article was written based on the experience gained while working.

Photo 58. If physical contact love shoud be given appropriately, but children like it. Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

How often have you given appropriate physical contact love to your children in your daily life? Also, how often did you say “I love you” while making physical contact love appropriately to your children, and also making eye contact love?

Are you truly loving and raising your children without condition?

If you love so much and fill your children’s love tanks untill the fullest, they will be healthy and happy and satisfied, they will follow their parents’ training and will do their best in whatever they do. And they will grow with sound healthy self-esteem and pride.

This is what parents wish for their children. In addition, it is the duty and right of parents to give their children unconditional true love through eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love, and care and love training.

<Isan Family Reunion>

Brother and sister reunion (Mt. Geumgang = Yonhap News) Reporter Do-hoon Kim = South Korean Min Ho-sik (84) and Min Eun-sik (81) from North Korea, at a group reunion held at the Kumgangsan Myeon Center on the afternoon of the 20th Reunion Ceremony day,  the first day of the 20th family reunion event. )

The grandmother from North Korea hugged and cried. See: Articles from The Yonhap News

18. Focused attention love and care to your children..131

Focused attention love is when a mother or a father spends time with a child and recognizes that heor she  is the most precious child in the world, while taking care of and loving that child.

It seems to be an ideal child love, and  is also the effect of focused attention love is too great.

When one parent focuses on one child, cares for him, and pours out his parent’s love so that he or she can feel that he or she is the most important being in the world, he or she can feel that the child is the most precious child to parents.

When a child is alone with one parent, that the child will feel comfortable, happy, and excited. The child may also feel like the best.

Every the child is born with the right to be protected and recognized, caree and loveed, affectionated, and sympathized from parents from birth. Parents have a duty to do so. In this sense, it is difficult to become a perfect parent.

In very active and hectic life, parents set aside time and focus on one child only.

Focused attention love, which pours out love and attention and cares for only a child, is quite difficult to do often compared to loving a child through eye contact or through physical contact love.

However, Focused attention love is the most important fundamental necessity in child-rearing.

In addition, focused attention love is an essential way of loving children for all children.

Focused attention love is an extremely important child-raising method for raising children, but it is surprising to see so many parents who act as parents without knowing how to do this or how much to do so.

Nevertheless, there are many parents who learn to focused attention on love and never try to do it even at least once.

I asked 150 Korean-American adults if they had ever had a good time with only one parent on a trip for a single day as a child or adolescent.

Three out of 150 Korean-American adults reported that they had a good time traveling with one parent in elementary and junior high school.

It was surprising that the Korean adults who participated in this survey were raised with little focused attention love and care from their parents when they were a young children.

But it was very painful to learn that the children of those adults had also grown up without receiving focused attention love from their parents.

All of our parents are unknowingly pouring out their love for their children and acting as parents.

However, our parents are not sure how much positively focused attention love affects their children’s growth and development, especially their mental and emotional health when raising their children.

They don’t even know that it is the most important means of communication between parents and children when one parent gives focused attention love and care to one child at a tme.

Photo 62. One day, my dad and I went hiking. How cool was that! He touched my shoulders, held my hands tightly, and how much fun it was! The time when he lifted me up, put me on my neck, and crossed the gutter! Sitting on a big rock, hugging me with his big arms. “I love my father.”. It was fun even if my cheeks were stabbed in his beard when he kissed me.

How happy I was when I walked with my dad only both! Dad loved me. Dad! Dad! I love Ocean Much and Mountain Much too

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Picture 63. Inviting friends and gathering family members to have a birthday party is also one kind of focused attention love.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 64. Inviting friends and gathering family members to have a birthday party is also one kind of focued attention love. He missed his mother for some reason,

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

The degree of happiness of the children and the degree to which they grow up with a sense of mental and emotional stability depend a lot on how much they are growing and developing while receiving focused attention love and care from parents.

While children are growing up, focused attention love, and care, eye contact love, physical contact love, and love training are essential for raising children.

 “My parents don’t love me”, or “My parents don’t care about me.” These words are commonly used by teenage children (13-18 years old) these days.

There are many meanings in these words.

There may be complaints that my parents are not interested in me, never go anywhere with me, or play with me.

Mom and Dad often go to dinner parties, wedding parties, reunion gatherings, club activities, etc. to enjoy their own pleasure, go mountaineering, go fishing, go sports, and even travel abroad.

However, growing young children and adolescents are left at home.

Parents also go on a foreign golf trip.

Parents often eat out with someone other than their families, such as breakfast, lunch, and dinner. There are no children here.

 Some parents spend their time joyfully and abundantly without accompanying their children in other ways. Even when parents and children are hiking for a short period of time, the dad is walking in front of the younger child and the younger child is walking from behind, or from the side or front. Parents walk without holding young child’s hands. It is difficult to find the way parents do eye contact love and physical contact love

If may I ask you for forgiveness, I would like to share my personal experiences. In August 1991, “ Translation int Korea version of How to Really Love Your Teenager,” by Ross Campbell, MD, was.

published in Seomundang, Seoul

Picture 65. Children are the number one priority in our lives. It is a priority that goes ahead of the company, over the honor, and over money.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

On that day, a free seminar was given by me  at the Daejeon YMCA under the theme of “Let’s raise your sons and daughters with unconditional love,” and a copy of Translation into Korea version of ‘How to Really Love Your Teenager’ was presented to 3 dozens of people who attended without any charge.

After Semina On that day, I went from Daejeon to Seoul by the train on the Honam Line with one of my relative sisters.

I had a brief conversation with my relative sister about raising children. The younger sister graduated in a famous women’s high school in Korea and worked for a long time at one of the famous banks in Seoul. Her character was also outstandingly beautiful.

She was a relative younger sister who was raised by her natural father of a rich family.

During a conversation with me, “Opa! In today’s seminar, you said that focused attention love, and care is so important for raising children, but I think you’re right.

When I was growing up, my dad never took me for even an hour, never took me anywhere, and never gave me focused attention love, and care, and my dad never played with me for an hour at home.

At this time, I watched the tears run down her cheek.

However, my dad raised only one son who is only one in the two-generation in that family, with so much pampering and love, but my father never took him anywhere.

So I’m trying not to raise my children in that way.”

At this time, more tears ran out of her eyes.

As already mentioned above, “From birth, children have the right to have protection, recognition, care and focused attention love and care from their parents.

In addition, I would like to repeat the statement once again that parents have a duty to fulfill their focused attention to love and care for their children.”

Many parents these days do not give their children focused attention love and care.

Even if they try to do it again, they don’t have time to do it.

Instead of giving focused attention love and care to children, they buy lots of toys, good clothes, or substitute focusd attention love and care with material things such as computers, audio games, consoles, and cars.

In general, many parents tend to replace focused attention love, and care by sending them to special education-good schools that are difficult to do, or by sending them to study abroad at early age for special education.

Photo 66. Children who grow up receiving enough true unconditional love. They love themselves and know how to love others with an abundance of sound healthy sel-esteem and pride.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 67. Children who grow up receiving enough genuine, unconditional love, know to love themselves and know how to love others with a lot of sound pride.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Of course, children need a good education, good toys, and good foods, clothings, and comfortable shelter.

Of course, parents also need leisure.

It is absolutely a big mistake for parents to substitute focused attention love and care for material things instead of giving them focused attention to love and care directly to their children.

Children, of course, need a good education, good clothes, safety home, toys, and other appropriate material things, but focused attention to love and care are absolutely necessary for them.

Today, many parents are well aware that their children grow up normally only when they give their children focused attention love, and care, but living in a society where it is difficult to do focused attention love and care is a big problem.

For one reason or another, many parents know focused attention love, and care is important for raising their children, but cannot give focused attention to love and care.

In a life of turbulence to love their children with focused attention love and care, parents must set aside time to spend time with one child as mentioned already.

In most cases, it takes at least hours or days to give focused attention love, and care, not just a few minutes.

But there are so many things that parents have to do other than the time that parents have to spend with one child.

If you just hear the phone ringing, you should answer the phone.

You need to clean the car and put gas in the car.

You should send flowers to your parents’ birthday and a congratulatory cake on your parents’ birthday.

You should also go to the reunion meeting.

There is so much to do. You go to church.

Therefore, parents are forced to set priorities in their busy lives.

We have to set priorities and deal with them one by one according to the priorities.

This is absolutely necessary in raising children.

It is extremely necessary not only in raising children but also in each individual’s life.

In other words, parents must start by setting priorities in their life.

Just before you start building a house, you need to start with the design you need to build it.

Priorities in our lives are different for each individual.

Therefore, no one else can set your priorities.

You have to decide for yourself.

Your priorities may differ depending on how important your spiritual life is to you.

Each person’s view of life may have different priorities depending on their view of religion.

Priorities may differ depending on the era and country in which you live.

For example, the priority of those who believe in God and live happily and successfully in this world. God, me, wife or husband, and children are the order of their priority lives.

In terms of it, there is no priority in this world that precedes children other than God, me, and a wife or husband.

During my pediatric practice for children and adolescents, I  have surveyed on the subject of “How to Love and Raise Uour Children and what is your life priorities.

According to the results of the survey, some parents replied that they lived with priorities suc as “money over children,” “honor over wives,” and “children over husband”.

Fortunately, she herself is not at the toppest priority in her life, But her husband is nex and then herself, and after that, most parents answered that their children are the most important priority in their life.

How have you set priorities in your life?

In fact, in this tumultuous cyber global village, in this society, aside from all things, one parent takes only one child and spends hours or days in two togeth to take care of and love their children. It is difficult to make it.

It takes little time for parents to love their children with eye contact love and physical contact love.

However, it takes a lot of time to give focused attention love and care. Time is gold.

We are all given equally 365 days a year, 7 days a week, and 24 hours a day.

It is not so easy for everyone to divide the given limited time and spend it as time to pay attention to and to love your child.

For one reason or another, there are too many parents who live without giving their children enough focused attention love and care.

.

Phto 68. There are so many things to do in our lives. We must prioritize. Money is important, and honor and job are important. But in our lives, children are at a higher priority than anything else. Only by focused attention love and care for him, they do their best and grow up with healthy self-esteem and pride.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 One day at the New York Airport, a friend from Korea suddenly telephoncalled me. He asked me to pick up him from New York Airport to my house at 6 pm tomorrow. It was nice that a close friend came from Korea to the United States and visitors to our house.

A local pediatricians in this town and I both have had an evening coverage for the emergency pediatric  calls for almost two decades on on-calls basis. According to the on-call schedule, I was on duty tomorrow evening.

I hung up the phone after we talke a little while, “I’ll give you an answer a little later because I will be on call tomorrow.”

Immediately afterward, I called Dr. Kelly, one of pediatricians, and I begged him and said to him, “If you take the on call for me for a few hours tomorrow, I will pay a considerable compensation and also I will take th e on-call for when you need later,and  I will do compensate for you accordingly”

“He can’t,” he said.

The reason was simple.

He said to me, “I promised a long time ago to go to the circus with my 6-year-old daughter, Carol, tomorrow afternoon.”

Dr, Kelly, a doctor who was always busy with his pediatric practice and saids that hwas sorry for not being able to give focused attention love, and care to his children. He thought that his little daughter Carol was more important than my circumstances and my request. He knew his daughter is more important  than money.

And I thought the doctor Kelly’s decision to deal with this situations, including the inability to break his promise to his little daughter Carol, was very appropriate.

The Eastern Confucian ideology and precept of “govern me first, then rule over my family, and then take care government” are also applied here.

Parents can take advantage of the opportunity to focused attention love and care and have a great opportunity to better care for their children and to communicate more with them so that they can communicate more with children.

In addition, children who are loved by focused attention love and care will be excited and comfortable, so parents have to talk about the worries, anxiety, mental and physical pain that children have deep inside their hearts, and the common problem “adolescent disease” that occurs during puberty. You will have a great opportunity to inform them and your parents will listen.

During focused attention love and care is given parents can have the best parent-child conversation.

One of the best ways to raise children to facilitate communication with your children is this focused attention love and care.

Nevertheless, at the restaurant, not one or two, dozens of young parents spend for hours to eating, drinking, and having fun without children.

Sometimes the young children in the house are able to  receive focused attention love and care.

and  children felt they are  the most important priority.

I used to play golf with one of my sons when was in his first year of college.

Photo 69. Even during a busy life, taking only one of several children for a walking or fishing, taking care of and loving him so that he feels that he is the most important and loveliest child in the world is called focused attention love, and care.

It is difficult to do this kind of focused attention love and care often, but if you do well with focused attention love and care, eye contact love, and physical contact love properly at the same time, children will open the window of their hearts and solve their problems deep in their hearts to parents.

Without hesitation, you can find out the problems that their children have, such as anxiety, pain, and conflict, and parents are very helpful in solving those problems.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

While playing golf with one of my son, we talked about the people living one way or another.

My son asked me, “Which of the motives was the most successful?”

I briefly talked about some of the motives for success.

I asked my son how his relationship with his girlfriend is these days.

My son’s answer was this.

“We are not seeing any more”. When I asked why, he said, “she lied and I would not meet”.

When I asked what a lie was,

“She lied about not smoking while she was smoking,” he said.

When I asked him how he knew if she had smoked, he replied, “When I kissed, I smelled a cigarette.”

Likewise, if a dad gives focused attention love, and care to a child while playing golf together with a young child or an adolescent child who has just passed puberty, both young child and adolescent child can communicate with hisr parent by confessing their extremely private privacy issues to their parent. It can be an opportunity to do it.

One child before puberty, oran  adolescent and one parent together, walking or fishing, traveling for a day or a few days, eating at a restaurant with only one child, caring for and loving the child while amusing and loving when you do, the child will feel happy.

At this time, if one parent is with one child and gives focused attention love, and care so that the child feels the most precious in the world, loves with good eye contact, loves with proper physical contact, cares for and fills his love tank sufficiently to overflow.It would be even better.

It is even more difficult to take only one among many children and set aside time to give focused attention love and care.

Sometimes, when other children or family members go somewhere for something, and one child is alone in the house, one parent can give the child a focused attention love and care. Sometimes two parents can make focused attention to love and care for their child together.

Parents and family members can give focused attention love and care to their children by holding a birthday party on their children’s birthdays, and the method of placing a flagpole near the entrance door saying “Welcome to you” on the returming day from the travel return is one kind of focused attention love. It’s one of the ways to love.

On the day of the guest’s arrival, a flagpole saying “Welcome you , Dr. John Lee to our house” is posted outside the entrance door.

I think the guests who come are very fond of it.

I give them focused attention love, and care. in addition, you can deliberately find opportunities to give focused attention love, and care to your children and

Photo 71. An aunt who is happy after receiving a birthday cake from one of her nephews and receiving eye contact love and focused attention love and care.

Grandmothers, mothers, adolescent children, and young children also like them when they receive focused attention love, and care.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 70. A mother who visited her daughter.

An elderly mother who enjoys the physical contact love and focused attention love and care she receives from her daughter. Grandmothers, mothers, adolescent children, and young children all equally like it when they receive focused attention love, and care.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 72. You can make focused attention love and care while celebrating a teen’s birthday.

Grandmothers, mothers, adolescent children, and young children also like it when they receive focused attention love and care.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 73. The grandmother will also like it.

While giving a birthday party like this, Children take care of her with focused attention love and care.

Grandmothers, mothers, adolescents, and young children also like them when they receive focused attention love and care.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 74. Dad who gives focused attention love and care, and physical contact love

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

It is also a part of focused attention love and cares that the entire family gathers and holds a celebration party for the graduated child. In such a case, not only one child and one parent, but whole family can give focused attention love, and care to only one child for his birhday.

In puberty, adolescent children often make plans for what to do as they do, so parents cannot support them even if they want to give their adolescent focused attention love, and care.

 Parents sometimes make plans to give their adolescent children focused attention, caring love.

However, a child may reject the opportunities that parent has planned to give thim focused attention love, and care.

There are many personal things that adolescent children have to do personally, not because they hate to receive focused attention love, and care from their parents, and not all parents know about.

Even adolescent children have to prioritize and live their lives.

That’s why they can’t always receive the focused attention love and care their parents want to do, and sometimes they can’t spend time leisurely with their parents.

In this world, there are many parents who have never been able to give such important focused attention love, and care in raising their children, and there are also children who have never received such love.

 Where can children receive this kind of focused attention love and care that they basically need ?

They can get it from people who promise to give them that kind of love instead of my parents.

There are many people around our children who promise to give such focused attention love and care instead of their parents.

How scary and chilling my heart is when I think that my dear child can be dragged into their hands one day without my permission.

Young infants, including adolescents, and school-age children find and want more than money, more than honor, more than anything else, their parents’ warm-hearted contact love, appropriate physical contact love, and focused attention love, and care.

And besides, it is the training of parents to do with true unconditional love.

See “Focused attention Love and care” in “How Do I Love and Raise My Children?” and “Love.

21. Sex education for children and adolescents….142

Until the past few decades, almost all parents wished that their children and adolescents would become productive members of society.

They taught ethics and morality as the basis for their growth.

Children studied hard to become a productive social member who had both cognitive education and physical education accordingly.

But Parents were unwillingly to teach knowledge about sex and they didn’t think young children should be learned, and of course, some parents didn’t teach at all.

And also children and adolescents themselves have not been educated or studied about sex in some.

Children thought that when they grow up, they naturally know the right sex values ​​and they can properly live in the opposite sex.

There was no such thing as wrong.

We lived knowing that it is natural to die from cancer or from getting sick from the infectious disease without vaccination in old time.

How about nowadays?

The topic of sex almost routinely appears as one of the main news topics in Local daily Newspapers, TV, radio, the Internet, iPad, movies, magazines and others.

In today’s cyber world, topics related to sex are no longer limited to the adult age group. Even young children can access information about sex indiscriminately through the media without being so difficult.

There are plenty of opportunities to see almost naked photos, and even at the world women’s pageant and at the Olympic Games, you can see the almost naked body.

A toddler in kindergarten says, “Sex is cool,” without knowing what that is.

Adolescent children also have a lot of knowledge about sex. The problem is that they seem to have a lot of right knowledge, but they don’t.

This is also easy for us to understand.

Today, many adolescent children learn about sex on their own through various media such as TV, newspapers, magazines, internet, and other sources.

They also learn a lot about sex from their peers.

Today, most adolescent children formally learn sexual knowledge through regular home pediatric sex education or regular school pediatric sex education. (Here, pediatric sex education is used in combination with the term pediatric sex education)

Compared to adolescent children who did not receive formal pediatric sex education at home or school, adolescent children who received formal pediatric sex education at school or at home have much more pronounced sexual values ​​and notions.

The majority of adolescent children who do not receive formal pediatric sex education at home or school tend to have sex with multiple sexual partners during early puberty, and teen pregnancy rates are said to be much higher for them.

They are also more susceptible to sexually transmitted diseases and have unhealthy sex values.

For one reason or another, most parents and the American Academy of Pediatrics strongly recommend that adolescent children should be given formal pediatric sex education.

I believe that it is essential to teach adolescent children who are active in sexual life how to use contraception to prevent pregnancy, to teach how to prevent sexually transmitted diseases from contracting sexually transmitted diseases, and to educate children about correct sexual knowledge and sexual values.

It is also very important to prevent unwanted teenage pregnancy through pediatric sex education.

Sexual values ​​and correct sexual notions are different for each individual, religion, society, and culture.

Curiosity and knowledge about sex vary with the age of adolescent children and continue to change with their maturity.

 Figure 98. The heterosexual relations of adolescent girls aged 15-19 years.

The study found that before the age of 15 yesars pld, adolescent girls had oral sex and vaginal sex in 25%,  26% vaginal sex only, and 8% oral sex only.

Source-2002 US CDC Report

However, many people view pediatric sex education negatively for the following reasons.

There are sometimes theories about teaching sex education to children.

Some argue that sex is privacy, and privacy should be treated as a matter of individual privacy.

There is nothing wrong with this.

Some parents believe that premarital heterosexual relationships should be taboo.

There are good reasons for that too.

For that reason, it is natural to come to the conclusion that pediatric sex education cannot be handled uniformly.

Some parents believe that it is good for their children to begin pediatric sex education a year or two before puberty begins.

However, it is a general opinion that it is too late when it comes to the most appropriate age to start pediatric sex education.

Infants aged 2, 3 and 4 years old know that the structure of the male and female body, especially the external genitalia is different.

They ask where the baby comes from, and they know that the male and female external genitals look mysterious.

Whether or not infants are curious about sex and ask questions, it is good to start with appropriate and correct pediatric sex education according to their age and ability to understand.

Many parents say they don’t give their children sex education for children, but our parents don’t really know about pediatric sex education since infancy.

When parents and children live in the same home, it’s good to give their children sexual education appropriate to their age.

For example, the name of each part of the external genitalia of men and women is taught in standard languages, such as teaching infants and children the names of each part of the body such as the eyes, the nose, and the mouth in standard language.

In a cyber world where men and women can see naked men and women in a medium every day, sex education should not be given to children by using words such as “inner thing”, “chili”, and “it” on the external genitalia.

For example, the names of each part of the external genitalia of a woman or man-penis, volva, scrotom, breasts, etc. should be taught in standard language. This is also part of pediatric sex education.

When your children’s questions about sex are inappropriate or unfamiliar and cannot be answered quickly, do not avoid answering them right away, nor do they answer them incorrectly.

However, whether you can say that “I cannot answer the question because it is inappropriate, or that I will answer it after more study”, you must answer it clearly and seriously.

In addition, instead of answering by you, you have to answer clearly, such as asking someone else to answer.

By avoiding answers when children ask questions, they can admit that my parents don’t like us to ask questions about sex, and the they no longer ask about sex, even if their children have serious sex issues.

When asked about sex, parents can be uncomfortable and sometimes embarrassing.

Nevertheless, answer each of your child’s questions politely, kindly, and simply and clearly.

You should also give them the opportunity to ask questions again.

Do not cover topics of pediatric sex education that are inappropriate and difficult to understand for your children’s age.

And if you do too many children’s sex education at once, they can’t understand them all.

Sometimes, to determine the level of sexual knowledge, pediatric sex education can be provided by parents asking questions directly to them.

Children should be trained not to see, hear, and learn by themselves without parental permission on TV, magazines, radio, and the Internet, such as on TV, magazines, radio, and the Internet, about sex-related information that betrays parents’ gender values, violates ethical morals and has no value in child sex education.

Suppose a parent and a child accidentally watch a TV program about AIDS together.

These opportunities can be used to make children age-appropriate pediatric sex education about AIDS. In addition, sexual education can be provided for infectious sexually transmitted diseases other than AIDS.

These days, pediatric sex education is usually provided to students through regular education courses in elementary, middle and high schools in the United States. However, it is also important to find out how much sex knowledge children have learned and known through the school sex education process.

If necessary, more necessary pedophile sexual knowledge should be learned through regular home pediatric sex education.

When infants aged 3, 4, and 5 years old ask where the baby came from, do not falsely answer that the baby came out in a way that is not true, whether the big stork brought the baby from the mountain, or that it came from the mother’s belly button. The answer should be brief and clear that the baby grew in the belly of the mother and came out through the vaginal cavity or vaginal birth canal of the mother.

Most of the infants of this age group know some of the differences in the external genitalia of the opposite sexes. However, the egg and sperm meet in the fallopian tube and become a fertilized egg. The fertilized egg implants on the inner wall of the uterus to form a fetus, and the fetus grows in the uterus and is born through the mother’s vaginal birth canal.

They are curious about the external genitalia of the opposite sex and even want to see and touch it. At this time, if infants ask questions about their external genitalia, other people’s external genitalia, or sex, they should answer simply and clearly.

During proper parenting of the children’s eye contact love and physical contact love, neither my child nor another child should not have more physical contact than necessary.

Aside from being properly examined by a doctor, anyone should not make inappropriate contact with the child’s external genitalia or any other part of the body. This is also pediatric sex education.

Don’t let anyone kiss or hug.

Chidren should give also to educate anyone whod should not  touch them with  inappropriate physical contact.

It is normal for growing children to have some curiosity about sex.

But it teaches them that the other sex matter is very personal privacy.

Educate children that they should not speak or ask questions about their own or their parents’ sex anytime or anywhere. The same goes for adults. This is the right gender notion of civilized society.

When brothers and sisters aged 2, 3, and 4 year old bathe together, they  see and learn the differences between the external genitalia of males and females.

The process by which a mother gives birth or a dog or a cat gives birth to a baby can be explain how a woman conceives and gives birth to a baby.

His mother has infant’s hands to place on the pregnant his mother’s tummy, and the infant  baby can be taught how to grow in the mother’s womb, exercise, and play by detecting the birth.

The external genitalia is a very personal part of the body, so it is said that you should dress invisibly

It teaches that you can see someone’s external genitalia accidentally, but you shouldn’t look at it carefully and that you shouldn’t deliberately show your external genitalia to anyone.

It educates them that if their peers accidentally expose their external genitalia, they can’t do it, and that anyone exposing their external genitalia is rude and inappropriate, and that they shouldn’t do that.

When young infants take off their clothes, see each other, touch each other, and play with their genitals, stop immediately when they engage in “sex play”.

 Give them time-out training or isolate them from playing with them anymore.

At home, the behavior of young children to show naked  in front of their parents, siblings, and children are treated differently in different families.

From the age of 4 to 5 year old, it is not a big problem for same-sex brothers, father-sons or mother and daughter to appear naked when bathing together.

Regardless of the reason, they are educated to teach that it is inappropriate to take off their clothes and wear clothes after the age of 4-5 years old, whether naked in front of opposite-sex brothers and sisters or opposite-sex parents. Of course, after the age of 4-5, naked and opposite-sex parents should not take a bath.

Before puberty begins, most of the 6 to 8-year-old school children know their gender and can identify the men and the women.

They know that babies grow in the mother’s stomach and are born through the mother’s vaginal cavity. They also know that sexual intercourse can lead to pregnancy.

She feels ashamed when she shows her naked body to others. The tendency to play and act with same-sex children becomes more pronounced.

For them, the names and functions of each part of the genital organs of the men and the women, what is puberty, when it comes to age, why puberty comes, what is menstruation and why, what is sexual intercourse, and how to become pregnant, correct sex values, sex. It is necessary to educate notions, the effect of heterosexual relationships on social, emotional, and mental problems related to sexual intercourse, methods of contraception, and prevention of infectious sexually transmitted diseases.

When you can date, kiss, or have intercourse, how to refuse when a heterosexual friend asks you to have intercourse, what will happen if you have sex, and why if you don’t agree with premarital sex? Explain to your children.

Most of the early adolescent children aged 8, 9, and 10 years old know menstruation, fertilization, sexual intercourse, and the names and functions of each part of the male and female genitalia much better than before.

Knowing that a man’s cock (penis) is inserted into a woman’s vaginal cavity and intercourse, a man ejaculates semen into the vaginal cavity during intercourse. One of the billion sperms in the semen meets an ovum from the women’s ovary and they become the fertilized egg  which grows up to and knows that the baby is born into this world through the vaginal birth canal of a woman.

At this time, the most girls have puberty and some of them have their first menstruation.

It teaches that you can take off your clothes and play naked in front of same-sex peers, but not in front of opposite sexes.

At this time, when adolescents ask about sex, they must answer the truth accurately.

During pediatric sex education, parents and adolescent children may feel uncomfortable while embarrassing each other.

For that reason, some adolescent children do not like to receive pediatric sex education from their own parents.

If parents cannot provide pediatric sex education to their children, they can ask teachers or pediatricians for pediatric sex education, or use a pediatric sex education reference book that can be easily read by parents and children.

Of course, not all parents themselves can provide formal pediatric sex education to their children.

Parents often need to learn and prepare for pediatric sex education before starting pedophile sex education with their children.

Depending on the child, puberty comes months or years early or late, and when puberty comes, the emotions of male and female adolescent children also change. height and weight increase rapidly.

Girls’ breasts, vulva, and buttocks are remarkably enlarged, pubic hair is formed, and normal physiological discharge from the vagina is produced.

It is taught that boys’ penis, testicles, and seminal vesicles are enlarged, pubic hair, whiskers, and acne appear, and that they sleep and masturbate normally.

Teach adolescents that sexual intercourse can lead to pregnancy and infectious sexually transmitted diseases.

Therefore, it also teaches how to use contraception and prevent infectious sexually transmitted diseases.

At this time, the sexual impulse can arise when male and female adolescent childre have physical contact, and when sexual impulses arise, they are also taught how to deal with them.

Parents, children, and others should respect each other’s privacy, and each family establishes and teaches the family nudity rules of their families to follow those rules.

It is taught that infants, children of school-age before and after puberty, and adults also feel good when they touch or stimulate their external genitalia by themselves, and they can also masturbate.

Whether they do not masturbate at all, much or less, they teach that they are harmless to health , but parents should teach them not masturbate in front of others.

If parents think masturbation is bad, they should clearly explain to their children why.

If a young child asks you more about your parent’s sex life or privacy, you have your privacy, and your parents have parental privacy.

Because of this, it is rude to ask about the sex life or privacy of yourself, your parents, or others, and cut out that I cannot tell you all of my privacy.

Some adolescent children manipulate and coerce them by making them feel guilty so that their peers experience the same relationship as they did with the opposite sex, drinking, smoking, and addictive substance abuse.

Peers who do not give in are often isolated and bullied in their society. Teach them to be careful not to succumb to their maneuvering and pressure, and to continue to grow up with the right gender values.

It is taught that sexual intercourse can lead to sexually transmitted diseases such as gonorrhea, syphilis, and AIDS and more that it can lead to severe illness or even death.

It teaches that the best way to prevent contagious sexually transmitted diseases is to have good sex values ​​and to be taboo.

Sexual intercourse with condoms can prevent some contagious sexually transmitted diseases, but it cannot be completely prevented.

There are various types of contraceptives such as oral, injectable, and subcutaneous injection, and pediatric sex education is provided on the use and efficacy of contraceptives and condoms, and other methods of contraception.

Contraceptive pills can be almost 100% contraceptive effevive if used correctly, but sexually transmitted diseases cannot be prevented.

It is educated that using condoms during intercourse and contraception can prevent contraception and contagious sexually transmitted infections to some extent, but using condoms and contraceptives together can provide almost 100% contraception and prevent infectious STDs almost 100%.

Children who view premarital sex negatively should be taught how to contracept and prevent sexually transmitted diseases.

Teach them to be careful not to be raped by friends, acquaintances, neighbors or strangers.

How to prevent rape, how to clearly say that you will not be in the opposite sex when you are forced to engage in a heterosexual relationship, drinking while dating or using habitual drugs makes it easier to suffer dating violence or dating rape, and emergency contraception that is used as an emergency contraception when raped educate that there is a way.

Teach some adolescent children that they can temporarily fall in love with a same-sex, opposite-sex, or the teacher.

Usually, this is normal, and it also teaches homosexuality, heterosexuality, and bisexuality.

When giving regular pediatric sex education to children at home or at school, they can giggle and laugh and get them sexual urges.

It can even be mistaken for being an impulse to have sex.

Some adolescent children can be embarrassed by blushing and embarrassing just hearing the word sex.

Sexuality issues belong to personal privacy to the last, and they sometimes take the attitude of parents that no one can tamper with my sex.

Adolescent children also have privacy about their own sex.

However, it is the responsibility of parents to properly discipline and guide their growing children and educate them that they have a duty to accept it.

As if parents own their children, parents should not conduct formal pedophile sexual education with thatl parents completely ignore their children’s rights, gender values ​​or opinions.

Sexual education for adolescent children is also naturally conducted in a way that parents and children exchange sex knowledge, just as parents normally communicate with their children, and it is recommended to recognize the correct sexual values ​​of children and to keep them.

Some adolescent children accept their parents’ good sexual values, while others may not accept their parents’ sexual values ​​purely.

Still, adolescent children keep their parents’ pediatric sex education deep in their hearts, and later they solve the sex problem by recalling the sex education given by their parents   in their lives.

For adolescent children who need their parental love more than ever, parents need to make sure they are waiting in a position to meet and discuss with them at any time and to guide, and help them.

Thirteen-year-old teenage mothyer who was not wed  and is walking down the street with their newborn baby after giving birth, break our hearts.

That’s all!

It is also unfortunate when treating those suffering from dying from infectious sexually transmitted diseases such as gonorrhea, syphilis, and AIDS.

This kinds of problems are fortunately  downward trend in the United States these days.

Whether you agree or disagree, it is a common opinion today that growing adolescent children must be given pediatric sex education.

There are so many references for pediatric sex education that parents and children can easily read to fill a corner of American bookstores.

Some of them have more than over 100 pages.

It would be a good idea to regularly provide pediatric sex education to children of children and adolescents (ages 0-18 year old) at home using these different types of books on pediatric sex education.

“Parents should also be at least half a doctor”– Encyclopedia of Child and Family Nursing – Vol. 24 “Pediatric and Adolescent Sex Education” would be very helpful if children had sex education at home or school.

The following is an example of a question-and-answer on health counseling for children and adolescents on the Internet about “sex education for children aged 3-5 years old, what to do in this case”.

Q&A. Sexual education for children aged 3 to 5-years-old, what to do in this case

Hi Sir.

I am a mother with a 5-years-old boy and a 3-years-old girl.

Nowadays, my older child is taking a bath or playing, touching a pepper (penis), or even taking a bath, touching a pepper and playing, showing it to his younger brother or seeing his penis.

It is said that these behaviors of children are natural, but from a mother’s point of view, how to deal with it is difficult. I am not sure what to explain to my child in touch a case.

Dear Lee Cheong

Hello. Thanks for the great question.

Boys and girls aged 3 to 5 years old know the differences in the body of the men and the women, especially the external genitalia, and take a lot of interest in the bodies of themselves or other children or adults.

Also, since it feels good to touch one’s external genitalia, he often touches it and sometimes masturbates.

This is normal.

It is inappropriate for boys or girls from the age of 4-5 years old to bathe with the opposite sex.

Therefore, they should not have a bath together.

Instead of teaching each part of the external genitalia as “chili”, “jamji”, or “it”, children should have sex education in children using the correct standard language such as penis or vova and so on.

The external genitalia, such as the penis is very personal privacy and should not be shown to others, nor should it be taught that it is not allowed to secretly or deliberately see the external genitalia.

No one, except when parents give a bath or change clothes, or when health care is required, that the parent can see or properly touch the child’s external genitalia, and that the doctor properly touches the external genitalia during the examination. You must teach them not to let them touch or show them.

22. Punishment or corporal punishment for children in-home or at the school ——-p140

What is corporal punishment?

Corporal punishment is a training means to give painful feeling children to do right behavior physically, verbally, behaviorally after parents are thinking over again whether their behavior or talking is not right or right.

In order to make them do the right behavior, to say right, parents may give corporal punishment to their children to do righteously.

There are many kinds of corporal punishment such as spanking corporal punishment to children and adolescents given by parents at home, and school punishment given to students by teachers or school authorities in school and corporal punishment can be given by legally for a person who has committed an offense.

The 50 US states legally allow corporal punishment by parents to children in the home for the purpose of training children.

However, in Canada, Japan, South Africa, and the most European countries, spanking corporal punishment given by parents to their children for the purpose of training their children at home is illegal.

Spanking corporal punishment is a kind of corporal punishment in which a parent strikes his or her infant or the child’s hips or the limbs once or twice with a wide-open palm so as not to injure the infant’s hips or the limbs in order to guide their misbehaving children 4-5 years old.

Many parents admit that corporal punishment to train  4-5 years old children by sensible spanking corporal punishment is okay for child-rearing.

However, in order to correct wrong behavior, physical punishment by hitting a child of any age group with a fist or a spear can have various negative consequences, both physically and mentally. Such corporal punishment is not legally permitted. It is considered physical child abuse and may be considered offenses.

Is corporal punishment training necessary to correct wrong child behavior?

The answer to this question is not consistent.

Regarding the necessity of corporal punishment in order to train children, there are the pros and cons of both East and West continue and also depending on individuals, regions, countries, cultures, habits, and religious views. Giving corporal punishment for child-rearing is viewed from a negative perspective as well as a positive perspective.

The child-raising method to trains children who misbehave through corporal punishment has been widely used regardless of age and time.

There are many parents and educators, past or present, who believe that corporal punishment is the fastest and most effective method to control misbehaving children.

Some of the elementary, middle, and high school teachers have also given love and punishment in order to guide students to the right path for students who violate school rules and conduct themselves wrong. Rarely, the teacher even hits students with a fist or ‘loving wood stick’.

Let me give my childhood corporal punishment given by my teachers at the elementary school and the high school where I had attended. I did not do anything wrong in elementary and high school, and my attitude was neither impure nor bad, but the teacher slapped me on the cheek and was just beaten in front the my classmates.

The corporal punishment received from a teacher at that time was beating, not corporal punishment training. I remember the beatings that were inflicted so far, I don’t want to see the teacher again, and I still have negative feelings.

Whether a parent gave corporal punishment training to a child or a teacher gave corporal punishment training to a student, corporal punishment is corporal punishment.

In most cases, corporal punishment has negative consequences physically, mentally, psychologically, and in many other ways.

Nevertheless, while raising their children, many parents do not set a certain standard for training their children for the bad behavior,  they are training their children to punish their children.

 Physical punishment training for children and view of religion

Unfortunately, today, some pastors and some Christians minister interpret the Bible’s words of “Whips and scold give wisdom, but if left arbitrarily, their children will dishonor their mothers” (Proverbs 29:15).

 He insists that it is acceptable to have children tobe trained through corporal punishment according to the Scriptures.“Your staff and Your staff comfort me” (Psalm 23:4).”

There is also a Bible saying, Fathers, do not anger your children, but bring them up only in the discipline and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4).

God will see joyfully to nurture the child’s heart and the body without hurting them.

Student corporal punishment and school education

Nowadays, some of the educational experts argue that “it is okay to train them with corporal punishment” to correct the wrong behavior of students.

On August 3, 2000, in an article in the Hankook Ilbo in New York, “73% of Korean parents need training for corporal punishment to correct the wrong behavior for their children.”

It is said that this article was “from the results of a survey of 30 Korean Americans in New York.”

There are many types of school corporal punishment training, such as school corporal punishment  training, education corporal punishment, desirable corporal punishment, the wood stick corporal “dang dang-bong”, and corporal punishment culture.

New words about student corporal punishment training also appeared in the media.

In order to correct wrong behaviors or wrong attitudes, there are also schools that have installed and operated a “Chodalsil” in which the teacher ca give the student a corporal punishment.

Before taking corporal punishment in school and before giving corporal punishment training, it is essential to know the cause and motive of the wrongdoing in order to correct the wrongdoing.

First of all, it must be to correct the student’s behavior according to the cause and motivation.

Children’s Training should not be conducted through corporal punishment in a simple manner like that “the frozen feet is melted by their own urination in the cold mountain”.

As already explained above, it is true that if elementary, middle, and high school students in various Western countries behave in violation of school rules or rules, the wrong behavior is corrected through corporal punishment training as necessary.

Even school children know well whether the behavior or words of a parent or teacher to them are consistent, fair, excessive, or appropriate.

Young children also want to be judged fairly for their wrongdoing, especially for adolescent children.

When your child does wrong, you should first look at the motives and causes of the wrongdoing before undergoing corporal punishment training to correct the wrongdoing.

Some of the wrongdoings of adolescent children may be wholly responsible for the adolescent child himself, and sometimes the child’s parents, teachers, society, or the state.

In other words, no matter how well the children try to behave and take the most appropriate attitude but children’s wrong behavior is based on their inadequate child-rearing methods, their social authorities or leaders’ poor leadership ability, or inappropriate national policies or social absurdities. This can be done wrong, and their attitude can be inappropriate.

The motives and causes of the children’s wrongdoing are in their parents, authorities, the country or society, and the children are admitted to have misbehaved, and the children are trained in corporal punishment.

In the past, this kind of corporal punishment training was popular in elementary, middle, and high schools in my childhood.

In many cases, the motive or cause of the wrongdoing of students was in parents, school teachers, authorities, and leaders of the state or society.

Parents, teachers, older generations, and leaders of national society should be exemplary for growing children. There is a duty and responsibility to train the children of the country according to that example.

“When the upper river stream water is clear, the lower stream water also is clear”.

Children who have been trained in corporal punishment from an early age at home or at school while growing up can behave violently at home, in school or in society, and even after adulthood.

Who can be held responsible for these results?

If pre-adolescent children or adolescent children are punished by corporal punishment in front of their friends, peers, and classmates for their wrong behavior or attitude, the pride of the children being punished is fatally lost and their privacy is greatly hurt.

In particular, when adolescent middle and high school students are punished by corporal punishment in front of their classmates at school, you can’t imagine how great the contempt is.

How can I forget all such experiences in my childhood life?

Anytime, anywhere, corporal punishment remains a mental scar for my life.

The corporal punishment received from parents at home is almost the same. The child’s healthy self-esteem is damaged.

Children who have been abused mentally and physically from a young age, who have not received enough true unconditional love, or who have been trained in corporal punishment are more likely to have safety accidents and more behavioral disorders.

Inappropriate behaviors such as truancy, poor grades due to not studying, poor learning attitudes, drinking alcohol, smoking, drug use, threats, bullying, and promiscuous sexual relations at school can be seen in adolescent life.

These days, parents are studying how to educate and guide elementary, middle, and high school students in the United States and other countries around the world. In particular, not only the education community but also parents are struggling on this issue with great interest. However, it is a common opinion that school corporal punishment training cannot solve this problem.

Domestic corporal punishment can lead to symptoms of Chilgok Ulsan symptom.

 Physical punishment training with children with mental, emotional, and physical problems

Hyperactivity disorder (HD), and/or attention deficit disorder (ADD), behavioral abnormalities, and mental problems are found in 6-10% of US elementary, middle and high school students.

In some studies, over 15% of elementary, middle, and high school students have hyperactivity disorder and/or attention deficit disorder which are more commonly seen in the children trained by the corpral punishment  training.

Students with this behavioral abnormality or mental disorder may appear poor in learning attitudes in their home or school, are abnormally hyperactive, and show signs of symptoms of attention deficit disorder, so their wrong behavior is disrupting not only for themselves but also for classmates. It is appearing as a big problem in the field, teachers, and the education world.

Behavioral abnormalities and mental problems are treated with drugs at home or school, and psychological counseling as needed, but there is no discernable cure for this kind of disease and problems yet.

The cause of this disease has not yet been clearly identified, but it is said to be congenital.

Since the diagnosis and treatment methods are not clear, it is a big problem in education because of children with hyperactivity disorder and/or attention deficit behavior. Nowadays they are taught the same task in the same class as other students who do not have such activity or emotional disorder.

Symptoms of this activity disorder may also appear during school hours.

The student himself is also unable to control his or her activities normally, so he can continue with the wrong activities.

Some parents treat students with such activity disabilities as bad or spoiled children, and some parents and teachers correct inappropriate behaviors committed by those students with corporal punishment.

When behaviors resulting from some false hyperactivity appear in a child, sometimes without the help from a professional to correct the wrong behavior/

What to look for before training with corporal punishment

When asking a child to do the wrong thing right, parents and teachers should ask the child kindly and politely.

You should never make a verbal request that is emotionally unpleasant.

It is good if the child complied with your request.

However, if the child does not comply with the request, you have to check whether you have made a request appropriate to the child’s age, abilities, and maturity,

You need to quickly check to see if the child has any abnormalities mentally, emotionally, and physically, whether he is hungry, and whether he is growing up with enough genuine unconditional love.

The parent or teacher making the request should also be checked for mental, physical, spiritual, economic, social, and family problems.

If the parent, teacher, or the requested child does not have any problems listed above, and the child does not comply with the parent’s or teacher’s request, the child may be sternly ordered to comply.

If the children disobey or rebel, you can train them with behavior correction or punishment.

However, any form of punishment can have negative consequences.

Therefore, neither at home nor at school should correct a child’s fault with punishment as much as possible.

In particular, a child who does wrong behavior should not be trained through corporal punishment.

In elementary, middle, and high school, when students behave incorrectly, it is ideal to train them in the order of request, order, and behavior correction, and to correct other behaviors.

Depending on the motive and cause of the negative behavior, it is necessary to lead the child who did the negative behavior to the right path through training methods other than corporal punishment.

Unfortunately, in many cases, it is difficult to find out the motive or cause of the wrong behavior, making it difficult to learn how to train the child.

In school, when a student possesses a weapon, destroys property, or creates a dangerous situation through violence, parents, teachers, security guards, etc., in accordance with the school rules, are forced to deter his misconduct in the field, if possible. At the same time, it must be resolved according to the law. At this time, the method of restraining student’s misconduct with force also belongs to a kind of physical punishment training.

Teachers should not beat student when correcting misbehaving students. His misconduct must be resolved with school rules or laws.

Ideally, parents, teachers, schools, school counselors, doctors, and clinical psychologists will work as a team to resolve behavioral disorders in school students, cooperating with each other to find the motives and causes of misbehaving and lead them on the right path accordingly. .

In this ideal way of educating students, a lot of time outside of school education and many experts besides parents and teachers are sometimes needed.

He told me not to give corporal punishment when leading misbehaving children in the right way.

If necessary, it can be trained as punishment such as a time-out or behavior restriction.

When you need to train your children to be punished to correct wrong behavior, you can punish them discreetly with age differences.

If you need to punish a 4-6-year-old child who behaves incorrectly to correct his or her behavior, you can punish him with a “time out” for 4-6 minutes.

Time-out punishment can be given to the child to be alone in a room or in a corner of the room for a few minutes, appropriate to his age, to make him repent of what he did wrong and behave correctly in the future.

When a 6-8-year-old early school-age child needs to be punished to correct a mistaken behavior, it is appropriate to give a time-out penalty that allows him to stay alone in a corner of the room for 6-8 minutes.

Of course, you can train differently depending on the degree of wrongdoing.

Otherwise, punishment can be done by preventing them from going out of the house for 2-3 days to play, playing at a friend’s house, preventing friends from visiting the child’s house, not watching TV, playing audio games, etc..

Spanking corporal punishment training is when parents strike two times with their wide-open palms so as not to injure their hips or limbs in order to properly guide a misbehaving infant 4-5 years old.

Spanking corporal punishment training is a kind of corporal punishment, but many parents generally accept corporal punishment, which trains infants 4-5 years old with sensible spanking corporal punishment training.

However, training a child with a fist or a spear to correct a child’s wrongdoing can have a number of negative consequences, sometimes leading to physical abuse in children.

For this reason, it is imperative not to punish with corporal punishment for wrongdoings of children at school or at home.

Negative consequences of corporal punishment training

Picture 88. Corporal punishment can damage the child body and make the child sick and vulgar. After corporal punishment, it cannot be restored to its original state before the cycle. Children who have lost their pride in corporal punishment and children who are raised with frequent corporal punishment are able to engage in more negative behavior at home, school, and society, and children become adults who tend to train their children for corporal punishment. Children raised under corporal punishment can be violent at home, at school, and in society.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

① It can damage the body and make the child’s mind and the body hurt and weak.

② After giving corporal punishment, it cannot be returned to its original state before the cycle.

③ Children who suffered corporal punishment lose their pride

④ Children who are raised with frequent corporal punishment are more likely

    to  engage in negative behavior at home, school, and society, and have a

     greater tendency to train their children through corporal punishment even

     after they reach an adulthood.

⑤ Children raised by corporal punishment may be more violent at home,

     school, and society.

⑥ It can disturb school class hours, school events, and social events.

⑦ Incorrect corporal punishment can result in child abuse. (Eg, Chilgok Ulsan Syndrome)

⑧ If corporal punishment is given frequently, the effect of corporal

    punishment is insignificant and the responsibility and punishment

   for wrongdoing. You can think of it as just changing what you receive.

⑨ The bonding of warm love between parents and children and between teachers

     and students is not well-formed.

⑩ Parents or teachers, who give corporal punishment, and children who receive corporal punishment can all be emotional. For this reason,  parents, teachers who give corporal punishment to children can be emotional in the process of exchanging corporal punishment.

⑪ Corporal punishment that does not cause pain, does not have the effect of corporal punishment training. Corporal punishment hurts, physical damage.

⑫ Corporal punishment always brings negative consequences, and although it

     can prevent the child from doing wrong actions anymore, it cannot teach

    you how to behave correctly in the future.

⑬ The image of the teacher or parent who gave corporal punishment is damaged.

⑭ It can be a family that uses corporal punishment as a priority training

    method following generations.

⑮ Neither parents nor teachers are recognized correctly and may not have a

    sound conscience.

 Sequelae of corporal punishment received in childhood (negative consequences)

It is said that severe corporal punishment from parents as children can lead to aggressive behavior in childhood, and mood disorders, anxiety disorders, alcohol addiction, habitual drug addiction, and personality abnormalities can occur in adulthood after growing up. Source: Journal Watch Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine August 2012

Spanking corporal punishment training

 In the United States, when children do wrong, some of parents are raised by training spanking corporal punishment to correct the wrong behavior.

However, most pediatricians, parents, teachers, educational board members, lawmakers, and residents of the United States in principle disagree with the use of spanking corporal punishment training when training children to correct wrongdoings.

The American Academy of Pediatrics also does not officially recommend corporal punishment, which trains children with spanking corporal punishment.

The reason is obvious.

This is because children are emotionally rich, innocent, and inexperienced, and after receiving any kind of physical punishment training, there are many negative consequences.

Studies have shown that most of the parents of middle-class families in the United States do spanking corporal punishment training to correct their behavior when their children do wrong. Spanking corporal punishment training is a form of corporal punishment (see spanking above).

Other studies have shown that some American parents believe that the mental and physical health of their children raised after receiving appropriate spanking corporal punishment training is not impaired by corporal punishment and that their children behave in a positive way.

Some Americans argue that proper corporal punishment is a necessity for the upbringing of children, and it is the duty and responsibility of parents to train their children for corporal punishment according to the Bible, spiritual education, and beliefs. When infant children do wrong, they raise their children through spanking corporal punishment training to correct the wrong behavior.

I think that the mental health of children raised after receiving appropriate spanking corporal punishment training does not deteriorate, they do not grow into violent adults, and spanking corporal punishment training for child-rearing is not abusive of children.

Some parents argue that training with appropriate corporal punishment, such as spanking corporal punishment, does not break the love bonding between parents and children, and that the bonding of love does not weaken or break.

In this way, there are parents who express positive approval for the necessity of appropriate corporal punishment training in raising their children according to culture, religion, personal values, and in which country they live, while others disagree in negative terms.

You must learn to forgive when training wrongdoings as punishment.

 If your child is wrong and tries to punish him to correct his behavior, you should forgive him if he repents of his wrongdoing and apologizes for the mistake.

This forgiveness is beautiful, builds a child’s healthy self-esteem, and sometimes results in phenomenal training.

However, when you forgive, do not condone or excuse for wrongdoing.

Forgive appropriately by referring to children age and circumstances of wrongdoing.

In conclusion, the author’s opinion is that children should not be trained at home or at school for physical punishment in parenting.

 

 24. Help your children to develop healthy self-esteem…..164

Photo 3-239. Children who are raised with enough true unconditional love not only love themselves but also others and do their best in whatever they do. From an early age, she has been growing with sound healthy self-esteem and pride, and confidence.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Who is a successful person?

Parents and siblings are harmonious and comfortable, looking up to heaven, and looking around the world, without shame, being gentle, good, polite, humble, living in humility, raising children so that they can be part of a productive member in society with sound healthy self-esteem and pride, and love while helping others.

in addition that, if you have abundant food, clothing, and comfortable shelter in your life, healthy, and productive in this world, you can say that you may be a successful person.

I wonder how many such people are in this world.
All parents desperately want their precious children to have a successful life.
But being successful is not that easy.
Looking at the entire life of “successful people”, they have one or two things in common for their success.
They were healthy, had smart brains from their birth, studied hard, did their best in whatever they did, had good interpersonal relationships, and when they did something, they had a good plan before starting and did it well systematically.

He went ahead and ended it successfully, He set his priorities in his life well and did his job well according to that priority.

On top of that, not only have they have received unconditional and genuine love from their parents during their growth, they will continue to be loved by their parents and continue to learn to love their spouse, children, and others even after adulthood, and they will have a wealth of financial and sound healthy self-esteem and pride.

It is true.
It’s easy to understand how important it is for growing children to have a lot of healthy self-esteem and pride.
How much you have healthy self-esteem and pride determines whether you can succeed in this world or not.
The children raised up with genuine, unconditional love from their parents have healthy self-esteem and pride, and strength and they grow up happily.
Parents have so many things to do with their children from an early age to help them to be successful with a lot of healthy self-esteem and pride.
The most important thing among them is to give enough true love without conditions.
Parents need to fill their children ‘s love tanks fully thoroughly, training them with eye contact love, proper physical contact love,  focused attention love, and care, and train with love.
Only then, from birth to newborn, infancy, school age, puberty, and adulthood, knows how to love others with healthy self-esteem and pride, and is loved by others, and is not afraid when faced with new or difficult tasks.
People with healthy self-esteem and pride can lead a beautiful life, live politely and humbly, and lead a successful life.
For this reason, parents should teach their children how to live with an abundance of healthy self-esteem and pride. you raise your children so that they have healthy self-esteem and pride.

Photo 3-240. A child who has grown up receiving enough love for eye contact, physical contact, and true unconditional love not only loves himself but also loves others and does his best in whatever he does. From an early age, she lives with healthy self-esteem and pride and confidence.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

It is pride to think, evaluate, feel own values ​​and abilities soundly and highly.
Because everyone has healthy self-esteem and pride, they say that there is an existence called “I” and “I am an unparalleled being in this world”.
Having this healthy self-esteem and pride is very important in the lives of children and adults.
Your success in your life can be determined by how much and how powerful you are with healthy self-esteem and pride.
Still, many people live without knowing what healthy self-esteem is.
Children with an abundance of healthy self-esteem know how to love others and receive more love from others.
Healthy self-esteem is a must-have in life.
Having an abundance of healthy self-esteem creates a sense of security in his life by doing his best in whatever he does.
They are not afraid or afraid when they run into new things.

It is common to have a firm mind to solve the new problem and naturally take an attitude to solve the new problem.
On the contrary, people who have unhealthy or damaged self-esteem, who have impaired self-esteem, or who do not have healthy self-esteem, neither know how to love others nor receive love from others.

They are helpless in their daily activities, fear of dealing with strangers, fear of starting new things spontaneously, they can start, but the process of continuing the work can seem awkward.
The efficiency and achievement of school study depend on how rich healthy self-esteem he has. It also greatly affects the degree of growth and maturity. It has a lot of influence on establishing close relationships with peers and friends and having interpersonal relationships with other people.

Photo 3-241. A child who has been brought up with plenty of eye contact love, physical contact love, and unconditional true love grows up with good eye contact and healthy self-esteem and confidence from an early age.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Not only that, but healthy self-esteem has a great influence on setting the direction of a healthy life.
It is common for children to develop these ups and downs of self-esteem normally.
The pride of infant children who grew up receiving enough true unconditional love from their parents is strong.
So they see, touch, feel, think about things around them, and learn from them by feeling what they are.
School-age children and adolescent children with healthy sound self-esteem are not afraid to deal with strangers, are not very suspicious of them, accept them easily, and treat them comfortably. If you have questions about what you feel and think, you tend to ask questions without hesitation and try to find out more.
They are very curious.
It is a personality that is commonly seen in school-age children, adolescent children, and adults with healthy self-esteem.
As they grow up and develop and reach school age, they sometimes start to doubt the current status of one’s self-esteem at home at school and compare one’s own values ​​and abilities with those of other peers.
Sometimes they seriously assess how valuable they are, and whether their abilities and body images are better than their peers’ values, abilities, and body images, or if they are lower than theirs. Depending on the results of the evaluation, some of them may have damaged their healthy self-esteem.
Some adolescent children see their body image negatively and their self-esteem can be damaged.
Sometimes, seeing one’s body image is a significant negative aspects which can damage for selfimmage.
Some adolescent children, who grow up and develop and are sensitive to emotions, react very sensitively to each and every aspect of their body.

Any part of the body that is a little bigger or even a little smaller than that of its peers hurts the trouble and healthy self-esteem. A little fat or a little slimy body can cause a lot of damage  in healthy self-esteem.
Adolescent children naturally have great power to seek independence from their parents and authorities. Such a pursuit of independence arises naturally. Because the effort to seek independence is so powerful, adolescents go anywhere alone. They also try to do something on their own without parental help.
How well adolescent children are received by their peers and friends, and how well they are accommodated, also determines the soundness of their healthy self-esteem and pride. In addition, the ability to seek independence is greatly affected by how healthy self-esteem is.
In order to help their adolescent children grow up with an abundance of healthy self-esteem, parents must also give their adolescent a lot of unconditional true love. This is because true unconditional love from parents becomes the driving force in the life of adolescent children.
Newborns, infants, school-age children, and adolescent children must grow up with true, unconditional love from their parents so that their self-esteem and pride is healthy and strong.
Children with strong self-esteem do their best without being afraid of whatever they do, who they meet, whatever they start with.

Photo 3-242. A child who has received enough love for eye contact lov and physical contact love and has enough true unconditional love has good eye contact and lives with healthy self-esteem and confidence from infancy. And also make good friends.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

If children and adolescent children are raised by their parents who give possessive love, role reversal love, seductive love, vicarious love, healthy self-esteem for them do not develop, If adolescent children who are conditionally loved and raised or who are raised without genuine love can not have healthy self-esteem or their self-esteem is poor and unhealthy. They are timid and fragile, like chicks who just woke up.

Children and adolescents who grow up with the warm and loving eye contact love of their parents, warmly hug, lift, freeze, kiss, and so on children and adolescents who have been raised with full care and trained with love have good self-esteem pride even as adults.

From parents, children received possessive love, role reversal love, seductive love, vicarious love, healthy self-esteem does not develop in adolescent children who are conditionally loved and raised or who are raised without genuine love. and Their self-esteem is poor and unhealthy. They are timid and fragile, like chicks who just woke up.

The pride of children and adolescents who have received enough focused attention love and care while growing up, from birth to growth, is higher, more self-esteem. And it is more comfortable to communicate through conversation.
Parents should usually fill their children’s love tanks with unconditional true love. Only then will their self-esteem become healthier and stronger.

As the love received from the parents in the love tank diminishes, their healthy self-esteem and pride diminish and damages.
In this extremely turbulent world, no matter how busy they live, parents give their children plenty of true, unconditional love, and constantly fill their love tanks with eye contact love, physical contact love, and focused attention love, and care. “you have to say I love you. If you make the words louder often so that,  they can hear them clearly, their self-esteem becomes healthier and stronger.
Parents!
Are you raising your children that way?
Other than that, there are many more things parents need to do to help them develop strong and healthy self-esteem.
For example, even if younger children mislead teamwork in their lives, lose games, learn English at school, they are more faulty than other children, even if they don’t possess special skills, even if they don’t have one arm, you have to truly love without conditions.
For those who receive unconditional love, their healthy self-esteem and pride become higher and richer, and that pride becomes wholesome.
Whether you have one child, two children, or many children, whether they are girls or boys, you must truly love them without condition.
No matter what he does not achieve the best, he should be loved unconditionally and he wll do his best to compliment without hesitation, saying, “Well done.”
They need to be praised so that their self-esteem becomes stronger and healthier.
If you praise them only when they performed superlatively well will,  in most cases they disappoint themselves and their image or self-esteem will be damaged because they cannot do all the time best. Our parents sometimes make mistakes in this regard.
Parents should not spare it to give proper praise even if they did not do well at the highest level.
Their parental love can be well conveyed to them by loving them verbally, through eye contact, physical contact. Such love should be given a lot and a lot every day.
It is really not easy to love and nurture children in children adolescents (0-18 years old). But what could be more unfortunate than having healthy self-respect than having poor children?
You have to pay the price.
What will the joy of having a productive, happy, and wholesome child with lots of pride compare to in this world?
Even if school-age children are not very good at drawing, they should refrain from speaking negatively about the child’s drawing or the child’s drawing.

Photo 3-243. A child who has received enough love for eye contact, love for physical contact, and true unconditional love has a good eye contact love and lives with healthy esteem and confidence from an early age. Make friends well.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 3-244. A child who has received enough eye contact love, physical contact love, and true unconditional love has good eye contact and lives with healthy self-esteem and pride and confidence from an early age. He is well to listen and get the train well.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 3-245. A child who is raised with enough eye contact love,  physical contact love, and true unconditional love has good eye contact love and lives with healthy sound pride and confidence from an early age.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

A positive appreciation and no hesitation for other talents he has will strengthen the child’s healthy self-esteem and pride and be healthy.
When you do something in your daily life, a child who does his best and propaganda to the end must be praised and encouraged by saying, “I am proud of you,” so that he or she will have healthy self-esteem and pride.
Do not hesitate to give him water, do trivial errands, or do school homework, and he should praise him as “well done.”
Clap your hands, hug them, kiss them with good eye contact, and give them proper love through physical contact love in order to create healthy self-esteem and pride for your children.
If they humiliate them in such a way that they can’t do anything like that or can’t do anything like that at your age, their healthy self-esteem and pride is damaged and their hearts hurt.
Some of these trivial words can negatively affect your child’s life.
Parents must be extremely careful about word by word that parents have unknowingly found in parenting.
That said, you shouldn’t be complimenting too much or inappropriately.
Appropriate praise should be given according to time and place. It is appropriate to praise to say “Good job” for school-age children who eat rice and put his rice bowl in the kitchen or clean and clean the room. It would be appropriate to praise it as “thank you.”
Only by listening to the right compliments they accept it and strengthen their self-esteem.
When he has done his best to work but haven’t finished it all or he has done something wrong, you can criticize him intermittently, but you have fully supported him.
However, accusing him of doing something wrong or repressing his child can damage his self-esteem.
In order not to make another mistake in the future, you must point out what is wrong.
Parents also need to set an example for their children so that they can correct what is wrong so that their wholesome self-esteem becomes stronger and healthier.
No matter how young a child maybe, they know whether their parents are truly helping them, sincerely commending them, or making fun of them.
He knows whether he forgives his wrongdoing or simply ignores it.
Children with an abundance of healthy self-esteem make good eye contact and grow up cheerfully with a smile when talking with others.
Children who lack self-esteem do not laugh during conversations with others, do not look at the other person with gentle and good eye contact, and may have good eye contact.
Sometimes during a conversation, he turns his gaze down, to the side, or away from him, making the person he is talking to unpleasant.
What’s even more frightening is that the person you’re talking to is disliked during a conversation, so the person you’re talking to may mistakenly think that he is reluctant to continue the conversation because he thinks he hates him. It also hurts the pride of the person you talk to. What a miserable interpersonal relationship. It is not comfortable to have eye contact with school-age children or adolescent children who lack healthy self-esteem and ride, so it is difficult to communicate with them and make close relationships with them.
Such school-age or adolescent children are prone to unhealthy self-esteem and cannot lead to a smooth social life. Furthermore, we can understand that success in life can also be difficult. It is very important to give your children unconditional true love, but only when they are well trained with love, they will grow and develop well with a lot of healthy self-esteem and ride. You should teach them how to make good eye contact.
While growing up under the parenting, you should observe whether your child has good eye contact every day, and continue to train children to have good eye contact.
You shouldn’t think that you naturally have a good look after birth.
Children who have been trained and raised in this way, even when they are young and grown-up, have good eye contact with others during conversations with others, meet and make a lot of good leaders, great teachers, and good friends, and have healthy sound pride.
It trains them to take responsibility for the actions and consequences they have done so that they have healthy self-esteem and ride.
Help your children participate in teamwork appropriate to their age and abilities and train them to do their best when doing teamwork so that their pride is healthy and strong.
During teamwork, you need to find out what happened to his positive and negative behaviors, and the consequences of those positive or negative behaviors and reinforce negative behaviors into positive behaviors and positive behaviors into more positive behaviors. This is healthy and strengthened.
Other rules of family life must be established fairly, and the family rules established once are educated to obey and trained according to those rules. If the family rules you have established are too strict for the child, or if the child is unable to act according to the rules and is too formal, or if it seems to be improperly set, it should be appropriately modified with a practical family rule to enforce.
Here, too, parents must set an example for their children and take the lead. Only in this way will your growing child’s healthy self-esteem become healthier and stronger.
“Don’t Do As I Do, Do As I Say” Parental training, such as “Do what I say, do not do what I do, but do what I say”, undermines the healthy self-esteem of their children.

What task

Teaching the habit of reading a reference book on a task before planning and carrying out a task is very important, and it teaches that if you study hard, you will get good academic results and your self-esteem will be stronger and stronger. .

Teach them to speak positively, to follow proper etiquette, and to follow their teachings.

It teaches you to keep your promises and not to lie white or red, respect the opinions of others, and teach you to think reasonably, logically, and reasonably when solving something you see, hear.

It is taught that children who are trained to practice these teachings and live mildly, good, and hardworking will have wholesome and healthy self-esteem and ride.

Some parents are left to be depressed even if they do wrong behaviors that are deviating from courtesy, ethics, and morality, and not trained to behave properly.

Children who have not been lovingly trained by their parents for fear of being depressed may grow up without discerning what is right and what is wrong.

Because of that, they will not be able to develop healthy self-esteem and ride and will not be able to enjoy a successful life.

Teach moral ethics of good manners.

If you train them in an inconsistent mother-and-dad family education method where the father commands him to do this and the mother commands him to do that, their hearts, actions, and minds are confused.

Therefore, both parents must train their children uniformly.

No matter how insignificant a young child may say if the parent listens to him and listens to the end, he or she believes that his parents love and respect him. Children know well whether their parents are eager to listen to them or not. When parents listen well, his pride becomes healthier and stronger.

When a child voluntarily says how he spent the day and what happened to himself, don’t just go over it, listen to the end, be interested in what he did and what happened to him.

Be healthy.

Give the child an opportunity to present his or her opinion at a family meeting and listen to his or her opinion.

Even if you disagree with the parent’s opinion, even if the child’s opinion is wrong, respecting the child’s opinion creates healthy self-esteem and ride.

We all live in a limited time. They live 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. There are countless things to do within a given amount of time in life.

We must set priorities in life, schedule timelines according to them, and spend time appropriately for our children who are the top priorities for us.

You should spend at least 10 to 30 minutes or just a few minutes with one child 24 hours a day. While spending time with a child, you should take the opportunity to think about the problems that are happening in his life.

In this way, while parents and children spend time together, you need to give the focused attention love, and pride so that he or she can feel that he or she is the most important child in the world.

By spending time like this and giving him focused attention love and care, he can reveal to his parents his secrets that his child has deeply cherished.

It is a good opportunity to have a serious conversation between parents and children when they give such focused attention lover and care.

By a focused attention love with him through physical contact with the warm eyes contact love of his parents, he can fill the love tank with his parents’ love, strengthen, his healthy self-esteem, and give him the power to live positively.

When a child messes with his or her room with books, paper, pencils, toys, clothes, etc., instead of training by saying “Why don’t you clean up the room” by using the subject “you”, use the subject “I” am seeing that room is unpleasant.” Or, if you train by saying “no,” it will less damage the child’s self-esteem.

When adolescents ask for their parents’ opinions about their future career choices, their self-esteem is reinforced only when they see positively about the career they choose and go in favor of the choice.

The child’s future job the parents were hoping for was to become a doctor, but when the child decides to become an elementary school teacher, he must accept the child’s future job as positively as possible and select it according to his will to help him become a teacher. Your child’s self-esteem will be healthy.

It trains them to take responsibility for the good books they need and to take care of their own possessions.

Parents should not throw away or take toys, books, or other possessions without their children’s permission.

Saying contempt, such as the fat, lean, lazy, or idiot, loser, damages his healthy self-esteem and pride. No matter how young they are, they are independent human beings. Parents cannot own children, nor are parents owned, children.

You should never force your children to obey their will just because they think they are interesting and like them.

This love is called possessive love.

This kind of love is false love and is a great cause of damage to a child’s healthy self-esteem and pride.

If they grow up with such love, they will not develop healthy self-esteem, and even a little healthy self-esteem will be greatly damaged.

When the child is planning to do something, find out if the work and plan are appropriate, and if appropriate, help him or her to perform the task successfully, and if any problems arise while doing it, work with parents as needed.

If possible, train them not to start working full of fractions and abilities from the beginning, and when doing big things, do not rush to achieve goals within a short amount of time. Teach that there is also away.

 Photo 3-246. A child who is raised with enough love for eye contact, love for physical contact, and true unconditional love has a good eye contact love and lives with healthy sound self-esteem and pride and confidence from an early age.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

If he works without a plan , he mayfails to complete it or fail in the middle, his healthy self-esteem can be damaged. On the contrary, the successful resolution of the task can result in healthy self-esteem and pride.

Find out what was difficult and easy to solve a task, and if you could do almost the same thing over and over again, look for other ways to do it.

When he does work, parents shouldn’t be involved from start to finish and do it entirely.

These days, about 6% of pre-adolescent school-age children and adolescent children in the United States are being treated with mental stabilizers and neuropsychiatric stimulants for attention deficit disorder, hyperactivity disorder, depression, behavioral disorder, and stress.

Teach children and adolescents how to deal with stress on their own with such problems.

Teach them how to have the power to challenge all the problems of life, and love and advocate for them without spared praise and support for their abilities.

If you feel that heor she is afraid of something or is incapable of doing it, do not force him to continue, but help him do other things.

Teach them to be interested in what they think they can do, out of a range of things or activities. It also encourages themm to do new things that are less stressful and challenging.

If he is still under stress, help him relieve stress with physical exercise, deep breathing exercises, or other means, and parents show him how to relieve stress

The home should be the most enjoyable and comfortable haven, home, and learning place for the child.

It should be a sweet home. Nevertheless, these days, parents have a fashionable divorce, an unpleasant divorce, a divorce to live happily, a twilight divorce or a separate life, and their young children have lost their shelter.

As I planted, it is worth at least once to think about the consequences of forgetting the causal relationship and living alone after the age of 57.

Make sure you eat three meals a day regularly with balanced, nutritious foods. You get the energy and nutrients from breakfast to do your job well for the day. Therefore, it is taught that breakfast is very important for three meals a day. Do proper physical exercise regularly, teach not to smoke, and even parents do not smoke. Show and teach how to live healthily.

It teaches them to take responsibility for their actions and consequences, respect others as mine, do not disrespect children, the poor or the elderly, and do not discriminate against them. If you don’t like 3Ds (dirty, difficult, dangerous) work, teach others not to do it.

Photo 3-247. Children who are raised with eye contact love, physical contact love, and true unconditional love have good eye contact love and live with healthy self-esteem and pride, and confidence from an early age.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

It teaches how to do laundry, how to clean, how to organize bills, how to use checks (personal checks), how to throw out trash, how to cook, etc.

Teach things.

Children who are trained in this way develop healthy and healthy self-esteem and pride both mentally and physically.

If they don’t know, of course, they are afraid of everything.

It teaches that drinking, smoking, and addictive substance abuse negatively affect the body, mind, and social life in general and not be involved.

Meet and contact your child’s teachers frequently to find out how he or she is studying at school, how he or she lives and builds his or her healthy self-esteem and pride.

Have parents or only children participate in various events, sports, dramas, and concerts that take place in the area, volunteer, and develop healthy pride through other extracurricular activities.

The environment and conditions of the study room are appropriately created so that students can study hard, and they regularly do homework, preparation, and review at a certain time, and when they study, they help answer questions within a certain limit but do not do their homework instead of children. It teaches the way to study voluntarily rather than studying at the academy.

Let your children learn and develop healthy self-esteem at the library, at secondary school or college, or at Sunday school.

Never say anything that compares to his or her brothers, sisters, relatives, or neighbors.

Comparing your children to other children suggests that they are better than you and that you are worse than them. How bad will your heart be and his healthy self-esteem and pride will be damaged?

Assuming that the child is incapable of doing so, parents should not do his job all over for him.

There are many things the child can do on his or her own without parental help. Parents often conclude that he can’t do it and without having to get started. Some parents force adult sons and daughters to do this, even after they become adults.

 Suppose that you grew up having never done anything yourself. What grief for this.

 Can you find healthy self-esteem and pride in adults who grew up tied to the parenting of such parents?

How can a child raised under such parents go through the world alone and have sound pride?

It enhances their self-esteem by teaching them where their ancestors’ roots came from and to feel good in their roots.

Rich and healthy self-esteem is essential for children’s growth and development and success, and positively affects daily life at home or school, and positively affects school study, athletic ability, and relationships with peers. It is easy to see how important parental love is.

In addition, healthy self-esteem gives you a wealth of ability to keep yourself away from smoking, substance abuse, alcohol, and teenage pregnancy, and to challenge yourself to do something soundly, and it influences you to develop an amicable personality and to judge positively.

In order for a child to develop wholesome healthy self-esteem and pride, they must be immersed in true unconditional love. They must be trained and raised with love. Their love tanks must be filled with true unconditional parental love so that they fill their love tank with parental love. Without parental unconditional love and genuine love and help, children cannot have rich and wholesome healthy self-esteem and pride.

A child’s future and success depend on his parents’ true unconditional love.

The following is an example of a question-and-answer on Internet pediatric and adolescent health counseling on “I think I lack self-esteem”.

Q&A. I think she lacks self-esteem.

Q. My child is a 10-year-old girl, and I’m worried because she doesn’t seem to have any pride.

What should I do?

Thank you. Youngkyung Dream

Lee Saek

That’s a good question. See information on nurturing healthy self-esteem in children above.

If you have any further questions, please contact us. Thank you. Lee Sang-won Lee, MD

 

24.Communication Between of wife and husband and A letter to My Dear Husband ….169

As a means of communication, there are two types as Language and Actions.

You can talk only by means of words(language).

You can communicate only as a means of action.

Sometimes there are two ways to communicate such as say and do.

Having a quiet time without saying anything is one of the means of conversation.

Listening intently during conversation is a kind of conversational tool.

The wife cooks the oods which  her husband likes, and  giving each other to eat, is a kind of communication.

A wife or a husband buying foods and eating together is a kind of communication.

Sending one rose or 12 roses, sending a card or a gift after remembering a birthday, and sending a card or a gift on a wedding anniversary are also means of conversation.

When people meet each other, they laugh, shake hands, and hug. This is also a means of communication.

Laughing out loudly, loving each other through eye contact love, and loving each other through physical contact with a lightly raised hand on the shoulder are also means of communication.

Loving couples sitting close to each other, hugging and kissing, touching and loving with their hands are also a form of gesture communication.

Some women hold their hands tightly when shaking hands, while others shake hands with their wide-open palms without holding their hands.

Some men shake hands by holding their hands tight enough to almost break. Some women hug as soon as the handshake is over, while others do not.

Such handshakes and hugs are a kind of physical communication.

Once received, the good eye contact love of a woman can be unforgettable for the whole life.

Such eye contact love is also one of the means of communication.

All these means of communication by action can have a far more powerful effect on marital relationships and affect the lives of our daily lives than thousands of beautiful words.

When raising children, parents should not forget to often say ‘I LOVE YOU’ in word communication.

In addition, you should love them with appropriate physical contact, such as a hug,  and lightly place your hand on their shoulder.

Again, such love is often needed between couples.

Some couple can naturally love their wife, husbands, and children this way.

Some couples do not know how to make good eye contact love or physical contact love to their wives, husbands, children, and others.

Such couples should learn how to love each other.

Couples must learn how to love each other, parents how to love children, and how to love others.

We are all born with the nature to love others.

You need to learn how to consciously make good eye contact love with others.

You should learn how to love your spouse, partner, offspring, or another person with proper physical contact love.

You shouldn’t learn how to love, and you shouldn’t wait for a lot of natural love and a happy and smooth spouse in your married life.

The athlete who won the gold medal in the Olympic Games has practiced and trained in bloody tears.

Couples must learn how to truly love each other unconditionally.

There is a love phrase like this in The Song of Solomon.

“You want me to kiss because your love is better than wine.”

“My dear, you are pretty and pretty. Your eyes are like doves.”

“I am Sharon’s daffodil and lily of the valley.”

“My beloved belongs to me, and I belong to him… … .”

“My love, you are pretty and pretty… … .”

“Drops of honey drip from your lips and honey and milk are under my

tongue … .”

“My dear, how beautiful you are, how bright you are, makes me happy.”

“Your mouth will be like fine wine… … .”

It is part of a love dialogue in the Song of Songs.

Marriage life will be smooth if the couples communicate with each other while expressing these beautiful love phrases in the words and the body language frequently.

Unrequited love, heartbreak, breakup, broken heart, rebellion against forced marriage, the praise of love, long breakup after marriage, couple breakup and abandonment, and descriptions of weddings are also written on love.

Emotions and sorrows always exist between humans. These emotions and sorrows must be resolved through love dialogue.

We must understand, forgive, and accept joy and sadness, good and bad things through intermarriage dialogue.

For this reason, he says, “Sex is not the most important thing among the important things to maintain a smooth marital life and conversation.”

There are 8,540 minutes per week.

Among them, it can be assumed that a total of 210 minutes are spent on sex. However, there will be much more time for active conversation between the couple.

In fact, it is said that sex between the marital couple is one of the most enjoyable means of communication.

If a couple lives with the desire to break up, live a separate life, and divorce at any time, how will the marriage be successful?

Marriage promises are not promises of young children who play in childhood.

Don’t think of it as a promise made by irresponsible people these days.

If married couples are unable to solve their problems through conversation, they should seek professional counseling.

Among the means of communication is the means of action.

It has already been explained that lovemaking between couples is also a form of behavioral communication.

 Some say that the husband tells his wife, “Let’s go into the bedroom and talk to him” instead of telling his wife to go into the bedroom and “let’s make love.”

“The Letter To you my dear husband”

To you, dear!

Let us both love each other and live happily.

Please tell me often that you love me, kiss me, hug me tight, and love me with your eyes.

If you don’t say “I love you”, you don’t hug me tight, you don’t hug, you don’t kiss me, how can I know you really love me.

Sometimes I wonder if you really love me.

“I love you.” Please tell me often.

Please kiss me, hug me tight, and love me a lot with your loving eyes.

Even if I look absurd because you need me, sometimes if you don’t accept the true love you give, don’t accept it.

Please say “I love you” often a lot.

And hug me a lot.

Please hug me hard and kiss me a lot.

Even if what I’m doing seems awkward to you, even if you don’t like it, praise “well done”.

Don’t scold me for what I’ve done wrong, don’t despise it, fix what’s wrong, and encourage me to do well.

Give positive praise for what I did well.

If I fail, please convince me and encourage me to have sound confidence.

Don’t take it for granted that I do everything for you.

When I repeat to make certain things clear, be grateful, and reinforce positively.

Let me know when you are lonely or hurt.

I will comfort you too.

When I think I have the ability to comfort you, I get stronger mentally and physically.

Any emotional problems we have, or anger, can be ruined and ruined in our marriages if we do not address them through dialogue.

Remember.

Even if I truly love you unconditionally, I can’t always know all the thoughts and feelings, stress, and anger that you hold deep in your heart.

If you have any good thoughts and feelings, please tell me.

If you take care of the good and bad things that I keep deep in my heart, the life of our couple will be energized.

I don’t know how wonderful it is to celebrate our personal day on a birthday or any other day.

When we give and receive gifts of love for no reason or when we hear you say you love me, our marriages are full of vitality.

If I see and feel something for me it is my experience and it is also important and true to me.

Judge me easily and don’t listen to them with preconceptions.

Listening to or seeing right is a very important couple conversation.

Of course, changes will come in the marriage between the two of us.

I keep thinking that we are helping each other.

Touch me with your hands, hold me up, hug me.

It is also important to say that I love you, but if you love me through non-verbal communication and contact me with love, it will energize me.

Please respect me even when I am quiet sometimes without speaking.

When I need spiritual time to solve my problems, sometimes I need a quiet moment.

Help others understand that I am a worthy human being.

When people know that the two of us love each other this way, I can be special and I feel proud.

I am very happy when we share with others that our marriage is happy.

It is wrong to consciously think about these thoughts every day between loving couples and think that true marital love naturally works well without love.

Among them, in a healthy couple’s love relationship, a healthy conversation between couples is the cornerstone of the family.

 

 

25. Hugging…………………………………..174

 

Hugging clears the gloomy heart.

It activates the immune system function that can overcome various diseases to the best.

Hugging allows fresh oxygen to flow into tired cells in the whole body.

Hugging rejuvenates the tired and old mind and the body.

Hugging every day strengthens the bonding of love between couples and eliminates conflicts and fatigue between couples.

Physical contact love through hugging promotes the production of hemoglobin and promotes the production of vital energy in life. (Source: Dr. Harold Voth and Helen Colton’s hugging)

The couple hugs a lot.

Parents have to hug their children a lot and raise them.

Hug close friends and relatives appropriately and often.

 

Photo 111. Marriage and hugs of young people

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

When meeting a friend, if you hug him warmly and appropriately, a hug will like each other.

A proper hug is an amazing vitality and facilitator for life.

A hug is a powerful panacea and relieves stress.

There are no side effects.

Hug tablets have a long-lasting medicinal effect and a strong therapeutic effect.

Even excessive hugs do not cause side effects.

If hug may have problems, you can become addicted.

One thing you can’t stop with once started is the side effect of hug tablets.(Source: By Dr. Voth and Colton)

Many children have a love deficit.

The special drug that can cure the deficiency of love is also the hugging tablet and physical contact love.

Picture 112. One day, the father is hugging his daughter and his daughter is hugging her father.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 113. A daughter hugs her father eating birthday cake.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Love deficiency can be treated with a “Hug tablets at least 4X a day” regimen.

During World War II, a war orphanage A group in England were provided enough foods to orphans, but the care of the nanny did not go far enough. They couldn’t give them enough love for physical contact love and eye contact love.

Other World War II, a war orphanages B group could not be given enough food, but they were given enough love for physical contact love and eye contact love.

As a result, some studies have shown that the orphans in Orphanage B were much healthier mentally and physically than the orphans in Orphanage A.

Picture 114. One day, a dad hugs his teenage son and a daughter

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

In recent years, most full-time double-income parents have not been able to provide enough loving eye contact love, warm physical contact love, and focused attention love, and care for their infants, as well as school-age children and even adolescents.

Today, the incidence of infant colic, anger attacks, sleep problems, allergic dermatitis, hyperactivity disorder, attention deficit disorder, enuresis, constipation, seizures, migraine, and depression among many infants and toddlers have been on the rise.

Many adolescent children these days are said to be fearless, violent, scary, and disgusting. They commit various wrongdoings, including gang membership, drug addiction, teenage pregnancy, drinking, runaway, school refusal, bullying, rebellion against authorities, teachers or parents, suicide, depression, criminal acts, and prostitution.

There are phenomena that cannot see the end.

Why?

There are many reasons, but they are said to arise from growing up in a world where they do not receive enough true unconditional love from their parents, are not trained in love from their parents and social state, and have no example. Of course not all.

Fortunately, most adolescent children grow up healthy in happy, stable homes. In particular, warm glance, love, and warm hugs relieve stress and make them healthy for both children and adults.

On the contrary, teenagers who grew up not receiving enough affection and love from their parents through proper physical contact love are said to add uncontrollable delinquency.

Lovemaking and sex do not mean the same thing.

Today, many men and women say they only love sex rather than love.

Love, mind, and body, always become one.

However, some sex mainly stops at penis satisfaction.

In true love, there must be tenderness, a warm heart to cherish, and to share everything with each other, to have fun together, to worry and share, and to have close physical contact.

We must love and believe each other unconditionally and love without lies.

Hugging follows.

Ling and Lee, released from a prison northeast in 2009, do you know what they first did when they arrived at a California airfield and met her husband and four-year-old daughter?

The daughter, the husband, and Ling here, three of them sat down and hugged each other.

Hug your children a lot and raise them.

Hug it appropriately.

 

 

20.The short course in human relationship…216

I was wrong.

I was wrong, please forgive me.

You did well.

You did a good job.

I want to know your opinion.

What is your opinion?

May I help you?

Can I help you?

Thank you.

“You or I”.

Original author-unknown

The more we say this kind of words during our lives, the healthier we can live, the happier we can live, and the better our interpersonal relationships will be.

If you are wrong, how important it is to ask for forgiveness and receive forgiveness.

How good it is also to give encouragement and praise for doing well for what others have done well.

How good it is to have a life attitude that listens to others and learns, rather than just making my opinion and arguments and saying that I am the best in the world.

How good it would be to be a person who sacrifices for others rather than people who think that only I should live well and be comfortable and happy.

How nice it is to be a person who knows how to be grateful for small things and everything, as well as for the very trivial and small things that others have done to me.

How good it is to not forget the grace of your parents and siblings and live with gratitude.

It is good to have a grateful mind, but how good it is to raise your children so that they can respond with words and writings.

How good it is to live with an interpersonal relationship that respects “you” without proposing the word “I” as much as possible.

How nice is it for kids and adults to say more of these words and live by doing what they said?

Dear readers!

How about teaching your children to live with a lot of these words on a regular basis?

If you say goodbye when you greet in usual occation and you greet too in special occasions, your path to success will be open widly.

21. What is Chung-So-Nyoun( Youth)?

Whether or not pre-adolescent children want to become adults, they must cross the “adolescent bridge”.

The world of adolescent children is called “adolescent world.”

While pre-adolescent children cross the puberty bridge and live in the “adolescent world,” with a variety of adolescent problems, large and small, are common.

 Some of the problems of adolescent children shake up the global village.

Perhaps some of the adolescent children have come to this world and cannot go quietly. In fact, most of the problems in adolescent children are normal that arise from the normal growth and development range of adolescent children.

Even so, not everyone has a good understanding of adolescents and their world and regards them as having problems.

For example, these days, in the US or in Korea, “Middle school and high school girls prefer to wear super short skirts. There is no problem with them wearing such short skirts, but older generations are having trouble with them.

This kind of problem can be called “adolescent disease”.

When dealing with the problems of these and that adolescent children, the term “adolescent children”, “teenage children”, or “youth” is commonly used.

Among them, the word “youth” is used more particularly.

Let me introduce some of the head line words in follwing paragraph on  Chung So Yeon by koearea laguage in the USA- Korean Media in past few months

“Youth house head, youth runaway problem, youth leadership, youth soccer tournament, cynical sweet words that communicate with youth, free hotline for youth peer counseling, Korean youth, how to prevent youth derailment, youth experts, parents with youth, wrong youth, Korean teenagers drunk driving greatly, Korean teenagers are distorted after drinking alcohol, idols of teenagers, popular singers who are idols of teenagers, how to spread positive anger to teenagers who avoid military service, sexual education for teenagers”, etc. are some of the headlines of articles related to “youth” that have been dealt with in the past few months by major Korean daily newspapers in the US and Korean newspapers in the US.

Difficult Hangul(Korean):

·         Children and adolescents (0-18 years old) from then on before entering adulthood, depending on their age, development stage, or convention

·         newborn baby,

·         Infant (乳兒),

·         Infant (幼兒),

• Toddlers
• School Age Child,

·         Boys,

·         Girls,

·         Adolescent Child,

·         Sip-dae ,

·         Teenagers ,

·         Child and Adolescent,

·         chung-so-yen,

·         junior.

However, it is difficult to find literature that clearly explains the definition of such words above.

Among them, adolescents, in particular, are words commonly used by the public in Korean media, pedagogical circles, politicians, and even pediatrics, but we cannot find clearly defined literature.

Since how old do you say “child”,

From what age to what age do people belong to youth.

Teenager?

child?

Infant?

What about the children?

Newborn?

What about children?

What about adolescent kids?

Teens?

What about children and adolescents?

It seems that there must be a definition of the word such as.

So, let’s look at the meaning of youth here.

table. Defination of Korean youth according to age and provisions of related laws regarding them

Youth Protection Act	Youth are under the age of 18 years old It regulates the entry and exit of youth into harmful environments
Minor Protection Act	Minors are under the age of 20 years old. Minors are not allowed to drink, smoke, or enter entertainment establishments. Entertainment business owners should not allow minors to enter.
Customs Business Regulations	Persons under the age of 18 shall not work as workers in entertainment businesses ordered by Presidential Decree in customs business offices. if you are 18 years of age or older, you can be hired as a receptionist
Youth Basic Law	Youth is 9 years to 24 years old

Source- Hankook Ilbo, March 19, 1997

Note- “ Instead of using the word adolescent as much as possible, the phrase “adolescents” or “teenages” is mainly used. However, to improve readers’ understanding and in Korean pediatrics, instead of the word pediatric, the term pediatrics or adolescents is used as necessary.

The media and media of the Korean American Korean community often use the word “youth” a lot. What is “youth”?

Dr. Hoi-Seung Lee’s Hangeul dictionary of the contents of “youth” articles covered by the media were related to “teenagers (13-19 years old) or adolescent children (8-9 years old to 18 years old)”.

According to the dictionary definition, children aged 9-12 belong to adolescents, but there was no article related to them.

And there wasn’t a single article about young adults aged 18 to 24.

As already explained above, it was defined as “adolescents, both young adults and young boys and girls”.

By age, the dictionary has defined the age group of about 14 to 24 years old as adolescents. And they defined boys who are neither very young nor completely mature as boys.

Whole life stages can be classified as newborn, infancy, infancy, school-age chidren, young adulthood (adolescence), adulthood, and old age.

In particular, children and adolescents (ages 0-18) include newborns, infants, infants, school-age children, and adolescent children.

 Parents, families, schools, society, and the state enact policies and laws related to education, prevention, disease, social welfare projects, health care, sex education, etc., corresponding to these categories, and protect the welfareof children and youth in accordance with the policies and laws. It is imperative to make a plan for this, and to push forward and implement the plan.

 Whether it is based on age, growth or development, or pediatric science, the word youth is ambiguous and ambiguous.

In addition, it is often used so that it is impossible to discern what the will of children is, what is the will of children, and the will of adolescents. In addition, the word youth itself does not fit the sense of the times. Even in many medians, these types of words are not covered with certainty, so they are all confused.

The Department of Pediatrics and Adolescents should not use the word youth.

Instead, children aged 13 to 19 are converted to teenagers,

Children from 8 to 9 years old to around 18 years old, that is, children of the age group starting and ending puberty,

Adolescent children who can produce children,

Minors based on legal age, usually under 18,

Young people over the age of legal age, usually over 18, can be referred to as adults.

Here, the age at which puberty begins is 8 to 12 to 13 years, depending on each individual, and the age to end is 18 to 21 years.

 In other words, appropriate words should be effectively and appropriately written for children’s age, growth and development, and laws of each country. It is possible to use the word adolescent by grouping children and young adults into one age group, but it cannot be used properly.

As long as you know for sure, Inje should stop using the word “youth” anymore and use other appropriate words.

Children in the growing and developing age group are called children or “children”, and those in the physically mature age group are adults.

It is contradictory to group children and young adults who continue to develop and develop into a group and plan health plans for various policies regarding them.

In the meantime, I have been doing youth projects and policies continuously and actively, but I can ask what is the problem?

In fact, even in the medical field, there was no distinction in the past between adults in the age group corresponding to the internal medical treatment area and children belonging to the pediatric age group.

In fact, there were general practitioners who looked at pediatric patients and adult patients of all ages without distinction from specialized treatment such as internal medicine and pediatrics. However, in the past there have been no big problems.

There was a time when newborns, infants, infants, school-age children, or adolescents were simply used as a whole, regardless of age group.

That was then, and in the cyber age now, the problem is very different.

A 22-year-old patient may fall under the juvenile age group, but cannot be admitted to the US hospital pediatrics under hospital law.

In order to better understand children and help them more effectively, non-medical practitioners should choose appropriate medical terms that can separate the age group of children and adolescents (ages 0-18) from adults in the age group of 18 years or older.

Nevertheless, it is very wrong to combine the age group of children and the age group of young adults in one word, adolescent.

First, according to the dictionary, Boys and girls aged about 8 to 18 years old  and young men and women aged 18 to 24 years old are belong to the youth group. In summary, some of elementary school students, most of middle and high school students and college students, and some of graduate students fall under the youth age group. Of course, all teenagers and adolescents belong to youth group.

Second, adolescent children under the age of 18 who are growing and developing mentally and physically also belong to the youth group.

However, they are legally minors. On the contrary, young adults aged 18 to 24 years old, or adults, who have grown and developed almost mentally and physically, also fall under youth group. However, they are clearly legally of adulthood.

Children between the ages of 8 and 18 years of age have difficulty living in social, economic and legal independence. They are minors and belong to youth group.

However, young adults in the age group 18 to 24 can legally marry, have children, and live independently from their parents by being economically and socially independent.

In this way, difficulties can arise in national policies dealing with issues such as well-being, their health, disease, and prevention by tying up children, groups and adults after 18 years of age, which are very different in terms of growth and development and legal, in one word, adolescents.

Third, in the age group from 8 to 18 years old, it is a mistake to call pre-adolescent children, adolescent children, and young adults between 18 and 24 years old as adolescents.

Nevertheless, for a long period of 16 years between 8 and 24 years, children and adults are called adolescents, prevent them from causing problems, and deal with problems that have already arisen efficiently. It is not suitable for the sense of the times and there are many contradictions in many ways.

Suppose you have a youth sex education seminar on adolescent sexual issues.

Will focus on early adolescent children in the 8-13 age group when setting the subject of sex education prior to a youth sex education seminar, or middle-aged or late adolescent children in the 13–18 age group? Will you focus on sex education, focus on youth in the age group 18 to 24 years old, adults, or will you focus on youth in all age groups between 8 and 24 years old? The sex education speaker will have to decide.

It is easy for anyone to understand that the method and content of pediatric sex education for children attending elementary, middle and high school should never be the same as the method and content of adult sex education for adults aged 18 to 24 years old.

Many contradictions are found when reading articles about youth, for example.

Instead of calling the age group of children aged 8 to 24 for about 16 years and adults belonging to the youth group 18 years or older as a whole, words that fit the current sense and are appropriate for their age group and stage of development-adolescent children, teenagers , Teenagers, minors, young people, adults, etc. I think you should choose and use words appropriately.

Let’s stop using the word youth now.

 Instead, it is appropriate to use other words that are appropriate to prevent and solve their problems.

Instead of just calling them children, if you use appropriate words wisely, such as newborns, infants, toddlers, school-age children or school-age children, adolescent children, and teenagers, it will be of great help in raising children and a great help in the national welfare policy. Will be

For reference, it is said that the word “pediatrics” is used instead of pediatrics in Korea.

 I wonder if newborns 0-28 days old and infants under the age of 1 also belong to the Pediatrics Department. It is also troublesome to find and write the right words.

Sources and references

 

28.Teen runaways………201

What is the runaway of teen?

Chidren between the ages of 13 and 19 years old are said to be teenagers or teen.

A teenage child before the age of 18 is defined as running away from his or her home for at least one evening without the permission of a parent or guardian.

It is not referred to as runaway when younger children than 13 years-old or mentally sick weakened children have left their homes and are unable to find their homes and are unable to enter their homes for at least a day or longer.

In the US, it is said that one million teenage children ran away every year, and in Korea, 100,000 to 120,000 children run away every year. The by age, adolescents and teens aged 12 to 13 ran away the most (Source: Mudeung Ilbo, February 7, 2002).

Causes and motivations of teenage children to run away

·         To adventure

·         Because living in his own house is not fun.

·         Angry and mad

·         When dissatisfied with parents

·         Sometimes they run away when they are unpleasant because of what happened at home or at school, and they can run away even when nothing is unpleasant.

·         When they are afraid of scolding from their parents for poor school performance

·         When they are afraid of being admonished by a teacher for doing wrong studying

·         When they can’t really follow the school curriculum

·         When parents don’t love, when they love conditionally, when they love wrong

·         When parents are overly authoritative

·         When discord arises between parents and children

·         When brothers are jealous

·         When they don’t want to go to school

·         When they actually did bad behavior,

·         When there is really no fact of bad behavior, but the parents suspect that they did it.

·         Because of the illusion that they would go somewhere without their parents’ knowledge, and that if their children were not there, they would find themselves in anxiety or that their parents would want to see them and find them.

·         They think they were treated unfairly

·         When  they think they have been treated maliciously by society

·         To form a gang by running away with a few like-minded peers

·         When they have the urge to live a more fun and adventurous life than to live a futile life

·         To earn money to help parents or siblings

·         In order to live better in economic independence

·         To see the world

·         When they have incest sex, especially when they are sexually abused by his or her natural parents or stepparents

·         When a mother induces or pressures her daughter to become the target of her father’s love instead of herself

·         When love is rejected by mother

·         When he get kicked out of the house

·         Poverty, child abuse, family destruction, impulsive personality.

·         And many more

Current status of runaway teenage children 

Teenage girls running away from home can engage in prostitution in order to live.

Teenage boys who run away from home do not call their parents to say they are embarrassed if they do not succeed, and do not disclose where they are. They can join a gang or get hired for a low wage to work hard.

It is possible to live with runaway teenagers who agree with each other or with teenagers who have the same motives or problems.

Most of the teenage children who run away do not tell the truth about their motives.

When a parent or school authority and a teenage child dispute each other over the limits of liability that caused the problem when they ran away from school due to problems arising from the relationship between parents and children or between school and students, in most cases, teenage children.  They may run away because they feel that they cannot pass the blame for the problem to their parents or school authorities.

Most of the teenage children who run away from home for a day or two, spend with other teenage friends, and return home are mentally normal. However, most of the teens who run away from home multiple times or those in their teens who run away repeatedly may have mental problems.

Most of the teenage children who run away from home are homeless. 75% of them engage in criminal offenses and 50% engage in prostitution. They have other serious mental problems. 50% of them have experienced child abuse and sexual abuse. Most of them have health problems other than mental problems. You may have hepatitis or sexually transmitted diseases, and it is common to abuse drugs. They tend to visit free health clinics frequently.

Treatment and countermeasures for teenage runaway children 

Most teenage children who run away due to problems arising from the relationship between parents and teenage children, school authorities and teenage students, and relationships with teenage peers do not require special counseling treatment or treatment, but their relationship to each other should be improved.

If they run away from school because they don’t want to go to school, reevaluate whether the school curriculum is appropriate for the teen child, and change the curriculum to suit him or her.

If necessary, they can study while receiving vocational training.

Special education is given on dating, sex, marriage, responsibility, independence, and future jobs.

If you have a close relationship with your teenage child and father or mother, resolve them.

Adolescents, parents and the entire family find out and resolve the motives for running away through appropriate counseling treatment.

Re-evaluate the overall family life.

Parents are overly authoritative to know if they are raising their teenage children, and if they have raised them, then raise them properly.

Teenagers who run away from home are more likely to be arrested for committing offenses before or after they reach legal adulthood.

After reaching adulthood, the rate of divorce is high and there is a high rate of mental problems. Treat it appropriately.

It arranges a residence for runaway teenage children in groups, under state responsibility, so that they can make frequent contact with their families.

Provide them with appropriate education and vocational training so that they can live as constructive members of society. However, most of the teenage children who have run away from home for a long period of time cannot successfully live at home and repeat criminal acts.

What to do with the home or parents of teenage children who run away

Finding out the motives and reasons for running away is the first task parents should do.

Most of the teenage children who try to run away from home for their own future or to help their families are conscientious, hardworking, and entrepreneurial.

Emphasizing and training the importance of starting a business while living with parents and families is important and requires adequate education, financial support and other preparation.

Running away for adventure makes family life more fun, helps you to join club activities, and makes you more active in community service.

Parents who know that his well-being will be in jeopardy if he runs away should never tell a teenage child, “If you want to run away, leave the house” to a teenager who tells his parents that he will run away.

Teens will be angrier when parents say that.

Some teenagers leave the house with anger and then return after the anger subsides.

You must love them a lot so that true unconditional love can be well conveyed to your children.

If there is a problem while studying at school, the curriculum is reevaluated and education is tailored to his ability and aptitude.

You can’t prevent runaway by being overly accused, trained in corporal punishment, or trained in a way that urges you not to do so or embarrassing you.

No more meeting peers who ran away from home.

They understand their teenage children who return from home and get professional help as much as possible.

It also takes a long time to improve life security, psychotherapy, adoption, appropriate education, substance abuse treatment, general health problem solving, and problems with parents and relationships.

Runaway teens provide free calls to parents, family members, or protection authorities at the national level when they need them, so that runaway child can call their parents, relatives, and protection authorities anytime, anywhere get help over the phone.

For various reasons, teenage runaway children who cannot return to their homes find adopted parents and arrange for adoption, group life, or independent living.

If necessary, receive appropriate diagnostic treatment from a doctor and seek economic assistance from the state with the help of social workers.

29.Adolescent prostitutes/Juvenile prostitutes)…….228

Prostitution

Having sex at a price of any kind is called prostitution.

adolescent child prostitution, or prostitution by adolescent children are also called adolescent prostitutes.

Here, the word adolescent prostitute is not equivalent to the word juvenile prostitutes, but it is seen as an analogy.

This is because the youth age group includes boys and girls and young adults under the age of 24 years-old.

The causes and motives of prostitution in adolescent children

·         The motives and causes of prostitution by adolescent children are complex.

·         Adolescent children lacking sex values,

·         Adolescent children with social and/or family problems,

·         Some of the adolescent children who have been abused by pedophilia engage in prostitution.

·         It is common for depressed adolescent children and depressed adolescent girls to have emotional problems.

·         Runaway teenage children,

·         Adolescent children with economic problems,

·         Mental retardation adolescent children,

·         Some of the children in families whose home function is broken also engage in prostitution.

·         As a way of expressing anger, negative behaviors such as prostitution, alcohol, runaway, drug addiction, runaway, assault, aggressive behavior, and refusal to attend school are sometimes used.

 As a way of expressing anger, they can lead to burglar acts of invading and stealing houses, and other symptoms of depression. And they can engage in prostitution as a way to express their anger.

 Some of the adolescent children who grew up not fully trained with unconditional true love and right love from their parents are likely to fall under the control of human groups who have no interest in the well-being and peace of others and in the future, and who are only concerned with their self-interest. There are cases in which prostitution is practiced under the control of a group of human beings who are only in need of self-interest.

 In particular, adolescent children with moderate or severe depression may lose the ability to think reasonably and develop a wide range of thinking disorders. Because of this, they abuse habitual drugs, fall into alcoholism, be assaulted, engage in prostitution, criminal acts, or even commit suicide etc

Countermeasures against prostitution in adolescent children

Most adolescent children who engage in prostitution tend to continue prostitution. Prostitution on its own can make them more mentally depressed, lose your wholesome self-esteem, and become weaker and weaker physically. They can get infectious sexually transmitted diseases, and when they get pregnant and have a baby, the suffer more and become socially isolated.

It is easy to get into a group that is not interested in human well-being and happiness, rights and love, affection, and sympathy at all and is only interested in self-interest.

Photo 2-26. Young children have fear of beasts such as bears and tigers, and there is separation anxiety that they will be separated into parents.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 2-27. Children have fear of beasts such as tigers, fear of their parent’s separation, divorce or death, fear of being bullied at school, not being able to follow school studies or fear of being violated by gangsters, and fear of dying from sickness.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

In order to guide them so that they can lead social life with productive and sound healthy self-esteem and pride, it is necessary to solve them at the national level, such as food, clothing, shelter, love, sleep, and health care, which are essential human conditions.

At the same time, State must help them to lead a stable life mentally, physically, domestically, and socially.

Their home, as well as at the social or national level, must ensure their basic human prerequisites.

At the same time, the state, society, and family become a prostitution relief team for adolescent children, providing school education, life education, vocational training, etc., and nurturing healthy self-esteem.

Mental and physical health care must be taken care of.

Finally, families, society and the state must accept them with love and lead them with love.

It is also absolutely necessary to have an attitude that protects the growing and developing human shoots with warm loving touches.

Family doctors, pediatricians and specialists, clinical psychologists, social welfare, state agencies, and the state should become members of the adolescent child prostitution relief team to take responsibility and protect them.

Then their healthy self-esteem and sound pride will come alive and they will be able to become productive members of the board.

 

 

30. Teenage pregnancy…………………….195

 

Definition and current situation of teenage pregnancy

Teenagers refer to children and young adults belonging to the age group between the ages of 13 and 19 yearss-old. The pregnancy of teenage children can be called teenage pregnancy.

In 1982, 1 million teenage girls aged 15-19 years-old in the United States were pregnant.

Of those, 500,000 gave birth, and the remaining 500,000 were either spontaneous, artificial, or aborted.

It is reported that 750,000 adolescent girls aged 15-19 years-old have unwanted pregnancies each year (Source; recent Aesthetics Association).

When teenage girls actively engage in sexual intercourse without contraception, 90% of them are pregnant per year (according to Pediatric News, July 2007).

By the time they graduated from high school, 74% of US teens aged 15-19 years-old had sex at least once or twice a week, and 36% of them continued to have sex while in high school.

Also, according to recent statistics, the pregnancy rate of teenage children in the US is decreasing little by little every year. So, the pregnancy rate of teenage children decreased by 20% compared to 10 years ago. According to a 2010 study, the U.S. teen pregnancy rate is on the rise again.

Teenage pregnancies and fertility rates posed a number of serious problems not only for teenage children themselves, but also for their parents, families, society, and the country, and have become a serious social cancer that cannot be corrected.

Unfortunately, this phenomenon is similar not only in the United States but also in countries around the world.

The teenagers themselves, their parents, the nation and society are all shouting that they should give them a minimum of unwanted teenage pregnancy.

To achieve this goal, we look at the reasons and motives for why so many teenagers become pregnant.

 Photo 3-237. Teenage pregnancy can negatively affect not only the person, but also the teenage girl, the sex partner of the teenage pregnant girl, their family, their society, and the country. Source-Psychiatry Education’s Run, Destroying Lives P.19

Recently, a study on teenage pregnancy in the Obstetrics and Gynecology of Inje Medical University in Korea

·         The average age group of the teenage pregnancy rate was 19 years old, accounting for 52.8% of the total.

·         The menarche age of teenage girls with teenage pregnancy was 13-18 years old and the average menarche age was 15.0 years. The average menarche age of the control group was 14.7 years.

·         In the past pregnancy history, the most common birth was 35 (66%) due to the first pregnancy.

·         Of the 16 teenage girls who had one pregnancy experience, three had full childbirth, and one had a cesarean section.

·         There were 2 cases with 3 pregnancy experiences. One case had an initial artificial abortion in all three times.

·         The average gestational weeks were 40 weeks 2 days, and 40 weeks 4 days of the control group.

·         Delivery of preterm infants under 37 weeks was high in the teenage pregnant group.

Reasons and motivations for a teenage pregnancy

Figure 3-238. Source-Nat Vital Stats Reports. 2003;51:1-20

Popular media such as newspapers, magazines, movies, TV, the Internet, and the iPhone are just dealing with sex topics indiscriminately without limitation. Therefore, it is the current situation that anyone, regardless of age, can easily access information about sex.

Through the Internet, not only adults but also teens are simply exposed to sex information on the sex Internet, such as Sex.com, without limitation, or it can lead to a method of finding a sex partner through various chat methods.

It is no exaggeration to say that today’s teens are completely exposed to various sexual problems.

Today, many adults view sex as if it were indiscriminately open. Also, as some new science has developed, the term “sex culture” confuses teenage children who are growing and developing.

There is no “culture” in sex.

The last name is privacy.

The “sex culture” that adults claim to be infiltrating into teenage children’s minds,  and body without knowing it.

For this reason, teens sometimes become sexually aroused without their knowledge, and they are not even aware of their inappropriate sexual behavior.

 Recently, in this society, we do not know what is right and what is wrong in the right ethical and moral standards. Many teenagers are confused as to whether or not ethical morals are needed in their lives. It is also ambiguous about the correct values ​​of sex. In particular, most teens seem to be confused about premarital sex or pregnancy ideas.

Some of the teenage children misunderstand that sex is open, take no responsibility for sex, and have uncontrolled sex.

Rarely, this is happening in some adults as well.

Nowaday teenagers are learning and imitating the methods of sex problems experienced by leaders and other older generations such as world-renowned politicians such as US senators, US presidents, and state governors.

However the most people say that it is best to solve premarital sexual desire with abstinence, but in fact, it is not easy to solve sexual desire only with abstinence.

In particular, in most advanced countries in the modern era, the basic essential conditions of human beings, such as shelters, food,  clothings and health, have been resolved, and teenage children exposed to a rich daily lifestyle, maintaining optimal health, and they are exposed to modern “sex culture”and then they are involvde having sex with love. There are many teenagers who don’t think it’s strange and that it is the right life.

Moreover, it is easy to obtain, easy to use and can be contracepted with various contraceptive methods and contraceptives that have excellent contraceptive effects, and after thinking that you will not be pregnant, teenagers will have unrestrained sex if they decide to do so. Accordingly, the teenage pregnancy rate continues to increase.

As children entering puberty grow and develop rapidly, the physique of teenage children becomes similar to or stronger than that of adults in just a few years.

However, there are still many similarities to those of young children in their mental and emotional aspects.

They are physically as big as adults, but in fact ,they are still children.

Since teenage children’s self-determination is still as inexperienced as children, they often do not have responsibility for their sexual relations.

So sometimes they don’t even think about the fact that problems with childbirth and children having babies can arise for them.

The average age of menarche of US adolescent girls is 12.8 to 13.2 years old.

Some girls begin puberty at the early age of 8 years old and menarche at the age of 10 years old.

The menarche of most adolescent girls is at least 10 to 16 years old.

Puberty comes early and some of the physically precocious teenage children begin their sexual life early in puberty.

They still are mentally children and physically children.

Most of their sexual knowledge is inadequate and improper, and they don’t know what sexual values ​​and their gender notions are immature.

They don’t know how to use perfect contraception.

Moreover, most of them grow up without being able to receive unconditional true love from their parents.

For one reason or another, teenage children inadvertently become pregnant.

Teens who have been incest or sexually abused,

Teenage children who grew up without real unconditional love from their parents and without proper discipline, guidance, or control,

Teenage children of parents with ambiguous ideas about premarital sex,

Teens who start dating at a young age,

Teenage children who are not good at studying or hard at school,

Teenage children with a vague hope in the future,

Teenage children who grow up without adequate financial and emotional support from parents or family members,

Anxious and depressed teens are more prone to premarital sex and consequently lead to teenage pregnancy.

Even teens who don’t, sometimes have sex as an experience.

In general, teenage children who study hard in school and live a strong religious life have much less premarital sex and less teenage pregnancy.

Problems and complications of pregnancy in teenage children

When teenage girls become pregnant, they are more prone to pregnancy complications, such as toxemia , gestational hypertension, and anemia and more.

Also, because they are not fully grown physically and mentally, they have more cesarean section instead of natural delivery.

Premature babies, low-birth weight babies, and deformed babies are more likely to be delivered.

Newborns and infants born to teenage girls are more susceptible to various diseases, resulting in higher mortality rates for newborns and infants, and even when their children are older, they may suffer from cognitive and behavioral disorders, psycho-emotional problems, poor school learning, and social problems.

During pregnancy, teenage girls are more dissatisfied with school, home, and society, and are more likely to drop out of school without properly transferring school courses due to poor grades and financial problems.

In addition, there are many times when parents of teens cannot properly raise children born of an unplanned pregnancy. So, most of the teenage parents are more inclined to emotionally and economically dependent on society and the state to raise their children, leaving them for life.

Some of the teenagers tend to not properly plan family planning and contraception after delivery, so they can get pregnant again soon. They get pregnant frequently, making their lives uncomfortable in many ways, and they tend to live unhealthily.

In addition, the most teenage fathers who have a child born after having sex with teenage girls are not able to fulfill their father’s role in economic, educational, emotional, and other aspects.

Some of the teenage fathers are often associated with alcoholism, drug addiction, depression, and criminal activity.

So they can’t maintain a comfortable, stable, and smooth home

Problems can also arise at work, and more often, the most of the teenage fathers run into financial problems.

However, some of the teenage parents do not depend entirely on their own  parents, society, or the state, but marry, have a good marital relationship, have a comfortable family, and raise their children well.

According to US statistics, 57% of teen pregnancies have an artificial abortion, 29% deliver full-term pregnancy, and 14% have a spontaneous abortion. (Source-Pediatric News, July 2007).

If teenage girls are diagnosed as pregnant, do not hesitate to help ensure regular pregnancy health checkups during pregnancy, do not take any type of drugs without a doctor’s prescription, do not consume alcohol, do not smoke, and to make sure to be in safe and healthy for pregnant women or for a growing baby. To make  sure your pregnancyto be full term and deliver a healthy full-term baby.

Most of the teenage children whose pregnancy ends as a result of a natural or artificial abortion which causes suffer mentally and physically for her whole life.

Most of the teenage children who did not have children due to deliberately planned family plan such as contraception and then they deliverd children whoh continue to live with more problems in terms of education and economy throughout their lives.

Also, unfortunately, teenagers who are unable to raise their children have problems with raising their own children, adopting them as adopted children, or having to be raised by someone in their family.

It is a general study finding that teaching teens to stop having sex and to abstain from sexual intercourse has little effect.

It is much more appropriate to prevent pregnancy by contraception than to have sex education not to become pregnant because of abstinence.

Why teenagers are actively engaged in sexual intercourse should be investigated through an expert.

It is necessary to provide formal pediatric sex education appropriate for the age and ability of children at home, school, or church.

Sometimes it’s good to ask your regular pediatrician about this sex education.

Abstinence, responsible sex, premarital sex and its consequences, birth control, and sexually transmitted diseases prevention methods, etc., should be proactively provided to teenage children to prevent unwanted and unplanned teenage pregnancy.

It is said that the rate of teenage pregnancy does not significantly decrease, even if the teenage children are well trained in regular childhood sex education.

There are many ways to keep your teen from getting pregnant. However, there is no single way for parents to take responsibility and to keep their teenage children from becoming pregnant.

Nevertheless, the best way to minimize teenage pregnancy is for parents to truly love their teens unconditionally, train them well with love, have parents and teens communicate smoothly, and treat teens with trust.

30. Masturbation …………………214

The external genital organ rubbed by own hands or other or rubbed against to other objects to have good feeling is called masturbation. They can feel pleasure when they touch their exogenous genital organs with their hands.

It is wrong for parents, children, or any other person to talk about personal privacy topics such as external genital organs, masturbation, sex, sexual intercourse at any time, or anywhere.

In the past, now, in Korea, in the United States, or in any other country, it is wrong to talk about personal privacy topics at anytime or anywhere.

Surprisingly, sexual problems, masturbation problems, and sex problems are common in the child-rearing process, but there are not so many parents who want to seek counseling at the pediatric clinics on such sexual privacy topics.

Today, at home and at school, children learn a lot of information about sex through regular home pediatric sex education (children sex education), school regular pediatric sex education, and sex education reference books.

Various newspapers, magazines, media broadcasts, television movies, and the internet are used to indiscriminately listen to and learn a lot of information about sex, such as masturbation by children themselves.

Most school-age children and adolescents have listen to and learn about sex a lot from their peers and friends. Sexual information obtained in that way is sometimes misleading and exaggerated.

Infants and toddlers accidentally find that there is a difference in the feeling that occurs when the external genital organ is accidentally touched or when the external genital organ is touched by their body parts. After that, they may develop a habit of stimulating their external genital organs.

Most parents who first discover the male or female infants and school-age children to masturbate are embarrassed and worried about how to cope.

There is literature saying that one week old newborns  also masturbate, and there is literature that one-month-old female infants also masturbate.

It’s normal for male infants to have their penis erected upright just before they urinate, and that’s normal. It is normal for male infants to get excited and erection when they touch the penis with their hands.

In addition, it is common for a male and female child to have a pleasant feeling when the external genital organs accidentally touched.

For this reason, 6-7 months old infants may touch and play with their external genital organs with their hands, and a 2-year-old infant may feel good when he touches his or her external genital organs. For reference, not all of these acts are masturbation.

Sometimes parents, grandparents, or babysitters who watch the babies sometimes notice that the babies feel pleasure ande laughing if they properly touch their external genital organs when they put their dress on or give bathe an infant. This is also normal.

Some infants and toddlers have a good feeling in the external genital organ when parents accidentally touch their external genitalia, and after that, the children touch their external genital organ by themselves and then masturbate.

Some of the school-age and adolescent children consciously masturbate by stimulating their external s genital organs with their crotch or hands.

Some of them masturbate their external genitalia by rubbing against the saddle or rubbing agaist the bed or riding a tricycle. Some children masturbate their external genitalia by rubbing against a family member or other person while wearing clothing.

Masturbation that most children do is normal in the process of growth and development.

However, it is unusual to masturbate excessively or to masturbate by stimulating own external genital organs at any time or any place.

Infants and toddlers are curious about every aspect, especially an external genital organ.

They try to make it fun to see other children’s and adults’ personal privacy, such as the external genital organ. This is also normal.

Infants and toddlers also masturbate normally.

Both school-age children and adolescent children masturbate normally, and girls and boys also masturbate normally.

However, there are not so many good research results on masturbation, so there are not enough references for parents to refer to.

In most cases, infant masturbation behavior is normal, so it is not a good idea for parents to abruptly stop infants’ masturbation behavior.

Whether educating them that it is not right to practice masturbation in public or at any time, it is a good idea to distract them and stop masturbation indirectly.

In particular, it is a difficult problem to prevent parents from masturbating at all, since infants and toddlers practice masturbation at any time in various ways.

When giving pediatric sex education to infants under 5 years of age, they have to educate them to be a part of privacy, and they can properly touch their external  genital organs with their own hands only in the bed or the bathroom to toilet, but not in front of parents, siblings, especially others, or in public places. Parents must educate them that they should not touch their external organs at any time in frontof  anybodies.

If parents see infants and toddlers masturbate in front of their parents, if they do not ignore the behavior or ignore the behavior, they think that parents may allow them doing so.

However, depending on the children’s age, parents can distract them and have them stop masturbation, dress appropriately, hug, or indirectly stop masturbation through conversation.

You can stop masturbating by sending from where your child was and having them play there.

Itchy and scratching due to diaper dermatitis at the external genital organs or inflammation of the external genital organ may be mistaken for masturbating. In this case, it is better to consult their doctor.

When the children masturbate, do not punish, spank, corporal punishment, intimidate, or insult.

With proper sex education, until they reach the age of entering kindergarten, you will find that masturbation is a very private issue and one of the personal actions they should take.

Just as infants and toddlers can feel pleasure when they suck their fingers, they can feel pleasure when they touch their external genital organs with their hands. Masturbation is neither abnormal sex nor precocious sex.

Rarely, masturbation can cause skin redness of external genital organ and microscopic hematuria mabe develped for a short time.

In puberty, it is common to actively masturbate as muchas 25 to 40% of adolescent girls masturbate, and 45 to 90% of adolescent boys.

Most adolescent children actively masturbate frequently to relieve their sexual desires from sexual impulses.

Some children sometimes misunderstand worry that parents or adults regard it as a bad thing to masturbate and that they prevent masturbation at all.

When Sometimes grandparents or parents touch properlywithout thinking their children’s external genital organ genital organs an at that time children feel good.

After that, the child can sometimes masturbate himself.

For reference, improperly touching the external genital organ genital organ of a child who is other than my child, It  may be considered child abuse.

In particular, adolescent children can relieve their sexual impulses through masturbation and relieve tension arising from sexual impulses.

Masturbation is normal when the child is alone, just before going to bed, or in other cases when sexual impulses arise.

Regardless of age, it can be unusual when children masturbate in a public place, masturbate too often, repeat frequently, or masturbate impulsively.

In this case, in the pediatric clinics, doctors try to find whether there is any disease, mental or emotional abnormality, whether the mother and father’s marriage is smooth, and sometimes doctor may undergo a psychological evaluation, and give appropriate treatment. However, I have not yet seen a child who masturbates enough to require such treatment.

Sometimes the external genitalia organ such as the vulva can be itchy because too much masturbation or  to have urinary tract system abnormality, or constipated.

For this reason, infants and toddlers should not be regarded as blindly masturbating if they frequently touch or scratch the external genital organ genital organ.

When one or two-year-old infants do not know that it is inappropriate to masturbate in front of another person, parents may ignore the behavior or move them to another place and have them play there to indirectly prevent masturbation.

As parents spend a lot of time with their young infants and toddlers, they give a lot of love for eye contact, physical contact, and a lot of focused attention.

Solving problems at home and making the marital life smooth can reduce the frequency of masturbation among infants and young children.

They usually have fun with their peers and friends and do a lot of age-appropriate physical comtact exercise.

It is said that children who grow up in families with a lot of family conflict can masturbate more than usual, and some children masturbate as a means to anger ventilation toward their parents, and as a means of expressing anger.

Children who are anxious and worried are more likely to masturbate.

Even when you have severe emotional or neuropsychiatric problems, children can masturbate abnormally.

If you believe that children are doing more masturbation than usual, or if you want to obtain more information, you may need to be evaluated for growth and development at the pediatric clinics, undergo a checkup, and be treated with the help of pediatricians, psychiatrist, clinical psychologist, or neurologist as needed.

However, I have never seen a child or adolescent who needs such treatment for abnormal masturbation.

The following is an example of a question-and-answer on health counseling for children and adolescents on the Internet about “masturbation of 4 years old and opposition parties”.

Q&A. Masturbation of 4 years old

Q. Hello?

My child is a 4-year-old girl.

A few months ago, there are dolls that are as big as his body size is, and he lays it down and rubs his genitals against the doll which he puts between his legs.

At first, I was told not to be too surprised, but the groom just told me to leave it naturally, so I pretended not to know, but I don’t think I should just let it go.

Sometimes the cheeks turn red.

Yesterday I hid the doll. Please give me an answer on how to deal with it.

A. parents

Hello. Thanks for asking a good question.

The more detailed information I have, such as your child’s age, gender, past medical history, family medical history, medical examination findings, and clinical examination, the better I can give you, but I will respond based on the information you provided.

It seems to be masturbating.

As you may know, infants, toddlers, and school-age children can masturbate.

It is normal to masturbate.

Some children masturbate in public places or in front of their parents. Some young children may not know that masturbating in front of others is shameful and inappropriate. In the future, children will masturbate that way and naturally will not do it anymore when the time comes. When he masturbates that way until he quits on his own, you can either pretend to be ignored or move her where your children will not see.

However, it is not appropriate to forcibly take her away or hide his dolls, etc., which the child liked to play with by masturbating.

It is also inappropriate to tell the child that playing like that is bad or to say that it is bad to masturbate and forcibly stop playing like that.

Because they don’t think it’s bad for them to behave that way.

If you spend a lot of time playing with your child, truly loving and unconditionally, playing in that way can be reduced or no longer.

If he continue severely and you are worried, please consult with the pediatric psychiatrist for a medical examination and the problem.

If you have more questions, please contact me again. Thank you.

Lee Sang-won, MD

 

 

31.Depression in children and adolescents (1)….. …………….. 207

 

Overview and statistics of depression in children and adolescents

The  young human being below the age of puberty are children.

The period from birth to puberty is called childhood.

That is, children before puberty are called children for convenience.

Children and adolescents referred to children within the age range of 0-18.

Depression is one of the most serious mental disorders that can occur to anyone in all walks of life, the poor or rich, the young or the old.

If anyone had suffered from severe depression in childhood, the depression may recur within five years thereafter. Bipolar disorder has increased 40-fold since 1994 in pre-adolescent and adolescent children (source- Dr. Mark Olson, The Journal of archives of general psychiatry 2007).

One in 10 children and adolescents (ages 0-18) can develop depression.

It is reported that 4 to 18% of adolescent children develop depression.

30% of adolescent children with severe psychosis are receiving treatment.

It is reported that 50% of adults with severe psychosis start at age 14-years-old (source; Journal watch pediatrics and adolescent medicine, August 2008. p 769).

The main symptoms of depression can lead to impaired feelings and behaviors, and an overall weird health condition.

Most depressed adolescents are treated appropriately soon, but some depressed adolescents don’t even know they are depressed, and sometimes parents don’t know if their children are depressed. Because of this, some of the adolescent children suffering from depression do not receive appropriate treatment for depression.

In addition, there are many cases where treatment for depression is not recommended even though it is recommended.

Depression in adolescent children is a major cause of suicide.

Suicide is the third leading cause of death among adolescent children and young adults aged 15-24 years-old.

 Suicide is the third cause of death among 15-years-old adolescent children.

⅔ of adolescent children with depression are not receiving treatment from a psychiatrist for various reasons.

Drinking alcohol, alcoholism, and addictive drug abuse can result from depression. Conversely, alcoholism or substance abuse can lead to depression.

If the depression of adolescent children is not properly treated, symptoms become more and more severe without knowing, and they penetrate deeply into their daily life, and eventually, they may not be able to perform their daily life normally and their entire life may be ruined.

Diagnosis of symptoms of depression in children and adolescents

If the anybody with following  symptoms and/ or coditions he orshe most likely has depression.

If there are at least 5 or 5 more symptoms signs which are describe as 1 to 11 below, and / or such symptoms persist for at least more than two weeks

 and /or such symptom and signs are severe, and /or  if they cannot perform their daily activities normally

1.

·         Thinking about death.

·         Thinking of wanting to die.

·          He said “I think I’m dying”,

·         Thinking about how to die from suicide,

·         Sometimes they commit suicide.

·         If the children experience symptoms of depression with thinking about dying like this, parents should seek immediate consultation with their doctor or take them to the hospital emergency room for psychiatric treatment.

2.

·         He feels sad

·         He said  “there is no hope”

·         Symptoms of crying for no reason may persist.

3.

·         Lack of pride

·         Guilty feeling for no reason

·         He or she feel that ‘I am no longer a good human being’.

4.

·         It means nothing to live

·         ‘I don’t think there will be anything better in the future’.

5.

·         There is no feeling

6.

·         He said “I lost interest in studying, social activities, physical activities, extracurricular activities, etc”.

·         He said “I don’t hang out with my close friends anymore”

·         He said “I spend time alone almost”.

7.

·         He said “It’s difficult to decide what to do”.

·         He said  “I can’t start or do anything new”

·         He said “my memory is definitely lost and I can’t concentrate well”.

8.

·         He said “my nerves become sensitive”.

·         He said “I get mad at the little things”.

·         Excessive reaction.

9.

·         He said “I can sleep too much or less than normal”.

·         He said “I can eat more or less food than usual”.

·         He said “My weight is abnormally increased or decreased”.

10.

·         He said “I am always tired for no specific reason”.

11.

·         Some of the depressed adolescent children may have problems such as substance abuse, alcoholism, indiscriminate heterosexuality, school problems, poor grades, etc. and may have problems with family or friends, he can be rebellious and destructive to authorities or parents.

If you suspect that a child or adolescent has depression

① Tell your family or friends that “I think I ams depressed “and Get consult with an expert or doctor who can treat depression.

② Otherwise, you will receive diagnostic treatment from the pediatric clinic soon.

③ Get help from school counselors, nurses, and social workers.

④ Get help from a psychiatrist.

⑤ Seek help from a priest, a pastor, or a rabbi who is qualified to provide counseling.

⑥ It is important to seek medical help and treatment before the symptoms become more severe.

⑦ Weak mind and body, lack of healthy self-esteem, problems with studying at school or doing extracurricular activities, and not trying to do something well or not doing anything  all above can be symptoms of depression.

⑧ Most adolescent children with depression are well treated with counseling, counseling, or anti-depressant drugs.

⑨ Depression is a relatively common disease and can occur to anyone, young or old. If your children feel depressed, they should seek medical attention and treatment soon.

 A blood test may indicate early-onset depression in teens. In the Los Angeles Times (4/18/2012), Healy reports

Treatment of depression in children and adolescents

Drugs used to treat depression

·         Fluoxetine,

·         Paroxetine,

·         Sertraline,

·         Fluvoxamine,

·         Citalopram,

·         Escitalopram,

·         Amitriptyline,

·         There are several types, including imipramine.

One or more of them can be used to treat one or two of several antidepressants.

However, according to a February 2008 study by Irv Kirsch of the University of Hull, most of the drugs used to treat depression are effective in treating severe depression, but not in treating mild depression.

Major Depressive Disorder is also treated with escitalopram oxalate (LEXAPRO).

Figure 3-249. The rate of using antidepressants is higher among adolescent girls than among adolescent boys. (The number above is the number of children treated with antidepressant drugs out of 1,000 adolescent children aged 10-19 years old)

Source-Medico Health Solutions Inc. and Elsevier Medical News, 2007

 

32.Depression of adolescent children (2)………………….              226

 

Overview of depression of adolescent children 

For reference, some of the following content is the same as that of depression of chidren and adolescent(1).

Depression is one of the most serious mental illnesses that can occur to anyone from all walks of life, regardless of gender, young and old.

Depression can recur within 5 years after one severe depression in childhood.

Bipolar disorder in pre-adolescent infants, school-age children, and adolescent children has increased 40 fold since 1994 (source; Dr. Mark Olson, The Journal of archives of general psychiatry 2007).

One in ten children and adolescents can develop depression.

4 to 18% of adolescent children develop depression.

Only 30% of adolescent children with severe psychosis are receiving adequate treatment.

It is reported that 50% of adults with serious psychosis began to develop psychosis at age 14-years-old (source; Journal watch pediatrics and adolescent medicine, August 2008. p.769).

The main symptoms of depression are feeling disorders, behavioral disorders, and overall deterioration of mental health.

Most children with depression get appropriate treatment soon, but some do not know they are depressed. Also, their parents are not sure if their children have depression. As a result, children with depression are not receiving adequate treatment for depression.

It is common for people not to receive adequate treatment even though they are encouraged to receive adequate treatment.

Depression in adolescent children is a major cause of suicide.

Suicide is the third cause of death in adolescents and young people aged 15 to 24- years old.

Suicide is the third leading cause of death among 15-year-old adolescent children.

⅔ of children with depression do not seek treatment by a psychiatrist for a number of reasons.

Alcoholism and addictive substance abuse can be caused by depression, but vice versa. Alcoholism or substance abuse can lead to depression.

If the depression of adolescent children is not properly treated, symptoms of depression become more and more serious without knowing, and it penetrates deeply into all areas of daily life, eventually preventing them from performing their normal daily activities, and life can be ruined.

The causes, triggers, types, and incidence of depression in adolescent children

The cause of depression is unclear.

Depression is one of the most serious mental illnesses.

Depression is caused by a combination of heredity, physiology, social, and mental factors, and life-long stress.

Depression can occur in adults, children, and adolescents, regardless of age, and can occur in both men and women of all ages.

Especially today, adolescent children are more prone to depression.

Although the cause of depression is not known for certain, it is believed that depression occurs when abnormalities in the brain metabolism of two brain biochemicals, norepinephrine, and serotonin, occur.

Factors of depression in adolescent children

Adolescent girls are more susceptible to depression for a number of reasons, and the symptoms can take many forms.

Depression can be triggered by the death or separation of a parent, divorce, death of a family member, living in solitude far away from home, separation from a partner, and other reasons. In other words, depression is triggered by multiple factors.

Until a few decades ago, it was believed that children do not develop depression. However, depression is relatively more common in adolescent children and young people today.

Depression can also be triggered in newborns, infants, and school-age children before puberty.

Types of depression in adolescent children

With acute depression

Sometimes classified as a chronic type of depression,

Mild depression,

Moderate depression

It is also classified as severe depression.

Depression can progress and recur. This type of depression is called recurrent depression.

Depression in adolescent children,

It can be classified as adult depression.

Adolescent children can develop smiling depression.

 Incidence of depression in adolescent children

According to the U.S. NCS statistics on the incidence of depression in 8,000 Americans aged 15-54 years-old,

In 14% of young people who experienced severe depression, depression started before puberty,

Eleven percent of young people who have experienced mild depression say that depression started before puberty ends.

Depression was found in 18% of 9,800 male and female students in grades 6, 8, 9, and 10 in the U.S.

It is reported that 25% of female students and 10% of male students had depression. Source: US NICHHDD, Depression or Bipolar Disorder, Dwight L. Evans, MD and etc.

 Symptoms of depression in adolescent children 

Figure 2-23. Very Depressed Teen Girl

Copyright ⓒ 2015 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

• The main symptoms of depression are feeling disorders and behavioral disorders, resulting in abnormalities in general health.
• Symptoms of depression vary depending on age, sex, the severity of depression, and factors that cause depression.
• When depression occurs in infants and toddlers, hyperactivity disorder can occur, and infants and toddlers who have had toilet training and may not have toilet training and become regressive behavior.
• When adolescents become depressed, they can act rebelliously against their parents, siblings, family members, or authorities.
• Especially when adolescent girls suffer from depression, their concept of body image is not good, become disappointed about everything themself,
• They think their life has reached the point of failure,
• Adolescents, who loved to study before becoming depressed, lost interest in the social life, physical and social activities that they had enjoyed without studying hard anymore. They no longer hang out with their close friends and spend time alone.
• They may  have attention deficit disorder and They can’t concentrate well,
• Interpersonal problems can also arise.
• Eating more than usual or limiting food intake above normal
• They may be more interested in their weight.
• When parents become depressed, their children are more prone to depression.
• Depression can be triggered by habitual substance abuse, alcohol use, alcoholism or substance abuse.
• They  may have reckless, promiscuous, and complex sex,
• Makes it easier to get stressed
• Can commit violent behavior
• Runaway, indiscreet sex, teenage pregnancy, and other problems can occur.
• Conversation between parents and children can also cause problems,
• School study problems can also arise.
• Depending on the menstrual cycle, depressive symptoms may get worse or worse.
• Regardless of gender, helplessness, despair, desperation, self-deprecation, low concentration and concentration deficit, daydreaming, boredom, fatigue, sluggishness, physical depression, degenerative behavior, depressive dissemination, substance abuse, teenage pregnancy, criminal behavior, suicide, etc.
• And more symptoms of depression can occur other than above.
• When adolescent children who have studied well become depressed, they often tarry, leave early, and absent from school for no reason, and grades begin to decline.
• They complain excessively about everything, don’t feel well, and can be aggressive in everything.
• They may not fall asleep well or may wake up frequently during sleep.
• You can dream a lot or sleep too much.
• They spend a lot of time alone and hate making friends.
• In the meantime, They gradually lose interest in the work, They worked hard every day, and They try not to start anything at all.
• Losing the taste of rice and not eating well, or vice versa can lead to obesity by eating too much.
• Complaining that the head hurts often or that stomach hurts and often can cause constipation.
• When a parent or teacher asks anything, it can be upset or annoying.
• They often cause hard-to-understand safety accidents, get angry with trivial things, and break things.
• They can invade houses or destroy objects.
• Sometimes they say they want to die, and sometimes they actually commit suicide.
• Depression in adolescent children can be a major cause of suicide.
• Adolescent children with depression sometimes drink too much and become addicted to drugs or habit-forming drugs.
• Parents and most teachers who are unaware that their adolescent children are doing that type of behavior due to depression can be treated as bad behavior because they are bad children.
• This can lead to a number of problems between parents and children with depression and between teachers and students with depression.
• Most adolescent children with depression will receive treatment for depression soon, but some do not know they are depressed, and of course, even adolescent children who are diagnosed with depression and are encouraged to seek treatment for depression do not receive treatment for depression.
• Depression is the leading cause of suicide and is the third leading cause of death among adolescents and young people aged 15 to 24. And it has already been mentioned as the third leading cause of suicide in 15-year-old adolescent children.
• If a child or adolescent suffers from severe depression, the depression is likely to recur within 5 years thereafter.
• If depression is not properly treated, symptoms of depression become more and more severe without knowing, and they penetrate deeply into your daily life, eventually preventing you from living a normal life.

Diagnosis of depression in adolescent children

• Depression is diagnosed by medical history, symptoms, and examination findings.
• School grades gradually decline,
• Daydreaming at home or at school,
• Lose interest in everything,
• Like to be alone,
• Headache, abdominal pain, loss of appetite, sleep disturbance, destruction of objects, suicidal attempts and suicide, alcohol and behavioral disorders such as criminal behavior, emotional disorders, and thought disorders are very helpful in diagnosing depression.
• Depression and other diseases are differentially diagnosed with blood, urine, brain waves(EEG), and thyroid function tests.

 Diagnosis of depression in pre-adolescent or adolescent children

• Among the symptoms of depression in the following items ①~⑪, at least 5 or more symptoms are present at the same time or Such symptoms persist for at least 2 weeks and more.

Treatment of depression in adolescent children

• Treatment varies depending on the cause, severity, and symptoms of depression.
• Even if depression is induced in adolescent children for various reasons and triggers, depression may not be diagnosed correctly early.
• Also, he may not be able to get the right expert help on time.
• So, it is said that only 1/4 to 1/3 of adolescent children suffering from depression receive adequate treatment.
• We must do our best to mentally stabilize depressed adolescent children and eliminate causes and triggers.
• Parents should work with their doctor to consult with their depressed adolescent children to find out what triggers the depression.
• When a parent’s child-rearing parenting is wrong and adolescent children become depressed, do not hesitate to apologize to the child, correct the wrong parenting method immediately, and if the adolescent child’s thoughts are correct, they must acknowledge the thoughts.
• When a depressed adolescent child prays to commit suicide or says he will commit suicide, the depression should be treated as an emergency according to the doctor’s instructions.
• This is because the majority of adolescent children who have committed suicide at least once in the past or who have said they will commit suicide will one day actually commit suicide (see suicide).
• For this reason, when adolescents with severe depression say they commit suicide or attempt suicide, they should be hospitalized for a while and treated with special attention to prevent suicide.
• In addition, depression is treated with medication, psychotherapy, and counseling.
• Among the various treatment methods for depression, the most important thing is to truly love a depressed adolescent child without condition and give focused attention love and care.
• Both children and their families with depression should seek counseling treatment by a psychiatrist.

If you suspect or diagnose that your adolescent child has depression,

① Tell your family or friends that “I think I am depressed and consult with a depression treatment specialist or a pediatric psychiatrist.

② Otherwise, he will receive diagnostic treatment from your regular pediatrician immediately.

③ Get help from school counselors, nurses, and social workers.

④ Get help from a psychiatrist. If possible, seek help from a pediatric psychiatrist.

⑤ Seek the help of a priest, pastor, or rabbi who is qualified and experienced to provide counseling.

⑥ It is important to seek help and treatment from a pediatric psychiatrist in the early stages of depression before symptoms become more severe.

⑦ Weak mind and body, lack of sound healthy self-esteem, problems with studying at school or doing extracurricular activities, and not trying to do their best to do something well or not doing anything at all can be a symptom of depression.

⑧ Most adolescent children with depression are well treated with counseling, counseling, or anti-depressant drugs.

⑨ Depression is a relatively common psychotic disease and can occur in both men and women of all ages. If you think they are depressed, you should immediately seek help and treatment from a pediatric psychiatrist.

Drugs to treat depression in adolescent children

• Drugs used to treat depression include Fluoxetine, Paroxetine, Sertraline, Fluvoxamine, Citalopram, Escitalopram, Antitriptylin, and Imipramine.
• You can choose one or more than one antidepressant medication to treat depression.
• However, according to a study by Irv Kirsch of the University of Hull, published in February 2008, most of the drugs used to treat depression are effective in treating severe depression, but not very effective in treating mild depression. 26, 27, others
• Major Depressive Disorder is also treated with Escitalopram oxalate (LEXAPRO).
• The following antidepressants and anxiolytic drugs can be treated according to the doctor’s prescription.
• Figure 2-25. The rate of receiving antidepressant medication is higher in adolescent girls than that of adolescent boys.
• Higher for adolescent girls (the number above is the number of children treated with antidepressant drugs out of 1,000 adolescent children 10-19 years old).

Antidepressants and Anxiolytics (Anxiolytics) (I)

Antidepressants and anxiety-relieving drugs (anxiety-relieving drugs),  Common name	Brand name	Initial dose (12 years old or younger)	The maintenance dose (12 years old or younger)	Initial dose (12 years old or older)	The maintenance dose (12 years old or older) More)	Side effects and notes
Fluoxetine	Prozac	5-10 mg/1 day	10-30 mg/1 day	10 mg/ 1 day	20-40 mg/1 day, up to 60 mg/1 day, maximum 20-40 mg/1 day	It is the most effective antidepressant drug for childhood depression. If you have been treated with MAOI before 14 days, you cannot use this medicine, Side effects to the central nervous system, headache, nervousness, sedation, gastrointestinal disorders
Fluvoxamine	Luvox	25 mg Once every evening before bedtime 25 mg	100-200 mg/1 day	25-50 mg/1 day before bedtime 25-50 mg/	150-300 mg/1 day before bedtime	–
Paroxetine	Paxil	5-10 mg/1 day 10-20 mg/1 day	10-20 mg/1 day	10-20 mg/1 day	20-40 mg/1 day	Purpura, low sodium, may interact with many different types of drugs
Sertraline	Zoloft	25 mg/1 day	100-150 mg/ 1 day	25-50 mg/1day	150-200 mg/1 day	Purpura, low sodium, interactions with many different drugs
Citalopram	Celexal	–	10-20 mg/ a day	–	10-40 mg/1 day	Fluoxetine, which may interact with different types of drugs.
Venlafaxine	Effexor	37.5 mg/1 day	75-150 mg/1 day	37.5 -75 mg/1 day	150-300 mg/1 day	Side effects such as nausea, vomiting, dizziness, drowsiness, constipation, Serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor
Nefazodone	Serzone	–	Depend upon the treatment effect is seen the dose may increase by 50 mg every 3 days. In children 12 years old and younger, the maximum amount is 300mg/1 day	–	children 12 years and older, the maximum amount is 600 mg/1 day	5-HT blocker. Nausea, vomiting, dizziness, genital erection, dry mouth, visual impairment

Table 59. Antidepressant and anti-anxiety drugs (anxiolytics) Anxiolytics (II)

Antidepressants and anxiety-relieving drugs (anxiety-relieving drugs), Common name	Antidepressant and Anxiety Relief (Anxiety Relief), Brand Name	–	–	Dosage (18 years old or older)	–	Side Effects and Notes
Bupropion sustained-release drug	Wellbutrin SR	–	–	100 mg twice a day for 3 days treatment, if no side effect, 100 mg 3 times a day (every 6 hours in small doses), max. One dose is 150 mg	–	If side effects such as central nervous system irritation, weight change, dry mouth, headache, gastrointestinal disorders, insomnia, convulsions, or visual impairment develop It cannot be used for treatment with this medicine.
Mirtazapine	Remeron	–	–	Begin treatment with 15 mg daily before bedtime and gradually increase every 1-2 weeks	–	Before beginning to use this medicine, CBC test,, liver function tests should be performed and periodically thereafter. Side effects such as increased appetite, weight gain, dizziness, nausea, dry mouth, constipation, excessive sleep, increased or decreased blood pressure
Buspirone	BusPal	–	–	2.5-5mg/1 day, followed by 2.5mg/1 day incremental treatment every 3-4 days, the maximum amount is 20 mg/1 day. 5-10 mg/1 day for adolescent children, Every 3-4 days, 5 mg/1 day, increase treatment. Maximum 1 dose is 60mg/day	–	Tachycardia, headache, insomnia, confusion, dizziness, gastrointestinal problems
Trazodone	–	–	–	Children (1-18 years-old), Take 1.5-2 mg/kg as the total daily amount and take it orally  2 or 3 divide dose. If necessary, take 6 mg/kg every 3-4 days as the total amount per day, 3 divide doses per day, and take 1 dose 3 times. Adults 150 mg/day, 3 divide dose  3 times a day, if necessary, increase the amount of treatment	–	Side effects such as dizziness, irritation, dry mouth, diarrhea, anemia, weakness, and convulsions
Imipramine	Tofranil –	–	–	Children: 1.5 mg/kg is the total daily amount, and the total daily amount is 3 divided doses and taken orally 3 times a day. Depending on the treatment effect, 1-1.5 mg/kg can be increased to the total daily amount every 3-4 days, so the maximum daily dose is 5 mg/kg/24 hours. Adolescent children: Take 25 -50 mg/kg as the total amount per day and take orally a day for 3 divide doses. The maximum daily dose is 200 mg.	–	If having glaucoma and if to treat with this medicine such as MAOI products is contraindicated. Side effects dizziness, irritation, and dry mouth may occur.

33. Stress……………………………………….222

Stress overview

The natural reaction that occurs in the body from real threats, imaginary threats, physical or psychological threats is called stress (Source: Depression or Bipolar Disorder, Dwight L. Evans, MD and etc).

In advance, stress was referred to as “tense” or “pressure.”

It can be tense with worry, frustration, fear, or anger.

This tension is also expressed as stress.

These days, men and women, young and old, the poor and the rich, who haven’t learned any English these days, use the word “stress” to properly express their feelings, even for children aged three years old.

Stress is a global modern language that is used a lot by everyone, regardless of age or gender.

When a developing fetus in the mother’s uterus develops oxygen deficiency, the fetus is stressed and the meconium can be excreted in the womb, which may lead to death sometimes.

Likewise, the fetus is also stressed.

Besides that, pregnant women can be stressed through the five senses of the human body-sight, hearing, taste, touch, sense of smell and also emotion (mind), and the fetus is also stressed.

Stress during some physical exercise can cause bone fractures. These fractures are called stress fractures.

Stress occurs in people of all ages, both men and women, unknowingly over a lifetime, and as a result, existing cells getting age and new cells continue to form.

It is normal for all of us humans to have anger. Also, stress occurs to everyone, and being stressed is normal like anger.

However, too much stress than normal can be very detrimental to your health, and even more severe it can lead to death.

Here’s a look at the stress that occurs in adults and stress in children.

 

Figure 122. Anterior and posterior lobes of pituitary gland and the hypothalamus

c-pons, d-Medulla, e-thalamus

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

The mechanism of stress

This five sensory organs-visual, auditory, smell, taste, touch are in our body.

“Think or mind” does not belong to the sensory organs, but like the sensory organs, it participates in causing stress.

“Information generated through sensations and thoughts enters the brain through five sense organs.

The pentagonal information and thought information arrive at the hypothalamus in the cerebrum.

Then, adrenocorticotropic hormone secretion-promoting hormone factor (CRF) is secreted from the hypothalamus and the factor is transferred to the pituitary gland.

Then, adrenal cortical stimulating hormone (ACTH) is secreted from the pituitary gland.

The adrenal cortical stimulating hormone is transmitted along with the bloodstream to the adrenal cortical endocrine glands, located just above the kidneys. The hormone cortisol is secreted from the adrenal cortical endocrine glands. In addition, epinephrine (adrenaline) and norepinephrine are secreted from the adrenal gland medulla.

The hormones cortisol and epinephrine work together as a defense against stressful situations.

When nerves are stimulated by epinephrine, the functions of organs and tissues of the body’s various systems are promoted.

When the blood concentration of epinephrine increases, the pupil is dilated more and the ability of the eye to see and find is enhanced.

When the concentration of epinephrine in the blood in the heart vessel increases, the heart rate increases, and when the concentration of epinephrine in the blood in the blood vessels of the respiratory system increases, the respiratory rate increases.

Almost the same effect increases the concentration of oxygen in each organ and tissue of each system in the body.

Brain oxygen concentration also is increased, brain function is improved, and judgment is improved.

The blood circulation in the musculoskeletal system is better, the supply of glucose and oxygen in the musculoskeletal cells is improved, and as a result, the musculoskeletal is more energized.

The blood stored in the spleen flows more into the organs and tissues of each system of the body, thereby enhancing the supply of oxygen and nutrition to each tissue.

The skin sweats, blood sugar levels increase in the blood, and their muscle skeleton has more energy.

In this way, When stress occurs, our body responds appropriately to information from the five sensory organs and/or from thoughts.

Without our knowledge, this stress always occurs when we are awake, and when we are sleeping.

For example, suppose that the stressor that came in through your misconceptions or thoughts is “unfamiliar dog”

Suppose that when you suddenly meet a stranger dog you don’t know, hether the dog tries to bite you.

At that time, the moment you decide whether to fight against the dog or run away from it, stress arises.

At that time, stress arises in the body to properly resolve the dog attack. The life-supporting defense resources are necessary to properly resolve a dog attack-epinephrine, cortisol, glucose, immune body, fat, white blood cells, platelets, red blood cells, etc. All organs of the body’s various systems are mobilized in the body’s defense system instantly.

Similarly, the types and amounts of biochemical substances and hormones produced by our body differ depending on the factor that caused the stress.

For example, when stress is caused by a bacterial infection, the number of white blood cells increases, the amount of complement increases, and the function of the immune system is activated.

When stressed by external or internal bleeding, the number of platelets increases and blood clotting factors increase.

When exposed to cold temperatures and stressed, the capillaries in the skin are constricted, the pores of the sweat glands are closed, and heat dissipation from the body to the outside of the body is prevented.

When we are under stress, our body proceeds without knowing the defensive action to relieve stress.

In order to defeat an enemy suddenly encountered, blood circulation is energized, glucose concentration in muscle cells is increased, and the musculature of the limbs is poised to attack and defeat the enemy.

When a country is attacked by another country, it is similar to mobilizing all the combat power of that country, such as land, sea, air force, etc., which is required to fight the enemy and to win, and when stressed, all systems of the entire body are mobilized.

When you are under stress, it is common to decide within ⅛ seconds whether to defeat the stress factor or where to escape from the field, and prepare accordingly.

When faced with a stressor, all of these defenses’ reactions take place at any time and anywhere during our lives, with little or no knowledge.

When you encounter a factor that induces stress, the degree may vary, but large, small, severe, and mild stress will always occur.

So, you are always in a position whether you are fleeing or fighting against a stressful situation.

In this way, stress is a life-sustaining defense response that normally occurs inevitably in our lives.

However, too much stress suddenly can lead to illness and even death.

Unfortunately, while we are alive and breathing, we cannot completely avoid stress.

Emotions and sorrows cannot go away from us while we are alive, and stress always arises from them.

Stress can occur in positive and negative situations in life.

When I win a prize, when I achieve something, when I win a competition, when I get promoted, when I get admission, when I win a lottery, when I get married, when I want a baby to be born, stress arises. The stress that arises from such a positive life is called positive stress. In other words, the stress that occurs when the things we want are done is called positive stress.

The stress that arises when a family member dies, divorces, separates, loses hope, is disappointed, fails, is sick, or loses a job, is called negative stress.

If the level of stress is severe, whether positive or negative, stress can destroy humanity.

These positive stresses cannot be avoided while living negative stresses.

We recommend that we receive the least amount of stress during our lives, whether positive or negative. And you have to work hard to properly handle the stress you’ve received.

Table 2-7 Stress Factors of Married Couples and Stress Scores (Score)

Thomas Homes and Richard Rake of the Washington Medical School in the U.S. study on situations that induce stress in marital life, the corresponding stress score, and health problems according to the total score of the stress score (1950-1960) .

Scores of situations that cause stress in life	score
Death of spouse	100
Divorce	73
Married Parting	65
Imprisonment	63
Death of family relatives	63
When you are sick or injured	53
Marriage	50
When you lose your job	47
Reconciliation in marriage	45
Retirement	45
When your family has health problems	44
Pregnancy	40
When you have trouble making love	39
When a new member of the family is joined	39
When you reorganize your business	39
Changes in economic conditions	38
When a close friend dies	37
When a job you have done so far is changed to another job	36
When marital arguments	35
When the mortgage payment is excessive	31
Bankruptcy due to mortgage or loan	30
When responsibility limits changed at work	29
When a son or daughter leaves home	29
When you have a legal problem	29
Exceptional personal achievement	28
When your spouse starts or leaves your job	26
When school or vacation begins	26
When living environments change	25
When personal habits change	24
When you have a problem with your boss	23
When working hours and conditions at work change	20
When you move to live	20
When schools change	20
When to change the entertainment	19
Changing church activities	19
When to change social activities	18
When the mortgage or loan payment is too much	17
When the number of families living together changes	15
When your sleeping habits change	15
When eating habits change	15

① The normal range of the total stress score is 150 points and less. Couples with a normal range score are less ill and less traumatic.

② 37% of couples with a total stress score in the range of 150 to 190 may have better health problems.

③ 50% of couples with a total stress score in the range of 200 to 299 may be more susceptible to disease or trauma.

④ Disease or trauma may occur to 80% of couples with a total stress score of 300 points.

⑤ Serious health problems can occur in 90% of couples with a total stress score in the range of 350 to 400 points.

Note: There are no studies on pediatric stress scores in this study.

Factors inducing stress in children and adolescents

The inducer of stress in adults and the inducer of stress in children are somewhat different. Stress inducing factors differ depending on the age of children and adolescents.

Here, we consider the stress-inducing factors that occur mainly in teenagers among children and adolescents.

Death of parents, divorce of parents, separation of parents, stress of parents, discord of parents, death of family, economic problems, school study, homework, decline in grades, admission, transfer, peer pressure, future problems, reason problems, friendships, bullying , ridicule and teasing (playing), health, illness, clothing, athletic competition, desire for achievement, body image (self-portrait), too tall or short, too heavy or too fat,  social anxiety, physical abuse, sexual abuse, runaway, children such as pastors or doctors or attorneys or professors, children of impeccable parents, depression, and other problems can trigger stress. 

Effects of stress

The effects on the body, mind, and psychology are different depending on the factors, causes, types, and degrees of stress.

In addition, the effects caused by chronic stress and those caused by acute stress are different.

In most cases, it is not affected by the slightest stress.

However, anxiety discomfort, chronic fatigue syndrome, and insomnia can occur when under any type of stress. If chronic stress persists, it is easier to get old and die at a younger age.

High blood pressure due to stress, diabetes, chest or abdominal pain, headache, heart attack, peptic ulcer, indigestion, inflammatory enteritis, insomnia, bacterial infection, allergic disease, arthritis, cancer, fractures, muscle pain, headache, hyperactivity disorder, dizziness, almost any illness can occur, including habitual drug addiction, infertility, and abortion. Social anxiety and depression can also occur.

How to properly deal with stress

You can’t live without any stress.

The way adults deal with stress is in positively addressing the factors that cause stress.

Dr. Keeth R Ginsburg, in the February 2007 issue of the US Pediatrics News, recommends addressing childhood stress as follows:

Tackle When You Have a Problem

① When you solve a task, you try to solve it all at once if stress arises.

Don’t do it, break the task into small subtasks and solve them one by one.

② Make a list of things to do one by one.

③ If possible, do the assignments before playing. If you play without solving a

the task,  you will be worried and stressed with the task while playing.

④ Avoid meeting or going to people, places, and people who can adversely

affect your planting.

⑤ Rather than complaining about what you cannot change, let it be.

Strive to promote physical health

① Do physical exercise properly.

② Relax and rest. When you get angry and nervous, breathe slowly and deeply.

③ Eat enough balanced foods and always eat breakfast without missing out.

④ Drink plenty of plain water instead of drinking soda water or drinks containing sugar.

⑤ Instead of overeating, let’s get news and instead of eating a lot of fatty foods, eating more fruits and vegetables.

⑥ Get enough sleep and go to bed at the same time.

⑦ Exercise for at least 3o minutes a day.

⑧ Take a warm shower 1 hour before going to bed.

⑨ Do not try to solve any problems in bed before going to bed.

⑩ Do not do homework in bed, do not watch TV, do not read or call.

⑪ Don’t make too many schedules that you can’t afford.

⑫ Take a short break according to your schedule.

⑬ The home is a safe, stable, comfortable refuge and a hall of peace.

Be good at managing your emotions.

① When you have stress, take a vacation to keep your head off

② Think of a place to relax.

③ Take time every day for yourself.

④ Promote hobbies and interests.

⑤ Although it is small, he appreciates the beautiful things around him and has a heart to feel and know about small things or things that can be seen and felt normal.

⑥ Do not suppress your emotions, but express them technically appropriately. Express it in words to others. Sometimes, make an announcement that day in writing. Pray. Smile and sometimes cry and express

Make a better world like others, help others, they will help you too.

① Help your family

② Eat with your family

③ Get emotional support from other family members and friends and get help in solving social problems.

④ We provide nourishment to have sound healthy self-esteem and pride.

⑤ Do work to help society

⑥ Participate in helping the natural environment.

How to relieve tension and stress

• Apologize if you didn’t do it well.
• Ask for help when needed.
• Write down a list of to-dos and erase the list of achievements.
• Make a plan for what to do in the future.
• Do one thing at a time.
• Sleep well at night
• Wake up at least 15 minutes early.
• To hear the birds crying in the morning.
• Learn to say “no”.
• Talk to a friend.
• Spend the evening without TV.
• Go for a walk.
• Whatever you do, you can rest and stretch.
• Drink beverages.
• When you laugh a lot, hormones that reduce and release stress are secreted, immune functions are strengthened, all diseases are prevented, and you become are younger.
• This is an article that reconfirms the word ‘ a smile makes you younger일소일소’.

 

 

34. We are urgently seeking these girls……231

 

 

 

Walking like a baby lamb, diligent like a bee

Girls who love their parents and siblings.

Simple like a daisy, a flower and pretty like a rose

Sincere and honest girls.

Shining like a diamond, pure like a pearl

Girls you can trust.

Happy like a robin, gentle like a dove,

Whoever likes girls.

My sunshine.

My valentine.

We are urgently seeking these girls.

 

By Buckwheat Poulson

 

 

35. We are urgently seeking these boys. …..231

 

Photo 116. A young man who grew up with  his mother’s unconditional real love

 

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Urgently seeking a boy.

A boy who stands upright, with his chest widely open, sits straight, behaves right, and speaks straight.

A boy with healthy teeth, dressed in simple clothes, cleans his face, cleans his shoes, and cleans his hair without getting stains on his nails.

A boy who behaves agilely and does not make distracting sounds.

A boy who blows his whistle in the streets but doesn’t whistle depending on the time and place.

A boy who is always cheerful laughs well in front of others, and never looks gloomy.

A boy who does not smoke now and will not smoke afterward.

A boy who does not use slang but speaks the only standard language.

A boy who doesn’t push other kids and doesn’t let other kids bother himself.

A boy who honestly says that “I dont know” if he doesn’t know anything, says he’s sorry for anything wrong, knows how to be grateful in everything, and tries to do that when asked to do something.

When talking, a boy looks up straight at the other person and always tells the truth.

A boy who chooses only good books and reads a lot.

A boy who trains his physical strength at the YMCA gym instead of fighting in the corner of his room or having entertainment when he has his spare time.

A boy who doesn’t pretend he knows a lot and doesn’t pretend to be in the eyes of others.

A boy who doesn’t lie or don’t do  anything sneaky in order not to be taken away from school or expelled from school.

A boy that other boys like. A boy who makes girls feel comfortable when dating.

A boy who always reflects with sound pride.

A boy who treats his mother as his best friend in the world.

A boy who wants to stay together because it’s good to be together

A boy who is healthy, happy, and energetic, not pretentious, and not religiously formal.

Such a boy is needed in every home. He is needed at school. He are also needed at government offices and other offices.

The boys also seek such a boy. The girls also seek such a boy. Samramansang seeks also for such a boy.

Author Frank Crane

 

 

34. Smoking prevention and smoking cessation….. …………………………………248

Overview of Smoking Prevention and Smoking cessation

 

 

Photo  6-3. Smoking is harm.

 

Prevent children and adolescents from starting smoking.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

15% of middle school students in the US and 34.5% of high school students smoked, and more than half of them wanted to stop smoking.

In addition, a study found in 2,000 that it was difficult to stop smoking even though they tried to stop smoking any more.

Tobacco is white and harmful, and nicotine in tobacco is a highly addictive, habit-forming substance.

Even if you chew tobacco, bloom, or smoke cigarettes, you will be addicted.

It is not easy to quit smoking once you are addicted to smoking.

Smoking is extremely harmful to the person who smokes, as well as to others around him.

When you breathe in cigarette smoke, it can irritate your eyes, nose, mouth, pharynx, and entire low airways, which can cause tingling. Smoking sometimes makes dizzy and coughing.

The incidence of lung cancer in smokers is more than 10 times that of lung cancer in non-smokers, the incidence of heart disease is much higher, and the incidence of chronic bronchitis, emphysema, and asthma is higher.

If pregnant women smoke, the fetal mortality rate is higher, the birth rate of prematurity and low birth weight are higher.

The person next to the person who smokes is almost as unhealthy as the person who smokes.

Smoking during pregnancy is very harmful not only to the pregnant woman herself but also to the fetus.

Pregnant women should never smoke and should not be near the smokers.

Smokers are not popular with people, and the reality is that they smoke in hiding.

Smoking was not allowed in public places nowadays in the most countries.

The price of smoking is expensive, which also causes economic problems.

It is common for most smoking adults to start smoking from puberty.

Some adults start smoking after reaching adulthood.

Before adolescent children start smoking, we must do our best to prevent both mothers and fathers as well as teachers and society from starting smoking during childhood and adolescence.

Unfortunately, some countries neglect children and adolescents who smoke on the street.

There are several ways to stop smoking.

The fact that you’ve been smoking is harmful to you, that it hurts others, and it hurts you or your family.

Therefore, the ideal way to stop smoking is to stop smoking suddenly after making a decision not to smoke any more.

But the truth is, quitting smoking this way is not that easy.

There are a number of medications that treat you to stop smoking and becoming addicted to nicotine.

These drugs can only be bought by a doctor’s prescription to stop smoking.

The cost of smoking cessation drugs used to stop smoking is considerable.

Smoking cessation drugs can be divided into four types as follows.

Then let’s find out about it. 

Nicotine transdermal systems 

Some of these anti-smoking drugs include Habitrol, Nicoderm, and Nicotrol. These types of smoking cessation drugs are applied to the skin. 

Nicotine polacriles chewing gum 

Smoking cessation drugs in this category contain Nicorette. This type of smoking cessation drug is chewed. 

Nicotine nasal spray 

Smoking cessation drugs in this category include Nicotrol nasal spray and Nicotrol Inhalation. These types of smoking cessation drugs are sprayed into the nasal passages or inhaled directly into the airways. 

Non-nicotine products 

Smoking cessation drugs in this category do not contain Nicotine.

Smoking cessation drugs, such as Bupropion and Zyban, belong to a type of tranquilizer.

Take it orally and use it.

In order to stop smoking, there are acupuncture treatments other than drugs and psychological treatments.

There is still no research literature on the effectiveness of acupuncture or psychophysiological therapy when adolescents are treated to stop smoking.

Parents should educate their children not to start smoking through home smoking education.

It is necessary to continue education from elementary school to high school so as not to start smoking through school health education.

If possible, give annual training and receive treatment if you find children who already smoke.

Pediatricians educate school-age children and adolescents that smoking is bad for the human body through regular pediatric health check-ups, and participate in basic pediatric health education and treatment so that if there are children who smoke, they no longer smoke.

There will be good results in reducing the smoking rate among youth.

The authors provided training to stop smoking, stop smoking, sex education, and drug use prevention education through regular health check-ups for children and adolescents. Health insurance companies should meet compensation for pediatric adolescents and childhood disease prevention education. (Refer to pediatric and adolescent health examination record sheet)

Smoking is harmful to the health of the people around him and incurs enormous wealth loss in solving health problems caused by smoking.

Preventive education should be actively given to children and adolescents to prevent smoking at the national level.

What does not comply with national policy is drug abuse by children and adolescents.

From elementary school to middle and high school, it is necessary to educate about smoking is bad for health, and to provide thorough smoking prevention education.

Studies show that 42% of adolescent children who smoke have been counseled by doctors to stop smoking. 

FDA-Mandated Warnings for Cigarette Packages, 2011 (FDA-Mandated Warnings for Cigarette Packages.) 

• Tobacco is an addictive substance (WARNING: Cigarettes are addictive.)
• Cigarette smoke is harmful to children. (WARNING: Tobacco smoke can harm your children.)
• Tobacco causes fetal lung disease. (WARNING: Cigarettes cause fatal lung disease.)
• Cigarettes cause cancer
• Tobacco can cause heart disease and strokes  (WARNING: Cigarettes cause strokes and heart disease.)
• Smoking during pregnancy is harmful to babies. (WARNING: Smoking during pregnancy can harm your baby.)
• Cigarettes can kill you. (WARNING: Smoking can kill you.)
• Tobacco is the cause of fatal lung disease in non-smokers.
• Quitting smoking now greatly reduces serious risks to your health Source: FDA

 

 

 

35. Sopa, Bang Jung Hwan’s Declaration of Children’s right (1923)……………..251

 

 

Photo 7-6. Sopa, Jeong-Hwan Bang

 

To adults

① Don’t look down on children, but play with them.

② Get close to children and talk to them often

③ Write honorific words to children, but always soften them.

④ Make sure they have a haircut, bath, or clothes in time.

⑤ Make sure they sleep and exercise enough

⑥ Please give them things like walking with you from time to time

⑦ When reproaching a child, don’t be easily provoked and give him a posture.

⑧ Build playgrounds and machines where children can have fun with each other.

⑨ Always remember that the peripheral nerves of the grand universe do not belong to the old, not to the young, but only to children.

 To young comrades

① Let’s make sure they do see the rising and setting sun.

② Let’s be respectful to each other as well as to adults.

③ Let’s not write or draw pictures on the room wall or on any other wall.

④ Let’s not break flowers or grass and have them to love animals.

⑤ On a public bus or the train, let’s give up seats to elders.

⑥ Keep their mouth shut and keep your body right.

 

To adults

 

① Don’t look down on children, play with them.

 

② Get close to children and talk to them often

 

③ Write honorific words to children, but always soften them.

 

④ Make sure they have a haircut, bath, or clothes in time.

 

⑤ Make sure they sleep and exercise enough

 

⑥ Please give them things like walking with you from time to time

 

⑦ When reproaching a child, don’t be easily provoked and give him a posture.

 

⑧ Build playgrounds and machines where children can have fun with each other.

 

⑨ Always remember that the peripheral nerves of the grand universe do not belong to the old, not to the young, but only to children.

 

To young comrades

 

① Let’s make sure them to see the rising and setting sun.

 

② Let’s be respectful to each other as well as to adults.

 

③ Let’s not write or draw pictures on the room wall or on the wall.

 

④ Let’s not break flowers or grass and have them to lovr to animals.

 

⑤ On a public bus or train, let’s give up seats to elders.

 

⑥ Keep their mouth shut and keep your body right.

 

Soap, Bang Jeong-hwan (1899~1931) was Korea’s first child love activist and patriotic enlightenment activist.

By changing the word “baby” or “kidnome” to the word children, emphasizing the human rights of children who were marginalized and undermined in feudal society

Making fairy tales for children

He has produced various magazines such as “Children”.

Source: The Hankook Ilbo. May 3, 1999

 

 

36. 36. Korean War Memorial……251

We have never visited to korea,

We have naver meet Korean,

We have naver known where korea is.

When Korean needed us and asked to help,

Our precious and beloved young sons and daughters from US  went to Korean War to risk our lives and fought.

 

Figure 126. Freedom isn’t just about free

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, M.D., FAAP

Figure 127. At the Korean War Memorial

 Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Figure 128. At the Korean War Memorial

 Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Figure 129. At the Korean War Memorial

 Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Figure 130. At the Korean War Memorial

Our precious and beloved sons and daughters risked their lives and fought when Korea needed people who didn’t see, meet, and did’t know where Korea is. Copyright © 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

36.Bullying, school violence, cyberbullying, teasing  ……255

Definition of bullying

• Surprise or
• Threaten or
• To bother or
• To reveal weaknesses
• Either secretly or openly criticizing
• To make a dispute every time
• Isolate him from others who want to be close to him
• Make it silly
• To harass by using a joke
• Restricting the performance of a role
• Personally ignore
• Bullying is when one individual or group deliberately inflicts physical injury and/or mental pain on another by obscene or other means.

 Overview of bullying

The act of bullying is called bullying.

Bullying is abnormal behavior and is a type of behavioral disorder that cannot be tolerated educationally, socially, or legally.

There were bullying and bullied students in  Korean middle and high school students about 50 years ago, and now middle and high school students are bullying and bullied among students. Recently, bullying is occurring a lot among American middle and high school students.

In the United States, about 6 million students are bullied annually, and about 160,000 students are bullied on campus and during school days.

Many students are afraid of being bullied, fear of what will happen to them, and are reluctant to go to school or even absent from school.

In addition to being bullied on campus, on the way to school, or leaving school, they are also bullied through even the internet.

Bullying and being bullied through the internet is called cyberbullying.

It is said that this kind of bullying is on the rise today and the severity is very serious.

According to a study on bullying with 268 US middle and high school students, 40% of the 268 US middle and high school students were cyberbullying. Among them, girls are said to have been subjected to cyberbullying more than male students. (Source; Pediatrics News June 2008 p16).

It is said that children who are bullying, children who are bullied, their families, schools, society, and the country have mental, social, educational, and economic problems. In the U.S. and in Korea, students who are bullied commit suicide and become crippled. On the other hand, students who are bulling go to jail.

So, in order to solve all the problems arising from bullying, the US is setting up a policy to prevent bullying at the national level.

In addition, according to the national policy, it is trying to prevent disadvantages from occurring and to reasonably resolve the existing disadvantages.

Bullying occurs among kindergarten students, elementary, middle, and high school students, among students entering school, among students dismissing, and also among students at each level, as well as among family members, and among people in one neighborhood. Bullying can also occur among toddlers before entering kindergarten.

It occurs at the highest frequency among middle school students, and it usually occurs less and less after entering high school. However, in that respect, the disadvantage that occurs to high school students is more serious.

The 1999 high school massacre in Colorado, USA, as a result of bullying committed by a bullied student as an act of revenge.

Recently, there was an example of an 11-year-old girl committing suicide by hanging her neck in her room due to be bullied in the United States. (CNN News, April 25, 2009).

Children who are bullied may develop various symptoms such as headache, depression, school refusal, and poor schooling.

At the same time, some children bully other children, and they also do teasing.

According to a Kaiser Family Foundation and Nickelodeon study, 50% of school-age children in the 8-11-year-old age group and 40% of adolescent children in the 12-15-year-old age group were bulling and bullied.

Therefore, the American Academy of Pediatrics and the US Health and Human Services (HHS and HRSA) have set up a bullying solution and prevention policy to prevent bullying from occurring among students, saying that bullying must be strongly prevented and addressed appropriately.

Teachers, students, pediatricians, and parents are educated on how to properly address the bullying that has arisen. Assault, alcohol, substance abuse, suicide, murder, sexual intercourse, teenage pregnancy, runaway, school refusal, depression, rebellion against authority, home invasion, criminal acts, Monetarism, and selfishness are prevalent in adolescent children today. In addition, bullying and teasing behaviors occur in adolescent children, causing parents, teachers, and all walks of life to fall into an anxious state.

It is classified into five types of bullying, in which children inappropriately treat other children or children group physically, mentally, emotionally, verbally, sexually, and cybernetically.

That is, it can be subdivided into physical bullying, verbal bullying, emotional bullying, sexual bullying, and cyberbullying.

Among them, verbal bullying is the most common. Also, sexual bullying is one of the extremely serious bullying behaviors.

In recent years, there is a growing tendency for cyberbullying through the internet or writing.

The behavior of bullying, harassing, teasing, and struggling with other children is also a type of bullying, but this type of bullying is called teasing.

There are also bullyings that attack physically, harass verbally, and manipulate psychologically at the same time.

Alternatively, only one of the various types of bullying may be performed, and/or two of the five bullyings may be simultaneously performed.

There are also bullying acts such as striking, beating, kicking, spitting, and pushing other children for no reason.

In addition, after taking possession of a child who is being bullied, they hide it without returning it, and sometimes he is bullied by physically aggressive behavior such as trapping him somewhere.

They often use offensive languages, such as swearing, malicious teasing, gossip, or blackmail.

Sometimes, bullying is done only verbally, and at the same time, both verbally and physically.

This type of bullying is more common for boys than for girls.

There are less physical bullying toward girls but girls are bullied more psychologically and emotionally to make them feel guilty.

For example, bullying is sometimes done by spreading bad rumors so that a child being bullied can be mentally hurt, by making them bullied by friends or peers group, or by unfairly taking away what they have.

Boys tend to be more physically and sexually bullied than girls.

In general, it is common to be bullied more and repeatedly. Unfortunately, it is common that they are not protected from being bullied.

Also, even if they are bullied, they are more likely to fail to report it to parents, school authorities, or to the appropriate authorities.

For that reason, bullying and being bullied may continue to a certain limit.

Children of the same age group who are physically smaller and younger, lonely, fearful, and who fail to report to their parents, family, or school authorities are more likely to be bullied.

It is said that bullying is a type of serious psychological disorder and behavioral disorder that can occur not only in elementary school students but also in middle and high school students, and it is most common in 6th-grade elementary school students.

Unfortunately, many adults and educators treat bullying behavior as normal behavior for children. They also believe that bullying cannot be prevented and that bullying cannot be stopped.

For that reason, brothers and sisters in a family are bulling and bullied, children living in the neighborhood are bulling and bullied, and children are bullying and bullied at school playgrounds or playgrounds.

According to a study on bullying in middle school students, suicidal and self-harmful behaviors are more likely to occur in students who are bullied than students who are not bullied.

Children who are bullied may develop more anger, have more emotional problems adjusting to school or social life, more negatively view anything in social life, and more school-study disabilities. children can also deny school.

It can be the main cause of poor academic performance, behavioral disorders, anxiety, anxiety, lack of self-esteem, and even mental problems.

Not eating well, physical health problems, headache, abdominal pain, nocturia, sleep problems, etc. can occur.

Drinking alcohol and substance abuse can also be more common in children who are disadvantaged. It can lead to more anxiety and depression. They can even commit suicide and kill themselves.

All bullying can be said to be a form of verbal or physical violence.

Also, most can be treated as some kind of aggressive behavior.

Most of the children who are bullying and the children who are bullied, whether they are boys or girls, they  are bullying other and they are bullied and such a phenomenon is a common scene in the world of children these days. So these days, bullying behavior or teasing behavior is a very common behavioral disorder in school and children’s society.

If a child bullies or tees off other’s children once or continues to bully or tees, parents pay a lot of attention and immediately educate them not to be bullied anymore, and to correct their behavior so as not to make fun of others.

Sometimes older children or children who are taller and stronger than children of other ages are both mentally and physically tormenting children who are younger or weaker than me.

Children are always children. Even adolescent children belong to children

Our parents should not expect their children who grow up and behave maturely like adults, but we must make it clear to them that bullying or teasing other children is cruel and unacceptable behavior.

When a young child is bullied and teased, it is the duty and right of parents to immediately take care of the reason for such misconduct and provide corrective

treatment.

 

Figure 2-28. Bullying prevention educational illustration

Original Source-US Health Human Services

Reasons and reasons for bullying or teasing

① A child who is bullying has a lot of worries or anxiety, he is anxious or weak in mind, is bullied at home or by his peers, he is bullied or teased due to the expression of anger, and is to hide his weaknesses in front of his peers. Overprotective behavior can lead to bullying or teasing.

② Sometimes, teasing or bullying behavior is fun, cute, and clever behavior to others, and there are children who bully and tease.

③ If parents make fun of their children while raising their children, they learn to make fun of others from their parents, and the children make fun of others.

④ You are bullied or teased by big brothers and sisters at home, and you are bullied or teased by other children to express their anger.

⑤ Regardless of the motive or reason for bullying, it is the absolute duty and responsibility of parents to prevent their children from bullying or teasing other children.

⑥ Sometimes, among the peers, they are large and strong, and they can bully or tease in the psychology of leading and leading peers.

⑦ In addition, if a child who is bullied is better at studying than other students, is particularly well dressed, has special school supplies, or is bullied by other children, the child may be bullied or teased.

 

Figure 2-29. An eight-year-old elementary school student in Colchester, Ct, US, not far from the author’s residence, was bullied by students attending the same school. The local police department, state and local government offices, school offices, superintendents, principals, mayors, State Children and Family Offices reported to state human rights authorities and insisted on punishing students for bullying.

Source: Connecticut, USA The Hartford Courant, Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Symptoms of warning signs that your child is being bullied (cyberbullying)

• Children receiving cyberbullying may develop the following signs and symptoms:
• There are many negative emotions or thoughts, such as sadness, anger, frustration, lack of patience, and a lot of worry.
• School grades fall.
• They don’t eat well or they have sleep problems.
• Doesn’t get along well with family or friends.
• They hate to go to school.
• They hate going to social gatherings.
• They hate using computers, cell phones, or other technical devices.
• After receiving an email or text message, it makes him feel bad and puts more stress.
• Avoid using computers. Other sources and references; Pediatric clinics of North America June 2012

If your children are bullied or suffered from being bullied, the solution is as follows.

① Parents should teach their children who teasing or bullying that the act of teasing or bullying is inappropriate and wrong, and educate them to do appropriate and correct behavior. Also, immediately avoid teasing and bullying.

② In the meantime, did parents tease their children without knowing?

Find out if your siblings are teasing or bullying, and if they did, stop teasing and educate your siblings not to tease and bully.

When a child competes for superiority among his siblings or peers, train them to avoid bullying and teasing.

③ It teaches that bullying and teasing are bad behaviors using educational media such as TV or reference books on bullying and teasing when you are usually bullied or teasing.

It is clear that bullying and teasing behavior are inappropriate and absolutely unacceptable misconduct.

④ Encourage people to imagine what they felt when they were bullied or teased and educate others not to be disadvantaged anymore. It teaches that relationships between peers, friends, or siblings should not be bullied or teased and that they should do good thoughts and agreeable behaviors.

⑤ Parents Through conversations with their children, you should frequently find out whether your child is bullying or teasing with other children. If your brothers and sisters no longer bully or teasing off, praise them.

⑥ Bullying or teasing can sometimes be punished by time-outs or behavior restrictions appropriate to the age. Also, you can limit their rights by not allowing them to play with toys anymore. parents also teach children who have been bullied or teased to apologize for verbal mistakes, sometimes by phone or by writing.

⑦ If they don’t bully or teasing, you can give praise and reward to encourage them not to bully or tee.

⑧ In schools, appropriate school rules for correcting bullying or misconduct of students who are teasing are established by the local residents and the educational community related to the school authorities, clinical psychologists, and pediatricians to establish appropriate education and countermeasures. And educate and guide students who are teasing properly.

If possible, the parents of the child who was bullied as early as possible, the parents of the child who was bullied, the head of the school authorities, and teachers met together to find out the motives and reasons for the bullying and received an apology and forgiveness. It should be prevented from occurring.

⑨ In the United States, different school districts have different measures and regulations regarding student misconduct.

⑩ The State  of Connecticut, depending on the degree of bullying or teasing misconduct, trains them by counseling at school, or consults with school authorities and parents.

The delinquency is sometimes treated with the help of a pediatrician or clinical psychologist. When the problem is more serious and simple treatment cannot educate students who are disadvantaged, schools may expel the student.

⑪ Expulsion from school can cause many problems in the future. Expulsion can lead to significant problems negatively at the individual, family, social and national levels. Therefore, expelling school should be a last resort.

⑫ In the United States, expelled students are required by law to receive special education at their local taxes. Connecticut also offers special education from 2 pm to 4:30 pm a day.

It is said that the average cost of education per person per day is about 50 to 70 dollars. This money is directly covered by residents’ taxes.

 

37. Train your children not to lie…..263.

 

Are lies really bad?

Can we live without lying?

Are people who lie a little better morally and ethically than people who lie a lot?

Can we determine the severity of a lie by measuring the degree of a lie with a ruler or weighing it with a scale?

The Greek Diogenes in the 4th century BC lit a lamp in broad daylight throughout his life to look for honest people, but he couldn’t find any truly honest people.

Saint Socrates disappeared from the death penalty for the “sin” of teaching young people how to live truthfully. Honesty could have a negative effect on children and young people of that era (Source: Love each other by Leo Busgaglio p.75).

According to a 1969 US Times study, 6 out of 10 Americans said they could lie when needed.

Then, how do our parents view their children’s lies?

Everybody will agree that our lives should be based on honesty.

We must teach our children to live honestly and train them to live honestly.

What is a lie?

Words made to deceive others are called lies.

The age to discern between lies and true words

Most infants before the age of 4 years-old usually act and speak based on how much their parents like or dislike their actions and words.

Infants and young children before the age of 4 years old considered they are behaving or saying correctly if their mother or father likes what they did or said and acknowledge what they said or did, even though they did not do right.

Also, if the mother or father does not like and does not approve of their words and actions, even if they acted right and spoke correctly, they may think that their words and actions are wrong.

In this way, depending on whether or not they are satisfied with their words and actions, they usually talk and act for their parents.

Immediately before entering elementary school, most of the children begin to clearly discern what “true” means, what “false” means, and what “true” and “lie” mean.

For this reason, it is common that the most children after the age of 5 years-old are not to really lie.

18.2% of 6-years-old school-age children know that the fiction and the facts are different.

Most of the 9-years-old school-age children have the ability to discern fictional and factual stories.

When the school-age children begin to realize that there is a difference between fact and falsehood, they also begin to understand the meaning of lies.

The most 7-years-old school-age children can feel guilty for lying. And they worry that they will be punished because they lied, and they think that they have sinned because they lied. They also worry that God will punish them, and sometimes they pray to God for forgiveness.

The most of the early adolescent children between the ages of 10 and 11 years-old think it is very important to live honestly.They begin to perceive that lying is bad.

The most infants before the age of 3 years-old cannot accurately understand the meaning of the opposite words, such as big and small, many and few, cold and hot.

In addition, it is common to not accurately discern the meaning of honesty or falsehood.

Infants before the age of 3 years old are more often speaking without knowing the meaning of the words they are using.

Because of that, they often stop speaking without knowing whether they are lying or telling the truth.

Sometimes they make up their words fantastically without their knowledge, or they make up lies by exaggerating the facts.

The most school-aged children aged 6-7 years-old begin to understand some of the meanings of words such as truth, fact, honesty, and falsehood.

For infants before the age of 5 years-old or school-age children after that, If parents did not train them  for what “It is bad to lie” and “You should not lie”. Their children will continue to have the habit to lie. The habit may lead to puberty and adulthood.

It is here again to be reminded of the importance of parents’ responsibility for raising and training their children. It can be presumed that children and adults in the some country useed to lie in the their lives.

Classification of lies

• Lies can be divided as followings

• Fantastic lies,
• Lies to imitate,

• Lies to exaggerate,
• Lies to make good ,
• Lies to defend,
• Lies to draw attention,
• Lies to revenge,
• Lies to rebel,
• Morbid lies

Fantastic lie

It is called a fantastic lie to tell fantastically the story without telling the truth as it is.

When there is no fun in everyday life, when one’s own thoughts are different from those of others , when he brings out a situation to his advantage,  when he wants to receive more love from his parents, when he fantasizes about what is not real and makes a fantastic lie.

Some parents consider some times they can lie in a fantastic way, and It’s nothing wrong to lie like that, They don’t care about it even if lie is  a fantastic way, and they don’t educate their

children that they shouldn’t lie. This is wrong parental education.

When the meaning of fact and the meaning of fantasy cannot be clearly discerned, and when the meaning of these two words is confused, children will tell fantastic lies.

It is common to unconsciously tell fantastic lies in the minds of toddlers and early school-age children without any reason.

For example, toddlers and early school-age children often hear fantastic stories about ghosts, mountain god, and tigers.

In addition, when infants or early school-age children play at school or at home as a role of a prince, a dog, a lion, or a deer.

Sometimes they pretend to eat wood chips and play with them.

In this way, they play by deliberately creating stories and actions that are very different from the facts.

In addition, parents who watch young children or early school-age children who make fantastic stories interestingly compliment them a lot.

While raising infants or early school-age children, young infants and early school-age children listen to and learn a lot without knowing about the fantastic lies, and sometimes makeup themselves.

It can be that telling fantastic lies is part of normal growth and development.

However, if they make up their words fantastically and lie a lot, if the degree is severe, they are abnormal.

Teach them to tell the truth and tell them that when they say a lot of fantastic lies, facts and fantasy are different.

Find out whether they are lying by making up their words fantastically or simply by making up your face. Fantastic lies can sometimes be made to escape from uninteresting or unpleasant situations.

It can’t be argued that such behavior is wrong because it takes time to know the difference between the facts and the words made up.

Most of the first-year elementary school students can’t discern between facts and fantastic stories.

For example, when a father pretends to eat, saying, “I’m going to eat you because you’re sweet,” there are also infants and toddlers who think they are really eating themselves.

In this way, Parents teach infants and toddlers who do not know the difference between facts and fantasy lies by comparing fantasy and facts.

When watching TV programs, such as fantastic cartoons, animals, or shows, teaches parents how to tell if the scenes are true or fantastic.

Whether the scene is not true or ask why it is not true, the hero is a true existence or creation, whether a person can fly in the air, what will happen if a dog is hit by a car, and so on. Listen and teach the difference between facts and fantastic stories.

Reads a book that has a real story and a fantastic story, and explains how to tell whether it is a real story or a fictional story. Buy age-appropriate books from the book store to differentiate between facts and fantastic stories.

Lies to imitate (imitate lies)

In fact, without telling other people, children can make it funny, and imitate it very differently.

In this case, it is called a lie to imitate.

Infants and toddlers and early school-age children are not well developed and immature in their ability to judge self-righteousness and discernment, so they cannot clearly discern between real lies and jokes made.

In particular, they grow up by seeing, learning from their parent’s life, and they are imitating each and every action and word of their parents who truly love and raise them.

If parents pretend to lie in front of infants or early school-age children without telling the truth, or lie in a fun way to exaggerate the facts, children can imitate well, and as a result, lie to imitate.

Parents themselves often make mistakes in this way in front of infants and children of early school age and live without knowing that they are making such mistakes.

It is common for children and adolescents raised in such homes to not clearly discern truth from falsehood.

Lies to exaggerate (exaggerate lies)

Some children and adolescents exaggerate and brag well.

Sometimes this kind of lie isn’t a serious problem, but you should never encourage them to lie to exaggerate.

When parents exaggerate or brag differently than the facts, the children and adolescents of such parents resemble their parents and exaggerate, make up words and lie.

It is common for adults to become angry when children and adolescents tell a little lie, but the adults do well in front of children and adolescents by telling lies that exaggerate the facts.

Lies in good faith (lies in good faith)

There are people who lie that if they don’t want to go to where they were invited invited, they says that thay can’t go there because they have already received another invitation. Some people are good at telling lies of goodness like this.

Good lies are also one kind of lie.

However, if you often tell a good lie in front of your school-age or adolescent children, children can’t distinguish between true speaking truthful and good lie.

People who live with a lot of good lies sometimes also many other kinds of red real lies.

In today’s complex and turbulent society, children and adolescents do not understand the lives of parents who are constantly receiving various pressures, oppressions, and coercion, defeating them one by one, and living steadfastly.

So children and adolescents don’t know for sure why their parents tell such a good lie.

Children raised by parents who are telling good lies will learn to blame others for what they do not want to do or want to avoid, to let others do what they don’t want to do, or to blame others for their wrongdoing, or to avoid social pressure, they will do good lies as if they were eating daily meals.

Anyone who often and habitually tells good lies can be a real bad liar.

Lies to defend (defense lies)

Most of the children lie to defend themselves that it is not their fault to avoid being punished,  when they think their behave wrong and should be punished appropriately for their wrongdoing. It is said to be a lie to defend against such lies.

When they have to be held accountable for what they’ve done wrong, they can lie to defend that they are not responsible for it.

There are many things that children and adolescents should not do inside or outside the house, what they can do, and many rules to follow.

However, most of them don’t know all the rules to follow, what they shouldn’t do. They also don’t understand the meaning of the rules or restrictions their parents have made for them, and sometimes they forget about those rules or restrictions completely, and they can break them without obeying them even though they know they exist.

Nevertheless, many parents want their children and adolescents to behave 100% flawlessly and according to the rules or restrictions set by their parents.

And they know for themselves that children are breaking rules and restrictions set by their parents.

Many parents worry that their children will make even the smallest mistakes and want their children to do their own right.

Sometimes children don’t meet their parents’ expectations.

Sometimes it is necessary to make sure that children and adolescents do not obey and do not meet the expectations of their parents, and whether their children are immature and incapacitated and act contrary to their expectations.

Parents must clearly discern these two conditions so that their children will not lie.

If your young child has behaved inappropriately, the parent should ask him or her what motivated him or her to behave inappropriately.

Acknowledging wrongdoing can result in punishment for wrongdoing, and if you are not sure if the children did wrong, you cannot punish your children.

Some children in a similar situation can lie to avoid punishment.

Some children think about what’s wrong with lying to avoid being punished and misbehaving.

So they do wrong and they keep lying.

Some of the children are forced to make promises that are difficult to keep the promise to do so.

Also, children who do not know the meaning of the promise may be considered lying if they do not keep the promise after making the promise.

In fact, they didn’t try to keep their promise, but they lied because they didn’t keep the promise.

Their behavioral restrictions should be age-appropriate and don’t have too many rules in place.

It’s easy to lie if you clearly ignore or break rules or restrictions and ask your children why they did it.

As far as possible, you shouldn’t ask why.

When investigating the reason for breaking the rules, if children are confused , it is better not to investigate further and do not ask vague questions.

In such a situation, they can lie with the intent to escape.

In such a case, the punishment corresponding to the lying itself and the punishment corresponding to the behavior he committed should also be given.

There are also children who lie and immediately accept that they have done something wrong, and then wright away they say that they have not done so wrong, and then they remain silent without giving any answers, and then they can lie again after the first lie, thinking that a lie will have negative consequences.

If you believe that they have lied for one or another reason, it is important not to ask questions about the reason for the lie, but to give no chance to talk.

Instead of blaming the child, pointing out false lies and punishing them for lying if necessary will prevent them from telling defensive lies again.

They can lie as a means of getting out of the way without being punished for wrongdoing.

When they are in a difficult situation, they can lie to get out of the situation.

Educate them that they should not be intimidated, deceived, or cheat while living.

Those who live honestly are educated that they are respected by others and that it is wrong and sin to bad behave or lie.

The discipline that it is much better to live honestly than to live with the guilt.

Parents must show complete honesty when dealing with their children.

In addition, parent must be honest about anything between couples and show your children that they do so.

Parents teach that parent-child or marital relationships should be based on trust and honesty.

Parents teach that it is very important to live honestly so that parents and others can trust them.

Lies for retaliation (retribution lies)

They can steal, disobey, or lie to get revenge.

Some children lie to make their parents angry.

For example, when a parent asks “Where have you been?”, he knows for sure that there are rules for not going to the swimming pool without his parents’ permission, and knowing that parents will be angry if he goes to the swimming pool alone without his parents He can lie, saying, “I went to the swimming pool.”

In this way, you can lie to retaliate.

By telling a lie to revenge, it shakes the heart of the parents and makes the parents angry.

In reality, parentse can often see their children lying to retaliate.

This is especially seen in children who express their anger through passive-aggressive behavior.

They may lie to retaliate against parents who do not treat them fairly, hoping that their parents will treat them fairly, and they can lie revenge when brothers become jealous, and parents are more interested in other siblings. If parents take care of other child or love more, some children can lie to revenge on their parents.

Lies for praise or reward (praise or reward lie)

They can lie to get compliments or rewards from their parents.

Young children who grow up under their parents who want their children to do their best and who want them to be successfully are often under considerable pressure from their parents without their knowledge.

Younger children usually do not meet their parents’ expectations. Nevertheless, they try to do their best to entertain parents and to achieve their responsibilities successfully.

They also evaluate whether they can achieve them.

And they set the direction they live in and want to go in that direction.

In this growth and development process, they can lie to their parents in order to rationalize their wrongdoing without their knowledge.

Young children who are immature and forced to do difficult things can lie.

They can also lie in front of their parents to show them what they did well.

Lies to rebel (rebellious lies)

They can lie in the face of being attacked for bad or as a means of rebelling against something.

When parents keep begging their children for something to do, parents learn that their child is lying when their parents replies, “I’m so busy I can’t accept your request.”

The child can lie just as their parents lie.

If a parent or family member keeps asking him for something to do, parents can upset children or them by refusing to respond rebelliously or refusing to do so, making negative excuses, giving false evidence, or lying.

Lies to get attention (attention lies)

Children who want more unconditional love and care from their parents can lie.

For example, if children know they haven’t done their math homework, they can lie to their parents that they have done their homework.

When children tell a lie, their parents know that children are lying, and parents know in advance that then they will be punished for the lie.

They can lie because they think it’s much better to pay attention to theie parents.

Pathological lies (pathological lies)

Lies that are said to have no definite interest or reason for themselves are called pathological lies.

I sometimes see early adolescent children telling these pathological lies.Pathological lies can continue even after adulthood.

It is common to engage in acts such as stealing or running away from home.

Preventing lies and coping with lies

Parents shouldn’t even tell good lies that they don’t think will harm others.

Most young children cannot clearly discern between good and malicious lies.

That’s why children shouldn’t even learn to tell good lies from their parents.

While raising children, parents should base their dealings in front of children and adolescents based on trust and honesty.

Parents should educate children that lying is bad and wrong and that as a parent, their bad behavior which parents can’t just bear.

Teach your children that they should not lie without giving them the opportunity to lie.

As far as possible, avoid asking about the motives and reasons for lying.

Asking why the child did lie in addition to the lie, so it’s best not to ask about the motives and reasons for lying.

Of course, there are exceptions.

If parents know why their children lied, parents need to fix it as well.

Many people sometimes exaggerate facts to make lies and even tell good lies.

Even so, parents are very upset when their children of children and adolescents tell a little lie.

Most of the pre-4 year’s old children are based on what their parents like and don’t like, they act and know that they do well if their parents seem to like their behavior, and if their parents don’t like what their children do, their parents think that their children’s behavior is bad. As already mentioned that it is normal.

Infant children who know that their mother will be upset if their mother knows that they have broken a precious vase,  sometimes tries to solve what they have done by lying that they did not break the vase even after breaking the vase because they did not want to upset her.

The infants with lots of chocolate on their faces and hands can lie out loud and say I didn’t eat chocolate out of the bottle.

When a young infant is taken to a zoo and parents cheat his infan age in order to admit their child for free admission, the infant knows exactly what the parents are lying about.

Sometimes the toddler can embarrass his parents by saying aloud to his dad, “I’m not 3 yeas-old, I’m 4 years old.”

If a dad who is speeding, ignoring a stop sign and violating a traffic violation falsely testifies to a traffic cop in front of his young children, they can learn to lie by seeing his dad lying.

Seeing a lying father and wondering why he would lie like that, sometimes the child can grow up and become the biggest liar in the world. So we must not let the children go into the cell.

How pitiful this is.

Sometimes, a big lie makes me feel like I’m sitting in a cell.

There are many good lies in order to gain face or not to damage other people’s feelings, but young children cannot clearly distinguish between a bad real lie and a good lie, so neither good lie nor unknowingly in front of young children.

It teaches the meaning of honesty, facts, and fakes.

From infancy, 2-4 years old, parent teaches the difference between facts and non-facts (false) to infant children according to their maturity.

There is not much knowledge in the minds of young children.

They see, hear, and record and store things in their minds that happen in the lives and society of their parents, brothers, and sisters, and they grow up.

Assuming that the dad is a monster, and playing with a little toddler child, that toddler can be surprised to know that dad really is a monster.

And they can doubt that Dad is really a monster.

In this way, we can teach the difference between fact and fake, and whether Dad really is a monster or whether a monster really exists in this world, etc., through such jokes, teaches the difference between fact and story.

There is a record similar to a video record in their children’s heads.

They keep in their minds everything they see and hear. After that, when parents play the record, what children see and hear comes back and they do what they see and hear.

It is not so wrong to say that most of the behavior shown to children comes from parents’ models and society.

Remember everything children and hear from parents who love you and respect you.

In addition, children and adolescents see, hear, learn, and remember each and every word and action of leaders who are fighting for superiority in society.

It is very important for parents to live honestly and set an example for children and adolescents.

However, parents can think of these words as if parents could say and hear them only in a dream.

It teaches that people who live honestly can always be winners.

Don’t be encouraged to lie.

Parents can do research to learn the motives and processes of their children’s wrongdoing or lying.

In the process of asking how children did wrong and why they lied, parents may encourage them to lie to them again.

When a parent saw a child standing with a broken cookie jar with cookie crumbs on his face, his mother said, “You went up there. and I told you not to take down the cookies, but you ate the cookies without my permission and broke the cookie jar?” When his mother asked, the child could answer “no” while looking at his mother with an innocent face.

The child ate a cookie and brok the cookie jar, but he did lie again at the mother’s question.

He made double trouble.

In the process of finding out the motives for doing the wrong thing in this way, by addressing the wrongdoings and lies while asking more about the obvious wrongdoings already, even an honest child can lie more.

The child who was told to lie that “my friend had a horse and rode it” Mother corrected her, saying, “The child’s friend did not ride a horse, but a donkey and your friend did not own a horse.”

As in this example, children have a tendency to show off, and they tend to lie in exaggeration. Teach them to speak honestly at such an opportunity, not to exaggerate, to speak honestly.

The children can choose to lie because they’re worried about punishment for being honest about their wrongdoing. As there is a saying, “If you lie, there will be nothing more to lose”, if you act badly and tell your parents that you did not lie, you will not get punished, and even if you do something bad, you may just pass by. For this reason, they will be lied to, so be careful.

Do not be sure to ask questions or ask the child for the wrong behavior and why you are wrong. “I’m really upset about what you did wrong,” prents say sternly, “I’ll punish you for breaking the cookie jar when you go there.”

When your child lies to deny that he didn’t do something wrong, you should ignore the word and focus on the first thing he did wrong.

If the parents don’t know exactly how he has not done it wrong, but his parents believe that the child was definitely wrong, don’t ask about the motives and process that made him wrong, but say positively that you did this in my opinion.

Emphasize whether the parents believe someone else did it and he or she didn’t when the child lied that “you didn’t break the vase.” Lies and wrongdoings treat both faults together and punish each fault.

Explain that “if your child does something wrong, you don’t get upset if your child says the truth.”

Explain, “If you lie again, it is wrong because you lie twice.”

What parents say to their younger children must be put into action.

The parents shouldn’t be punished severely for lying.

If the parents punish a young child too often, he can lie again to avoid punishment if he or she does something wrong.

 You must punish for wrongdoing and punish for lying.

In addition to punishing for wrongdoing, if children lie for wrongdoing and add a lie to that lie, you must also punish for the second lie. In other words, you must be punished with triple punishment.

Punishment for eating cookies out of a cookie jar without permission.

The next day, his parent does not give cookies, and for lying to his mother that he “did not eat cookies,” he is punished so that he cannot eat cookies for next two days by not giving them the next day.

In this case, punishment for about 1 week is severe depending on the age and the degree of lying and wrongdoing.

If you go to another house instead of going to a friend’s house after school, it is appropriate to be punished for two days after school.

It is recommended that the amount of punishment for lying is approximately equal to the amount of punishment for going to another home without permission.

Train your little ones to misbehave and lie in this way, and they’ll be honest when they’re doing bad things and lying.

If your child lie to a lie, the parents will be punished double amount, and if the child does not lie to you no more, you will be punished only half, and he will be honest and not lie.

Furthermore, he will grow up to become an adult who lives honestly and proudly.

He won’t be sitting in a prison cell for years.

It is important to punish the lie itself, but it is also important to teach him to tell the truth honestly and honestly that he lied.

Train by emphasizing the vital importance of acting and speaking truthfully and honestly in life.

When a young child behaves honestly, praise it immediately.

Teaching not to lie in this way and training to live honestly may seem simple, but it is the most difficult aspect of raising children.

If your child breaks a bottle while eating a snack and apologizes for it, praise him as a good child who honestly apologizes for his wrongdoing.

And you should only punish the bottle of cracked cookies.

Make a notebook that records your child’s honest words and actions every day, and write down the honest words and actions that day.

Review the notebook that day and praise him for what he did well.

You can also tell and praise others for your child’s honest behavior in front of them.

 It is a good education for older school-age children to be honest and to write down in their notebooks that they have done a good job every week and to be seen and reviewed by their parents every week.

Being honest and truthful can give you privileges, rewards, and sometimes unexpected gifts.

When giving privileges or rewards for honest words and actions, give him to the extent that common sense makes sense.

If he tells his parents the truth about what you’ve been to a place without permission, even before it’s belatedly revealed, compliment him for telling him.

In the future, I can give you the privilege of saying that he shouldn’t go anywhere without his parents’ permission, and since parents can trust you, next time you can go to another suitable place.

If your child goes somewhere and comes on time, parents can give him the privilege to go again, and in this way, parents can gradually increase the privilege one by one according to the pace of growth.

Voluntarily apologizing for the wrongdoing after a child’s wrongdoing and before the parents are aware of the wrongdoing can result in less punishment than usual. However, training in this way can sometimes manipulate parents, so be careful.

If the children have lied in the past, but then act honestly and speak truthfully, it is worth rewarding and praising it.

And parents have to train them to keep speaking honestly and doing things right.

If this is the first time your child has forgotten an english book at school, you should honestly say thank you, and in return, help your child to figure out and find a way to find the book with their child, and not punish them for first misbehaving.

If the child speaks and acts honestly, it is appropriate to gradually increase your praise and privileges as his age.

Training in lies, honesty,  and truth is adjusted according to the pace of growth.

If your child takes a lie seriously and repeats it, you should seek professional help.

If adolescent children 10 to 11 years old of age or older are seriously lying or have emotional problems with them, they should seek professional advice.

Some young children cannot discern between facts and fantasies, while some infants and school-aged children can discern between facts and illusions, but they cannot regret that the lie is wrong after they lie.

Some children are lying maliciously when they know they are lying.

These lies are dangerous lies and require expert help.

38. Falsehood and Truth……264

For two months during our 30yeas-marriage life, my wife and I took a long trip to my home country, Korea.

Jukma-Ji-woo

I met one of the best friends there and spent a week traveling together. He was an alumini who attended the elementary, middle, and high school with me and was Jukma-Ji-woo.

He was not so big or small, and he was handsome and good looking with a body shape.

When he was in the schools, he was well known as “a child who believes in Jesus.”

He was a very nice boy who spoke very little and couldn’t even tell good lies.

He paid his school tuition on time and wearing school uniforms neatly according to the school rules.

I had never seen his sloppy wearing, and he put his school hat in the place.

When he was a friend who walked with his shoulders wide open and looking straight ahead.

He wrote without wasting a piece of notebook or a corner and was a frugal friend who sharpened the pencil until he was no longer grabbing it in his hand.

His school grades always topped in the class.

Of course, he never did anything that offends the hearts of his peers or other students in his class, and he was a good-looking student.

Classroom cleaning when the duty day came, the other students on duty would run away without cleaning, but he would clean up the large classroom by himself alone and went home late after school. He did not criticize others and did at his best in whatever the teacher-directed.

He was told that he respected and loved by his parents and family and grown-ups and that he had strong friendships with his brothers and sisters.

There was a lot of praise for the quick and good personnel.

His teachers at school and the elders in the neighborhood liked him very much.

However, it seemed that his popularity was not so at his high school for his peers.

He was like a gentle and honest old man.

I liked him then and now.

45 years after graduating from high school we went together, I met him in my home country and started a trip to Korea from Chilgapsan Mountain in Cheongyang, Chungcheong Province.

The next day, we went to Buyeo.

The Baekma River flowing quietly while relaxing, and Mt. Buso, standing tall without any words, was also seen.

The next day, he drove through the Mangyeong Plain in the lower reaches of the Mangyeong River, passing through Gimje and Iksan, Jeollabuk-do.

When I passed the Mangyeong Plain and went to Gunsan City, I was reminded of Tolstoy’s Book “How much land does one person need?”

After that, we arrived at Byeonsan Peninsula, where the seafood is abundant and beautiful.

After taking some pictures of the scenery, I arrived in Mokpo City through Jeonju City and Gwangju City.

We had the opportunity to see the beautiful Mokpo City and Namhae from Mt. Yudalsan for the first time.

We visited Jindo’s Uldolmok, Jindo Bridge, and then Unlim Sambang.

After that, my friend guided us until we went to Haenam Land’s End, Jeong Yak-Yong Memorial Hall, Nageung Epseong Folk Village, Mt. Jirisan, and Haeundae in Pusan.

Next, my wife and I  without my friend set up a two-week trip to Korea by bus, passing Pohang, Gyeongju, Donghae-Sea, Gangneung, Uljin, Sokcho, Goseong, Korea Unification Observatory, Mt. Seorak, Gyeonggi-do, and Seoul, and returning to the Dogo Oncheen in Chungnam.

I will go back to the story I spent with my dear friend.

The clothes he wore and his words and actions were modest, not much different from the old days when he attended elementary, middle, and high school with me.

Modesty,  gentle, sincere, humble and loving deeds from him. Truly he was the real truth.

Both of his children are said to have succeeded.

He told me about the following to me and my wife.

Nowadays, he told a story that many men and women are separated these days in Korea. These days, in Korea, they ride a car only for 5-6 years and changed to a new car.

When going to Southeast Asia, 90% of the passengers on the plane are Korean travelers, and 90% of them them are Korean women.

When traveling to Southeast Asia, people from that country ride a lot of used Korean

cars bought from Korea.  Korean used cars were driving without erasing Korean propaganda signs such as “Myeongdong Bingsu”, which were printed to cars before being sold to the country.

They were eating every day’s fruits or vegetables grown with insecticide, and the people died from insecticidal expose poisoning and then they were buried in the ground and the bodies can not become rot because of insecticidal contamination.

If the road is blocked by a big mountain, the tunnel will be made through the mountain, and if it is blocked by a river, a bridge will be built across the river.

It is said that Korea is the first country in the world to have a total road capacity per unit area after Germany.

As new roads are built in a super short period of time, residents nearby can not know when new roads was built and where and where they are coming and going.

He also explained the story of the Korean world to me endlessly.

I heard that half of the story was right and half would be wrong and turned it over. He was actually a friend who didn’t pretend to know.

When I lived in the United States for a few decades, the two of us talked about the history of the world in the East and the West, struggling with what we saw and heard.

So how about your living?

Difficult.

Why ?

Well I mean.

There are no strong people these days.

What do you mean?

You know it. A world that only I know, a world where neither parents nor siblings know, but only money.

I mean Mysm.

I only know.

You know it.

what?

That.

When we grew up, we could not eat because we did not have food. Those who lived in shacks, dirty work, difficult work, dangerous work, and there was a time when there was nothing to do with everything.

Where were the people in the world who could not eat because they have nothing to eat?

Nowadays there are some people who starve because they don’t want to put it in their mouth.

There are many empty houses where people do not live here and there.

Breaking such empty houses with national money is also a big deal.

I read a newspaper article like that.

Anyone hates to live in an old apartment building now.

Even in a new apartment that was just built, if you don’t like the interior equipment and decorations a little, the interior decorations will be removed and redecorated.

It is said to change to special building materials such as marble, cherry red flooring, and wood imported from foreign countries such as Indonesia and Italy.

No, when I was invited to one of the professor’s house in Korea, his apartment was decorated with high-quality building materials that I had never heard of or seen in my lifetime, and the high-quality wooden floors, luxurious and expensive furniture, a TV hanging on the wall, and a flat computer monitor were all over in the house. A story that cannot be found in the country.

I like to live the way it was.

I don’t know what a credit card is, I don’t have a cell phone or a car.

Why do you need that?

Yes, do you regret it?

No.

So why are you talking about that?

I don’t know why the world works like this either.

Just as 3,000 laddies lived in the Pakje nations fell like flower petals from Nakhwaam and died, just committing suicide and finding a rotten body a few days after death!

When spring comes, bodies float in the Han River in Seoul.

Sometimes the light of worrying about something was in his eyes.

Not all of them?

Sure.

Then I brought up with a ” False and Truth” story.

“There were two very close elementary school friends who lived in one neighborhood as a child.

The two friends accidentally met on the day on the street after a few years.

One friend’s name was “real( truth)” and the other friend’s name was “fake(falsehood).”

The fake was tall, handsomely and nice, wearing gold-framed glasses, an Italian made tie, and a nice luxury suit.

He wore a Gucci belt and Gucci shoes and a Rolex watch on his wrist.

Truly, he appeared to be one of the undoubtedly wonderful international gentlemen.

Contrary to that, the truth was wearing a yellow top suit and jeans with black and blue stripes. It was not washed for a while, the clothes smelled.

His suit didn’t fit at all and didn’t fit.

These days, the plastic watches that even children don’t take up well, the wrinkled shoes that have never been polished, and the sloppy face was pale as if they couldn’t eat it.

The most successful friend is fake!

How did you do that?

I’ll tell you later.

But you really!

How is your life?

I tried a lot to buy well.

I don’t know how difficult it is to live.

Why?

Really difficult.

Living is like that and sometimes it doesn’t.

But did you really have breakfast?

I don’t know if I ate it.

I fought every day on the battlefield for the problem of eating.

Why?

That’s it.

Then follow me.

Follow me.

I will.

Thinking about what to eat well after a long time…

Really, I have one request for you.

From now on, you must never say a word to anyone while you are with me.

You should not say even a word…

Understand.

I can promise.

Do what you tell me…

When I was in school, I walked side by side with him on the streets of the town for a while, as if walking as two people, and entered the best restaurant in the town.

Under the Italian-made crystal Sandler lanterns, the mahogany table was exceptionally flashy and sat on a chair with a gold frame.

The waiter was happy to see Fake and Truth to come to eat.

However, The waiter is seeing Truth, why did you follow him like this and asked him go out?

Fake pulls the Truth’s arm and let him sit on the chair and let him to eat together.

He looked at the waiter.

Of course, he didn’t even say a word.

Since then, Fake ordered the most delicious foreign wines, drank heartily, and drank cognac.

As soon as the foods entered our mouth, we ate a lot of charcoal-grilled beef ribs that melted away, and also had delicious steamed corn and bread, dessert, and a cup of tea.

Fake told the story of his life to Truth without even breathing.

Really, Truth just listened to and didn’t say a word.

Time passed quickly and the dinner came.

High-class peoples in the town began to gather from all over the town.

Fake took this opportunity.

Call loudly waiter!

Bring change money.

Why aren’t you giving me change money?

Again loudly.

The waiter whose face was washed out.

What change?

I ate 1000 dollars and gave me 600 dollars for change.

You have to give me $600 change.

No, when did you pay it?

What kind of waiter is?

You will me!

I gave it to you earlier.

You did not give me….

Really!

Hey! you saw me to give it.

Tell this kid what you see.

Truth didn’t say a word, but his eyes really blinking.

Precious people in the town started to begin to gather for the dinner.

I ate 400 dollars worth and paid 100o dollars, so give me back 60o dollars.

Where in the world is a restaurant like this.

Did you see it?

That I pay 1000 dollars.

Again, False asked Truth to tell out loud.

At this time, Truth was still without saying a word and with a blue face.

The owner pulled a wallet out of the pocket behind his pants and handed him $60o without saying anything.

After counting the 600 dollars, False put it in the Gucci wallet, and then put the wallet in the inner pocket of the suit.

Thank you.

As if saying hello, Fake took out a toothpick from the table and left the restaurant while picking his teeth.

Truth went this way and Fake walked the other way.

After that, it is said that Truth has never met Fake.

My friend who heard this story was silent for a moment.

And you know.

The world is full of such Fakes these days.

Our parents should teach their children to beware of Fakes.

 This world where these fakes live is a prison and hell when they die.

Source-A story that turns Greek human tales into different stories,

Author. Content has been added, modified, and translated.

 

 

38. Feelings of guilt, Jealous, Manipulation, Bullying in the adolescent society …… 273

In order to understand adolescent children well and to help them well, it is necessary to understand the social background of the adolescent children in which they live.

To do this, you need to know how adolescent children’s society works.

Ross Campbell, a pediatric psychiatrist, said that the society of adolescents is in some ways similar to the society of the chickens.

Each adolescent child is directly and indirectly related to each other in adolescent society.

Chicken society is ranked by according to how strong, popular, or well accepted in the chicken world.

The rank of adolescent children’s society is usually determined by the physical strength, popularity, and capacity of each adolescent child.

In other words, the ranks in the adolescent society are determined by how well they exercise, how strong their fists are, how popular they are, and how well they can be accepted and welcomed by other adolescent children.

In adolescent children’s society, adolescent children’s interactions are interconnected like a delusional  organization.

In order for my adolescent children to grow and develop as members of adolescent society with sound self-respect, it is important to find out where my adolescent belong in the delusional organization of the adolescent society.

In most cases, some of the problems adolescents’ fear and suffer are related to the problems of other adolescent children in the adolescent society and to their peers.

Most of the problems associated with peers in the delusional organization of adolescent children are usually related to either one of jealousy, guilt, anger, or depression, or more.

So you need to find out if your adolescent has any problems related to jealousy, guilt, manipulation , anger, or depression.

Feelings of guilt and jealousy naturally arise in adolescents’ social relationships with their peers.

The guilt or jealousy of adolescent children often causes various problems in the society of adolescent children.

When an adolescent child enters into a relationship with his peers, he can control his peers after he or she unconsciously or consciously develop guilt or jealousy.

So, the adolescent child has a feeling of guilt or jealousy in his or her heart, and he or she  uses guilt or jealousy to control his or her peers. Still, they may not even realize that they are guilty or jealous. Also, the guilt or jealousy causes a lot of mental pain. Even those ages who live in confusion don’t even know why such confusion is occurring.

If, for example, a child’s problem is related to his or her peers or friends who are lower in the ranks of the adolescent society, the adolescent child may feel guilty.

When the adolescent child’s problems are related to his or her peers or friends who are higher in rank than him or her in their adolescent society, it is common for the adolescent to become jealous.

In the society of adolescent children, when problems related to understanding, problems related to rank, or conflict arise, jealousy will arise for peers or friends at the lower ranks, and guilt is usually aroused to peers or friends at the upper ranks.

You need to know where your adolescent children are in the ranks in the delusional organization of adolescent children’s society, and what kind of conflict, guilt, jealousy, envy, etc., and to what extent they are suffering from mental pain. This can help your adolescent more effectively.

In addition, it is necessary to find out how adolescent children cope with conflicts caused by incidents related to their peers in adolescent society and how much guilt or jealousy arises.

In order not to suffer from guilt and jealousy in adolescent society, explaining the following situations to adolescent children and educating them about the mechanisms by which guilt and jealousy arises will help adolescents in many ways to better solve the problems they face in their society.

You need to be able to understand exactly what is happening to your adolescent children in the adolescent delusion and why.

You need to help your adolescent judge for himself whether what he or she did was right or not.

Teach your adolescent children how to cope with other situations that are similar to those adolescent children have experienced.

If your adolescent is feeling guilty for a problem with other adolescent children, you should teach them to make sure that they are guilty about what they are feeling.

It is taught that guilt can be caused by the wrongdoing of adolescent children themselves, and that it can also be caused by jealousy of other adolescent children.

If you are sure that your adolescent’s problem was not caused by the child’s fault and that it was due to the jealousy of other adolescent children, explain that fact.

If your adolescent child is jealous of another adolescent, but you don’t know if the child is jealous, it is helpful to teach that adolescent child that there is jealousy in the heart of the adolescent and explain and understand the reason for the jealousy.

If your adolescent child has jealousy, but there is no real reason to be jealous, you need to understand it so that you don’t get jealous.

If you have real grounds for jealousy, you should teach them how to no longer be jealous.

Parents should be in a position to be able to help at any time in adolescent society to properly deal with the various issues of envy and jealousy.

For example, my daughter Jini graduated from the middle school as senior. At that time, Jini’s friends said, “I sincerely congratulate you on graduating as senior. He said he was very proud of being her friend.”

One day after that, Jin-i was in an embarrassing position. When she learned the reason in detail, one or two of her friends who were quite jealous were making Jin-i feel guilty and adjusting her.

“Hey, look at that pretty Chinky! I think Jin-i is the best because she is smart. Your brother and dad gave you a daily tutoring class at home, so you won first place. It seems that she knows that she is the best in the world.” He shouted out to Jin-i and made her feel guilty.

In that situation, Jin-i was obsessed with the miserable mood common to adolescent children. Jin-i couldn’t solve the problem herself. And Jini was even being bullied.

I explained, “You studied hard to get the first place, you weren’t a bad child, you didn’t do bad things, there’s no basis for guilt, and it’s a job that’s been adjusted to make you feel guilty because you’ve been conspiring.” Jini’s mother helped Ji-ni with all her power in explaining why Ji-ni became guilty.

The jealousy and guilt that Ji-ni experienced is a common example of adolescent children’s society.

Be a parent who understands that your adolescent child may be guilty or jealous.

Make sure your peers know that they can feel guilty or jealous. So you have to help them to grow up normally, mentally and emotionally.

If you help your adolescent learn how to properly handle conflicts and problems caused by jealousy or guilt, his mental and emotional health will be very good.

If adolescent children fail to properly deal with the conflict and mental pain caused by guilt or jealousy, they are likely to be negatively manipulated by guilt or jealousy.

 

40.Stealing in children and adolescents(1)… 276

• The act of “taking someone else’s property as mine without the owner’s permission” is called stealing or stealin behavior.
• They do not express “stealing” the behavior of young infants and toddlers who simply do what they own without permission.
• Also, if possible, it is better not to use the word “stealing” even in the case of children and adolescents.
• It’s a contradictory statement, but here, “steal.” or “stealing” is used for convenience.
• Rarely, children and adolescents steal something. In particular, it is relatively common for infants to steal things from others.
• When any children and adolescents have behavioral problems in stealing, parents do  hesitate to bring them to pediatricians and instead of take care by themselp rather than for consultation.
• However, when the problem of stealing occurs in a child, his mother and father try to solve it at home on their own, rather than bringing them to the Pediatrician for consultation.
• There is a reason.
• Most of the behaviors that children take on other people’s possessions without permission are not malicious.
• Proper handling of such stealing behavior usually does not have serious consequences.
• As the old saying, “A needle thief becomes a cow thief”, we must never condone the act of having someone’s petty, insignificant, and small things without the owner’s permission.
• It is very important to teach your children that you must “live honestly”.
• However, the meaning of “honesty” has a relative meaning, and many children and adolescents today are confused about honesty.
• In any country, anywhere, in any age, regardless of age or gender, regardless of age or gender, honesty is very important in life and has an important value in terms of moral ethics.
• But for some people, for people in some countries, honesty doesn’t seem to be so important in their lives. In addition, the value of honesty may be slightly different depending on the society, the era, each family, and each individual.

 

The cause of theft

• Steal for various reasons.
• However, there are many times when the cause is not known for certain.
• The reason or cause of stealing will be described in detail below.

 

Children and adolescents without the concept of ownership can steal from others (the concept of non-ownership).

 

• Most of the infants before the age of 6 years old are unaware of the true meaning of “stealing” and rarely have the notion of “property”.
• It is bad to have someone else’s possessions without permission, and the notion of not doing so is certainly not for infants of that age.
• In addition, it is common to be virtually unaware of the consequences that if someone else has something as their own without permission, as a result, the owner who owns it will no longer have it.
• However, the above-described notion of ownership is evident in the majority of 6-years-olds and older school-age children.
• Some children and adolescents who are not sure what the idea of ​​ownership is, are confused about the idea of ​​ownership, or have not learned what the idea of ​​ownership is, may take possession of others without the owner’s permission and may not know if the behavior is wrong.
• The thought of wanting to have something, the desire to collect something, occurs mostly in children and adolescents, and can also occur normally in adults.
• In a way, such thoughts or desires can be called human instincts.
• Some infants before the age of 4 years old take it to their home without permission from the owner, even though it is useless to them.
• In this way, he or she can have someone else’s things from the urge to just keep things that are useless to him or her without the owner’s permission, and he or she can have them without permission with the urge to have them even they are not essential to him or her.
• The urge to steal is suppressed because we have to value other people’s possessions or property, know what the concept of ownership is, and think that it is wrong to have other people’s possessions without permission.
• Children and adolescents who are not properly trained in this notion of ownership can use others’ things without permission and sometimes take them as their own.
• The measure of valuing other people’s possessions and how important ownership is, can vary depending on the rate of growth and development of children and adolescents and the degree of education.
• It is common in infants and young children to have one or two pieces of strings, paper clips, and stones that they will not use without their permission.
• In that case, it usually doesn’t matter.
• However, the problem is very different when a child has someone else’s pencil, the knife, or the paper without the owner’s permission.
• Family members living in confined spaces don’t have much privacy.
• It is common for parents, brothers, and sisters to share with each other whether it is mine or for other member to use the bedroom, the bed, the clothing, and toys.
• The idea of ​​ownership may not be evident in children living in such a home.
• Children living in such a home may take possessions of other members of the household without permission and use them as mine, not knowing that such behavior is wrong.
• Even children who grow up in families who can afford them economically and can store and use their own separately may not have a certain idea of ​​ownership and may use and take possession of other members of the household without permission.
• Even children and adolescents who have been educated and raised saying that “sharing is better” can be confused with the idea of ​​ownership.
• The idea of ​​ownership may not be evident to the children of parents who have been trained to take out the pocket money from the mother’s bag or dad’s pocket when spending the allowance.
• Some parents scour their children’s pockets without their permission while their children are away or sleeping, and confiscate everything in their pockets without the permission of their children if they find in their pockets what they taught their children not to have.
• Children who are raised by these family parents may feel that they have no place to keep their belongings safe.
• It is also possible to think that it is possible to take possessions of not only the family members but also other people’s possessions without permission, just as the parents did to them.
• Mom who searches dad’s pocket without dad’s permission, and dad who opens mom’s letter without mom’s permission, searches the wallets and pockets of mom, dad, or family members at will, and if they want, take it out and take it out without permission. You may be mistaken for doing it.
• In the lives of their parents, brothers and sisters, children who are raised without positive training on the idea of ​​ownership are able to take other things without permission and use others as they please, or steal things as needed.
• It is raised in a small family with no privacy, and if there is no idea of ​​ownership, it teaches about the idea of ​​ownership and teaches them not to look into, use, or take on others without permission.
• Also, their parents should show their children the exemplary behavior of neither using nor taking possession of their children without their permission.
• You should give your children a drawer or a box where they can put their belongings and use them.
• At the same time, it teaches that the property of others should be valued and not used or possessed. If children receive and send letters needlessly, admonish them not to send letters anymore, and let them tear up letters on their own if necessary.
• However, you shouldn’t even read your children’s letters.
• Teach children that they can own their own clothes, books, etc., and that they should be grateful that they can own them, and that they should cherish, manage, and use them.

 

 

2. It can be stolen to do a buy-in. (Theft of purchase).

Being bullied or teased by your friends or peers can create a feeling of alienation, and you can suffer quite a bit from that feeling of alienation.

Some of the suffering, especially school-age children, can give  them money, the candy, the ice cream, and etc. with friends and peers so that they are no longer teased or bullied.

You can steal something that can be used as a means to do a buy-in.

Rarely, there are school-age children who put a lot of money in their wallets to crush other children and give them money.

To do so, you can steal someone else’s money.

The majority of children who are bullied or teased and feel alienated are physically too larger or smaller than their peers, whether there is something wrong or deformed in their limbs or body, whether they are left-handed, stutter, or wear clothes that are too loose. It is common to be in and out of the school health room too often, physically or mentally, or elsewhere, whether it’s not, or too well dressed.

In general, children with physical, mental, or other defects may be bullied from their peers and feel alienated . Therefore they can buy something they like and sometimes they give money to them. It’s common to feel ashamed for doing things on your back.

In addition, it is common to hate excuses for the motive or method of doing the procurement and to tell parents or other people that fact.

For this reason, he or she  can steal something to do a buy-in.

The act of stealing to do the buy-in is not well-discovered, it is difficult to correct the act of stealing, and some of the school-age children who feel alienated may not even know what their flaws are.

The problem can be easily resolved by quickly finding the reasons and causes of being bullied and alienated and correcting them.

School-age or adolescent children who are overprotected by their parents are more prone to be bullying or bullied.

When you are alienated by a congenital deformity or any abnormality in your children body, you should seek advice from a regular pediatrician when your parents cannot correct the abnormality in your children body.

If you can’t fix any flaws in your child’s body, he can make use of his special skills and materials such as music, painting, swimming, and games, and encourage him to grow up with healthy sound self-esteem and confidence.

For this reason, it is imperative to keep in close contact with parents of other school-age and adolescent children and to treat their children’s friends with kindness.

3. The children can steal from the desire to own. (Stealing the desire to own)

The cildren can steal because they want to own it.

For this reason, any adults or the men and the women of all ages, steal from others.

Toddlers with many toys can get an urge to have them after seeing unusual toys that other toddlers have and steal them.

Most school-age children over 6 years old of age and adolescents who have a strong sense of ownership, knowing that stealing is bad and that stealing can be punished will not steal even if they have the urge to have something else.

Also, most of the school-age or adolescent children of this age usually do not know that when they have the urge to have other things without permission, they restrict possessive desires according to their maturity and know that they cannot have everything.

If parents explain that their children have to tell them why they can not it even they  want to have or that you can’t buy it because you don’t have money or for other reasons, they understand why they cannot have it depending on their maturity.

When you want to have something you can’t have, it’s a good idea to clearly explain why you can’t have it and give it something else instead.

If it is judged that what he wants to have is a safety problem, explaining that the reason he cannot have it is a safety problem, and he can see the reason why he cannot have it.

Give them pocket allowances  based on their age and maturity, and give them weekly pocket allowances as much as their peers and friends receive from their parents, and they won’t steal.

4. It can be stolen to revenge. (Stealing revenge)

When the relationship between parents and children is not good, some children can steal something to retaliate against their parents.

A child who doesn’t really love him or who thinks parente only loves another brother can steal something to revenge on his parents.

If parents are too conscious and authoritative, and they train their children in the hope that they will behave maturely like mature adults, children can rebel against them and steal something.

When parents train their children to lead their children on the right track, they over-supervise themselves and dominate themselves, make possessive love as if parents had them, meddle in every one of their actions, or give too little allowance. Children who over-manage and interfere with spending the allowances already given, or who do not understand that each child has a need for independence depending on their growth maturity, and think that they always keep themselves tightly tied to their parents, repay their parents. Children can steal someone else’s to do it.

Young children are independent human beings, and they do not understand that they have the right to grow up and become independent from their parents, and that they must grow up and develop joyfully, and if perents don’t adequately help Children meet their need for independence according to their age and maturity, they can be stolen in revenge.

Children who grow up with possessive love from their parents, children who grow up with conditional love, and children who grow up with false love may steal pencils and keychains that are neither necessary nor important to them, and sometimes they can steal something of value.

Parents should also help their children grow up with sound confidence knowing that they are members of the family, they also are independent individuals, and have the right to receive unconditional love.

If parents raise their children too authoritatively, or raise them because they love them conditionally, or raise not them fairly, and if parents dominate and raise their children like a boss, parents should apologize to their children, increasing privileges and increasing allowances according to maturity. .

It teaches by emphasizing that it is bad to have even the most trivial things without the permission of the owner, and that there is no right to have other things without permission. It is taught that it is a sin to have something bad and others’ things without permission.

If he or she  has other people’s possessions without permission, one parent or two parents sternly and kindly discipline in a quiet place at an appropriate time that the act of having what the other person has without permission is not right, bad, and unacceptable behavior.

When adults are at work, they can steal something to make up for the level of salary other employees receive when they think that their employer does not treat them fairly than other employees, or when they think that their pay is less than that of other employees.

5. Adolescent children steal can be divided into four categories

The stealing behavior of adolescent children can be divided into four categories.

 ① They can accidentally steal someone else’s. They didn’t plan to have someone else’s possessions, but they could have it without the owner’s permission because they were thinking about what they owned by chance. In other words, after seeing someone else’s, it is a case of stealing.

 ② They can steal something to show that they are a mature man.

 ③ It can be stolen for comfort.  When a loved one dies or separates from

    him,  something can be stolen as a means of supplementing the loved one.

 ④ They can steal something intentionally.

They can steal by themself after They have a plan to steal in advance, or They can steal after making a plan to steal with some peers.

In this case, it is common to plan and steal carefully so as not to be detected.

In general, children of poor families, children raised for possessive love, children of parents who express their anger through passive aggressive behavior, and children who grow up overprotected, steal in this way.

Children who are raised with seductive love from mothers or nurtured by authoritative fathers may be more likely to steal.

The majority of adolescent children who engage in stealing are mentally quite anxious, impulsive, immature, and complaining.

There are also school-age and adolescent children who steal something by the control of the elderly.

Stealing something from adolescents who have joined the gang for fear of retribution if they don’t steal can have disastrous consequences.

“It is your fault to be caught stealing. For that reason, it’s common to be persuaded to steal so that you won’t be caught” and praised by gang members who successfully steal something.

In this case, most of the stolen items could be of value.

Most of the children who join the gang do not usually grow up in stable homes.

Most of these people often go to prison and continue to steal on their own even after they reach adulthood, or as a member of a gang and continue to steal.

Adolescent children who use drugs can steal something to buy drugs.

Since marijuana and amphetamines are relatively cheap, it is common to get money to buy drugs by stealing small items from a whole store.

However, in order to purchase expensive drugs such as heroin, it is common to steal valuables by robbing or transpassing.

6. It can be stolen by pilfer. (Stole the stealing)

School-age or adolescent children who express their anger as passive aggressive behaviors can steal as a means of anger.

Because of its tyrannism, adolescent children can steal anything.

Two or more teenage girls can steal together.

Sometimes you can do something and steal it only once or twice.

Some adolescent girls steal during menstruation just before menstruation.

This kind of stealing is more common among adolescent girls.

It is caused by symptoms of menstrual abnormalities and must be handled well.

The act of successfully stealing something from a store, once or twice, is not called a steal.

 

42. Stealing in children and adolescents(2)……..327

(((((((((((How to tackle children’s stealing behavior

Teach honesty.

It must be said strictly that if a young child has something of others without the permission of the owner,

it is wrong to have something of others without permission, and that such an act is a bad act and an act that can no longer be tolerated.

When they grow up, it is a sin to steal someone else’s, and according to their degree, they sternly and firmly discipline them to go to prison.

It is taught that stealing is bad when there is an incident on TV shows, at home, or in society.

Emphasizing the importance of doing all business relationships in everyday life on an equitable and honest basis, it is important to teach what honesty is, and to review frequently whether parents themselves acted honestly in front of young children.

 

Most of the infants and toddlers who have had other people’s things without permission are also grown up and can become honest adults.

 

They also tell us that they can be sincere and good social leaders.

However, some of the children and adolescents who have the things of others without permission when they are young emphasize that they can continue to have the things of others without permission even when they grow up and become adults.

parents  says that honesty is a treasure and that living honestly is very important.

The relationship between parents and their parents in their daily lives is completely honest and fair.

Reconsider whether parents have written false statements to their children’s teachers, or whether even minor infidelities have been done in front of younger children.

 

Parents reconsider whether they have cheated on having something else or lied as a joke in front of their children.

It teaches the meaning of ownership, and teaches in everyday life to make sure that this is mine and that is yours.

No matter how small a child belongs, a parent should not have or use it without his permission.

They give them enough pocket money and teach them to spend them properly.

If you unexpectedly have to spend more pocket money, teach your children that you can spend more pocket money.

Also, the promise must be fulfilled.

The pocket money you have already given should not be taken away by punishment. Don’t let this happen again to children who have had possessions of others without permission in the past.

Make sure to keep your money so that they can’t easily see it in the house.

 

To test your child’s honesty, it is not a wise way to raise a child by putting money in a place where the child can easily see it, and then stealing it or testing it.

Review what was left around home, school, and living so that children can have it without permission.

Seeing a child who owns someone else’s without permission, no matter how trivial, can lead to embarrassment and a quick reminder that my child could go to jail.

It’s important to prevent stealing, but it’s also important to teach honesty and correct wrongdoings on a regular basis.

The stolen children should not be overreacted, punished, condone, and punished appropriately.

Teach about ownership.

Infants aged 2 to 3 are self-centered to the last and may misunderstand everything around them as if they were mine.

When someone approaches them, they shout that it’s mine and they may mistake them for everything they want to have.

This is also normal.

Some of the 2 to 3 year olds can hold candy in their hands without the owner’s permission and stand in front of someone else’s store cashier, and they can put toys in their pockets that haven’t been bought without paying any money.

They point to everyone and say they will just have it.

To a child like this, “It’s not yours. You can see it, but neither touch nor have it.” Compliment them if they comply with their parents’ words and do not touch them or have them.

When you have a lot of things you want to have, you can choose only one or two of them depending on your maturity level, and you can buy them with your own pocket money, and you must teach them to learn not to have them by controlling their desires. In other words, if you have someone else’s other than yours without permission, take the child to a quiet place and, when you are alone, tell the child that it is not yours and should not be taken without permission.

And, depending on the situation, you can order it to be delivered to the owner. For school-aged children over the age of 6, it must be clearly stated that possessions without the owner’s permission are stolen, and possession of others without permission is an act of stealing. (Even here, you shouldn’t actually use the word steal.)

If something you have without permission is found in your child’s pocket or bag, it is best not to ask as much as possible about the process of acquiring it, such as where and how it was acquired.

Just cut it off as wrong to have it without the owner’s permission, speak seriously and quietly, and punish him for his actions. ‘

Of course, he returns the item to the owner. Don’t blame the child, don’t be hostile, don’t despise him. Don’t even give the child the impression of being a bad child.

But calmly, he simply says that the actions he took are bad.

Even what you want to buy is taught based on honesty.

It teaches that almost everything in the house is bought for money.

Teach what it means to receive a gift.

When you buy something in a store, it really shows that you pay for it.

Depending on their maturity, children are given pocket money and taught them to buy what they need with the pocket money. Teach about the value of things. Teach them to save money to buy gifts.

 

Teach the meaning of possession.

They walk around the house, look at objects, and teach them about ownership.

Teach them that some of the objects in the house are their children and some are not theirs.

Teach that this is mom and that is dad and this is yours and that you can label the child’s. It teaches that you can use yours without the permission of others, and that you don’t see, have, or use yours without the permission of mom or dad.

Teach them to use and lend things, for example.

Teach your child how to apologize for the stealing.

Infants, school-age children, adolescents, and some of the adults do not know how to ask for forgiveness for wrongdoing.

Teach them how to ask for forgiveness after doing something wrong.

When parents have the opportunity to tell others to forgive for something they have done wrong, they can teach the child how to ask for forgiveness as a model behavior.

If I take something of someone else without permission, “you have to give it back to the owner”, teach them to ask for forgiveness, and if necessary, use yor allowance to pay for the stolen property.

When you have the urge to have something, teach them how to control it.

If you point to something at the store’s cash register and ask for something to buy, teach the child to see it, but not to touch it, because it is not yours.

Compliment it if you calmly endure it without touching it.

Sometimes you can allow one or two of them to be bought for your pocket money.

When he has something without his permission, he can ask the child directly what he would like him to do, and sometimes you can suggest what he would do if he did this.

If you have something of someone else’s without permission, you can go to the place you have and meet the owner of the item.

Ask the owner of the item to forgive even if he doesn’t say anything.

If your children have something that is not theirs without permission, ask what you think if someone else has yours without permission, and educate them not to have other people’s things without permission.

Teach them to apologize for wrongdoing and return it to the owner if they own someone else’s without permission.

It should be noted that young children may not know the meaning of “apple,” “wrong,” “sorry,” and so on, and apologizing with such words cannot always be desired.

However, you teaches that they must say sorry if they do something wrong.

Teach them that when they want to have something other than their own, they can ask if they can have it and then ask if they can have it.

Ask mom, dad or other people if they can have it, and teach them that if they can have it. He admonished that you should never take other people’s without permission. Compliment and reward appropriate for acting honestly.

It’s important to correct behaviors that are dishonest, but training them to be honest in the future is also very important.

The most important thing is to teach them to be honest.

If you look at the candy with your own eyes and don’t touch it at someone else’s store without permission, you praises the child for being very good.

If there is an example of a child doing honest behavior on TV, in the newspaper, or at home, think about honest behavior with your child and teach them about honesty.

If you have children who have household members’ money or items without permission, keep your money and so on so that they will not be tempted.

If they act honestly for a long time and show honesty all the time, praise them for doing so.

Always supervise what your children steal and what they do wrong.

Supervise your children while they are growing up so they keep training to avoid stealing anything.

They can also steal something by not being able to overcome the pressure of your peers. To prevent this, they should always be observed and supervised.

It is also a good way to raise children by working with the parents of other children and taking turns supervising them.

When parents leave home and go to work before their children ride the school bus to school, have a neighbor or someone observe them. One parent can take turns supervising children and children in the neighborhood in the morning and the other in the evening.

When stealing something, you can consult with the parents of the stolen children to educate them not to do it.

Let them play together and play with them if they no longer steal, and prevent them from playing together for at least a few weeks if they steal something else together.

And when playing together, parents take turns observing and supervising them.

In many ways, it is not good for school-age children to come home after school and let their school-age children play at home alone.

Allowing young school-age children to play alone is child abuse, depending on age and country to country.

Sometimes, before the parents return home from work, the babysitter who cares for the school-age child who comes home from school first makes the phone call to the mother and makes it clear that the mother checks you over the phone because she loves you. After arriving home from school, prepare a schedule of things to do and a timetable for your school-age child.

In an emergency, write down phone numbers where you can reach parents, and teach them to call the babysitter taking care of your child in case of an emergency.

Set a time for homework, a snack, and a time to watch TV, and after mom and dad return home, do it as it is.

Parents can take turns supervising them by creating healthy after-school programs with friends living in the neighborhood.

Like the above, love your little ones so they don’t steal.

Teach about the negative consequences of stealing.

It is not a good idea to cure the stolen behavior by yelling and criticizing the child who owns anything other than the owner’s permission, and prolonging educational admonition.

Nevertheless, it must be said in a simple, severe and quiet manner that it is wrong and a serious matter to have someone else’s without permission.

When school-age children take possession of other people’s possessions without permission, they will be punished by doing more chores than usual, making money by delivering newspapers, etc., and rewarding the stolen items with the earned money. Then, if necessary, return the item and have the owner apologize for the wrongdoing. Give punishment to common sense.

If a small infant eats cookies without permission, they are not given for 2 to 3 days, and for older preschool children 5-6 years old, do not give them for 1 week.

If your child bring a toy from a friend without permission, you can buy it with your own money or give it your own.

If you have another child’s money at school, clean the bowl you ate at home and repay it with his pocket money.

Consider taking away the rights you have granted as needed for some time.

If you don’t know what to do, ask your regular pediatrician or get help from a school counselor.

How important it is to teach your children honesty while thinking that my children grow up as adults and are sitting in prison cells for stealing from others!

Parents who raise their children through regular pediatric  health check-ups, as well as medical professionals in the pediatric clinic, believe that they have a responsibility to guide children and adolescents to grow up healthy and true, and to train children to avoid stealing. Sources and references

)))))))))))))))))))))

 

How to tackle children’s stealing behavior

 

• Teach honesty.
• It must be said strictly that if a young child has something of others without the permission of the owner, it is wrong to have something of others without permission, and that such an act is a bad act and an act that can no longer be tolerated.
  When they grow up, it is a sin to steal someone else’s, and according to their degree, they sternly and firmly discipline them to go to prison.

 

• It is taught that stealing is bad when there is an incident on TV shows, at home, or in society.

 

• Emphasizing the importance of doing all business relationships in everyday life on an equitable and honest basis, it is important to teach what honesty is, and to review frequently whether parents themselves acted honestly in front of young children.

 

• Most of the infants and toddlers who have had other people’s things without permission are also grown up and can become honest adults.

 

• They also tell us that they can be sincere and good social leaders.

 

• However, some of the children and adolescents who have the things of others without permission when they are young emphasize that they can continue to have the things of others without permission even when they grow up and become adults.

 

• Honesty is a treasure and that living honestly is very important.

 

• The relationship between parents and their parents in their daily lives is completely honest and fair.

 

• Reconsider whether parents have written false statements to their children’s teachers, or whether even minor infidelities have been done in front of younger children.

 

• Parents reconsider whether they have cheated on having something else or lied as a joke in front of their children.

 

• It teaches the meaning of ownership, and teaches in everyday life to make sure that this is mine and that is yours.

 

• No matter how small a child belongs, a parent should not have or use it without his permission.

 

• They give them enough pocket allowance and teach them to spend them properly.

 

• If your children unexpectedly have to spend more pocket allowance, teach your children how to spend more pocket allowance.
• Also, the promise must be fulfilled.

 

• The pocket allowance you have already given should not be taken away by punishment.

 

• Don’t let this happen again to children who have had possessions of others without permission in the past.
• Make sure to keep your money so that they can’t easily see it in the house.
• To test your child’s honesty, it is not a wise way to raise a child by putting money in a place where the child can easily see it, and then stealing it or testing it.
• Review what was left around home, school, and living so that children can have it without permission.
• Seeing a child who owns someone else’s without permission, no matter how trivial, can lead to embarrassment and a quick reminder that he could go to jail.
• It’s important to prevent stealing, but it’s also important to teach honesty and correct wrongdoings on a regular basis.
• The stolen children should not be overreacted, punished, condone, and punished appropriately.

 

Teach about ownership.

Infants aged 2 to 3 yesaers old are self-centered to the last and may misunderstand everything around them as if they own.

When someone approaches them, they shout that it’s mine and they may mistake them for everything they want to have.

This is also normal.

Some of the 2 to 3 years old can hold candy in their hands without the owner’s permission and stand in front of someone else’s store cashier, and they can put toys in their pockets that haven’t been bought without paying any money.

They point to everyone and say they will just have it.

To a child like this, “It’s not yours.

You can see it, but neither touch nor have it.”

Compliment them if they conform to their parents’ words and do not touch or hold them.

 

When you have a lot of things you want to have, you can choose only one or two of them depending on your maturity level, and you can buy them with your own pocket allowance, and you must teach them to learn not to have them by controlling their desires.

 

In other words, if you have someone else’s other than yours without permission, take the child to a quiet place and, when you are alone, tell the child that it is not yours and should not be taken without permission.

 

And, depending on the situation, you can order it to be delivered to the owner.

For school-aged children over the age of 6 years old , it must be clearly stated that possessions without the owner’s permission are stolen, and possession of others without permission is an act of stealing. (Even here, you shouldn’t actually use the word steal.)

 

If something you have without permission is found in your child’s pocket or bag, it is best not to ask as much as possible about the process of acquiring it, such as where and how it was acquired.

 

Just cut it off as wrong to have it without the owner’s permission, speak seriously and quietly, and punish him for his actions. Of course, he returns the item to the owner.

 

Don’t blame the child, don’t be hostile, don’t despise him.

Don’t even give the child the impression of being a bad child.

But calmly, he simply says that the actions he took are bad.

Even what you want to buy is taught based on honesty.

It teaches that almost everything in the house is bought for money.

 

Teach what it means to receive a gift.

When you buy something in a store, it really shows that you pay for it.

Depending on their maturity, children are given pocket allowance and taught them to buy what they need with the pocket money, and if they need more pocket money, they can work to earn money and buy what they need with the money.

Teach about the value of things.

Teach them to save money to buy gifts.

 

Teach the meaning of possession.

They walk around the house, look at objects, and teach them about ownership.

Teach them that some of the objects in the house are their children and some are not theirs.

Teach that this is mom’s and that is dad’s and this is yours and that you can label the child’s.

It teaches that you can use yours without the permission of others, and that you don’t see, have, or use yours without the permission of mom or dad.

Teach them to use and lend things, for example.

 

Teach your child how to apologize for the stealing.

Infants, post-infancy school-age children, adolescents, and some of the adults do not know how to ask for forgiveness for wrongdoing.

Teach them how to ask for forgiveness after doing something wrong.

 When parents have the opportunity to tell others to forgive for something they have done wrong, they can teach the child how to ask for forgiveness as a model behavior.

If you take something of someone else without permission, you give it back to the owner, teach them to ask for forgiveness, and if necessary, use his or her allowance to pay for the stolen property.

When he or she has the urge to have something, teach him or her how to control it.

If your child points to something at the store’s cash register and ask for a purchase, teach the child to see it, but not to touch it, because it is not his.

Compliment it if you calmly endure it without touching it.

Sometimes you can allow one or two of them to be bought for your pocket money.

When your child has something without parent’s permission, parents can ask the child directly what he would like him to do, and sometimes he can suggest what he would do if he did this.

If you have something of someone else’s without permission, you can go to the place he or she meet the owner of the item.

Ask the owner of the item to forgive even if he doesn’t say anything.

If your children have something that is not theirs without permission, ask what he or she  thinks if someone else has yours without your permission, and educate them not to have other people’s things without permission.

Teach them to apologize for wrongdoing and return it to the owner if they own someone else’s without permission.

It should be noted that young children may not know the meaning of “apologize,” “wrong,” “sorry,” and so on, and apologizing with such words cannot always be desired.

However, you teache that he or she must say sorry if he or she do something wrong.

You teach them that when they want to have something other than their own, they can ask if they can have it.

Ask mom, dad or other people if they can have it, and teach them that if they can have it.

He admonished that they never take other people’s without permission.

Compliment and reward appropriate for acting honestly.

While it is important to correct behavior that is not honest, it is also very important to train them to be honest in the future.

The most important thing is to teach them to be honest.

If you look at the candy with your own eyes but don’t touch it at someone else’s store without permission, parents praise them for being very good.

If there is an example of a child doing honest behavior on TV, in the newspaper, or at home, parents think about it and teach it about honesty with your child.

If you have children who have household members’ money or items without permission, keep your money and  so that he or she  will not be tempted.

If a child  acts honestly for a long time and show honesty all the time, praise them for doing so.

Always supervise what your children steal and what they do wrong.

Supervise your children while they are growing up so they are trained to not keep things from stealing.

 He or she can steal something by not being able to overcome the pressure of your peers.

To prevent this, they should always be observed and supervised.

It is also a good way to raise children by working with the parents of other children and taking turns supervising them.

When parents leave home and go to work before their children ride the school bus to school, have a neighbor or someone observe them.

One parent can take turns supervising children and children in the neighborhood in the morning and the other in the evening. When stealing something, you can talk to the parents of the children who stole with and educate them not to do it.

Let them play together if they no longer steal, and prevent them from playing together for at least a few weeks until they do not steal something else together.

And when playing together, parents take turns observing and supervising them.

In many ways, it is not good for school-age children to come home after school and let their school-age children play at home alone.

Allowing young school-age children to play alone is child abuse, depending on age and country to country.

Sometimes, before the parents return home from work, the babysitter who cares for the school-age child who comes home from school first makes the phone call to the mother and makes it clear that the mother checks the children  over the phone because she loves them.

After arriving home from school, prepare a schedule of things to do and a timetable for your school-age child. In an emergency, write down phone numbers where children can reach parents, and teach them to call the babysitter taking care of your child in case of an emergency.

Set a time for homework, a snack, and a time to watch TV, and after mom and dad return home, do it as it is.

Parents can take turns supervising them by creating sound after-school programs with friends living in the neighborhood.

Like the above, love your little ones so they don’t steal.

Teach about the negative consequences of stealing.

It is not a good idea to cure the stolen behavior by yelling and criticizing the child who owns anything other than the owner’s permission, and prolonging educational admonition.

Nevertheless, it must be said in a simple, severe and quiet manner that it is wrong and a serious matter to have something else without permission.

When school-age children take possession of other people’s possessions without permission, they will be punished by doing more chores than usual, making money by delivering newspapers, etc., and rewarding the stolen items with the earned money.

Then, if necessary, return the item and have apologized to owner for the wrongdoing.

Give punishment to common sense.

If a small infant eats cookies without permission, cookies are not given for 2 to 3 days, and for larger infants 5-6 years old, do not give them for 1 week. If you bring a toy from a friend without permission, you can buy it with his own money or give it  owner.

If you have another child’s money at school, clean the bowl he ate at home and repay it with his pocket money.

Consider taking away the rights you have granted as needed for some time.

If you don’t know what to do, ask your regular pediatriacian or  get help from a school counselor.

How important it is to teach your children honesty while thinking that your children grow up as adults and are sitting in prison cells for stealing from others!

Parents who raise their children through regular child and adolescent health check-ups, as well as medical professionals in the pediatric office, believe that they have a responsibility to guide children and adolescents to grow up healthy and trust, and to train them to avoid stealing anything.

 

42. Pardon forgiveness…………310

Forgiveness is a lubricant that facilitates interpersonal relationships in human society.

There is no one perfect person in our human society.

Anyone can do wrong sometimes.

We forgive us, they forgive you, and we live every day.

In order to abandon the old, replace the new, and move forward, the process of forgiveness and forgiveness is essential for our humans.

“Forgive me because I’ve done something wrong” is one of the most words to say in a relationship.

Forgiveness can be defined as follows.

 ① Accepting generously and not punishing

 ② Tolerate and not punish

 ③ Tolerate and not rebuke

 ④ It is a disengaging action with the power to relieve anger, heal wounds, and reconcile and energize fights ( from Leo F. Buscaglia, Loving each other).

True  forgiveness is one of the most noble actions in human society.

The mistakes that have already been made in the past cannot be completely corrected now.

Nevertheless, do you keep holding on to the mistakes of the past until now?

Empty the hatred, resentment, and worries that you have deep in your heart.

Send it far and forget it.

Neither you nor me can judge other people’s wrongdoings with certainty, nor can you judge others’ wrongdoings.

You shouldn’t even take revenge on what you did wrong.

Leave the judgment of wrongs to God only.

Please forgive me.

Then you will be comfortable and free.

There will be no anguish and pain.

However, it is not easy to forgive.

Not all of us are perfect.

We can all do wrong.

However, it is difficult to forgive someone who keeps making mistakes without correcting them.

The price of not forgiving is sometimes substantial.

Sometimes it is far more than the price of forgiveness.

Hating without forgiveness, resentment, and retaliation can lead to self-destructive and dead ends.

The process of forgiving and receiving forgiveness in human relationships requires compassion, and it requires all strength.

Only then will this feeling of hatred be alleviated and peace and stability in the mind will be created.

Physical and psychological wounds sustained by abuse, abandonment, and indifference are healed.

The resentment is reconciled, the breakdown reunites, and the energy rises.

Anger subside or disappear.

The pain disappears.

Buddhism;s generality  kindness, compassion, love are based on forgiveness, and Jesus’ unconditional love is based on the power of forgiveness.

“Forgive us our sins as we have forgiven those who have sinned against us” is the Bible in Matthew 6:9–13.

“At that time Peter came and said, Lord, how many times will I forgive my brother  if he sins? Will I do it up to seven times? Jesus said to him, “I tell you, not only seven times, but also seventy times, seventy times.” .

In 2 Chronicles 30:18, Job 7:21, Isaiah 55:7, and Joel 3:12 there are Bible words about forgiveness.

These words of the Bible are absolutely necessary lessons to have a smooth interpersonal relationship in our daily life.

There is a lesson I printed out to my family at a family gathering in my home on Thanksgiving Day.

Think of it as a lesson that can make our relationship beautiful, and share it with us.

These are the words we should use a lot in order to establish a smooth interpersonal relationship during our lives.

First, “Please forgive me because I was wrong.” (I was wrong, please forgive me)

Second, “You did a great job.” (You did good job)

Thirdly, “Please tell us your opinion.” (What is your opinion)

Fourth, “Shall I help you.” (Can I help)

Fifth, “Thank you.”

Sixth, “You”

Seventh, “I”

(Author unknown)

Not all of us are perfect, and anyone can err.

We live with our parents, siblings, relatives, friends, neighbors, and teachers, without knowing to everyone in the world.

And I apologize and live with forgiveness.

This is why we pray in front of God, “We are sinners.”

Even between couples, without knowing, they make mistakes with each other, pray for forgiveness and receive forgiveness.

Parents must forgive their children, and children must forgive their parents.

Even so, the Soviet Union and the United States, which had been in the Cold War for decades, were forgiven and forgiven each other.

Vietnam and the United States, Japan and Korea also prayed for forgiveness, forgived and forgiven each other.

There are many countries in this world that pray for forgiveness, be forgiven, and have friendly relations, and they forgive and live forgiving for the mistakes that have occurred between us humans.

Forgiving the murderer who murdered her husband, forgiving the murderer of her beloved child, and a child who had been abandoned because there was no place to eat and wear, grew up under a parent other than his own parents, became an adult, and succeeded, seeking forgiveness from each other to seek forgiveness.

What a beautiful forgiveness.

People and couples who live unforgivable and guilty can sometimes be very heartbreaking.

The feeling of guilt cannot always be eliminated just by being forgiven.

However, when the sense of guilt that they had through forgiveness is emptied from the heart, the bonding of love between the couple becomes even stronger.

The next story is about Aesop about forgiveness and sympathy.

One day, a lion was sleeping quietly in the mountain hill, snores,  drooling enough to leave the mountain stream in the sun lit the forest.

A tiny mouse stepped  the feet of the lion, the king of animals.

The sleeping lion suddenly woke up.

And showed white teeth.

The mouse was trembling in front of the lion.

As the great lion trembled and tried to eat the crying  the mouse

“Lion king . Please save me. Please forgive me just once”.

The mouse  begged with tears.

“Someday I will also help you, Lion, the king of animals.”

The nice and magnificent lion listened to the little mouse and said, “How can a little mouse cub like you help me?” The Lion laughed and laughed. In fact, the lion was compassionate and loved the little beast very much. I will let the mouse go.

Shortly thereafter, the lion got caught in a net struck by someone living in the town. The lion pulled and pulled the net to escape from the contaminated net and tried to do his best, but the rope of the net was so strong  that there was no way to get out of the net.

The lion roared so loudly in the mountainand. The lion’s scream could move so that the vegetation of the mountain could be shaken.

The little mouse heard the lion crying sorrowfully and ran to the place immediately.

“My benefactor, lion. You are still there. I will help you. I will peck the rope and help the lion get out”. The mouse is small, but pecked the rope with a sharp tooth.

To the lion who escaped the net, “Lion!

He laughed at me for being small.

No matter how small I was, I thought there was nothing I could do for the Lion. See it. As a lion forgave me and pity me to save your precious life, I now repay the grace.”

This is a beautiful article by Aesop about the sympathy and forgiveness that occurred between the animal king and a little mouse.

You need to learn to forgive a couple for wrong words and actions.

Especially when you are truly regretful of your wrong words and actions, you should forgive them.

Regret for one’s fault is evidence that your conscience is alive.

We must be compassionate and forgive.

We always do wrong and sin.

We must always learn to forgive others, just like living with forgiveness.

Incorrect words and actions must be forgiven through dialogue and sympathy.

If a couple fights or is angry with wrong words and wrong actions, you should not hurt or anger the other person.

They express their anger in a passive aggressive way, torment the other person, separate the couple, and even divorce.

You have to learn to forgive through conversation.

Those who do not forgive or live without forgiveness will live with guilt.

While married couples make true love without conditions through eye contact love and physical contact love, the couple should live while forgiving and receiving forgiveness.

While raising children, it is wonderful for proper forgiveness and teaches children how to forgive others’ mistakes.

 

43. Principles of confidential care for patients………………..303

 

The next question is, “How would you make diagnosis and treat febrile convulsions, status febrile convulsions if he is your child?

This is an example of a question-and-answer on Internet pediatric and adolescent health counseling during “Ask and answer on any child care question thru Internet done by myself about 10 years ago”.

 

Q&A. “How would you make diagnosis and treat febrile convulsions, status febrile convulsions if he is your child?

 

1. Subject: 1 hour 30 minutes febrile convulsions.

 

Age: 28 months, Gender: Male

 

Past medical history:

• 1 time at age  7 months fever due to swollen throat,
• 2 times a day fever before the first birhth day,
• 1 time at age 16 months, and most of them did wake up by himself.  He was brought to the emergency room in all cases.
• There were no significant sequelae.

 

Family history:

• Dad said that he had twice febrile convulsion at the first 100 days old to age 6 years old
•  and his mother also had one febrile convulsion as a child.

 

Examination findings

febrile convulsion, no abnormal EEG finding.

 

However, the convulsions occurred in the age 27 months old was different from usual, and I am quit worry a lot as a mother.

 

As one time, his throat was swollen and red and he had a fever.

 

Watching the child with a fever and this time I started looking at the clock.

After bubbling in his mouth and unconsciousness , difficulty breathing for 5 minutes, he woke up after showing a change as if crying while making a groaning sound. And them the convulsions lasted more than an hour.

 

His doctor seemed to regard the convulsions as a post convulsions status. The the convulsions lasted for 5 minutes, but can his post convulsions status last more than 1 hour ?

When he had arriveed at the emergency room after 20 minutes of convulsion by the ambulance.

The nurses there said that the child was awake and told us not to worry, but after however that the convulsion persisted, they called the doctor in charge and administered suppositories of sedatives three times as first aid.

 

Still, the child did not wake up and did have the convulsions (holding fists tight, two legs stiff, eyes closed, moaning remain) persists. After an hour and a half had passed, he repeated to sleep in pain and crying.

 

The doctor gave the bad sedative three times and then he said your child had  post-convulsion status. What is  post-convulsion status and how can it be treated? I am curious because there is no detailed explanation of the post-convulsion status anywhere.

He couldn’t walk after a convulsion as if a drunk person was paralyzed, as if he was out of balance and bumped and fell. Isn’t this Todd paralysis that may appears after febrile convulsion?

The emergency room doctor who has watched the convulsion looked inexperienced and is unreliable.

Pediatric neurologists don’t seem to believe that he has febrile convulsion lasting for

the 1 hour and 30 minute. They thought he has simple febrile seizures. They  think

it may be because there is no standard treatment method right now.

The result of the EEG test is normal and at the moment, he can walk well and not showing any after effects.

It is recommended to use valium suppositories when convulsing only for possible recurrenceof febrile convulsion.

As a mother with poor medical knowledge, I write down the frustration of neither trusting nor trusting doctors.

 

How would you judge and deal with if he is your child?

 

Please give me a clear answer.

 

A worried mother.

 

1. To dear worried mother

 

Hello. Thank you for asking. And thank you for giving me detailed information on medical history and symptoms.

 

You did well as if in the morning, when in the medical rounding for the pediatric ward at a university hospital, one of interns reported to the head professor the progress of the patient’s illness who he was responsible for and treated over the past day.

 

Thank you.

 

I understand to some extent you who has been worried a lot during that time.

 

He has had diagnosis, treatment from many famous and good doctors, but I am afraid and worry that I will be able to give you a better answer.

 

Today I posted an article about febrile convulsions on my homepage”.

 

Please read it.

 

In my opinion, the your baby had a fever every time and  he had a convulsion, and again, when he had a convulsion and also he had a fever, and when he did not have a fever, there was no covulsion, I think  he had a febrile convulsion.

 

There are simple febrile convulsions and complex febrile convulsions.

 

By definition, if  a febrile convulsion is lasting for more than 20 minutes, it is called  a complex febrile convulsion. His convulsion lasted up to an hour and a half, and he did have a Todd’s paralysis, so I think he had a complex febrile convulsion.

 

In addition, seeing that he had convulsions for more than 30 minutes and did not regain consciousness in the meantime, it seems that his convulsion fell into a “status febrile convulsion”.

 

There are three types of  a febrile convulsive.

 

About 5% of febrile convulsive can develop status febrile convulsion.

 

He seem to have received adequate treatment.

 

However, from now on, it would be a good idea to consult with a pediatric neurologist about preventing febrile convulsion from occurring again.

 

There are pros and cons about its prevention, and there is no unique form way to prevent it.

 

If my child had a severe febrile convulsion, and  my child had a persistent febrile convulsion, I also received appropriate emergency treatment at the emergency medical center, hospitalized, and investigated to find what other abnormalities he had for convulsions. I will consult to other  physician or send my child to a pediatric neurologist for follow-up treatment and prevention as directed by him.

 

However, here is an interesting article I read, so please read it.

 

■ “Principles of confidential care”

 

I am here to serve your health and well-being.

 

I will always try to provide the most appropriate treatment and service for you.

 

I believe anyone needs a little help sometimes.

 

I can’t cure all the sicknesses.

 

I am your doctor, not your friend.

 

I will not lie to you.

 

I promote your health and provide information about your behavior problems.

 

I am not here to judge what is right and what is wrong.

 

Parents train their children to behave morally, socially and culturally. (Source-Dr. Ann Bruner)

 

His doctors look at the patient with “Principles of confidential care” in his mind.

 

When a child asks his mother for bread, she does not give a stone.

 

When a child asks his mother for fish, she does not give him a poisonous snake.

 

Our doctors always try to give their patients good bread and good fish.

 

And we stand to serve for the health and well-being of our patients.

 

Goodbye.

If you have more questions, please visit again. Thank you. Lee Sang-won .

 

 

Figure 275. Principles of confidential care. Source- Dr. Ann Bruner

 

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

 

47.Praise and jealousy…………………..309

The following is an example of a question-and-answer on the Internet pediatric and adolescent health counseling on “what to do with praise and jealousy”.

 

Q&A. Praise and jealous

 

1. A 5-year-old girl with a 6-year-old brother and she took off her milk bottle at age 15 months and toilel training was done at age 19 months.

 

However, she is so taller and stronger and healthier than other children for her age, and since she was young, she was really bigger’. ‘She’s bigger than her old brother.’ ‘She was like his older sister.’ Her old rother was handsome and  booty. I heard a lot about that from the others.

 

And this year (February), she had her younger brother, and all of a sudden, from a week ago, she just start to do pee anywhere (I change his clothes 7 to 8 times a day , even if  I can’t count a day), and even in sleeping. I gave soothing and somtimrs I gave punishment.

 

She went to pee, but it just came out first.

 

And she is too obsessed with her appearance. After going to kindergarten, she has been tying to touh her hair and applying anything.

 

Is it because of the younger brother or the urinary tract infection, other people say?

 

What should I do to help ?.

 

1. Dear Yerin

 

Hello. Thanks for asking. That’s a good question.

 

Diagnosing  and treatment can be done by the results of  obtaing information ont child’s age and sex, past and present patient’s and family medical history, symptom and signs and examination findings, and appropriate clinical tests

 

 Ideally, I will respond with the information provided.

 

I have a dog called Snauger Megii Lee.

 

Her name is Megii Lee.

 

I have so much to learn from Megii Lee.

 

The Megii Lee reacts so sensitively to the intonation and tone of my speech, the eye contact love and the physical contact love.

If I sat too close to my wife and I made phycal contact together her, Megii Lee slipped between the two of us.

 

There are so many times.

 

Megii Lee think me as Megii Lee’s lover.

 

If I don’t give  good eye contact love to Megii Lee, don’t pay attention to Meggii, and If Megii realize I and my wife may go somewhere with leaving Megii alone at home and Meggii may notice where we are going, Meggii  bited and threw her toys, and also  she made anger to us.

 

There is no end to the story on this Megii.

 

I would like to tell you another well-known old story.

 

This is a story about a Jeong-Seung, a farmer and two cows wre plowing waterfull rice fields during  the goverment turnoil disturvance period.

 

A farmer was plowing with two cows in the water muddy rice field.

 

Jeong-Seung saw a farmer going through a rice field with two cows while passing through a valley in order to flee from govermental turnoil disturvance.

 

Standing on the bank of the rice field, Jeong-Seung asked the farmer who was in the middle of a paddy field in the far distance, “Which of the two cows does the job better?”

 

The farmer, who was plowing the rice field, puts a plow and two cows in the middle of the rice field, walked out to the bank of the rice field, passes the water field, puts his mouth on the Jeong-Seung ‘s ear and says, “The cow on the right side is stronger and does better work.” Replied quietly.

 

The Jung-Seung asked, “you’are very busy guy, Why don’t shout out to answer. You do no need to come out to answer me this far?”

 

“It’s because I feel it is bad  when the cows hear the comparison that the cow on the left does a better job than the other does,” he replied.

 

Without knowingly, in front of other brothers or sistrs or others, we speak out loud about the wrongdoings of our children,

 

Often they praise and rebuke other children in front of them.

 

Perhaps I did a lot of that while raising my three children.

 

Children are very young, but they are keenly observing their parents’ gaze and every move they do.

 

They know well whether the praise and training that other brothers receive, or the punishment training, is fair or unfair.

 

They also appreciate the degree to which parents care for and love them.

 

As you said, you seem to have been quite jealous of your brother. Jealousy between such brothers and sisters can also be normal.

 

For some reason, it seems that she had anger against his parents.

 

This time, a new younger brother appears, so she thought he had completely broken his heart.

 

So, it seems that she expressed her anger through mixed jealousy.

 

It seems that one of the ways to express anger has been degenerative.

 

It seems to be pissing because of that.

 

It seems that she often changed clothes and the like to show her emotional desire to acknowledge herself and love him.

 

When I was in pediatric practice, parents brought 3-4 year old girls to my pediatric office to give the earring-piercing for the first time.

 

 

 

From the 2-3 year-old infancy, even infants are very interested in their physical beautiful condition and want to beautify their appearance.

 

When piercing the ear, she does not say a word that it hurts even if it hurts, and she does not shed tears and responds gently to piercing the ear.

 

Infants around the age of 5  years old  know to some extent that the men and the women have different.

 

The instinct to make one’s body image beautiful to others is more pronounced.

 

Please talk to the child a lot.

 

Mother and Dad give their children more unconditional love with eye contact love, physical contact love, focused attention love and care.

 

Find out what made her feel bad.

 

Never scold.

 

Also, have a medical examination at the  pediatric office and do a urine test to check for urinary tract infections or diabetes.

 

Please consult with the child’s mental problems.

Please give more love and more.

If you have more questions, please contact me again. Thank you. Lee Sang-won, MD.

 

The following is an example of a question and answer for online pediatric and adolescent health counseling on “big child enuresis”.

 

Q&A. Big child enuresis

 

1. Hello.

 

Our eldest child is a 7 years old girl. But she still wet on the blanket in the evening.

 

Her  body is also healthy and there are no other problems, but I am worried because she haven’t had toilet training yet while sleeping.

 

She almost never knows he has peeed, and she continues to sleep, or sometimes she takes his clothes off and sleeps again.

 

When she was 6 year old, I went to the urology clinic, and the doctor told me to wait a little longer.

 

However, I am worried that there will be a problem with the child’s personality because it has not been fixed even when she was 7 years old.

 

Please tell me what to do.

 

Thank you.

 

1. Sir

 

Thanks for asking. That’s a good question.

 

It is ideal to diagnose and treat the disease by reviewing the child’s past medical history, family medical history, physical examination findings, clinical lab test results and etc., but I wll answer  on the information provided

 

I’ll give you an answer.

 

Please refer to the following information.

 

”Nocturnal enuresis is when an infant turns at 5-6 years old and cannot completely have toilet training at night.

 

Enuresis is divided into organic enuresis and primary enuresis (functional enuresis).

 

Primary enuresisis defined if he or she does not have toilet trainng for at least 6 months while sleeping at night, and then start to wet bed again. Nocturiais is reffered night time bed wet

 

Nocturia caused by certain congenital organic diseases or acquired organic diseases in the urinary system, muscular system, nervous system, etc. is called organic enuresis.

 

Enuresis, which occurs without any abnormalities in the body, is called functional enuresis, physiological enuresis, or primary enuresis.

 

If there is nocturia, a physical examination and a urine test are given priority to find out if there are any organic abnormalities in the urinary system, muscular system, and spinal nervous system.

 

 

In general, if a diagnosis of functional enuresis is made by combining past medical history, family medical history, examination findings, and urine tests, other clinical lab tests.

 

Usuallt there is no need to test more than above for functional enuresis.

However, some doctors tell you to do ultrasound of the kidneys, ureters, and bladder.

 

In the case of functional enuresis, it is common for either parent to have a family history of having functional enuresis as a child.

 

Even if children with pneumonia do not want to cough, no matter how much children tried not to cough , chidren canot stop couph,  and she tried to stop  enuresis at night, she can not stop enuresis without appropriate treatment such as nature of cough.

 

Even if she try not to bedwet, she can not stop enuresis at night without treatment

 

You should not scold, embarrass, or punish a child for enuresis.

 

She urinates with nocturia, as if she should not be scolded and embarrassed the child not to cough because he has pneumonia.

 

Parents shouldn’t have to put more mental pressure on her becase to have enuresis.

 

If you make her embarrassing, scolding her, or punishing her, enuresis mabe become  worse, and the child feels a lot more mentally and hurts mentally.

 

Last night, when she did not wet in the morning, “you praised her for good work, gave a star sticker, etc. As a reward, and put the star sticker on the calendar.

 

Enuresis can be treated with positive reinforcement therapy and delight the child by giving them bigger rewards based on the number of stars every weekend.

 

When older children who can do laundry for pee, there is also a negative reinforcement treatment method that allows the child to wash wet clothes with urine.

 

This is a kind of the punishing  training, so it’s better not to have those kinds of punishmen such as the laundry.

 

PALCO WET-STOP enuresis or POTTY PAGER (www.pottypager.com) enuresis treatment alarm

 

You can try to treat enuresis first by using a machine avobe, etc.

 

Desmopressin, anticholinergic drugs such as Oxybutynin, and imipramine, can be used to treat enuresis.

 

There are also treatment options for diaper.

 

There is no cure yet.

 

Of the physiological nocturia, 98% of them are treated naturally by the age of 16, and the remaining 2% may continue to develop into adulthood.

 

Please consult with the your pediatrician after receiving diagnostic treatment.

 

 

If you have more questions, please contact us again.

Thank you.

Lee Sang-won. MD.

 

45. Study on Korean-American children-adolescents raising ……………315

The author conducted a study on raising children with the following questions and answers to 100 Korean Americans inUS.

 

The results are introduced  after questions.

 

The content of the questionnaire survey.

 

1. Which of the following priority orders do you think is most important in your life?

 

① Property or honor,

 

② God,

 

③ I,

 

④ Wife or husband,

 

Write in the order of priority that you think is the most important in your life among your children.

 

① Is the most important priority and ⑤ is the lowest priority.

 

1. Do you have a thermometer at home?

 

If there is, mark 0 in (),

 

If not, mark 0 in No ().

 

1. Can you easily take your child’s temperature when you suspect your child has a fever?

 

If there is, mark 0 in (),

 

If not, mark 0 in No ().

 

1. Do you often take your child’s temperature at home when they get sick?

 

If there is, mark 0 in (),

 

If not, mark 0 in  ().

 

1. Which of the following methods to measure your body temperature?

 

Often, mark 0 in ().

 

Anal body temperature,  mark 0 in (),

 

Oral body temperature, mark 0 in (),

 

Armpit body temperature, mark 0 in (),

 

Forehead body temperature, mark 0 in (),

 

Body temperature in the ear, mark 0 in  (),

 

Other , mark 0 in ( )

 

1. Tylenol or Acetaminophen can be used primarily for any of the following symptoms?

 

Antipyretic only, mark 0 in (),

 

As pain reliever only, mark 0 in (),

 

It can be used primarily as an antipyretic and pain reliever, mark 0 in ().

It can be used primarily for inflamation. mark 0 in ( )

 

 

1. Do you know the dosage of Tylenol?

 

If you know, mark  yes in  ()

 

If you don’t know, mark  no in ().

 

1. Motrin and Advil are trade names of Ibuprofen.

 

For what therapeutic purposes can it be used primarily?

 

To lower the fever (pyretic fever), mark 0 in (),

 

Pain  and inflammation (anti-inflammatory), mark 0 in (),

 

Make decreesing pain, mark 0 in (),

 

It can be used for  fever, pain, and inflammation (antipyretic, analgesic, anti-inflammatory), mark 0 in ().

 

Which symptoms can be treated primarily with ibuprofen. Mark the corresponding symptom as ( )

 

1. Do you know the dosage of ibuprofen when treating with ibuprofen?

 

If you know, mark  yes in  ()

 

If you don’t know, mark no in ().

 

1. Do children and adolescents (0-18 years old) have to drink cow’s milk every day?

 

If you think they must drink, mark yes in ().

 

If you think they don’t have to drink, mark no in ().

 

Briefly state why you think they should drink it.

 

Please briefly state why you think they don’t have to drink it?

 

1. Have you ever read a reference book on raising children’s health conditions?

 

If you have read it, mark yes in ()

 

If you haven’t read it, mark no in ()

 

What is the name of the book you read?

 

1. Do you have a parenting reference book at home?

 

If there is, mark yes in ()

 

If not, mark no in ()

 

What is the name of the parenting reference book in your home?

 

1. How old are you?

 

10-19 years old, mark 0 in (),

 

20-34 years old, mark 0 in (),

 

35-49 years old, mark 0 in (),

 

50-65 years old , mark 0 in (),

 

65 years old or older, mark 0 in ()

 

Mark the age as ( ).

 

What is your education?

 

High school graduate, mark 0 in (), college graduate , mark 0 in (), or higher, mark 0 in ()

Mark 0 for the corresponding academic background.

 

1. Did you get any help with raising children at today’s parenting seminar?

 

 

Get a lot (),

 

Get a little (),

 

Not helpful ().

 

Please mark it as ( )

 

1. Today’s child rearing seminar?

 

The seminar time was appropriate (),

 Was it short (),

 

Was it too long? ()

Please mark it as( )

 

1. We’ve covered some of our parenting challenges today.

 

Shall we do about an hour more (),

 

Should I stop ()

 

Please mark it as ( )

 

1. Today Was the content of the child rearing seminar easy (),

 

Was it difficult (),

 

Was it something you already knew (),

 

Please mark it as ( )

 

1. Did you ever have a chance to ask a question at today’s seminar?

 

If yes, mark  in (),

 

If not, mark in ().

 

1. Have you ever been to a seminar on raising children in the past?

 

If you have been before, mark yes in (),

 

If not, mark no in ().

 

How many times have you been there?

Please write the number you have gone in ().

 

What was the topic of the seminar?

write it down please

 

1. Have you read or have the following Parenting References?

 

① “How to Really Love Your Child, by Dr. Ross Campbell” (True Love for Children: Navigate Publishers)

 

If you have read it, mark yes in ()

 

If you have it, mark n0 in ().

 

② How to really love your teenager (Raise teenage sons and daughters like this: Seomundang Publishing House)

 

If you have read it, mark yes in ()

 

If you have it, mark it as n0 in ().

 

③ Parents should also be  least a half  doctor , by Dr. john s Lee (Cheongmungak Book Publisher)

 

If you have read it, mark yes in ()

 

If you have it, mark  no ().

 

1. Can the infectious diseases listed below cause fever?

 

① Bacterial infection

 

If there is a fever, mark yes in () and

 

If there is no, mark no in ().

 

② Virus infectious disease

 

If fever is possible, mark yes in ()

 

If there is no, mark no in ().

 

③ rheumatic fever

 

If fever is possible, mark yes in ()

 

If there is no , mark no in ().

 

1. Which of the following is the infectious disease that causes fever and sore throat (pharyngeal cavity)?.

 

① Viral pharyngitis or tonsillitis.

 

If this infectious disease can cause fever and sore throat, mark 0 in ()

 

If you have a sore throat and cannot have a fever, mark yes in ()

 

② Group A hemolytic streptococcal tonsillitis or tonsillitis and or pharyngitis.

 

If this infectious disease can cause fever and sore throat, mark yes in ()

 

If you have a sore throat and cannot have a fever, mark no in ()

 

③ The above two types of infectious diseases can be caused by bacterial infection.

 

If correct, mark yes  in ()

 

Otherwise, mark  no in ().

 

1. Viral tonsillitis or viral pharyngitis

 

① It must be treated with antibiotics.

 

If correct, mark yes  in ()

 

Otherwise, put n0 in ().

 

② There is no need to be treated with antibiotics.

 

If correct, mark yes  in ()

 

Otherwise, put n0 in ().

 

1. Any recommendations or questions for today’s seminar?

 

■ The following is the answer to the above survey.

 

1. Write down the most important priorities in your life in order?

 

1. Is the most important priority,
2. Is. the next most important priority,
3. Is the next most important priority,

4 . Is the 3 next most important priority,
5.  Is the lowest priority

 

2. ① God, ② children, ③ wife or husband, ④ me, ⑤ honor or property-5 people

 

2. ① God, ② I, ③ wife or husband, ④ children, ⑤ honor or property – 7 people

 

3. ① God, ② wife or husband, ③ children, ④ me, ⑤ honor or property-11 people

 

4. ① God, ② children, ③ me, ④ husband, ⑤ honor or wealth-2 people

 

5. ① God, ② I, ③ children, ④ husband, ⑤ wealth, ⑥ honor-2 people

 

6. ① God, ② I, ③ wealth, ④ husband, ⑤ honor -1 person

 

7. ① God, ② parent, ③ child, ④ business, ⑤ honor-1 person

 

8. ① God, ② I, ③ children, ④ wealth, ⑤ honor-1 person

 

9. ① God, ② wife (husband), ③ children, ④ honor, ⑤ wealth-3 people

 

10. ① God, ② wife (husband), ③ me, ④ children, ⑤ honor -1 person

 

11. ① God, ② children, ③ couple, ④ church-1 person

 

12. ① God, ② couple, ③ children, ④ society-1 person

 

13. ① God, ② Family, ③ Health, ④ Love-1 person

 

14. ① Faith, ② Family, ③ Church, ④ Love-1 person

 

15. ① God, ② children, ③ wife, ④ honor, ⑤ wealth-1 person

 

16. ① God, ② children, ③ me, ④ wealth, ⑤ honor-1 person

 

17. ① God, ② Family-2 people

 

18. ① I, ② wife, ③ honor, ④ children, ⑤ property-1 person

 

19. ① I 1 person, ③ wife, ④ children, ⑤ honor-1 person

 

20. ① Me, ② God, ③ Honor, ④ Children, ⑤ Wife-1 person

 

21. ① Me, ② Wife, ③ Children, ④ Property, ⑤ God-1 person

 

22. ① I, ② wife, ③ God of wealth-1 person

 

23. ① Child rearing, ② health, ③ business, ④ calm-1 person

 

24. ① Child education, ② family peace, ③ family dialogue, ④ prayer for all-1 person

 

25. ① husband, ② me, ③ children, ④ son-1 person

 

26. ① Family health, ② child education, ③ fullness of the Holy Spirit, ④ love and prosperity-1 person

 

27. ① Child, ② Husband, ③ God, ④ Me-1 person

 

28. ① Child education, ② Family reconciliation, ③ Economic power-1 person

 

29. ① Family, ② Religion, ③ Happiness, ④ Health-1 person

 

30. ① Family, ② Children, ③ Health-1 person

 

31. ① Health, ② Children, ③ Religion-1 person

 

32. ① Study (occupation), ② Children, ③ Health-1 person

 

33. ① Health, ② Children, ③ Husband, ④ Money-1 person

 

34. ① Health, ② Children, ③ Husband, ④ Love-1 person

 

35. ① Child, ② Wife, ③ Me, ④ Honor, ⑤ God-1 person

 

36. ① Family, ② My job (future), ③ The future of children, ④ Peace for humanity-1 person

 

37. ① child, ② wife, ③ grandchild-1 person

 

38. No response-13 people in total

 

1. Do you have a thermometer at home?

 

A.

 

Yes-50 people,

 

No – 26 people,

 

No response – 2 people

 

1. Can you take your temperature right?

 

A.

 

Yes-57 people,

 

No-16 people,

 

No response – 5 people

 

1. When your child gets sick, is it often time to take his temperature at home?

 

A.

 

Yes-47 people,

 

No-27 people,

 

No response-4 people

 

1. Which of the following methods do you take to take your temperature?

 

A.

 

Anal body temperature-5 people

 

Oral body temperature-24 people

 

Armpit body temperature – 29 people

 

Forehead body temperature – 8 people

 

Ear temperature-4 people

 

From guitar

 

Touch it with your hand – 1 person

 

Touching the neck-1 person

 

1. Which of the following therapeutic purposes are Tylenol drugs used for?

 

A.

 

Antipyretic only – 22 people

 

As a pain reliever only – 6 people

 

As an antipyretic and analgesic – 46 people

 

No response – 4 people

 

 

1. Do you know the dosage of Tylenol?

 

1. Example-28 people,

 

No – 20 people,

 

No response – 3 people,

 

No problem-27 people

 

 

1. Motrin, Advil, or Iveprofen for which of the following purposes?

 

1. Antipyretic only – 13 people

 

As a pain reliever only – 14 people

 

Painkillers and anti-inflammatory drugs only – 11 people

 

Antipyretic and analgesic and anti-inflammatory drugs-16 people

 

No response-24 people

 

1. Do you know the therapeutic dose of Motrin?

 

A.

 

Example-19 people,

 

No – 23 people,

 

No response-11 people,

 

No problem-25 people

 

 

1. Do children have to eat Cow’s milk every day?

 

1. Example-62 people,

 

No – 12 people,

 

No response – 4 people

 

 

1. Children must eat milk. The reason is that?

 

1. Calcium intake-5 people

 

Well big and healthy – 1 person

 

Because milk fat is needed – 1 person

 

Because it’s good in every way – 1 person

 

Good nutrition-5 people

 

Vitamin-1 person

 

1. Have you ever read parenting books?

 

A.

 

Example-50 people,

 

No-25 people,

 

No response – 3 people

 

1. What is the name of the parenting reference book you read in the past?

 

A.

 

Children like this – 1

 

Give your children a blessing prayer every day

 

Obedient child

 

Dr. Spoke Pediatrics

 

Be a person rather than an elite

 

No way my child

 

Family with a teenager

 

Grow in a small voice

 

James Dubson’s Book

 

Mom to mom

 

For correct child education

 

Talmud

 

First pregnancy and childbirth

 

About prenatal education

 

Family medicine encyclopedia

 

Child education

 

Raise your teenage sons and daughters like this

 

Children’s encyclopedia

 

Temperament and child education

 

You can do it yourself.

 

Jewish Education Law

 

Some people said they couldn’t finish the first reading.

 

 

1. Do you have any reference books on raising children?

 

1. No – 34 people,

 

No response – 5 people

 

 

Q.The name of the parenting book you are reading?

 

A.

Education for children from 3 to 5 years old-1

 

Talmud-1

 

Family Medicine Encyclopedia– 1

 

10 Ways to Tell Your Child You Love You – 1

 

How to raise the gifted-1

 

Well baby book- 1

 

First Pregnancy and Birth– 1

 

Early Childhood Education-1

 

Because of the children– 1

 

American Child Education– 1

 

Be a person rather than an elite-1

 

No way my child– 1

 

What’s wrong with our children-1

 

Temperament and Child Education– 1

 

Personal Child Education– 1

 

Jew’s Child Education– 1

 

Age-appropriate child education– 1

 

Parenting Education Act-1

 

Listening to a lot of seminars such as radio counseling– 1

 

1. How old are you?

 

A.

 

10-19 years old-none

 

20-34 years old-6 people

 

35-49 years-22 people

 

50-65 years old-13 people

 

65 years and over – 7 people

 

1. What is your final education level?

 

A.

 

High School—12 students

 

University—18 students

 

More than that—2 people

 

No response—5 people

 

1. Did the seminar help you raise your child?

 

A.

 

A lot—31 people,

 

A little bit—14 people,

 

No response— 4 people,

 

1. What’s the time for today’s seminar?

 

A.

 

Appropriate – 18 people

 

Short – 12

 

Too long – 4 people

 

A little long-1 person

 

No response – 14 people

 

Others– 29 people

 

1. We’ve covered some of our parenting challenges today. Shall we do the rest for an hour or so?

 

A.

 

Example-22 people

 

No – 15 people

 

No response – 12 people

 

Others– 29 people

 

1. Was the content of today’s seminar too easy?

 

A.

 

Example – 20 people

 

No – 9 people

 

No response – 20 people

 

Others– 29 people

 

1. Did you already know the contents of the seminar?

 

A.

 

Example – 16 people

 

No – 10

 

No response-23 people

 

Others– 29 people

 

Can you understand the contents of today’s seminar?

 

A.

 

Example – 33 people

 

No – 3 people

 

No response – 2 people

 

Others– 40 people

 

1. Did you ever have a chance to ask a question in today’s seminar?

 

A.

 

Example – 16 people

 

No – 12

 

No response – 21 people

 

Others– 29 people

 

1. Have you ever attended a parenting seminar?

 

A.

 

Example – 20 people

 

No – 30 people

 

No response – 18 people

 

Others – 10 people

 

1. If so, how many times?

 

A.

 

Number 1-3 people

 

Number 2-4 people

 

Number 3-3 people

 

Number 4-2 people

 

Number 5-1 person

 

Number 7-1 person

 

1. What is the topic of the seminar?

 

A.

 

Upright child rearing

 

On constitutional sexuality

 

Child education, school, home education

 

Children’s school life

 

How to do child education

 

Children’s school life

 

Parenting of adolescent children

 

Child Education Seminar

 

Parenting of youth problem children (school curriculum)

 

1. Have you read the following parenting reference book?

 

A.

 

How to really love your child (2 people)

 

How to really love your teenager (Raise teenage sons and daughters like this: Seomundang Publishing House)-7 people

 

Child and Family Nursing Encyclopedia-Parents should also be anti-doctors: Heongmungak Book Publisher)-11

 

No response-11 people

 

Did not hear-47 people

 

1. Could you understand the seminar?

 

A.

 

Yes-34 people

 

No-2 people

 

No response-2 people

 

1. Was the content easy?.

 

A.

 

Yes-19 people

 

No-8 people

 

No response-5 people

 

1. Do you know everything?

 

A.

 

Yes-16 people

 

No-12 people

 

No response-5 people

 

1. Which of the following causes fever?

 

Bacterial infection

 

A.

 

Example-12 people,

 

No – 7 people

 

No response – 18 people

 

Q.Viral infectious diseases

 

A.

 

Example-22 people

 

No – 1 person

 

No response – 14 people

 

1. Rheumatic fever?

 

A.

 

Example – 6 people

 

No – 7 people

 

No response – 24 people

 

1. One of the following causes of fever and sore throat

 

It is a viral pharyngitis or tonsillitis.

 

A.

 

Example-22 people

 

No – 1 person

 

No response – 14 people

 

1. Streptococcal tonsillitis or tonsillitis or pharyngitis.

 

A.

 

Example – 10 people,

 

No – 7 people,

 

No response – 20 people

 

1. These two types of bacteria can be the cause.

 

A.

 

Example – 13 people

 

No – 3 people

 

No response – 21 people

 

1. Viral tonsillitis or pharyngitis must be treated with antibiotics.

 

A.

 

Example-19 people

 

No – 3 people

 

No response – 15 people

 

1. There is no need to be treated with antibiotics.

 

A.

 

Example – 6 people,

 

No – 9 people,

 

No response – 22 people

 

1. Recommendations or questionnaires for today’s seminar

 

61. Watching the dying child, I was with him and his family at the final moment of his life.

…………………………………………345

Watching the dying child

 

When treating pediatric patients as a pediatrician, there were a few pediatric patients who died unavoidably even after all the treatments in the world that both doctors and parents can do.

 

It was at this time that I had the most difficult situation during my pediatric care for almost 4 decades.

 

Even with the best treatment, the deaths of especially three children among the 500 thousand patients seen by me.

 

 I have wached a four-year-old child with leukemia who died while her parents were watching her in her bed at 2 am after being diagnosed and treatment with the most famous and best-known Pediatricians in Pediatric Hospital in, Harvard Medical School in  Boston .

 

The death of a 12-year-old male patient with cystic fibrosis, dying in front of his parents and siblings in the bed of a pediatric ward in a local hospital, Windham Hospital.

 

Several decades ago, I watched a boy with his mother who was watching her son dying from renal failure for more 7 years in a pediatric ward at Seoul City children Hospital, but I still remember them more vividly.

 

I was with hisor her  parents for at the last moment when a child left this world.

 

I quietly comforted her or his parents and family until the moment her or his child died were one of the precious healing arts

 

Afer I hugged her or his parents and I left silently.

 

 

 

 

 

 

47. One hundred Qs & As on common cold

 

What kind of illness is cold?

 

A.The entire airway is divided into the upper respiratory tract and lower respiratory tract.

The part of the airway from the nostril to the larynx is called the upper respiratory tract, and the airways from the lower part of the pharynx to the lung which is the lower repiratory tract which can be divided into the epiglottis, larynx, trachea, bronchi, bronchioles, and lungs

 

The upper respiratory tract includes the nostrils, nasal cavity, sinuses, adenoids, pharynx, and tonsils.

The upper respiratory tract is infected by any kind of virus is called a cold or common cold.

Cold is the most common infectious disease among humans.

The common cold viral infection that anyone has at least once or twice in a lifetime is a cold.

There are nearly 200 kinds of viruses that may cause a cold. The coronavirus also is one kind of virus to causes the common cold.

There are many viruses that cause a common cold may not infect only one part of the upper respiratory tract, but simultaneously infects the nasal cavity, sinuses, adenoids, pharynx, and tonsils in the upper respiratory tract and other parts of the body.

In clinical practice, a cold is called by the various names of diseases as follows.

 

• Common cold,
• Upper respiratory tract infection (URI),
• Acute viral rhinitis,
• Acute viral nasopharyngitis,
• Acute viral pharyngotonsillitis,
• It is also called a runny nose (Rhinitis).
• A cold is sometimes called rhinosinusitis.
• and cold

People with colds or people who do not have a cold but carry a virus that can cause colds, breathe problems, cough, and speaking problems.

 If you are infected with the “cold virus” you may spread the cold virus thru the sputum or droplets to others, they will catch a cold.

 

1. What are the causes of the cold

 

1. If one or several types of viruses over 150 to 200 species such as rhinovirus, adenovirus, coronavirus, parainfluenza virus, and coxsackievirus may cause infection in the upper respiratory tract, you can catch a cold.

Cold is also called cold or common cold as mentioned.

Among the 150 to 200 kinds of viruses that can cause colds, there are some viruses that cause colds more often.

Rhinovirus, adenovirus, or coronavirus are more common causes of colds.

These various viruses further are subdivided into several virus strains.

Therefore, the number of viruses that cause colds is much more than 150-200 species when each virus type and virus genus are combined.

If the upper respiratory tract is infected with one of the many types of virus or a subgenus virus belonging to that one type of virus, you can catch a cold.

Because there are hundreds of types of viruses that can cause colds, we cannot make all vaccinations against each virus.

For reference, bacterial infections do not cause colds.

 

1. Is there any reason or factors to get frequent cold

 

A.

• There are many conditions and factors that make you more prone to colds.
• Some children are born with a constitution that is more prone to colds.
• Have a history of bronchial asthma, atopic dermatitis, allergic rhinitis, or any other type of allergic disease
• Children with a current history of allergic diseases such as children with an atopic constitution are more likely to get cold.
• You can get it often, and once you get a cold, it’s usually more severe.
• Wearing cold clothes, in a humid place, sleeping in the cold, in the rain,
• Having mental and physical weakness,
• Are malnourished,
• Lack of physical exercise,
• Living in an unclean environment,
• Children and toddlers who often go to places where many children and adults gather, such as nursery schools and daycare,
• Or, stressed children are more prone to colds, and the secondary bacterial infections during colds include otitis media, sinusitis, and more severe secondary bacterial infections such as pneumonia, may be more prone.

1. Do newborns and infants get colds too?

 

1. Newborns and infants can also get a cold.

Newborns and infants who are young than 6 months may resist viral infection when they are infected with a virus that can cause cold.

 It is common to receive an immune body from the mother before it is born.

For this reason, it is common for most of the newborns an d infants before 6 months of age or most of the infants not to catch colds.

However, because they may not have immunity from their moms for more than 200 kinds of viruses that can cause a cold.

Sometimes they were born with enough cold virus immunity,

In addition, depending on the concentration of various cold virus immunities in the body of newborns and infants, newborns and infants can also get colds or not.

(For convenience, the virus that causes a cold is called a cold virus.)

 

In general, the younger child is, the worse it is for them to get sick once they have a cold.

In addition, newborns and infants are less likely to catch colds because they have fewer opportunities to get close to people outside the household.

 

As described above, when newborns or infants catch a cold, the symptoms of the cold can be more severe and affect them.

 

Secondary bacterial infections, such as otitis media or pneumonia, may be more prone in newborns and infants when they get cold.

Since the total length of the upper and lower airways of newborns and infants is very short, almost equal to the length of one of their little fingers, the infection does not occur in only one part of the upper respiratory tract, but occasionally occurs throughout the lower respiratory tracts, rhinitis, and pharyngitis. And  Laryngitis, bronchitis, bronchiolitis, etc. may occur together

 

1. What are the cold symptoms in newborn infants and infants?

 

1. When newborns or infants catch cold, atypical signs of cold symptoms may appear compared to those of colds in older infants and school-aged children.

For example, it is common for infants and school-age children to deliberately open their mouths and breathe through their mouths (oral breathing) as needed instead of breathing through their noses when the nose is stuffed by a cold.

In newborns and infants, the nasal cavity is narrower and smaller, and it is common for the nasal passages to become more easily clogged if they catch a cold.

So instead of breathing through their nose (instead of breathing through their nasal passages), they have to deliberately open their mouth and breathe through their mouth.

However, newborns and infants often cannot breathe properly with their mouth opened or thru the nose because they are immature with the ability to breathe that way.

So when they catch a cold, breathing difficulties can sometimes be severe.

When the nose is stuffed by a cold, sometimes newborns or infants cannot suck their mother’s breast milk well, nor they can suck artificial nutrient bottle nipples.

So they feel more difficult to breathe.

In other words, newborns and infants are unable to open their mouths and breathe smoothly when their nose is stuffed with a cold.

Infants of preschool age, school-age children, and adolescents may also have a cold, congestion of their nose, and difficulty breathing through their nose.

However, they can deliberately open their mouths when their nose is clogged and take some oral breath through their mouths.

As explained above, the size of the nasal cavity of newborns and infants is less than that of school-age children or adolescent children.

It’s much smaller, so it can easily get clogged up by a cold, and once their nose is clogged, They are more likely to have trouble breathing and suffer a lot more.

Newborns and infants have a whole body ache from a cold, a mild fever, and a headache, but they can’t express well in words, so they whining, fluffing, and crying.

 Symptoms such as backache may occur.

They may also lose their appetite and not eat well.

Sometimes, the virus that caused the cold infects the gastrointestinal tract and causes gastroenteritis.

 

At this time, symptoms of a cold may appear and symptoms of viral gastroenteritis may appear.

Sometimes, symptoms of gastroenteritis, such as diarrhea and vomiting, may be present.

In addition, the cold virus does not only infect the upper respiratory tract but also simultaneously infects the lower respiratory tract such as viral bronchitis, viral bronchiolitis,

They  can have viral pneumonia, croup, etc. at the same time.

During a cold, newborns and infants are more susceptible to secondary bacterial infections, such as bacterial otitis media or bacterial pneumonia.

 

1. How many times does a child get cold a year?

 

1. Studies have shown that one child has a cold at least 6 to 7 times a year, and some children have 22 times a year.

In nurseries, kindergartens, or elementary schools, where many infants and school-age children gather, especially infants and toddlers catch colds more often.

Preschool infants and toddlers do fewer catch colds when they stay with their parents at home, but they usually catch more colds as soon as they start going to nurseries or kindergartens where many infants gather.

The youngest infants and toddlers among several household members get colds more frequently than other household members.

In one family, while living primarily with their parents, infants and toddlers often catch a cold during the first few months after they start going to nursery, kindergarten, or elementary school. Other infants and toddlers who come there may be infected with a cold virus, a virus that caused other types of upper and lower respiratory tract infections, or a virus that caused gastroenteritis, resulting in cold and viral gastroenteritis.

 

1. What are the cold symptoms and signs in children?

 

1. We have already explained the symptoms of colds in newborns and infants.

Here, we look at the symptoms of a cold in older infants and school ages after newborn and infancy.

Symptoms of colds differ depending on the type of virus that causes a cold in children, the age of the child, the presence of complications from having a cold, and the illness other than the cold.

It is common for the main symptoms of a cold to appear after an incubation period for 2 to 6 days after the virus has infected the upper respiratory tract.

Typical main symptomatic signs of a cold are runny nose, watery eyes, stuffy nose, sneezing, general malaise, mild to high fever, headache, pharyngeal pruritus, sore throat, muscle pain, fatigue,  cough, and loss of appetite depend upon the kind of viruses.

Usually, the main symptoms of a cold in children last 4 days to 10 days.

 Rarely, it lasts for 14 days.

It is common to get sick and heal naturally.

However, depending on the child’s age and the type of virus that caused the cold, the symptoms and signs can vary greatly.

Symptoms of a cold vary slightly from time to time depending on whether you have cold-induced bronchial asthma when you have a cold, or whether there are complications arising from secondary bacterial infection and the severity of the complication.

However, symptoms other than a cold should be suspected if symptoms persist for more than 10 days, or rarely 14 days. as you know well, SARS( severe  acute respiratory syndrome)-COV2( coronavirus 2) can cause either th cold or severe COVID -19

 

1. Can children with cold go to school while having a cold

 

1. There may be symptoms such as sore throat, tiredness, runny nose, headache, and mild fever when they have a cold, but there are many students who go to school every day with a cold.

A cold is a type of upper respiratory virus infectious disease.

The virus that caused the cold is likely to spread to other students or other people around cold patient. However, in general, it is not necessary to isolate children who have colds from children who do not.

Most of the time, even if children with colds are isolated, the effect of isolation is practically insignificant.

In most cases, it’s common for children to get cold 6 to 7 times a year.

Some children get cold 22 times a year mentioned above.

If they don’t go to school for a week or two weeks every time you have a cold, they can’t go to school for at least two months a year according to calculation.

When a child living in the same neighborhood starts to get a cold, almost all children in that neighborhood can get a cold.

Therefore, it is not a practical way to prevent cold treatment to isolate a child with a cold from other students without sending it to school.

When a child in school begins to have a cold, most of the students in the class may already have a mild cold or maybe in a dormant state, even if the other students in the class do not have an asymptomatic cold.

For one reason or another, students who have a cold, but can go to school if there are no signs of symptoms severe enough to go to school and their health is generally good. However, it’s a good idea to take into account your specific situation and ask your regular doctor to decide if you can go to school.

Nowadays the Sars-covid-2 infection may give viral URI  and/or it may cause severe Covid-19.  If somebody has a corona virus infection with a symptom or no symptom,  she or he must be isolated according.

 

1. Do children cough due to cold?

 

1. When children only have a cold, they can cough a little.

When children have a cold, a runny nose can flow into your nostrils and flow through the posterior nostril to the upper pharyngeal cavity.

When a cold-induced irritates the nasal mucosa, they can sneeze and cough a little.

When the mucous membrane of the pharyngeal cavity is irritated by a runny nose from the posterior nostril, you can cough a little.

In addition, when the pharyngeal mucosa is irritated due to inflammation in the pharynx due to a cold, a gentle cough can occur a little.

However, when you only have a cold, you will not cough to spit the expert from your chest and your phlegm does not come out of your lower respiratory tract.

In other words, the cough from the chest does not come out and phlegm does not come out of the lower respiratory tract.

A cold can cause a sore throat, which can make your pharynx itchy and cough a little.

Unless there are complications, most common colds are viral infections caused by confined to the upper respiratory tract.

When children have a cold, don’t cough up your sputum from the chest unless you have complications such as laryngitis (viral croup), bronchial asthma, bronchitis, bronchiolitis, or pneumonia.

When coughing out of the chest while spitting out sputum, whether you are suspicious of having a cold and asthma together, cold and pneumonia together, or a cold and bronchitis together, etc., it is good to be sure that you have a respiratory illness other than a cold.

 

Q.Cold is lasting more than two weeks, Why?

 

1. In most cases, symptoms of a cold last 4 to 10 days and then heal naturally.

Rarely lasts for 14 days. However, if the cold continues for more than 10 to 14 days and does not completely heal, consider the following cases.

Whether you have complications such as sinusitis, otitis media, allergic rhinitis, or bronchial asthma while having a cold

Whether you are suffering from a disease other than a cold, rather than cold from the very beginning.

You should suspect whether you have a cold and other infectious or non-infectious diseases at the same time.

A bacterial infection in the sinuses during a cold can lead to sinusitis, a bacterial infection in the middle ear can lead to acute otitis media, and a lung infection can lead to pneumonia.

When there is a complication such as a secondary bacterial infection, the symptoms of the complication and the symptoms of a cold already exist appear together.

In particular, if a cold may induce bronchial asthma, you may suffer from a cold and asthma together from the beginning of a cold, and then the symptoms of bronchial asthma continue to occur even though the cold is over, and you may suffer from cold-induced asthmatic coughing for a long time.

 

1. How to make a diagnosis of the cold?

 

1. You can easily diagnose a cold by synthesizing your medical history, symptoms, and physical examination findings.

However, initial symptoms of various types of viral upper and lower respiratory infections, or bacterial upper and lower respiratory infections may sometimes be similar to those of colds.

In general, such infectious diseases and colds should be diagnosed differentially.

Especially,

• Flu,
• Group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal pharyngitis or tonsillitis,
• Infectious mono,
• laryngitis,
• croup,
• Bronchial asthma,
• Bronchiolitis,
• bronchitis,
• Or, you should differentially diagnose pneumonia and colds.
• It should be diagnosed differently from sinusitis or allergic rhinitis.
• In many other cases, the initial symptoms of systemic infectious diseases are similar to those of a cold.

So sometimes doctors and parents can misdiagnose that they have a cold that they have other types of infectious diseases.

Anyone of all ages, especially when infants and toddlers have a cold and suddenly have a high fever, feel worse than the symptoms of a cold, and do not eat well, and do not laugh well (when in a toxic state), a secondary bacterial infection. It is important to think that there is a possibility of complications occurring in any part of the body.

In that case, you should seek medical attention immediately.

 

1. Why to take throat cultures with throat mucosa when to have a sore throat when my children go to the pediatric office for a sore throat.

 

1. When you go to the local Pediatric office for a sore throat, there are many cases of bacterial pharyngitis as well as viral pharyngitis.

There are many causes of sore throat.

The causes can be largely divided into three.

First, pharyngitis can be caused by group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal infectious pharyngitis and, or tonsillitis.

Second, pharyngitis can be caused by viral infectious pharyngitis and/or pharyngeal tonsillitis.

Third, a sore throat can be caused by other causes.

In other words, pharyngeal pain can be caused by viral pharyngitis, and/or group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal pharyngitis or pharyngeal tonsillitis can occur.

When you have a sore throat, it is difficult just to look into the pharynx with the naked eye and determine whether a viral infection causes a sore throat, which is the result of pharyngitis, or whether a bacterial infection has caused a sore throat.

Therefore, in order to differentially diagnose these two types of pharyngitis, a group A beta-hemolytic streptococcus bacterial culture test or group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal antigen-antibody aggregation reaction test can be performed with mucus collected with a cotton swab from the pharyngeal mucosa. Sometimes two tests can be done simultaneously.

If the result is positive, the pharyngeal pain can be diagnosed as a result of group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal pharyngitis, and if it is negative, it is common to reverse diagnose that pharyngitis has occurred due to viral pharyngitis.

Without such a bacteriological test, it is difficult to reliably diagnose whether the pharyngitis is caused by viral pharyngitis or group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal pharyngitis.

Viral pharyngitis as used herein includes cold, infectious mono, or flu or COVID-19.

If the sore throat is caused by a viral upper respiratory tract, such as a cold, the viral upper respiratory tract is not treated with antibiotics. However, sore throat caused by group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal pharyngitis should be treated with antibiotics.

Treating a sore throat in this way can lead to a dilemma for both the doctor, the patient, and the country.

The patient has the right to know and the right to receive the most appropriate treatment, and the doctor has the duty to give the most appropriate treatment.

If you come to the local pediatric office complaining of symptoms of cold or sore throat, do a group A beta-hemolytic streptococcus bacterial culture test or a group A beta-hemolytic streptococcus antigen-antibody agglutination test normally, and if the result is positive, antibiotics which the common treatment method in the United States is to start treatment with and if negative, start treatment with no antibiotics.

Sometimes they have to do another pediatric visit a few days later to do catch-up treatment,

The cost of a beta-hemolytic streptococcus bacterial culture test for a group A beta-hemolytic streptococcus antigen-antibody agglutination test varies depending on

 

1. How to treat the common cold?

 

1. Cold is a type of viral infection in the upper respiratory tract. That is, viral acute upper respiratory tract infection.

Cold is also known as  Common cold, URI, or upper respiratory tract infection. It is also called acute nasopharyngitis instead of the name of a cold.

Although influenza is called flu, it is a very different type of viral respiratory infection from the cold. Because the symptoms and signs of the two diseases of influenza and cold are different and sometimes have similarities, it is sometimes difficult to reliably differentiate the two diseases from each other based on symptomatic symptoms and examination findings without especially performing clinical tests.

There are no special drugs that can cure some of the cold, and there are no other special treatment methods.

In addition, there are no reliably preventable methods, no drugs, no preventive vaccines, and no preventable drugs.

There are no medications that make colds heal faster and easier, and there are no treatments that will definitely work.

    Antibiotics have no effect on treating a cold, and if you treat a cold with antibiotics, the antibiotic treatment can cause side effects.

Also, antibiotics or antiviral drugs cannot prevent colds.

During a cold, secondary bacterial infections such as bacterial otitis media, bacterial sinusitis, or bacterial pneumonia can develop. There is no clear way to prevent such complications from occurring.

The initial symptom signs of a cold are diverse and are often similar to those of many other types of infectious diseases or other diseases in our bodies.

For that reason, if children suspect to have a cold, it is ideal to seek medical advice or diagnostic treatment.

However, in many cases, it is often unclear whether even the doctor is not sure whether he is really only suffering from a cold or has other complications.

In general, it is common to make a presumptive diagnosis that you are not suffering from any secondary bacterial infectious disease other than a cold and that you are only suffering from a cold, and then treat a common cold according to the symptoms at that time. There are virtually no cold remedies.

In general, when you have a cold, the most ideal treatment is to drink plenty of fluids and rest comfortably while at home, mentally and physically rest.

Symptoms vary depending on the severity and age of the symptoms, but for infants and school-age children, it is good to take a rest while watching TV at home or reading a book.

That doesn’t mean you need to lie down and relax in the house until the cold is over from the first day after you start to catch a cold.

Refrain from excessive physical exercise until the cold is over.

Symptoms such as pain and fever, such as headache, muscle pain, sore throat, etc., can be symptomatically treated with antipyretic analgesics such as Tylenol or Ibuprofen.

If possible, follow your doctor’s instructions even when receiving treatment with these types of drugs.

These days, aspirin is not used to treat colds.

Infants of preschool age or school-age children who have a cold and runny nose and have a stuffy nose should blow and wipe their nose frequently.

Blowing your nose too hard can cause germs in your nasal passages to get into your middle ear or into your sinuses, so make them sneak.

When infants and toddlers have a stuffy nose and are unable to eat breast milk or artificial nutrition well and are suffering from sleep, it is treated as much as wiping the nose. You can treat nasal congestion by putting the physiological saline solution into their nasal cavity.

These days, children under 2-6 years of age are not treated with oral-nasal mucosal decongestants unless directed by a doctor.

In particular, oral-nasal mucosal decongestants should not be used to treat colds in infants and younger children before 6 years old.

Nasal mucosa decongestion spray that can be sprayed in the nasal cavity and treated.

Drops to relieve nasal mucosa congestion that can be dropped into the nasal cavity (drops),

Oral nasal mucosa decongestion drops,

Or, it manufactures and sells drugs that can be used in various types of cold treatment, such as nasal mucosa decongestion drugs.

From October 2007, the US Food and Drug Administration (FDA) recommends that patients no longer sell or use cold cough medicines and cold medicines for children (OTC) that patients can buy and use in pharmacy shelves without a doctor’s prescription.

In particular, antihistamines, nasal mucosa decongestants, and cold cough suppressants are not used to treat colds for children under 6 years of age because they can be harmful to children’s health, the effect of treating colds is not clear, and other problems such as side effects can occur.

According to www.FAAP.org/new/kidcolds.htm, the following cold medications should not be used to treat colds in children aged 6 years. 

• Dimetapp: Decongestant Plus Cough Infant Drops,
• Dimetapp: Decongestant Infant Drops,
• Little Colds: Decongestant Plus Cough,
• Little Colds: Multi-Symptom Cold Formula,
• PEDIACARE : Infant Drops Decongestant (containing pseudoephedrine),
• PEDIACARE :  Infant Drops Decongestant & Cough (containing pseudoephedrine),
• PEDIACARE: Infant Dropper Decongestant (containing phenylephrine),
• PEDIACARE Infant Dropper Long-Acting Cough,
• PEDIACARE : Infant Dropper Decongestant & Cough (containing phenylephrine),
• Robitussin: Infant Cough DM Drops,
• Triaminic: Infant & Toddler Thin Strips(R) Decongestant,
• Triaminic: Infant & Toddler Thin Strips(R) Decongestant Plus Cough,
• TYLENOL: Concentrated Infants’ Drops Plus Cold,
• TYLENOL: Concentrated Infants’ Drops Plus Cold & Cough
• When pre-adolescent infants suffer from clogged noses from a cold, they can be treated with drops of nasal mucosal decongestants according to the doctor’s instructions.
• When school-age children or teenagers after the age of 6 have a cold and develop nasal mucosa congestion and their nose is blocked, they can be treated with a nasal mucosa decongestant such as Afrin/oxymetazoline or neo synephrine according to the doctor’s instructions.

The nasal mucosa decongestant has a pharmacological action that relieves nasal mucosal congestion by constricting the congestive capillaries of the nasal mucosa and constricts swollen mucous membranes and capillaries to clear the blocked nasal cavity.

Actifed, Dimetapp, and PediaCare were OTC comprehensive cold medicines that were often used to treat childhood colds. In other words, it is an oral comprehensive cold medicine that can relieve capillary congestion in the nasal mucosa.

That kind of general cold medicine usually contains drug components such as nasal mucosa and capillary decongestants and antihistamines. Sometimes it can contain two or three different types of drug components. This type of medicine can be used as directed by a doctor when treating a cold in school-age or adolescent children after age 6

sudafed contains a drug component that can relieve capillary congestion in the nasal mucosa. These types of drugs can also cure a cold by adjusting the treatment dose according to age and symptoms. You can choose one of several nasal mucosa capillary decongestants and use them as directed by your doctor.

However, ask your doctor if this type of drug can cure colds for infants and young children before 6 years of age, and then follow your doctor’s instructions to treat colds.

In children after 6 years of age, cold without complications can be treated appropriately as an antipyretic analgesic or as a nasal mucosa decongestant according to the doctor’s instructions.

When the symptoms of a cold are mild, it is common to stop using these types of medicines and heal naturally after a few days.

However, if complications arise from secondary bacterial infections such as bacterial otitis media or bacterial sinusitis, secondary bacterial infection is appropriately treated with antibiotics.

If bronchial asthma is induced by a cold, treat asthma appropriately with appropriate asthma medication.

You can buy drugs to treat a common cold at a pharmacy without a doctor’s prescription, but it is a rule to buy and use such cold drugs according to your doctor’s advice.

Pharyngeal pain caused by a cold and a sore throat caused by viral upper respiratory tract is not effective in antibiotic treatment.

However, pharyngitis caused by group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal infection should be treated with antibiotics to cure the pharyngitis and the pharyngeal pain.

Treating such a complex cold can lead to a dilemma for both doctors, patients, and countries.

Because patients, of course, have the right to know and receive the most appropriate treatment, and doctors need to give the best treatment.

If a patient comes to the pediatric office with symptoms of cold or sore throat, do a group A beta-hemolytic streptococcus bacterial culture test or a group A beta-hemolytic streptococcal antigen-antibody aggregation test. If the result is positive, treat with antibiotics and if negative It is common not to treat antibiotics. However, there are also problems with these treatments. Sometimes, you have to visit a pediatric office again for follow-up treatment, and the cost of performing a beta-hemolytic streptococcus bacterial culture test for a group A beta-hemolytic streptococcus antigen-antibody agglutination test depends on where you live. At the same time, it costs about 10 to 30 dollars for one inspection.

Once you have a cold, the cost of seeing a doctor, the cost of diagnostic treatment, and or of these and other treatments can be substantial.

It is rare for only one member of the family to catch a cold, and when all members of the family have a cold, the entire family may need to undergo diagnostic treatment together. In addition, assuming that a common cold is infectious throughout the country or across the country and all the people are ill, the cost of treating a cold can be an astronomical number in order to properly diagnose and treat a cold. 

1. Should we concern any foods for cold? 

1. During the first few days of having a cold, it is common to lose appetite and not eat well.

Forced feeding of food to such a young child can cause vomiting.

Sometimes eating a small amount too can cause vomiting too.

Therefore, you should not force food to be fed.

Ask your regular pediatrician and doctor to find out what foods are good for the cold at that time.

Newborns and infants who are breastfed or who are on artificial nutrition can be fed breast milk or artificial nutrition as usual.

After infancy, if infants or school-age children do not eat well, they eat whole or semi-liquid foods that can be easily digested, such as fruit juice, barley tea, meat broth, or rice porridge.

Drink plenty of water to prevent dehydration.

As they gradually recover and their appetite improves, gradually change to the food which they normally eat.

During the first few days of a cold, they use less energy because they are less physically active than usual.

In addition, all functions of the whole body are reduced by a cold. For this reason, the function of the digestive system is also reduced by a cold, so it is common to eat little by little. Sometimes a cold virus infection in the gastrointestinal tract can make it difficult to digest

It is better not to eat cow milk or milk foods that contain cow milk as much as possible because cow milk or foods containing cow milk components are not digested well while suffering a cold. 

1. Is a humidifier helpful for cold treatment? 

1. It is generally not recommended to use a humidifier to treat colds.

However, you can use a humidifier to control the humidity in the room.

The humidity spray from the humidifier has little effect on cold treatment.

In particular, make sure that the spray from the humidifier does not go directly to the patient.

If you use a humidifier, the interior of the bedroom may become damp and the floor may become wet and slip, resulting in safety accidents such as falls.

Instead of using a humidifier, drink plenty of the fluid orally, dry wet laundry indoors, or use other methods to keep indoor humidity at about 60% to prevent dehydration.

You don’t even have to worry about getting dehydrated if you eat as usual while you have a cold.

 

 

 

48. Should children drink cow milk every day?………349

Do children have to eat cow milk every day in order to grow and develop normally, or is it not necessary to drink cow milk?

We continue to argue over this issue.

Perhaps the debate continues for several reasons.

For about many years, a written survey of “How should I love and raise children?” was conducted at a Korean-American church in the United States, a Korean university, and a pediatric clinic.

At that time, the following 23 questions and answers were conducted on 100 Korean adults who attended to Korean-American church and Korean children’s parents who came to my office for medical treatment for theier children.

‘Do children have to drink cow milk?’ 

A. 

① 79% of people must eat, 

② 15% of not have to eat, 

③ 6% were not sure.

Why do you think children must drink milk’? 

·         92% for calcium intake, 

·         To grow well and grow healthy, 4%, 

·         1% because milk fat is needed, 

·          1% because it is good in all respects, 

·          1% because of good nutrition supply 

·          1% because it was a food containing a lot of vitamins. 

Parents’ answers make sense and are correct. 

However, there is also an opposite theory, which will be introduced next.

 

Photo 157. Milk or food made from cow milk 

Cow’s milk can cause allergy. 

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP 

A few years ago, the author wrote an article in the local newspaper, The Chronicle in English saying that children don’t necessarily have to drink cow’s milk.

As expected, some nutritionists in the town here wrote several articles against my opinion on cow milk in the newspaper, saying how can children grow and develop if they don’t eat cow milk, and where can they get calcium if they don’t drink cow milk.

In addition, there was an opinion that the content of “children don’t necessarily have to drink cow milk” in my contribution was not correct. Of course, I admitted that their argument made sense.

 

Picture 156. Cow milk and foods containing cow’s milk have nutritive value, but some children can have several types of cow’s milk allergies. 

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP 

There were also many local doctors in town who agreed with the content of my contributions and also many non-medical workers.

I did not continue the argument.

Not long ago, a mother brought her child to my pediatric office and told a medical story about her child suffering from cow milk intake, and asked what it would be like to eat cow milk while eating Lactaid, which treats lactose intolerance for life, and the child suffered from cow milk in the past.

“As soon as I and my family came to the United States in 1968, my child had to drink 3 cups of cow milk a day like a cool cola drink because cow milk was thought to be good for the body and very good for growing children.

If she said her child didn’t want to eat, she sweetened it with sugar and made her drink.

After that, the child suffered a lot for years with symptoms such as diarrhea, abdominal pain, farting, and bloating without any reason.

She took antacids such as Tums and Maalox whenever she was sick, and she went to her doctor and then to the other doctor. After eating spicy kimchi and red pepper paste, her mother was suspicious that she could not digest it, so she switched from Korean style foods to Western-style food.

Finally, when she went to a pediatric gastroenterologist, she was diagnosed with a disease called lactose intolerance caused by a lactase enzyme deficiency.

From then on, she said she would not drink a drop of cow milk.”

Dr. Benjamin Spocks, a pediatrician who became world sensational author of Dr. Spock’s Baby & Child Care for the first time in the United States and around the world in 1946, said “Children after the age of 2 years old do not need to feed cow milk if children eat the balance diets.

After that, the American Academy of Pediatrics refuted his claim, saying, “Dr. Spocks is the leading cause of the pediatric nutritional riot.”

Thus, the cow milk dispute ended with another round.

After that, there was another big controversy over cow milk.

New York Mayor, Rudy Giuliani, who had a white mustache, said “advertisement of prostate cancer due to cow milk,” and his photographs appeared on billboards. After that, he tried to set to sue PETA, which made an advertisement.

After then the cow milk drink controversy front finally arrived at Dr. Benjamin Spokes’ hometown in New Haven, Connecticut, USA.’ Cow Milk can cause infant colic, diabetes, obesity, ear problems, allergies, and many more diseases in children’.

And on a large billboard with a picture of a baby’s lips smeared with white milk, news about cow milk appeared in a local newspaper in Hartford, Connecticut, where I live.

Is cow milk a really good food for growing children, or whether cow milk can be a harmful food for them, and all parents need to find out whether cow milk must be fed to their growing children?

Lactose intolerance, milk allergy, galactosemia, constipation, anemia, vitamin deficiency, obesity, diabetes, hyperactivity disorder, attention deficit, etc., and various illnesses and symptoms can be caused by cow milk intake, and if you eat a lot of cow milk, children may take the protein, carbohydrates, or other types of nutrients from mainly consumed cow milk, you can no longer eat other types of foods other than cow milk, which can lead to various nutritional deficiencies.

Because cow milk does not contain enough iron and vitamins C and D as necessary for growth and development, children who drink a lot of cow milk cannot get enough iron from cow milk, which can lead to iron deficiency anemia and vitamin C or D deficiency.

Children who eat cow milk-based ice cream or milkshakes are more likely to develop irritable gastrointestinal syndrome, which can lead to stomach aches and symptoms of gastrointestinal diseases such as diarrhea.

Also, constipation can occur due to cow milk consumption.

Migraine, hyperactivity disorder and/or attention deficit disorder, allergic conjunctivitis, allergic rhinitis, allergic sinusitis, bronchial asthma, allergic gastroenteritis, and resulting intestinal bleeding and mucous stool, green stool, blood stool, hematuria, anemia, etc. may be caused by cows milk drink.

Symptoms such as diarrhea, abdominal pain, abdominal distension, and fart occur, and cow milk allergy such as growing pain, muscle pain, tension fatigue syndrome, atopic dermatitis, hives, and shock can occur in 0.5 to 2% of cow milk drinkers.

It is normal that lactose in cow milk is decomposed into glucose and galactose by the lactose enzyme secreted from the mucous membrane of the small intestine, and then the glucose and galactose are absorbed into the blood through the intestinal mucosa.

Drinking cow milk can lead to lactose intolerance in children who do not secrete enough lactase enzymes or those who secrete very little.

Lactase enzymes begin to be secreted from the intestinal mucosa before birth and are secreted very vigorously as soon as they are born, and it is common to normally digest lactose contained in breast milk or artificial nutrition.

It is common for most infants to naturally decrease the secretion of lactase enzymes in their intestinal mucosa before they reach 3-4 years old of age.

If children who do not secrete lactase enzymes eat cow milk or foods containing cow milk, lactose is not digested, and the lactose is decayed by a group of bacteria in the small and large intestines while the lactose descends into the small and large intestine.

When cow milk decays, gasses such as lactic acid, organic acids, and hydrogen are produced, which can lead to symptoms such as bloating, abdominal pain, and diarrhea.

Lactase enzyme deficiency (lactose intolerance) can be congenital or acquired, but congenital lactase enzyme deficiency is a very rare disease.

Secondary lactose intolerance may develop due to insufficient lactase enzyme secretion during or after suffering from pancreatic cystic fibroma, celiac disease, ulcerative colitis, gastrointestinal resection surgery, viral gastroenteritis, bacterial gastroenteritis, or drug-induced gastroenteritis..

Secondary lactose intolerance is caused by viral gastroenteritis, bacterial gastroenteritis, or drug gastroenteritis, and lactose intolerance will naturally heal if the lactase enzyme secretion returns to normal after the gastroenteritis is cleared.

When the secretion of lactase enzymes is temporarily reduced, avoiding cow milk or foods containing cow milk is the ideal treatment.

When children are consumed, about 240cc of milk a day, it may not cause much trouble when there is no abnormality in the gastrointestinal tract, if a small amount of lactase enzyme is secreted or if children with little or no secretion of lactase,  it may not cause much trouble.

60-96% of blacks, Jews, whites living in the Mediterranean, Asians, and 20% of white Americans secrete little or no lactase enzymes in the mucous membrane of the small intestine. Eating cow milk containing healthy foods can lead to lactose intolerance.

Most of the white Western parents have a long time ago believed that feeding their growing young children at least three cups of cow milk a day would make them bigger and stronger bones and good teeth.

It is true that since 1915, when the electric refrigerator was invented, cow milk storage became easier, it was believed that children must eat cow milk, and the child-raising diet exercise was further encouraged.

And even now, there are many white Western parents who believe that.

In addition, since almost a century ago, white mothers in various countries in Europe fed their babies entirely for several months after birth, and nowadays, quite a few mothers are raising newborn infants through artificial nutrition instead of breastfeeding.

Members of the American Academy of Pediatrics Allergy and Asthma Division members also have agreed runny nose, wheezing, asthma, otitis media, headache, muscle pain, chronic sinusitis, diabetes,  fatigue syndrome, infant colic, atopic dermatitis, urticaria may be caused by cow milk protein. It has been reported that a high intake of cow milk may lead to more coronary artery occlusive heart disease and obesity due to saturated fat and cholesterol in milk.

Infants need 500-600mg, children aged 10-15 years old, 600-700mg, and adults 400-800mg of calcium every day. If children eat enough cow milk, children can get enough calcium from cow milk intake. Eating just a balanced diet can help children get enough of the calcium they need every day.

Children who eat a lot of cow milk can also develop tooth decay and tooth enamel abnormalities, the Journal of Pediatrics reported.

In addition, Oskie, a professor of pediatrics at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine, argued that many American children suffer from milk allergies.

Cow milk can be good food for children who are not allergic to milk and are lactose-intolerant if they eat cow milk and milk-containing foods properly every day.

In children who do not, cow milk intake can cause a number of health problems.

That is why it is necessary to reconsider the notion that children must drink cow milk.

When feeding your children with cow milk, you should watch out for health problems caused by cow milk.

 It is said that foods that are good for the Korean people in the Han Dynasty are selected through three generations.

Let foods to be the best medicine.

The following is an example of an internet pediatric and adolescent health counseling question and answer on “Please tell me about food refusal and childhood anemia”.

Q&A. Please tell me about food rejection and childhood anemia.

Q. Hello sir

This is a 30-month-old baby boy. Originally, he doesn’t eat a lot of cow milk or food, but he ate mostly cow milk up to 2 months ago, and nowadays I feed 3 meals and feed cow milk and fruits (juice, cheese, etc.).  If he does not try to eat it, and I put a spoonful of rice, he will feel sick.

I’m worried because he has constipation because he does not eat it.

I am worried if there is a serious problem with his nutritional status. I am worried and curious about how my child will eat well and gain weight like other children. Please help!

A. Dear Ji-ae

Hello. Thanks for the great question.

The more information you know about your child’s age, gender, past medical history, family medical history, medical examination findings, clinical examination, etc., the more helpful it is to give you a better answer. I will respond based on the information you provided.

Infants of this age are required to eat the meals which their parents eat.

And you must train and encourage your child to eat foods with a spoon, a cup or a hand.

If possible, let the child eat himself with a spoon, the cup, or the hand.

Parents should not spoon-feed.

Children are independent human beings, and parents can love and care for them, but not own them.

Young children continue to seek independence from their parents at that age.

It is very important to train you to pursue independence little by little and gradually.

It’s easy for all of our parents to make a possessive love for their children by mistake.

You shouldn’t make possessive love of your children as you own them.

Cow milk is not a balanced diet.

Therefore, he can eat at least 3 meals a day and eat other snacks.

In the United States, it is said that a child can eat 1 to 3 cups of cow milk a day, but this applies to children who eat cow milk and do not develop lactose intolerance and do not develop cow milk allergies.

If your children eat large amounts of cow milk, they can’t afford to eat other essential foods because your child consumes most of the nutrients and energy they need each day, such as protein, fat, and carbohydrates, from the cow milk they eat every day.

So naturally, they don’t eat anything other than cow milk.

Drinking a lot of cow milk can lead to anemia because the cow milk component does not contain enough iron.

When your child is hungry, have them eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner  3 meals with the family, and give them snacks twice a day.

According to the growth chart, the child’s weight is in 5 percentiles. Check out the growth chart to see what percentile of the growth chart you have followed from birth to the present.

If your child’s weight and height are growing along a growth chart percentile curve, you can think that the child’s current weight is normal. Each child’s growth rate is innately determined. It is almost impossible to change the innate rate of growth, and neither the parent nor the child himself can change it. In other words, the child must grow up according to the child’s growth percentile in weight and height.

When they receive regular health check-ups at the  Pediatric office, you should also take a urine test, an anemia test, and consult about these problems.

Also, please consult with the pediatrician after receiving medical examination treatment. If you have more questions, please contact us again. Thank you. Lee Sang-won, MD

Copyright ⓒ 2014 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

49. Hundreds questions and hundreds answers on asthma(bronchial ashtma)……356

 

 

Figure 6~1. Illustration of cross-section and longitudinal section of the airway when an asthma attack is triggered.

 

larynx, b-trachea, c-bronchi, d-bronchiole (capillary bronchi), e-smooth muscle, f-alveoli, g-capillary wall, h-airway secretion (sputum)

 

Physical exercise or other types of asthma attack triggers can cause airway constriction and blockage.

At this time, treatment with bronchodilators can make the airways to return normally.

When airway infections may trigger asthma attack and then the airways may be swollen, but few asthma symptoms may develop and sometimes no signs of asthma symptoms.

If an asthma attack is already triggered by an asthma trigger such as airway infection, and exposure, another asthma attack trigger can lead to more severe airway inflammation, more swelling of the airways, increased mucus secretion, and consequently more obstruction of the airways.  Used with permission from Hardy 1992

 

2. Normal low respiratory tract and lungs

 

Figure 161. a-larynx, b-trachia, c-bronchus, d-bronchiole. Source: Used with permission from Hardy 1992

 

3. Normal airway

 

Figure 162. Cross-section and longitudinal section of a normal low respiratory airway

 

a-capillary bronchi (bronchioles), b-alveoli. Source: Used with permission from Hardy 1992

 

4. Airway constriction caused by mild asthma

 

Figure 163. ① Normal bronchiole cross section and longitudinal section

 

② When a mild persistent asthma attack occurs, the bronchi and bronchioles contract and the airway narrows.

 

Source: Used with permission from Hardy 1992

 

5. Airway constriction caused by severe asthma

Figure 164. Cross-section and longitudinal section of airway with persistent asthma.

 

With moderate persistent asthma, the bronchi and bronchioles contracted and sputum was secreted in the airways .

 

Severe persistent asthma caused severe constriction of the bronchi and bronchioles, sputum secreted in the airways, and swelling of the airway walls (pictured below)

Source: Used with permission from Hardy 1992

 

6. Airway constriction caused by mild asthma attacks

 

Figure 6-6. Normal bronchiole transverse and longitudinal sectional view

 

 When a mild persistent asthma attack is triggered, the bronchi and bronchioles contract, resulting in narrowing of the airways (left and right a). Source: Used with permission from Hardy 1992

 

7. Mild asthma attack

 

 

Figure 6~7. A cross-sectional view of the airway that triggered an asthma attack.

 

③ When a moderate persistent asthma attack is triggered, the bronchi and bronchioles partially contract more, the inside of the airway becomes narrower, and the inner wall of the airway becomes more swollen.

 

④ When a severe persistent asthma attack is triggered, the airways in the bronchi and bronchioles become more constricted and the inside of the airways becomes narrower, the inner wall of the airways becomes swollen, and the inflammation becomes more severe.

 

8. Mechanism of asthma attack

 

 

Figure 6-8. Airway change and cross-sectional drawing of airway when an asthma attack is triggered

 

a-normal airway (bronchi),

 

b-acute bronchoconstriction,

 

c-chronic asthma constriction of the airways and inflammation of the walls of the bronchi, making the airways narrower,

 

D-subacute asthma or chronic asthma caused the bronchial wall to swell and become inflamed, resulting in a narrower airway.

 

e-inflammatory cells, histamine granules are secreted from m-mast cells.

 

T cells,

 

B cells,

 

p alveolar macrophages,

 

o Various mediators such as histamine, cytokines, leukotrienes, prostaglandins, etc., which are produced by activation of eosinophils and neutrophils, etc., are formed, which can cause asthma attacks.

 

MBP; Major basophil cytotoxic enzyme (basophil/Major basophilic protein) is secreted

 

PAF: Platelet-activating factor (PAF) Reference-Asthma, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, December 1992, W. B. Saunders

 

 

Here are some questions about asthma.

 

If correct, answer “yes”, if wrong, answer “no”, and refer to the hundred questions and answers for the answer to that.

 

1. Childhood asthma is a common disease.

 

1. Yes

 

1. Asthma is a disease that is mainly caused by emotional or mental problems.

 

1. No

 

1. Asthma develops when parents raise their children incorrectly.

 

1. No

 

Q.When a severe persistent asthma attack is triggered acutely and breathing difficulties occur, it can be dangerous to life if not properly treated.

 

1. Yes

 

1. Without any prognostic symptoms, an asthma attack can be triggered suddenly.

 

1. Yes

 

1. There is no treatment method that can cure asthma yet, but there are preventive treatment methods that can prevent the recurrence of asthma attacks. And whenever an asthma attack is triggered, there are many treatment options that can be treated.

 

1. Yes

 

1. There are several types of asthma medications used to treat asthma.

 

1. Yes

 

1. During asthma treatment, measuring the peak expiratory flow rate (PEFR) can indicate good asthma control.

 

1. Yes

 

1. Newborns and infants can also develop asthma.

 

1. Yes

 

1. Smoking can lead to asthma attacks.

 

1. Yes

 

1. Children with physical-exercise induced asthma should not exercise physically.

 

1. No

 

1. A “personal asthma diary” written about the symptoms and treatment of asthma is very helpful in treating asthma.

 

1. Yes

 

1. Can you treat asthma more effectively if you study about asthma a lot by getting asthma

information about asthma attack triggers, diagnosis, treatment, and prevention from a doctor,

and write a “patient asthma diary” to treat asthma?

• What triggers an asthma attack
• Asthma symptoms, signs and severity can be identified
• How to treat them depending on the severity of those symptoms
• How to prevent asthma attacks from triggering
• Why measure peak expiratory outflow rates daily with a peak flow meter (maximum flow meter)?
• Types and pharmacological actions of drugs that can be used to treat asthma
• When, how much, and how to use asthma medications to treat asthma
• What are the side effects of asthma medication,
• How to deal with such side effects
• What to do when your asthma becomes more severe
• etc

A regular pediatrician writes about the asthma treatment method and gives it to the patient, mother, father, or guardian,  and patient are treated according to the doctor’s instructions. Write down the journal and review the diary with a regular pediatrician, patient, mother, father, or guardian to treat asthma in order to effectively treat asthma.

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends the treatment of childhood asthma.

References; New asthma guidelines, Journal watch pediatrics and adolescent medicine. vol 6, number 12. 12/2007

 

1. How common is childhood asthma? About asthma statistics?

 

• Asthma in children and adolescents is called childhood asthma.
• Depending on the study and the country in which you live, your asthma statistics differ.
• In the US, 10-15% of children and adolescents (ages 0-18) suffer from asthma.
• Among the chronic respiratory diseases in children and adolescents, the most common chronic respiratory disease is asthma.
• People of all ages, regardless of country, race, gender, or age, can develop asthma.
• Eight to 12% of people of all ages in the United States have asthma.
• A total of 14 million people in the United States have asthma.
• 10-15% of American boys suffer from asthma.
• 7 to 10% of  girls in US have asthma.
• 1 in 4 infants and younger children under the age of 5 have asthma
• This is one of the most common reasons why children and adolescents are treated by visiting hospital emergency rooms.
• Asthma can be a serious health problem for children and adolescents.
• School-age children are absent for 5 to 7 days a year due to asthma in the US
• Medical expenses of about $600 million a year
• More than 500 people die annually.
• In Korea, 1 in 4 infants aged 5 yers old  or younger suffers from asthma. It is almost the same as the statistics in the United States (recently reported by the Korean Asthma Allergy Association).

1. Is Asthma a type of emotional disorder or mental illness.

 

1. Although asthma is neither an emotional disorder nor a mental illness, it may be more prone to asthma attacks in children and adolescents with mental and emotional problems such as depression, tension, anxiety, or stress.

 

In children with such mental problems, if an asthma attack is triggered, the symptoms may be worse and the asthma may not be treated well.

 

1. Why do some children have asthma and some do not have asthma?

 

1. Some children and adolescents with asthma are born with genetic factors that can cause asthma.

 

It is common for children with intermittent asthma to grow up and do their daily routine just as well as other children without asthma, with no signs of asthma, while no signs of asthma are present.

 

When children born with asthma genetic factors come into contact with asthma triggers or antigens, asthma attacks are triggered and symptoms of asthma appear.

 

1. If parents raise their children incorrectly, can their children have asthma attacks?

 

1. Asthma attacks may occur in children more often when parents are anxious, stressed, or smoking, but this is not necessarily the case.

 

Asthma attacks are more prone to children and adolescents in the house when is dirty or when a lot of house dust mites are grown, when pets such as dogs and cats are kept in the house, or when eating any food that can cause allergic diseases.

 

1. Can life be at risk from asthma

 

1. Symptoms of asthma depending on the severity of symptoms and many other conditions, asthma can be divided into intermittent asthma, mild persistent asthma, moderate persistent asthma, and severe persistent asthma.

 

In addition, there are acute asthma caused by acute asthma attack, and there are chronic asthma suffering from chronic conditions.

 

The author has experience in treating children and adolescents suffering from asthma for decades, but has not yet seen a child or adolescent who has died from asthma.

 

When a moderate or severe persistent asthma attack is triggered suddenly and severely, or persistent asthma (moderate asthma) If asthma is not properly treated, it can be life threatening and can lead to death. In the United States, more than 500 people die annually from asthma.

 

1. Can asthma interfere with study at school?

 

1. American students are absent from school for 5 to 7 days a year due to asthma, and some students are unable to exercise physically with other students during school physical education.

 

However, most of the children with asthma can do school sports and school life normally.

 

1. What signs of asthma can predict before an acute asthma attack is triggered?

 

1. Before an asthma attack is triggered acutely, it is common for no obvious signs to predict that an asthma attack will be triggered.

You may cough a little just before the acute asthma attack is triggered, you may have itchy throat.

Signs of symptoms such as tightness in the chest and difficulty breathing may develop.

These symptoms can be considered the first symptoms of an asthma attack.

These symptoms can appear before an acute asthma attack.

However, even if infants and toddlers have symptoms similar to those of asthma, they may not complain such symptoms.

School-age children or adolescence may complain of the previously described asthma symptoms just before the acute asthma attack .

When symptoms similar to those of asthma may occur before the acute asthma attack is  triggered, appropriate treatment with asthma medications may stop the futher  asthma attack or only  mild asthma attack experience.

 

1. Do children with intermittent asthma always have signs of symptoms of asthma?

 

1. Children with a past history of asthma attacks caused by intermittent asthma attacks do not cough, wheeze and breathe, do not wheeze, do not breathe shortly, as long as the asthma attack is not triggered again. It is common for normal children without asthma to work and grow in the same way they normally do.

 

If you suffer from an asthma attack that doesn’t trigger, there are usually no signs of asthma symptoms.

 

1. What are the triggers of an asthma attack

 

1. If any of the siblings of the biological parents have atopic dermatitis, allergic rhinitis, food allergy, asthma, drug allergy, poison ivy contact dermatitis, insect allergy, or other allergic diseases, Siblings in the household are very likely to develop allergic diseases such as asthma, allergic rhinitis, or atopic dermatitis. Thus, asthma is a type of genetic disease.

 

 Picture 168. Asthma is a hereditary disease.

 

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

2. Physical exercise such as swimming, or running can trigger an asthma attack. Such an asthma attack caused by physical exercise is called physical exercise-induced asthma, or exercise-induced asthma.

 

 

Picture 169. Physical exercise can trigger an asthma attack.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

 

Picture 170. Physical exercise can trigger an asthma attack.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

3. Cold, viral upper respiratory tract infection, viral lower respiratory tract infection, and other viral infectious diseases can induce asthma attacks.

Asthma caused by viral upper respiratory infections such as colds is called virus-induced asthma.

It is reported that 70% of infants with a history of acute bronchiolitis develop asthma attacks.

I don’t know for sure why.

 

 

 

Picture 171. Viral upper respiratory tract infection such as a cold or flu, or viral lower respiratory tract infection can cause asthma attacks. In general, bacterial upper and lower respiratory tract infections do not cause asthma attacks.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

 

Picture 172. Asthma attacks can occur while sleeping, which is called sleep-induced asthma or night sleep asthma.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD, FAAP

 

4. Cigarette smoke, smoke from factory chimneys, automobile exhaust gas, polluted air, gasoline, paint, odors and vapors from volatile chemicals, toxic gases, perfumes, cosmetics, or cleaning chemicals can cause asthma attacks. This is not allergic asthma.

 

 

Picture 173. Direct or second-hand smoke can trigger an asthma attack.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

Picture 174. Some types of drugs, such as aspirin, can trigger an asthma attack.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

5. Aspirin, vaccine, penicillin, anesthetics, or other drugs can cause asthma attacks.
6. Food ingredients such as cow milk, eggs, nuts, peanuts, chocolate, fish, flour, or food

    additives  and artificial food coloring can trigger asthma attacks.Cold air, changes in temperature, or humidity can trigger asthma attacks.  Asthma iduced  by cold air is called cold-induced asthma.

 

 

 

Photo 175. Cold air, changes in temperature, or changes in humidity can trigger an asthma attack.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

7. Dogs, cats, bird hair, dandruff, saliva, urine can cause asthma attacks. Pillows or blankets made of animal hair or bird feathers can trigger asthma attacks. Sleeping on that type of pillow, especially when sleeping, can trigger nighttime asthma attacks.

 

 

Photo 176. Dog hair, dandruff, and saliva can trigger asthma attacks.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

 

 

Photo 177. Cat hair, dandruff, and saliva can cause asthma attacks.

 

Copyrightⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

8. Asthma attacks can be caused by molds and/or fungus such as Alternaria.

 

 

Phto 178. Mold or fungus that grows inside and outside the home can trigger an asthma attack.

 

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD.FAAP

 

Photo 179. House dust or house dust mites , house mold can trigger an asthma attack.

 

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., TT FAAP

 

10. Pollen from trees or grass, especially ragweed pollen, can cause asthma attacks.

 

Phto 180. Plant pollen can also trigger asthma attacks.

 

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

Photo 181. Plant pollen can also trigger asthma attacks.

 

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

11. House dust, house dust mites or cockroaches can cause asthma attacks.

 

 

Photo 323. Closeup of a house dust mite.

 

House dust mites are arthropods measuring 3 mm in size.

 

sauce; www.gazoontite.com

 

 

Photo 183. Cockroaches can trigger asthma attacks.

 

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

12. Gastroesophageal reflux can cause asthma attacks.

Artificial nutrition, breast milk, or other types of food eaten by infants and toddlers can reflux from the stomach into the esophagus. Such gastroesophageal reflux can trigger asthma attacks.

 

 Figure 184. Gastroesophageal reflux can lead to asthma attacks

 

a-Gastroesophageal reflux (left), no gastroesophageal reflux (right), b-gstroesophageal sphinter, c-gas and gastric contents, d-duodenum, e-pylorus, g-gasoesophageal reflux

 

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

 

13. Bronchial asthma attacks can be triggered by discord and conflict between parents, siblings, conflicts between friends and peers, stress, or mental anxiety.
14. Asthma is more likely to be induced in children who have not grown up with their mother breast milk.

source; Contemporary pediatrics, January 2009. p.16.

 

15. Other triggers can also trigger asthma attacks.

 

1. Factors that trigger asthma attacks are called asthma triggers. It has asthma predisposition factors that can cause asthma from birth.

 

If List the factors that cause asthma

 

• Viruses such as cold virus or flu virus that can cause upper and lower respiratory tract infectious diseases,

 

• Tree or weed pollen,

 

• Mold, fungus,

 

• House dust mites , house dust,

 

• Cockroach,

 

• Change of wheather,

 

• Exposure to cold air,

 

• Organic or inorganic chemicals,

 

• Cigarette smoke,

 

• Animal fur, dandruff and saliva, feathers

 

• Food such as cow milk, nuts, eggs,

 

• Anger or stress,

 

• Changes in emotions such as laughter or crying,

 

• Physical exercise,

 

• Drugs such as aspirin,

 

• Gastroesophageal reflux

 

• etc

 

All of the factors that can induce asthma attacks are called asthma attack triggers.

 

When children and adolescents with asthma predisposition, that is, genetic factors, encounter asthma attack triggers, asthma attacks can be triggered in children and adolescents.

 

1. Can asthma be cured?

 

1. There is no cure for asthma yet.

 

However, there are many treatment methods and asthma medications that can well treat symptoms such as cough, wheezing, shortness of breath, and difficulty breathing that occur when an asthma attack is triggered.

 

It is possible to use the phrase “to cure asthma”, but many literature uses the term “asthma control” instead of asthma cure treatment.

 

If you control your asthma well, you can live healthy like people without asthma.

 

1. Is there any way to prevent asthma attacks from triggering?

 

1. There are several preventive measures that can be prevented from triggering an asthma attack.

 

There are also ways to prevent asthma by avoiding or eliminating triggers that may trigger asthma attacks, so that you are no longer exposed to asthma triggers.

 

There is also a way to prevent asthma attacks from triggering with drugs to prevent asthma attacks, such as sodium cromolyn.

 

However, there is still no way to completely prevent asthma from triggering an asthma attack.

 

1. Why parents of children and adolescents with asthma have to study a lot about asthma attack mechanisms, asthma triggers, prevention, treatment, etc.

 

1. They said that “Parents education is the best medicine”.

 

Parental education is the best treatment, and prevention.

 

In particular, parents need to study a lot about asthma.

 

When treating asthma, asthma can be treated more effectively if parents, children,  doctors, nurses, school authorities, hospitals, the state and society all become members of one asthma treatment team and treat them together. .

 

If parents or their children have a current or past asthma history, they should study a lot about what asthma is, causes, triggers, symptoms, diagnosis, treatment, and prevention. In particular, Parents need to study more about the treatment and prevention of asthma.

 

When asthma attacks are acutely induced in children and adolescents, parents should also be familiar with how to treat acutely induced asthma attacks at home as the primary emergency treatment.

 

It is the responsibility and duty of parents to know what triggers an asthma attack, and to prevent the asthma attack from occurring any more by treating the child so that it does not come into contact with the trigger again.

 

Depending on the severity of asthma, parents should know how to treat asthma immediately, and also children and adolescents themselves should know well about the treatment of asthma.

 

Many parents gain more knowledge about asthma through the Internet or in special books for asthma, so they have more knowledge of asthma medicine than doctors.

 

1. What asthma medications can be used to treat asthma

 

1. The treatment of asthma can be as follows.

 

A bronchodilator that can dilate the narrowed bronchi (airways) in an asthma attack.

 

Anti-inflammatory drugs  that can reduce inflammation of the bronchi caused by an asthma attack.

 

Asthma prevention drugs that can be used to prevent asthma attacks from triggering any more.

 

Bronchodilators include short-time effective bronchodilators that can expand the bronchi in a short time.

 

There are also long-effect bronchodilators that can dilate the norrowing bronchi for a long time.

 

Bronchodilators include oral syrup, pills, capsules, aerosol HFA for inhalation, and aerosol for inhalation.

 

Anti-inflammatory drugs include oral syrup and tablets, dry powder aerosol HFA for inhalation, and aerosol for inhalation spray.

 

Drugs that can be used for prophylaxis to prevent further asthma attacks include oral syrup and pills, inhaled gun powder aerosol HFA, and inhaled aerosol spray.

 

1. Is there a device that can measure the maximum expiratory outflow flow rate that can measured to measue the peak expiratory outflow rate (PEFR) of children with asthma at home?

 

1. Peak flow meter makes it easy to measure the maximum expiratory flow rate (PEFR) at home, at school, or in a hospital.

 

Before an asthma attack is triggered, the maximum expiratory outflow rate is measured with a maximum flow meter in a condition that the asthma attack is not triggered and there are no symptoms of asthma.

 

The major drawback is that some of the children are immature and do not know exactly how to check the maximum expiratory outflow rate with a maximum flow meter, so that this test cannot be done properly. The downside is that some adults and adolescents don’t know how to properly measure the maximum expiratory flow rate, so no one can use this test.

 

Pulmonary function can be measured with a spirometer in a pediatric and adolescent clinic or in a hospital emergency room.

 

1. Can children with a past history of asthma as a child develop asthma after they become adults?

 

1. It is common for the majority of children born with asthma predisposition to develop asthma attacks before they reach adulthood, leading to asthma attacks in their adulthood.

 

Children and adolescents with a history of asthma in childhood may no longer develop asthma attacks and may lead to more severe asthma attacks after they grow up and become adults.

 

Children who have never had an asthma attack in childhood may have an asthma attack for the first time since they become adults.

 

It is common for most adults with a history of childhood asthma to develop asthma even after adulthood.

 

Most first asthma attacks are usually triggered before the first birthday, but the first asthma attack may occur after adulthood.

 

1. Can Smoking stimulate ther airway, and may cause asthma attacks?

 

1. Your own smoking can trigger an asthma attack, and you don’t smoke, but smoking around you, that is, secondary smoking, stimulates your airways, which can trigger an asthma attack. This is not an allergic asthma attack.

 

1. Can contaminated air trigger an asthma attack?

 

1. Fireplace smoke, outdoor smoke, or contaminated air can trigger an asthma attack.

 

If children with mild persistent asthma smoke, breathing smoke, or contaminated air trigger the mild persistent asthma and they have suffered may worsen into moderate or severe persistent asthma, and chronic asthma worsens to acute asthma. And acute asthma can progress to chronic asthma.

 

Smoking in a person with a history of asthma or a previous history of asthma can lead to acute asthma attacks, and mild persistent asthma may worsen, may leading to severe persistent asthma, resulting in loss of life.

 

1. My 13-year-old son has a history of intermittent asthma, but he is usually healthy, but when he does physical exercise, such as running or soccer, he said to be awkward and short of breath.

 

1. When healthy children without a history of asthma suffer from physical exercise such as running. If no physical exercise, they may be normal.

 

When children with a history of asthma in the past or present do physical exercise, such as running or soccer, there are times when they breathe more faster than usual, cough more than usual, and cannot continue the exercise properly. Physical exercise like this can trigger an asthma attack.

 

If a child without any symptoms of asthma begins physical exercise, it may start coughing and short of breath and tingle.

 

Peers who have no history of asthma and who do not suffer from asthma can continue to do such physical exercise normally to make the end. If a child with asthma begins physical exercise, an asthma attack can be triggered by physical exercise . There are times when you can’t continue. Asthma attacks during physical exercise is called physical exercise-induced asthma.

 

1. Is there a way to prevent physical exercise-induced asthma?

 

1. Physical exercise-induced asthma is a minor asthma attacks due to physical exercise, and most children are able to continue with the physical exercise.

 

Just because an asthma attack is triggered during physical exercise should not limit physical exercise. If do, they cannot do all of usual physical exercise which needed in their life.

 

It is not necessary for all children with a history of mild physical exercise-induced asthma to undergo routine preventive asthma treatment before starting exercise.

 

Physical exercise may induce physical exercise induced asthma in many occations . When children and adolescents who have severe asthma attacks during physical exercise must do  inhalation of beta 2 agonist aerosol HFA  2 or 3 times at 15 minutes before starting the exercise. Physical exercise-induced asthma can be somewhat prevented by inhaling cromolyn aerosol HFA or nebulized cromolyn spray 30-60 minutes before the start of exercise, or taking oral beta 2 agonist 30-60 minutes before the start of exercise.

 

Athletes who have a history of physical exercise-induced asthma may become international athletes. Olympic athletes also prevent exercise-induced asthma with this kind of asthma prophylactic treatment.

 

1. Can pregnancy trigger asthma attacks

 

1. Pregnancy can trigger asthma attacks.

 

So, asthma attacks during pregnancy is sometimes referred to as pregnancy-induced asthma.

 

If the asthma attack is severe during pregnancy, the pregnant woman may cough and breathe with shortness of breath, and wheezing.

 

Severe persistent or severe persistent asthma during pregnancy can be treated with inhaled corticosteroid aerosol HFA.

 

It is said that treatment with such an appropriate inhaled corticosteroid aerosol HFA does not cause any specific side effects to the fetus or pregnant woman.

 

If necessary, asthma can be treated during pregnancy with albuterol, a bronchodilator.

 

1. If parents have asthma, what is the probability that their children will have asthma?

 

1. If either one parent has a history of asthma in the past or present, the child born to both parents has a 25% chance of developing asthma,

 

If both parents have a history of asthma in the past or present, children born to both parents have a 50% chance of developing asthma.

 

1. Is there any way to prevent asthma in children born to two parents who currently have asthma or have a history of asthma in the past?

 

1. The triggers should be eliminated or avoided to avoid asthma attack triggers as much as possible so as not to trigger asthma attacks in children born to parents with a history of asthma.

 

From the newborn period, instead of feeding artificial nutrition, breastfeeding is performed.  Breastfeeding can be continued untill at least 9-12 months old.

 

Or, Breastfeeding for longer than 9 months, and baby foods should not given  before 6 months of age.

 

Do not feed if possible allergic foods, such as cow milk, eggs, nuts, chocolate, etc. that can cause food allergies.

 

Clean the house environment control and cleaning to prevent the growth of house dust mites and fungus.

 

Wrap your mattresses well with plastic covers,

 

Do not keep pets, such as dogs and cats, in the house,

Do not smoke,

Use wooden hardwood floors instead of fastening carpets,

 

Eat a balanced diet,

 

Regular exercise and good health care can lead to fewer asthma attacks.

 

1. My 5 month old son had atopic dermatitis on his face and the neck, and after applying corticosteroid ointment according to the doctor’s instructions, the dermatitis completely healed but recurred a few weeks later. However, if he catch a cold, the cold lasts more than 10 days. Why is that?

 

1. When children with atopic constitution or a history of asthma catch a cold, it is easy to induce asthma attacks. At this time, it can be misdiagnosed as coughing from asthma or coughing from cold.

 

Unless treated with bronchial asthma medications, it is common to cough day and night for 2-3 weeks. Sometimes when he breathe, you may hear wheezing breathing sound in his chest, he may have wheezing, and atopic dermatitis may recur.

 

1. Are atopic dermatitis and asthma related?

 

1. Asthma and atopic dermatitis are a type of hereditary allergic disease.

 

It is common for 70% of children with atopic dermatitis to have an asthma attack.

 

Most children with a history of asthma usually have both atopic dermatitis and allergic rhinitis.

 

It is nothing wrong to presume that children with atopic dermatitis in their past or current medical history will have asthma attacks sometime in the future and will have asthma again.

 

Children with a past or current history of allergic rhinitis are also very likely to develop asthma.

 

1. What is allergy shinner

 

1. After 1 to 2 days of bruising cause by physical contusion trauma on the face, the color of the skin can be turned darkish.

The skin color change are referred to as shinners. Allergic shinners are referred to as “black skin spots under the eyes”, “dark skin color circles under the eyes” or “suborbital edema and cyanosis,” It is also called “hyperpigmentation under eye”.

 

In children and adults with allergic rhinitis, the color of the skin under the lower eyelid becomes darkish.

 

The venous blood vessels at the edge of the orbit under the eyes are narrowed due to an allergic reaction, so venous blood at the edge of the orbit does not circulate properly, and venous blood at the edge of the orbit accumulates more than usual in the venous blood vessels, resulting in an allergic shinner.

 

Allergic shinner does not appear in all children or adults with allergic rhinitis, but it is relatively common.

 

It is a sign of allergic rhinitis.

 

When there is an allergic rhinitis, the allergic shinner usually appears temporarily, and when the rhinitis is over, the shinner disappears naturally.

 

Allergic shinner is usually more pronounced if children catch a cold while suffering from allergic rhinitis and have both allergic rhinitis and cold, or if they are more tired for some other reason.

 

The majority of children who have atopic dermatitis, allergic rhinitis  and/ or asthma in the past or present, whether together  may have  allergic shinner

 

Photo : The allergic shinner at the left lower eye lid

 

1. My 9-month-old son coughs mainly at night. And for a few weeks, she runs a yellowish runny nose. His doctor said that when a child sleeps, a runny nose mucosa can flow into the nasopharyngeal airway in the back of the nasal cavity instead of flowing through the front nostrils, and that the runny nose mucosa flows into the pharyngeal airway in the throat and coughs due to the irritation. Is it true?

 

1. When children with colds, sinusitis, allergic rhinitis, or other upper respiratory tract infections are lying down, a runny nose srcretions usually flows into the nasopharynx.

 

If that runny nose srcretions  irritates his nasopharynx, he may cough.

 

In this case, it is common to have a mild cough and not to have a severe cough from the chest mixed with phlegm.

 

Most children with mild asthma may cough a little or no more during the day when they are physically active and behaving. But lying down at night can increase cough and make  asthma symptoms worse.

 

There are many misdiagnosed cases of coughing with night-induced asthma at night as coughing with a cold.

 

You may have a cold, sinusitis, allergic rhinitis, and asthma at the same time, and you may cough mainly at night.

 

1. What causes coughing?

 

1. Common causes of coughing are colds, sinusitis, allergic rhinitis, asthma, pneumonia, croup, and bronchiolitis.

 

Often, the cause of coughing is not known for certain.

 

Find out the cause of coughing and treat the cough according to the cause.

 

1. Is it true that long-term treatment of asthma with oral systemic corticosteroids can lead to life-threatening systemic side effects?

 

1. If treated with an oral systemic corticosteroid within 7 to 10 days duration, systemic side effects may not usually occur, but treatment with an oral systemic corticosteroid for a long period more than 7 to 10 days or more longer may cause the following side effects.

 

Obesity, g rowth retardation, cataract, infectious diseases that are critical to life and others.

 

Systemic side effects can occur from treatment with systemic corticosteroids such as osteoporosis.

 

Corticosteroids are important anti-inflammatory drugs that are indispensable for the treatment of severe asthma attacks. If oral systemic corticosteroids are used for less than  7 to 10 days, side effects rarely occur and should be used only when necessary according to a doctor’s prescription.

 

1. Systemic side effects occur when long-term asthma treatment with inhaled corticosteroid aerosol HFA

 

1. Side effects may occur, but minor.

 

It is common to not have a fever when you have asthma due to an asthma attack.

 

When complications such as a cold or other types of viral upper and lower respiratory tract infections, or other viral respiratory infections such as bronchiolitis or bacterial infections such as pneumonia and asthma occur simultaneously, fever due to an infectious disease occurs.

 

1. My 13-year-old teenage daughter has moderate persistent asthma. He was prescribed to treat inhaled albuterol HFA by inhaling it into the lower airways every 4 to 6 hours. But she does not know how to inhale albuterol HFA for inhalation. Please explain how to do inhalation therapy correctly.

 

1. There are many children and adults who are not sure how to treat asthma by inhaling albuterol aerosol HFA for inhalation. Read the instructions carefully before inhaling the aerosol medicine in the HFA canister and treating it. If you don’t know how to use it, learn exactly how to use it from a pharmacist or your doctor.

 

Before performing inhalation treatment, hold an inhalation aerosol HFA canister near your ear and shake it three times to mix the aerosol medicine in it well.

 

Listen carefully for the movement of the drug in the suction aerosol HFA canister as it shakes and check if the drug is still in the canister.

 

While holding the suction aerosol HFA canister mouth piece at a distance of 1~2cm from the your lips

 

 

 

Photo 248:  one kind albuterol inhation  canister

 

Hold the albuterol inhation canister such as photo 248, It can be inhale  i t about 1~2 cm distancee from the upper and lower lips, Push down the canister to make the medicine  inside the canister  to come out. patients must inhale the medicine from aerosol HFA canister  thru the suction hole where the medicine comes out

When the medicine in the suction aerosol HFA canister is sucked through the mouth and into the lower airways.

 

When operating the HFA as shown in photo 248 , the inhalation aerosol HFA should be immediately inhaled into the lower respiratory tract. The ejected inhalation aerosol HFA from the inhalation aerosol HFA canister run at a speed of 70 to 80 miles per hour.

 

When inhaling one dose each time, inhale once, and after 1 to 2 minutes, inhale 2 to 3 times. At this time, the time of activating the inhalation aerosol HFA canister by hand pressing and the time of inhaling into the airway must match.

 

As prescribed, dividing the amount of one serving two to three times and inhaling it, rinse your mouth with plain water.

 

As prescribed, inhale every 4-6 hours or 3-4 times a day.

 

Prior to inhalation therapy, frequently check the inhalation hole of the inhalation aerosol HFA canister from which the inhalation aerosol HFA drug is released. If the hole is clogged, the aerosol for inhalation in the HFA canister does not come out easily. If the hole seems to be clogged, it should be washed out with warm running water. (For reference, one hole is in the canister and the other hole is in the canister.)

 

Because of this complicated use, inhaled albuterol aerosol HFA treatment is sometimes not possible.

 

photo 248

 

1. Can inhalation medications come out of the mouth and nostrils, such as when cigarette smoke comes out of the mouth or nose when inhaled into the airways as prescribed for inhaled albuterol aerosol HFA? Even if you inhale as directed by your doctor. Can I inhale in other ways when receiving treatment using HFA for suction aerosol in the canister?

 

1. After inserting the Albuterol aerosol HFA canister for inhalation into the “Inhalation Device (Suction Chamber)

 

 

 

Photo 251 Inhalation Device (Suction Chamber)

 

 

 

Photo 251 Inhalation Device (Suction Chamber) with ventolin inhalation aerosol HFA

 

Asthma can be treated by inserting the inhaled albuterol aerosol contained in the inhalation aerosol HFA into the inhalation aero chamber and inhaling the inhalation drug contained in the inhalation aerosol HFA canister through a mouthpiece attached to the instrument.

 

Some adults and most children under 12 years of age have inhaled albuterol aerosol HFA as prescribed.

 

Even if I try to properly inhale albuterol aerosol HFA as prescribed,

I cannot properly inhale the aerosol medicine from albuterol aerosol HFA canister for inhalation aerosol.

 

Before starting treatment with inhalation aerosol HFA, learn from a doctor or pharmacist how to properly inhale and treat, then start inhalation therapy with inhalation aerosol HFA, or insert only the inhalation aerosol HFA canister into the inhalation aero chamber and then inhalation albuterol Asthma can be treated by inhaling aerosol HFA.

 

If these two methods cannot be used for inhalation treatment, asthma can be treated with nebulizer spray instead of inhaled aerosol HFA, or syrup asthma medicine or regular asthma medicine.

 

1. My 7-year-old son coughed, wheezing, and laboring breathed for a few days starting 3 months ago. Then he coughed almost the same and took him to the hospital, and he was diagnosed with asthma.

 

When he was treated with prescribed asthma medication, all of those symptoms disappeared. Two months later, he had asthma attack  again for several days, almost the same as before. When running around or running fast at home or at school, he coughed, had shortness of breath, and had a sore chest. Is there anything wrong with his heart?

 

1. He seemed to have intermittent asthma and exercise-induced asthma. A severe acute asthma attack can be triggered, causing symptoms such as coughing, shortness of breath, and wheezing when he has asthma. When he has intermittent asthma, he may not have any symptoms such as difficulty breathing or wheezing intermittently.

 

They may be coughing a little and a little sore when they breathe in one or both chests.

 

The chest pain may be caused by a heart abnormality, but it is very rare for children and adolescents.

 

If he has a history of asthma with cough, chest pain during physical exercise, the symptoms disappear when he stoped physical exercising, and physical exercise-induced asthma hurts your chest.

 

If there is no heart abnormality after a medical examination and if they are diagnosed with asthma pain, it is common for symptoms of asthma such as chest pain and cough to disappear after treatment with inhaled beta 2 agonist aerosol HFA.

 

If an asthma attack recurs when exercising afterwards, the symptoms may reappear.

 

If you do preventive treatment before starting exercise and start exercising, you will no longer develop exercise-induced asthma.

 

1. My 6-year-old daughter was diagnosed with intermittent asthma two weeks ago. A neighbor girl was taken to the hospital emergency room whenever an acute asthma attack was triggered. I’m worried that my daughter will suffer from such severe asthma.

 

1. Of course, it can.

 

Asthma is divided into intermittent asthma, mild persistent asthma, moderate persistent asthma, and severe persistent asthma aws mentioned before.

 

There is no easy and sure way to know what kind of asthma attack your child will have and how badly your child  will get sick or how long you will continue to get sick after an asthma attack is triggered.

 

Intermittent asthma is the most common type of asthma.

 

The girl next door seems to have had a moderate or persistent asthma attack.

 

Most children with a history of asthma who have had an intermittent asthma attack in the past will usually suffer from asthma attacks that have been triggered to about the same extent as they had in the past when the next asthma attack was triggered.

 

Your child is more likely to have asthma in the future by triggering an intermittent asthma attack in the future.

 

1. My 13-year-old son has a history of mild persistent asthma three years ago. He has been been coughing intermittently day and night in the last few days and not spitting out phlegm. When studying for a school test, he coughs more severely. He may breathe normally, and doesn’t produce a fever.

 

All physical examination could be normal, could my child  have mild nocturnal asthma or does he cough  becaue  nervous?

 

1. Anxiety or stress can trigger an asthma attack.

 

Most of the adolescent children can be stressed by problems with the opposite sex, problems with adolescent children between their peers, school problems, future problems, and personal problems.

 

Some children are more stressed and more stressed than others, Stress may cause frequent asthma attacks and stress can lead to frequent asthma.

 

He probably has asthma from a mild, persistent asthma attack triggered by stress.

 

1. Why does he have trouble breathing when he have asthma?

 

1. Difficulty breathing in asthma attack usually occurs, but not all the times.

 

When an asthma attack is triggered and he has asthma, his airways become contract and become to be narrow.

 

Different types of asthma have different degrees of airway contraction.

 

When an asthma attack occurs, the airways such as the bronchi and bronchioles are abnormally contracted and narrowed, the airways become inflamed, and the mucous membrane layer of the airways wall is swollen.

 

In addition, mucus is secreted from the mucous membrane into the airways, and when mucus fills the airways, the airways become narroweror partially blocked.

 

When the airway becomes abnormally narrow due to asthma, the inhaled air passes through the narrowed airway and is not sufficiently inhaled into the alveoli, and carbon dioxide generated in the body passes through the inside of the alveoli, passes through the narrowed airway, and exits the body normally into the air.

 

Because of that, he has to breathe more often than usual and the asthma can cause shortness of breath.

 

In other words, the air inhaled through the mouth and nasal cavity → the pharyngeal cavity → the larynx → the trachea → passes through the bronchi and bronchioles and enters the alveoli in the lung . The co2 with exhale air from the body will pass thru  as → going out of the airways through the nose (nasal) and the mouth occurs with each breath.

 

When an asthma attack is triggered and asthma occurs, the lower respiratory tract airway(the larynx, trachea, bronchi and bronchi, etc.) is narrowed, making it difficult to breathe in and out often in breathing difficulties.

 

During mild intermittent asthma, the airways may contract a little, resulting in little or no breathing difficulties.

 

1. What is wheezing and what is a stridor sound?

 

  A.When air in the alveoli comes out of the nasal cavity and oral cavity violently through the lower respiratory tract, such as constricted bronchioles, bronchi, and trachea for any reason, the breathing sound may be abnormal.

 

That abnormal breathing sound is called wheezing.

 

Wheezing from asthma is mainly occurred during exhalation.

 

Parts of the upper respiratory tract, such as the nasal and pharyngeal cavity can be narrowd due to allergic rhinitis and others.

When parts of the upper respiratory tract, such as the nasal cavity and pharyngeal cavity, become narrow, a snoring sound may be heard in sleeping, and when a part of the larynx is partially blocked, a rattling sound of inspiratory stricture, like the sound of a dog barking, stridor sunds may occur.

 

If the bronchi and bronchiol are narrowed due to asthma, exalation wheezing, such as a mild wheezing sound or a fine whistling sound, may occur.

 

Most of the wheezing sound is about the same size on both sides of the chests, but sometimes it can only heard on one chest only.

 

Wheezing is so loud that the person next to you can hear it with their bare ears, and sometimes it is so small that it can only be heard when a doctor listens carefully with a stethoscope.

 

Sometimes, exalaion wheezing can occur only when breathing hard, such as when exercising.

 

When wheezing occurs, it is common to have difficulty breathing.

 

1. A 16-year-old daughter coughs quickly, sak-sack sound breathes(called wheezing) when she smells bad smells such as perfumes, other types of cosmetics, or chemicals. Why?

 

1. When she inhales or smells organic or inorganic chemicals, automobile fumes, perfumes, or cigarette smoke, her airways can contract and cause asthma attacks.

 

Eye allergies and nose allergies may also occur.

 

The smell of cosmetics, such as perfume, seems to have triggered an acute asthma attack.

 

1. Every time my 12-year-old son runs or does heavy physical exertion, he is experience shortness of breath, coughing and tinglingin the throat . Sometimes he said that the right chest hurts a lot. Why?

 

1. I have had almost the same questions and answers before.

 

It is normal  for anyone to have some shortness of breath when just running or doing heavy physical exercise.

 

When children with a history of asthma in the past or present run or do other physical exercises, whether the exercise triggers an asthma attack, the mild-lasting asthma they already have may get worse.

 

Chest pain can also occur when there is any other disease of the pectoral muscles, ribs, nerves,  the wall of the chest or the diaphragm.

 

Atelactis of the lung, pneumothorax, pneumonia, pleural abnormalities, or heart disease can also cause chest pain.

 

However asthma is the most common cause of chest pain in children and adolescents.

 

Asthma can cause chest pain when the airways are constricted.

 

Rarely, chest pain may occur due to complications such as atelectasis and pneumothorax that occur in asthma attacks, and chest pain may occur as a complication of asthma.

 

When you have asthma, you may have atelectasis or pneumothorax, which may cause you to breathe harder and your chest to hurt more.

 

My 11-year-old son eats well, sleeps well, and seems to be generally healthy. There is no other reason, but he may complain of fatigue several times a day.

 

He had a general physical examination at the pediatrivc office, but there is nothing wrong with it, and there is an allergy shinner. He was also diagnosed with mild allergic rhinitis and mild persistent asthma. It is said that fatigue is caused by such a diseases. Why is that?

1. With asthma, his airways contract and he cannot breathe normally.

So he cannot get enough oxygen from the inhalation of air.

And the carbon dioxide produced in the body cannot be pumped out of the body normally.

With allergic rhinitis, the nasal airway narrows, so he cannot get enough oxygen through the narrowed nasal cavity due to rhinitis.

The majority of children with atopic predisposition develop tension fatigue syndrome and may feel more fatigued, and will be less fatigued with proper for  treatment of asthma and allergic rhinitis.

Q. Hands trembling when taking albuterol syrup or pills. Are the shakings because of something wrong with his brain?

A. When treating asthma with oral albuterol syrup or pills, or when treating asthma with inhaled albuterol aerosol HFA, ther hands may shake a little and the heart may beat a little faster.

Such side effects usually occur temporarily and then disappear when the pharmacological action of the therapeutic drug disappears.

It is common to no longer have such side effects after several days of continued use.

If you experience such side effects, first consult your doctor.

If you have a slight hand tremor without any other abnormalities, it is okay to continue treatment with the drug.

When you have treatment for asthma with an inhaled albuterol aerosol  HFA or albuterol spray, or  oral albuterol tablets or syrup , severe side effects may not been occurred usually.

Q. Can breastfeeding a baby significantly reduce the rate of incidence of bronchial asthma attacks in babies and prevent bronchial asthma attacks?

A.That’s right.

It is said that the incidence of bronchial asthma attacks in children and adolescents raised by breastfeeding during infants has been significantly reduced, and the incidence of bronchial asthma attacks is significantly reduced, and the incidence of asthma attacks can be reliably prevented.

Q. Is it safe to treat asthma repeatedly with short-term oral corticosteroids as prescribed by a doctor?

A. As a result of a comparative study of bone density, bone metabolism and adrenal function of children who repeatedly received asthma treatment with short-term oral corticosteroids and children who did not receive corticosteroid treatment in that way, even if they received repeated treatment with short-term oral corticosteroids and It was concluded that it was safe.

Side effects may vary depending on the severity and frequency of use to treat asthma.

Q. Can eating some fruit and some kind fish reduce the incidence of bronchial asthma in children?

A.That’s right.

A Bulgarian scientist studied 20,000 children aged 7-11 years old and found that eating enough fruit foods and fish significantly reduced the chances of developing childhood asthma, chronic cough, and wheezing.

Children who ate smaller amounts of fish, fruits, and vegetables were reported to have more respiratory symptoms such as cough and asthma than children who ate more.

Omega-3 fatty acids in fish oil has anti-inflammatory properties,

Prevents oxidation in the body, such as vitamins, minerals, and fiber, which are abundant in vegetables and fruits, It supplies energy to fight and win bacteria and viruses,

Removes toxins produced in the body, Boosts immune function,

Makes the endothelial cells of the walls of each organ in each system strong,

Prevent bronchial asthma.

It is said to reduce respiratory problems.

Inadequate consumption of fish-like foods is said to lead to more chronic cough, wheezing, recurrent wheezing, and winter coughing.

Q. How many percent of children with chronic sinusitis (sinusitis) can have bronchial asthma.

A. It is 30-50%.

Q.How many percent of asthma patients are treated by a regular pediatrician.

A. Almost all children with asthma receive primary treatment for asthma from regular pediatricians.

Q. What kind of disease is asthma?

A.There is a problem with air entering and exiting the airways,

The airway  is narrowing,

A lower respiratory tract disease with inflammation of the airway wall is called asthma.

Asthma is called a variable disease.

Q. What pathological changes occur when you have asthma?

The lower tract contracts

The airways wall is swollen

The airway wall is inflamed.

Mucus is secreted from the mucous membrane walls.

The smooth muscle of the airway wall is over-formed and enlarged.

The epidermis of the airway mucosa layer is peeled off.

In severe cases, hypoxemia occurs.

Carbon monoxidemia can develop.

Q. Is asthma usually treated with antibiotics?

A. When treating asthma without bacterial infectious complications, it is not usually treated with antibiotics.

However, a recent study showed that antibiotic treatment for acute recurrent asthma without bacterial infection has a good therapeutic effect.

Recently, the results of comparing the treatment effect of acute recurring asthma with appropriate asthma medications and Telithromycin antibiotics were compared with appropriate asthma medications without antibiotics.

The study found that treatment with appropriate asthma medications and Telithromycin antibiotics gave better treatment.

Other studies have shown that mycoplasma infection can trigger asthma attacks.

Q. What are bronchial asthma and other diseases that need to be differentially diagnosed?

A. yes, specially with following  diseases such as  allergic rhinitis, sinusitis, common cold, flu, bronchiolitis, croup, vocal cord insufficiency, anaphylactic reaction, acute bronchitis, chronic bronchitis, pneumonia, airway foreign body, gastroesophageal reflux, food  allergy , bee allergy , Nervous cough, etc.

67. One hundred Qs & As on allergy rhinitis …383

Q. Is allergic rhinitis a genetic disease?

A.That’s right. In one generation to followings, it is inherited as a dominant autosomal.

It can be caused by both grandparents, fathers, mother, sons and daughters in one household.

Q. Is allergic rhinitis a common disease?

A.15% to 22% of people of all ages in the United States suffer from allergic rhinitis.

Another study found that 8.8 to 16% of Americans suffer from allergic rhinitis.

According to another study, 20-30% of children and adolescents suffer from allergic rhinitis.

The incidence rate is on the rise.

10% of American children before puberty,

Twenty percent of adolescent children and young people in the United States suffer from allergic rhinitis.

According to a survey of 13,579 children and adolescents aged 0-17 years old in the United States, the incidence of allergic rhinitis was 4.8% in the 0-4 years old, 10.5% in 5-11 years old,

It was 14.2% of the 12-17 years olds.

It can be thought that about 10-20 children out of 100 children and adolescents have allergic rhinitis.

The most common chronic disease of the respiratory system is allergic rhinitis.

Figure 3. Antigens that can cause allergic diseases including allergic rhinitis

Pet hair, dandruff, house dust mites, molds, fungus, pollen, drugs, fish or shellfish, cow milk and milk foods, eggs, flour food,  cosmetics, chocolate, nuts, peanuts, beans, etc.

These are antigens that can cause allergies relatively more often.

Children with severe allergic rhinitis can develop an adenoid face shape (allergic facial hair).

Copyright ⓒ 2011 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Photo 5. Various allergic diseases are easily caused by the foods as seen in the above  photo.

Fish, shellfish,  cow milk, milk foods,  wheat, s nuts, eggs, peanuts, and walnuts can cause allergies relatively more often.

Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP

Q. What is the cause and pathogenesis of allergic rhinitis?

A. As already mentioned, they are born with a genetic factor that is inherited as a autosomal dominant that can cause allergic rhinitis.

In addition, antigens that can cause allergies enter the body through the nose, mouth, through the mucous membrane of the gastrointestinal tract, through the skin or mucous membrane layersof other prgan, and through other organs in other systems of the body, and antigen-antibody abnormalities occur in the nasal mucosa in case of allergic rhinits.

At that time, histamine granules are released from mast cells from the nasal mucosal wall, and other biochemicals act in combination, causing allergic rhinitis.

Q. What are some of the antigens that cause allergic rhinitis?

A. Pollen from grass and trees, mold, fungus, hairs or dandruff from dogs, cats, cattle, horses, chickens, birds, etc., can be sucked into the airways through the nasal passages when breathing. Feathers, saliva, dead insect powder, house dust mites, and house dust which  can cause allergic rhinitis.

Antigens such as cow milk, eggs, chocolate, flour food, soybeans, fish, peanuts, etc., taken orally and through the gastrointestinal tract, can enter the blood stream and reach the mucous membrane of the nasal cavity, causing allergic rhinitis.

Allergic rhinitis can be caused by antigens entering the body through the skin or the mucous membrane of each organ nd also the blood.

Allergic rhinitis can develop in the mucous layer of the nasal cavity when a cat’s fur, dandruff, or saliva is inhaled directly into the nasal cavity.

When the nasal mucosa layer is no longer in contact with cat hair, dandruff, or saliva and so on , it is common for allergic rhinitis to no longer develop from cat hair, dandruff, or saliva.

When the nasal mucosa layer comes in contact with the cat’s hair, saliva, and dandruff again, allergic rhinitis can occur again as a cat hair antigen.

Q. How is allergic rhinitis triggered?

A.   When an antigen that can cause allergic rhinitis arrives at the nasal mucosa, histamine granules are released from the mast cells in the nose, causing the nasal mucosa to swell, capillaries in the nasal cavity are congested, runny nose, itchy nose, red and itchy eyes, and nose. It is common to have signs of clogging, open mouth and breathing.

If allergic rhinitis lasts for a long time, symptoms such as allergic salute, allergic shinner, and malocclusion may occur.

In severe cases,adenoid face can also be developed. Q.What is the annual medical bill for treating allergic rhinitis in the United States?

A. It is said that it costs $450 million annually.

Q. What are the possible signs of symptoms in children with chronic allergic rhinitis?

A. In addition to the main symptoms and signs described above, sometimes

·         Sleep disorder,

·         Learning disabilities,

·         Lack of concentration (attention deficit disorder) and/or hyperactivity (hyperactivity disorder),

·         Adenoid hypertrophy,

·         Tonsil hypertrophy,

·         Enlarged lymph nodes in the anterior neck area,

·         Adenoid facial appearnce,

·         Obstructive sleep apnea (sleep blocked apnea),

·         Teeth, malocclusion,

·         Trichosis- many body hairs,

·         Palm excess lines,

·         Allergic salute,

·         Dennie’s lines,

·         Symptoms such as nosal polyp may occur.

Q. Are there other diseases that may be more prevalent in children with allergic rhinitis.

A. Sinusitis and bronchial asthma, eye allergies, otitis media, and allergic conjunctivitis may occur simultaneously.

Q. What is the atopic constitution?

A. A constitution that is not a typical constitution is called atopic constitution or atopy.

There seem to be few people who are not atopic these days.

Children with atopic constitution are more susceptible to allergic diseases such as allergic rhinitis, bronchial asthma (asthma), atopic dermatitis, Ragweed contact dermatitis and hives, and food allergies are more prone to children with atopic constitution.

Q. How are allergic rhinitis and bronchial asthma related?

 A. Allergic rhinitis can be triggered in 90% of children with a past history of bronchial asthma , and bronchial asthma can also be treated well if allergic rhinitis is treated well.

The incidence of bronchial asthma in children with allergic rhinitis is three times higher than that in children without allergic rhinitis.

Children with allergic rhinitis have a 40% chance of developing bronchial asthma.

Allergic rhinitis and bronchial asthma are caused by biochemical mediation such as IgE, cytokines, histamine, and leukotriene, and bronchial asthma can be treated with corticosteroids, bronchodilators, antileukotene, and anti-IgE drugs, and allergic rhinitis  can be well treated with allergic rhinitis medications that contain drugs used to treat rochial asthma

Q. What is seasonal allergic rhinitis, perennial allergic rhinitis, and mixed allergic rhinitis?

A. When children with allergic rhinitis caused by an antigen such as mold or fungus go to a dry place where mold or fungus does not grow, it is common that allergic rhinitis is no longer caused by the mold or fungus antigen. When the children go to a humid place where mold or fungus grows, it is common for allergic rhinitis to be triggered again by mold or fungus antigen.

Symptoms of allergic rhinitis caused by mold or fungus may be worse in good temperatures for mold or fungus or seasons where mold or fungus is likely to grow, such as in wet summer.

Also, children suffering from allergic rhinitis due to allergic rhinitis caused by acacia flower pollen can cause allergic rhinitis every year with acacia flower pollen from May to June when acacia flowers are in full bloom.

This kind of allergic rhinitis is called seasonal allergic rhinitis.

Allergic rhinitis caused by ragweed pollen antigens can be induced in the fall when ragweed is grown, and allergic rhinitis is caused in spring with the Maple tree pollen antigen, which blooms a lot in the spring in the New England region of the United States.

This type of allergic rhinitis is called seasonal allergic rhinitis.

Allergic rhinitis can most often be triggered by antigens, such as house dust, dust mites, molds, fungus, or foods eaten almost daily.

Allergic rhinitis can develop year-round in children who have year-round contact with that type of antigen.

This type of allergic rhinitis is called perennial allergic rhinitis. Perennial allergic rhinitis (allergic rhinitis with symptoms throughout the year) caused by house dust mites. It is less common in children before 9 years old of age.

Many children develop seasonal allergic rhinitis as well as perennial allergic rhinitis.

This allergic rhinitis is called mixed allergic rhinitis.

Q. What is the relationship between cold or stress and the symptoms of allergic rhinitis?

A. In general, symptoms of allergic rhinitis can become even more severe when you have a viral upper respiratory infection such as a cold or flu, or when  under a lot of stress. Also, the more you are exposed to more types of antigens, the more severe the symptoms.

Q. What are the typical symptoms of acute allergic rhinitis

A. It depends on age, type of antigen, and the presence or absence of complications.

Typical symptoms of allergic rhinitis include:

·         Runny nose

·         The nose is stuffy and itchy

·         Sneeze.

·         The eyes may be red, itchy and tearful,

·         The palate may be itchy

·         Symptoms of these symptoms may recur according to seasonally and

·         Signs of these symptoms can be triggered temporarily and can occur throughout the season.

·         Signs of such symptoms may be mild, moderate, or severe.

 

1. Can newborns or infants develop allergic rhinitis?

 

A.Theoretically, the symptom and signs of allergic rhinitis can start in the neonatal period and then at any age.

 

When they  start eating artificial nutrients containing cow milk protein, allergy rhinitis  start to develop, especially in newborns with atopic constitution.

 

Allergic rhinitis may develop less in breastfed babies, but depending on the food the nursing mother ate, allergic rhinitis may develop in newborns and infants.

 

1. What is the incidence of allergic rhinitis that can be caused by cow milk or milk food

 

A.The incidence of allergic rhinitis caused by cow milk or milk-based foods is about 0.3%.

 

Q.What is the relationship between artificial nutrition and allergic rhinitis that newborns and infants with atopic constitution eat?

 

1. Newborns and infants, especially newborns and infants with atopic constitution, eating artificial nutrition, whole cow milk (whole cow milk) or milk food containing cow milk protein can cause allergic rhinitis due to cow milk protein.

 

Q.Can allergic rhinitis be worse if exposed to multiple antigens at once?

 

1. When children with allergic rhinitis from cow milk food are exposed at same time to house dust mites, they may get more likely allergic rhinitis due to house dust mite antigen, and also allergic rhinitis caused by cow milk protein and allergic rhinitis caused by house dust mites can.

 

1. What is the word “allergic salute”?

 

1. If your nose is itchy due to allergic rhinitis, there are symptoms of raising your one hand to rub your nose and rubbing your nose with your one hand in a salute position. This symptom is called “Allergy salute.

 

Q.What is the relationship between allergic rhinitis and oral breathing?

 

1. When your nose is stuffed with allergic rhinitis, you often open your mouth and breathe through your mouth rather than thru your nose.

 

This breathing is called “oral breathing” and is also called “gaping”.

 

People with chronic allergic rhinitis tend to open their mouths and breathe in front of anyone, day or night.

 

Sometimes some people  think because he is stupid  and he can not close thire mouth .

 

When newborns and infants develop allergic rhinitis, their noses are often stuffed and their mouths open and breathe with mouth open.

 

These symptoms are called gaping in English and oral breathing in Korean.

 

If allergic rhinitis is not treated properly and well, these symptoms may persist from neonatal to puberty and then may continue to appear after adulthood.

 

Q.What is the relationship between malocclusion and allergic rhinitis?

 

1. Long-term allergic rhinitis can lead to oral breathing, enlarged adenoids, enlarged tonsils, changes in the structure of the mouth and the face, and dentition problems.

 

And severe malocclusion can occur.

 

There are pros and cons here too.

 

In my experience, there is a close relationship between the malocclusion and allergic rhinitis.

 

So, I think that allergic rhinitis treatment plays an important role in the treatment of malocclusion.

 

1. What is the relationship between allergic rhinitis and adenoid facial apperance?

 

1. Allergic rhinitis can cause long-term symptoms of open mouth and breathing.

 

Teeth may have abnormalities such as pimples, jade teeth, and malocclusion. Interrelationship changes in the anatomical facial structure such as the eyes, the nose, the mouth, the face, and gums may occur and abnormalities may occur.

 

So, unusual funny facial features can appear in children with allergic rhinitis.

 

This facial  features  is called adenoid facial features.

 

1. What’s the difference between cold and allergic rhinitis?

 

1. A cold is a viral infection that occurs in the upper respiratory tract, such as the nose, nasal cavity, pharynx, sinuses, adenoids, and tonsils.

 

When you catch a cold, you have a mild or high fever, a sore throat, and a sore body.

 

The cold usually heals naturally within 10-14 days.

 

With allergic rhinitis, the mucous membranes in the nasal cavity are swollen and red, the nosal cavity may be blocked, you have a runny nose, and you can sneeze.

 

They usually can’t sleep well.

 

Allergic rhinitis is an allergic disease, and when you suffer from allergic rhinitis, it usually lasts more than two weeks without a fever, no sore throat, no sickness.

 

In this way, cold and allergic rhinitis are different.

 

Sometimes these two disease can be together.

 

1. What is the relationship between allergic rhinitis and adenoids or tonsils

 

1. Adenoids are a type of lymphoid tissue located in the p0sterior back of the nasal cavity and the top of the pharynx.

 

Adenoids protect against infectious diseases by catching sources such as bacteria, and viruses that enter through the nose and preventing them from entering deeper into the body other than the upper respiratory tract.

 

It also catches harmful antigens that enter the body through the nose and prevents them from entering the body any more.

 

Excessive use of these adenoidal functions results in anatomically enlarged adenoids.

 

In almost the same way, the pharyngeal tonsils on both sides of the mouth will also become enlarged.

 

In particular, children with allergic rhinitis usually have abnormally larger adenoids and tonsils.

 

1. Children with allergic rhinitis may snore more often, why?

 

1. In children with allergic rhinitis, adenoids and tonsils are abnormally larger, the nose airway partially is blocked, oral breathing, and anatomical changes such as the nasal cavity, palate, and dentition occur.

 

As a result, they often make a snore when talking and snore when sleeping.

 

In particular, allergic rhinitis in school-age children can cause frequent clogging of the nose, adenoids in the back of the nasal cavity and abnormally large tonsils in both sides of the mouth.

 

That’s why they snore too.

 

1. When you have allergic rhinitis, your nose bleeds well. Why?

 

A.With allergic rhinitis, the nasal mucosa is swollen, pale  and the capillaries in the mucosa wall are abnormally dilated.

 

Sneezing, coughing, minor nasal trauma, or even lightly rubbing the nose can cause the dilated mucosa capillaries to burst and noes bleed easily.

 

1. Do they cough even with allergic rhinitis?

 

1. If they have allergic rhinitis, they may cough a little intermittently. In particular, when they lie down at night, their runny nose flows to the posterior part of the nasal cavity and the nasopharynx, which irritates the pharynx, which can cause intermittent coughing while sleeping.

 

In addition, 30% of children with allergic rhinitis suffer from simultaneous bronchial asthma.

 

That can also cause coughing and sometimes coughing with both allergic rhinitis and bronchial asthma.

 

Most children with bronchial asthma have nocturnal bronchial asthma attacks while they sleep at night, so it is common to cough while sleeping.

 

Sometimes you cough like this for several days.

 

Bronchial asthma attacks caused by this sleep are called nocturnal bronchial asthma.

 

Differentiate diagnosis of whether children with allergic rhinitis cough at night, coughing with nocturnal bronchial asthma, coughing with allergic rhinitis, or coughing due to both allergic rhinitis and nocturnal bronchial asthma sometimes it is difficult.

 

1. If you have allergic rhinitis, can you easily get sinusitis?

 

1. That’s right.

 

If you have allergic rhinitis, you may be more prone to sinusitis.

 

The nasal mucosa layer and the sinus mucosa layer are made up of the same type of mucous membrane cells, and the sinuses and nasal cavity are connected to each other by small natural vents.

 

In addition, the swollen and inflammation of the mucous membrane layer of the upper repiratory tract that caused allergic rhinitis  and It may frequently block small natural vents.

 

Obstruction of the natural aireway makes it easier to infect the sinuses, making it more prone to sinusitis.

 

There are all togeth 8 sinuses on both sides of the face, including the frontal, ethmoid, sphenoid, and maxillary sinuses around the nasal cavity.

 

The sinuses in and around the nasal cavity are normally connected to each other by small vents.

 

The mucous membranes in the vents can be swollen due to allergic rhinitis, which can block the vents, resulting in sinusitis and sinus headaches.

 

For this reason, most children with allergic rhinitis are more prone to sinusitis.

 

1. Can they have frequent headaches with allergic rhinitis?

 

1. When they have allergic rhinitis, the small ventsr that connects between your sinuses and your nasal cavity is easily clogged, which can often lead to clogged sinus headaches .

 

In addition, sinusitis can occur, which can cause headaches as a symptom of sinusitis, and tension fatigue syndrome can occur in children with atopic constitution, which can also lead to frequent headaches.

 

1. Can they get more otitis media if they have allergic rhinitis

 

1. they can have more.

 

There is the Eustachin  canal to  connect between the orifice at the posterior nostril airway and middle ear cavity. It can be  swollen, causing frequent blockage by allergic rhintis.

 

At this time, negative pressure may develop in the middle ear cavity.

 

Exudate may collect in the middle ear cavity and otitis media may develop.

 

This can lead to bacterial infection in the effusion of the middle ear, resulting in acute otitis media.

 

The Eustachian canal may be swollen, causing frequent clogging , and air can not flow between the posterior pharyngeal cavity and the middle ear cavity .

 

They may have acute otitis media or otitis media often.

 

Sometimes hearing impairment can occur.

 

1. Is there a difference between a runny nose when they have allergic rhinitis and a runny nose when they have sinusitis?

 

1. When allergic rhinitis is alone without complications, it is common to have a clear runny nose.

 

However, when both allergic rhinitis and bacterial sinusitis are present, it is common for the runny nose to be yellow or bluish and a darker runny nose. Sometimes there is no difference in a runny nose.

 

1. If I have allergic rhinitis, does a runny nose come out?

 

1. Even if you have allergic rhinitis alone, you may not have a runny nose, and even if you have sinusitis alone, you may not have a runny nose.

 

Or, even when both ailments are present at the same time, a clear runny nose may come out little by little, sometimes even a little less.

 

1. Does allergic rhinitis cause allergic diseases in the eyes and the mouth?

 

1. It is likely to occur.

 

Allergic diseases may occur simultaneously in the eyes, sinuses, adenoids, tonsils, pharynx, and mouth.

 

For example, allergic conjunctivitis can develop.

 

Allergic conjunctivitis can cause frequent conjunctivitiswith red eyes, frequent tears, and itchy eyes, leading to frequent rubbing of the eyes.

 

Allergic rhinitis can cause frequent geograph-shaped tongues.

 

1. I’ve been told that some of the children with allergic rhinitis can choke during sleep, resulting in apnea, sometimes painfully breathing or snoring. Why?

 

1. The adenoids of children with atopic constitution are usually much larger and enlarged than the adenoids of children who do not have an atopic constitution.

 

Also, the one way is also usually larger.

 

Because of this, children with allergic rhinitis have a much narrower upper respiratory tract, or breath.

 

That’s why you can briefly choke during sleep, breathing painfully or snoring.

 

Sometimes blocked apnea (obstructive sleep apnea) can also develop.

 

1. I read that some of the kids with allergic rhinitis have enlarged lymph nodes in the neck just below the lower jaw, and why?

 

1. Children with allergic rhinitis usually have enlarged lymph nodes in the neck area just under the lower jaw.

 

The lymph nodes in the neck just under the lower jaw just like are adenoids and tonsils, which are a kind of lymphoid tissue, and the lymphatic tissue functions to protect against infectious diseases by preventing antigens and bacteria from entering the body through the mouth or nasal cavity through the nasal and pharyngeal cavity anymore.

 

With such a defense function, the lymph nodes in neck also become excessively large.

 

1. Most of the children with allergic rhinitis have a habit of getting teeth grounding during sleep at night. Why is that?

 

A.If you have allergic rhinitis, it can be itchy in your eyes and nose, as well as your pharynx and palate.

 

There are some doctors who claim that they groun teeth unconsciously as a way to solve the itching in the nasal  cavity, the pharynx and/or palate and they try to move  the upper and lower jaw to relieve the itching feeling while sleeping.

 

Most children with allergic rhinitis have a such habit of sleeping at night and having their teeth grouding frequently.

 

Q.What can happen to your mouth or face if you have allergic rhinitis?

 

1. Because the nose is often blocked and the mouth is open to breathe, many changes in the interrelationship of the anatomy of the mouth, face, nose, jaw, teeth, and gums can occur in children with allergic rhinitis.

 

One of the resulting tooth changes is malocclusion.

 

The second is adenoid face. I already mentioned it before.

 

There are many other changes that can happen to their face.

 

1. It is said that children with allergic rhinitis sometimes get more body hair, but why?

 

A.The antigen enters the body by the mouth, the nasal passages, or through the skin or the mucous membrane. More body hair is produced to prevent those antigens that enter the body from entering the body any more.

 

It’s almost the same thing to have more hair in your nostrils.

 

1. How is allergic rhinitis diagnosed?

 

1. It is common to comprehensively diagnose the current medical history, past medical history, family medical history, symptom and signs, and physical examination findings.

 

If necessary, the diagnosis is made by several other methods, such as an allergy trigger test, an allergy skin test, and a blood test.

 

1. Do children with allergic rhinitis suffer from a cold differently than children without allergic rhinitis?

 

1. Symptoms of allergic rhinitis may worsen when children with allergic rhinitis have a cold or other types of viral upper respiratory tract infections.

 

And symptoms of upper respiratory tract infection, such as a cold, can be even more severe.

 

1. What are the common complications and coexistences of allergic rhinitis?

 

A.With allergic rhinitis, children may have coexisting morbidities such as bronchial asthma, sinusitis, otitis media, atopic dermatitis, food allergy, drug allergy, and insect allergy.

 

1. What are the signs and symptoms that are very important in diagnosing allergic rhinitis.

 

1. Because the nose is itchy, the habit of rubbing the nose which can cause the horizontal skin wrinkl on the nose where the nasal bonea and nasal cartilage of the nose are connected. Skin wrinkle ise called Dennie lines.

 

Signs of raising your hand and rubbing your nose are called ‘allergic salutes’ or ‘Allergy salutes.’

 

The darkish color of the skin just under the lower eyelids under both eyes changes to a dark skin color  tone.

 

They are called allergic shinners.

 

Allergic shinners can occur temporarily or can last for months or longer after one onset.

 

Shinner means that when a bruise on the face or any part of the body is injured, the skin color temporarily changes to darken after the bruise.

 

When allergic rhinitis lasts for a long time, the anatomical interrelationships of the nose, nasal cavity, mouth, adenoids, tonsils, etc. change unusually.

 

The shape of your face can turn into a foolish lookihg face.

 

This shape of the face is called an adenoid face, or adenoidal face.

 

Adverse signs are of considerable value in diagnosing allergic rhinitis.

 

1. How is allergic rhinitis diagnosed?

 

1. Although already explained, it is mainly diagnosed by synthesizing the patient’s past and present medical history, family medical history, symptom signs, and examination findings.

 

Blood tests, allergic skin tests, parenteral tests as needed. Diagnosis is performed by examining the nasal cavity with a nasal endoscope.

 

Symptoms of typical allergic rhinitis, conjunctival conjunctiva, and rhinoscopical physical examination of the nasal cavity with pale nasal mucosa and abnormally wet signs are helpful in diagnosing the disease. In addition, there may be symptoms such as frequent blockage of the Eustachian ear canal, coughing intermittently, and a feeling of pressure in the paranasal sinus area.

 

1. Is family medical history important to diagnose allergic rhinitis

 

1. If you have a family history of allergic diseases such as bronchial asthma, allergic dermatitis, allergic rhinitis, drug allergies, contact dermatitis, food allergies, etc., it can be very helpful in diagnosing allergic rhinitis.

 

And, if any of your parents’ siblings have atopic constitution, it is very helpful in diagnosing.

 

1. How do you know if allergic rhinitis can also be triggered by food antigens?

 

1. Allergic rhinitis is inherited as somatic autosomal dominance.

 

Allergic rhinitis can also be caused by food antigens.

 

One of the ways to find out what foods are causing allergic rhinitis is a trigger test.

 

You can also diagnose by avoiding eating that food.

 

1. What is a provocative test

 

1. Allergic rhinitis caused by food antigens is diagnosed with a trigger test.

 

Do not eat any food suspected to cause allergic rhinitis for 2-4 weeks, and while not eating the food for 2-4 weeks, carefully observe whether the symptoms of allergic rhinitis improve, disappear, add to, or change. .

 

If the symptoms of allergic rhinitis improve significantly at this time, it may be thought that the food may have caused allergic rhinitis.

 

However, it is not possible to make a diagnosis this way.

 

If you then re-eat the food that you suspected triggered allergic rhinitis, and the symptoms of allergic rhinitis recur almost the same as before, you can think that it is very likely that the food caused allergic rhinitis.

 

The method of diagnosing an allergic disease by finding the food (antigen) that caused allergic rhinitis in this way is called a challenge test .

 

Provoking tests should not be done at any time and should never be done at the discretion of the parents or patient himself

1. How to avoid or eliminate any antigens or triggers that may cause allergies as much as possible.

 

It is an ideal treatment method.

 

More specifically, it is as follows.

 

Antigens that can cause allergic rhinitis or many other types of allergic disorder –food should be avoided as much as possible.

 

Give breastfeeding as much as possible or feeding hypoallergenic artificial nutrition to newborns or infants born to siblings of biological parents or siblings with an allergic disease or atopic constitution, instead of feeding artificial nutrition with cow milk, milk protein, or soy protein to prevents it from being triggered and treats allergic rhinitis that has already occurred properly.

 

To prevent allergic rhinitis and other allergic diseases, avoid eating other foods that may well trigger allergic diseases.

 

In particular, foods such as cow milk, eggs, and chocolate are well known as foods that can more  induce other types of allergic diseases, including allergic rhinitis.

 

Avoid such food as much as possible. Sometimes food cravings that cause allergic rhinitis can occur, so caution is advised.

 

It is recommended that pets such as dogs, cats, and birds are not kept in the home if possible.

 

Inevitably, when raising a pet at home, do not let it come into contact with or inhale the animal’s fur, saliva, dander, feathers, etc., and bathe the dog frequently.

 

Plants or trees should not be raised in the house where children with atopic constitution or allergic rhinitis live as much as possible.

 

Mold or fungus grows in humid places such as basements, so make sure that the humidity in the house is properly controlled to prevent mold or fungus from growing.

 

It is better to have a carpet that you can reap or not to cover as needed, because fixed carpets can get more house dust and more dust mites in your house can grow.

 

You have to wash the curtains often.

 

Cleans up house dust in the house and prevents dust mites from growing.

 

Children with allergic rhinitis or atopic predisposition should not put anything other than bedding in the bedroom.

 

Cover the bed mattress and spring box with plastic covers to prevent dust mites from growing.

 

In spring when flowers are in full bloom, close the windows so that pollen and mold do not enter the house.

 

When planting or mowing the lawn, pollen and mold can be inhaled into the airways, which can lead to allergic rhinitis, allergic conjunctivitis, or bronchial asthma.

 

It is difficult to absolutely avoid such antigenic contact, but avoid it as much as possible.

 

You should wear a mask and mow the lawn as needed, wearing glasses that prevent dust from entering your eyes.

During the season when the ragweed flower is in bloom, do not go where the ragweed weed grows.

 

Do not wear clothes made of animal hair,  bird feathers, and never use feathers pillows or blankets with fur.

 

Reduce house dust mites with HEPA air filters or Acaricides.

 

Exterminate cockroaches.

 

1. I want to know about allergic rhinitis medication

 

Antihistamines.

• There are the 1st generation antihistamines and the 2nd generation antihistamines.

 

• Anti-inflammatory therapy,

 

• Antigen immunotherapy

 

• Treatment of leukotriene receptor antagonists.

 

• Treatment with corticosteroids.

 

• Mast cell  stabilizer treatment.

 

• Nasal mucosa decongestant treatment that is put directly into the nasal cavity.

 

• Alpha adrenaline agonist treatment.

 

• Comprehensive treatment.

 

1. Tell us about antihistamines used in allergic rhinitis medications.

 

1. Antihistamines are drugs used to treat allergic diseases by blocking the histamine isolation from mast cells and basophilic cells from binding to the cell feeder.

 

Antihistamines are divided into the 1st generation antihistamines and the 2nd generation antihistamines.

 

Antihistamines such as Periactin, Chlor-trimeton, Benadryl, and Pyribenzamine are the first-generation antihistamines.

 

Allergic rhinitis can be treated with just one type of first-generation antihistamine.

 

When treated with the first-generation antihistamines, it has the effect of treating allergic rhinitis, as well as sedative effect and sleeping effect, which can lead to various side effects such as sleepiness.

 

So these days, allergic rhinitis is more often treated with the second-generation antihistamines such as ,

 

• Claritin,

 

• Astemizole,

 

• Cetirizine,

 

• Fesofenadine,

 

• Loratadine

 

• and also others are second-generation antihistamines.

 

When treating allergic rhinitis with the second-generation antihistamines, the therapeutic effect is good, the sedative effect is low, and side effects such as sleepiness may appear less.

 

Treating allergic rhinitis with antihistamines improves symptoms of runny nose, sneezing, itchy nose, and tearing.

 

The disadvantage of the second-generation histamine treatment is that it has very little decongestion effect on the nasal mucosa.

 

For that reason, there are also methods of taking first-generation antihistamines before going to bed in the evening and second-generation antihistamines during the day.

 

1. Tell please about anti-inflammatory medications used in allergic rhinitis medications.

 

1. Antihistamines can treat allergic rhinitis by preventing histamine from working.

 

However, inflammation in the nasal cavity is not treated.

 

Anti-inflammatory drugs are used to treat such inflammation.

 

Anti-inflammatory drugs

 

• Budesonide,

 

• Fluticasone,

 

• Vansenase (Vancenase Aq Nasal Spray 0.084%),

 

• And beclomethasone.

Allergic rhinitis can be treated with nasal sprays made of corticosteroids, which are applied to the nasal mucosa.

 

1. The side effects of treatment with the first-generation antihistamines are

 

1. No matter what type of antihistamine is treated, side effects can occur while treating allergic rhinitis with that antihistamine, and the side effects depend on the type of antihistamine.

 

When treating allergic rhinitis or other allergic diseases with the first-generation antihistamines, there may be side effects such as sleep, sedation, poor concentration, and dry saliva.

 

However, when treated with the second-generation antihistamines, such side effects are less common.

 

1. When treated with antihistamines, is it only treated with one type of antihistamine?

 

1. When allergic rhinitis is treated with antihistamines, it can be treated well with one type of antihistamine.

 

Sometimes, treatment with two types of antihistamines at the same time will be more effective.

 

Antihistamines, nasal decongestants, and anti-inflammatory drugs are sometimes used in combination.

 

1. Can tolerance develop when treated with one type of antihistamine

 

1. There is.

 

Depending on the symptoms and severity of allergic rhinitis, one or two types of first-generation antihistamines can be selected and treated.

 

When treating allergic rhinitis with a first-generation antihistamine, the treatment effect appears well for the first time after the start of treatment, but after a while, if the treatment effect no longer appears, even when no further treatment with the first-generation antihistamine is required according to the doctor’s instructions.

 

When treating allergic rhinitis with one type of antihistamine, if the treatment works well, you can continue treatment with that drug as needed.

 

In addition, when treatment with one type of antihistamine, the therapeutic effect is very good for the first time, but if you continue treatment for a long time with the same antihistamine, the therapeutic effect may gradually decrease, and the treatment effect may disappear very later.

 

That’s why there are times when you switch to other types of antihistamines.

 

1. What are some things to watch out for when choosing allergic rhinitis as an antihistamine

 

1. Even when treating allergic rhinitis with antihistamines, it is ideal to select and treat an appropriate antihistamine according to the doctor’s diagnosis and prescription.

 

1. What are the typical second-generation antihistamines?

 

1. Loratadine (Claritin), Cetirizine (Zyrtec), Fexofenadine (Allegra),

 

and Desloratadine (Clarinex).

 

Previously, a doctor’s prescription was required to buy and treat these second-generation antihistamines, but second-generation antihistamines such as Loratadine (Claritin) and Cetirizine (Zyrtec) can be purchased and treated at a pharmacy without a doctor’s prescription.

 

Treating allergic rhinitis with second-generation antihistamines has good therapeutic effects and does not cause sleep-related side effects that cause sleep, so it is not common to treat them with first-generation antihistamines these days.

 

1. What are the side effects of second-generation antihistamine?

 

1. It is less sedative and has very few side effects, such as drowsiness.

 

There is also a comprehensive treatment for allergic rhinitis made by combining the second-generation antihistamine and sudafed, a capillary decongestion drug in the nasal mucosa.

 

1. Can Pseudoephedrine treat allergic rhinitis?

 

1. of course.

 

Sudafed is an alpha adrenaline agonist.

 

Treating allergic rhinitis with Sudafed improves the symptoms of a swelling of the mucous membrane due to decongestion of the nasal mucosa and a stuffy nose.

 

These types of drugs are also called decongestants in the nasal mucosa.

 

Nasal mucosa decongestants include oral pills (tablets) and liquid potions, sprays that can be sprayed directly into the nasal cavity, and nasal drops that can be dropped into the nasal cavity as drops.

 

Some drugs contain only the ingredients of the nasal mucosa decongestant, and there is also a comprehensive nasal mucosa decongestant made by combining the ingredients of an antihistamine and a nasal mucosa decongestant.

 

Pseudoephedrine, which is commonly used these days, is a kind of decongestant in the nasal mucosa and its medicinal properties.

1. It can be treated with a decongestant in the nasal mucosa swollen that is put directly into the nasal cavity.

 

Afrin (oxymetazoline) nasal spray or Neosynephrine nasal spray alleviate congestion in the nasal mucosa.

 

Nasal drops (nose-drops) can be dropped into the nasal cavity or sprayed into the nasal cavity to relieve congestion of the nasal mucosa, thereby quickly clearing the nasal cavity blocked by allergic rhinitis.

 

Neosynephrine has nasal spray and nasal drops.

 

There is also a nasal spray in AfRIN.

 

Treatment by dropping nasal drops directly onto the nasal mucosa or treatment with a nasal spray can quickly and temporarily relieve nasal congestion.

 

Depending on the type of drug, the effect of decongestion of the nasal mucosa layer may last 6 to 12 hours, and symptoms of the nose blocked by allergic rhinitis may be temporarily improved.

 

Continued treatment with these drugs for more than 5 days can damage the nasal mucosa. therefore

 

When treating with nasal mucosa decongestants, such as nasal sprays made of afrin or nasal sprays made of neosynephrine, you must follow your doctor’s prescription.

 

These drugs can be bought at pharmacies without a doctor’s prescription.

 

1. What are the mast cell stabilizers used to treat allergic rhinitis?

 

1. Mast cell stabilizers are sprayed directly into the nasal cavity to prevent the release of histamine granules in mast cells.

 

Cromolyn nasal spray is a mast cell stabilizer and has a pharmacological action that prevents the release of histamine granules in mast cells.

 

Cromolyn nasal spray is used to prevent bronchial asthma from being triggered. Cromolyn nasal spray can prevent allergic rhinitis from occurring and treat allergic rhinitis that has already occurred.

 

It is easy to treat and preventive effect by spraying a cromolyn spray into the nasal cavity.

 

Even with continued use of cromolyn spray for weeks to months, the preventive effect continues to be good.

 

Side effects of cromolyn sprays are very rare.

 

You can buy and use it without a prescription, but the big disadvantage is that it is expensive.

 

1. About corticosteroids used to treat allergic rhinitis

 

1. Corticosteroid sprays are anti-inflammatory .

 

For mild allergic rhinitis, a second-generation antihistamine is selected and treated first, and when treating moderate allergic rhinitis or severe allergic rhinitis, a corticosteroid nasal spray is the preferred treatment.

 

Corticosteroids such as Beclomethasone, Budesonide, or Triamcinolone are sprayed directly into the nasal cavity to treat allergic rhinitis.

 

Beclomethasone nasal spray and Budsonide nasal spray are available in two types: a powder form spray and a liquid form spray that can be sprayed into the nasal cavity.

 

Some types of corticosteroid nasal sprays are treated by spraying them into both nasal passages once or twice a day as prescribed by your doctor.

 

Allergic rhinitis may be treated for weeks to months, depending on the course of treatment.

 

In general, when treating allergic rhinitis with a corticosteroid nasal spray sprayed in the nasal cavity, the therapeutic effect usually begins to appear around 12 hours after the start of treatment.

 

Side effects such as nasal bleeding, increased intraocular pressure, glaucoma, and delayed  growth may occur, but these side effects are usually rare even after continued treatment for several weeks.

 

In particular, when treating allergic rhinitis with a corticosteroid nasal spray, the medication must be used according to only the doctor’s prescription.

 

1. Can allergic rhinitis be treated with corticosteroid injections

 

A.When severe allergic rhinitis can not be treated with other types of treatment, oral corticosteroids or intramuscular depot corticosteroids can be treated for several days.

 

1. Can it be treated with leukotriene receptor antagonists?

 

1. It can be treated with Leukotriene-receptor antagonists.

 

Treatment with nasal Montelukast sodium (Singulair) can definitely improve the symptoms of allergic rhinitis.

 

These days, treatment with leukotriene receptor antagonists tends to lead to suicide, so research is underway.

 

1. Is it treated with anticholinergics?

 

1. It can be treated with anticholinergics.

 

Allergic rhinitis can be treated by spraying a nasal spray from Ipratropium bromide (Nasal Atrovent 0.03%) into the nasal cavity.

 

When you have a lot of clear runny nose, treatment with this type of drug is effective.

 

1. Can antihistamines and nasal corticosteroids be treated at the same time?

 

A.You can.

 

Antihistamines and corticosteroids can be treated simultaneously.

 

If severe allergic rhinitis that cannot be treated well with oral antihistamines alone or corticosteroid nasal sprays alone. Allergic rhinitis, can be treated with oral antihistamines and corticosteroid nasal sprays at the same time.

 

1. In what cases can antigen immunotherapy be cured

 

1. Moderate allergic rhinitis or severe allergic rhinitis that is not well treated with proper treatment

 

Severe allergic rhinitis requiring treatment with systemic corticosteroids

 

Severe allergic rhinitis that does not cure even with proper treatment with an appropriate corticosteroid

 

Allergic rhinitis can be treated with antigen immunotherapy when sinusitis and, or both, bronchial asthma and allergic rhinitis are present.

 

1. Please tell me about antigenic immunotherapy

 

1. Pure antigenic substances can be purified and extracted from cat hair, dog hair, dandruff, vegetation pollen, or house dust mites, which can cause allergic rhinitis.

 

The degree of skin reaction that occurs when various kinds of antigenic substances purified and extracted are brought into contact with or injected into the skin layer of children with allergic rhinitis or other allergic diseases. What kind of antigen is the allergic disease the child has? You can see if it is caused by.

 

Antigen immunotherapy treatment can be performed by subcutaneous injection of a very small amount of antigenic substances found in the results of skin reaction tests tested on children with allergic rhinitis.

 

Initially, immunotherapy is started with a minimum amount of antigenic substances, and the dose is gradually increased to the maintenance dose of antigenic immunotherapy.

 

After increasing the maintenance dose to the antigen immunotherapy maintenance dose, it is common to perform antigen immunotherapy by giving the maintenance dose every 2 to 6 weeks.

 

It is said that treatment with these antigenic immunotherapy alleviates symptoms of allergic rhinitis by ⅔. Antigen immunotherapy is not the first choice of a method of treating allergic rhinitis .

 

While antigenic immunotherapy seems theoretically the ideal treatment for allergic rhinitis, it is not the first choice for a number of reasons when treating allergic rhinitis.

 

As previously explained, even if appropriate treatment with allergen (antigen) avoidance or elimination, allergy treatment drugs, or antigen removal and avoidance, the symptoms of allergic rhinitis are not well treated or symptoms of allergic rhinitis are severe, so you can not sleep well. When it is impossible to study at school or at home, and when there is a lot of trouble with daily life, it is common to treat allergic rhinitis with antigen immunotherapy.

 

Allergic rhinitis in infants and young children before 3 years of age is not usually treated with antigen immunotherapy.

 

Studies have shown that bronchial asthma is much less common in children aged 4 to 14 years old who have been treated for allergic rhinitis with antigen immunotherapy.

 

When treated with antigen immunotherapy, systemic side effects can occur in 5 to 10%, and some side effects can be life threatening.

 

The disadvantage is that the treatment cost is also substantial.

 

Antigen immunotherapy is usually administered by subcutaneous injection, but in the West, antigen immunotherapy is also performed by placing an antigen under the tongue.

 

1. The results of treatment with corticosteroids and second-generation antihistamines

 

1. Severe allergic rhinitis is treated with a corticosteroid nasal spray sprayed into the nasal cavity and a second-generation antihistamine that has a very low non-sedative effect.

 

36-80% of seasonal allergic rhinitis or 55-86% of perennial allergic rhinitis are treated well.

 

1. What is Coblation turbinate reduction treatment?

 

1. Chronic allergic rhinitis can cause congestion of the nasal mucosa and swelling and blockage of the nasal cavity.

 

Allergic rhinitis or other causes can cause the turbinate to become irritated, inflamed, and bulky. The surgical treatment method that reduces the volume of the swelling, inflamed, and enlarged turbinate without damaging the tissues of the nasal mucosa is called Coblation turbinate relief.

 

When the nose is blocked (the nasal airway area is blocked) and there is no significant therapeutic effect even after all medical treatments, this surgical method can be used (Source-Pediatric News, July 2007).

 

1. I heard in recent news that the age at which allergic rhinitis begins depends on the trigger.

Explain about it?

 

1. The age at which allergic rhinitis begins to develop depends on the triggering factor.

 

Suffering from allergic rhinitis is also a problem, and the cost of treatment is substantial.

 

And children with allergic rhinitis are more prone to sinusitis, nasal polyps, otitis media, sleep problems, and bronchial asthma.

 

Cow milk, eggs, flour foods, cockroaches, cats, dogs, and house dust mites are “well-known” as triggers of allergic rhinitis.

 

Various health problems can occur due to sleep problems, apnea, lack of concentration, study difficulties, and decreased productivity.

 

Allergic rhinitis can be triggered before 1 year of age, but real allergic rhinitis does not develop before 1 year of age.

 

Children’s IgE antibodies, which play a major role in causing allergic rhinitis, appear later than IgG, IgA, and IgM antibodies, so allergic rhinitis does not develop before the age of 1 year.

 

The age at which allergic rhinitis begins to develop depends on the triggering factor.

 

Suffering from allergic rhinitis is also a problem, and the cost of treatment is substantial.

 

And children with allergic rhinitis are more prone to sinusitis, nasal polyps, otitis media, sleep problems, and bronchial asthma.

 

Cow milk, eggs, flour foods, cockroaches, cats, dogs, and house dust mites are “well-known” as triggers of allergic rhinitis.

 

Various health problems can occur due to sleep problems, apnea, lack of concentration, study difficulties, and decreased productivity.

 

Allergic rhinitis can be triggered before 1 year of age, but real allergic rhinitis does not develop before 1 year of age.

 

Allergic rhinitis is less common before 1 year of age because child murine lice (IgE) antibodies, which play a major role in causing allergic rhinitis, appear later than IgG, IgA, and IgM antibodies.

 

Allergic rhinitis caused by pollen usually takes about 3 years after exposure to pollen begins, so it is not common to develop pollen allergic rhinitis before 3 years of age.

 

Perennial rhinitis (allergic rhinitis with symptoms throughout the year) caused by house dust mites is less common before age 9 yers old .

 

Allergic rhinitis caused by cow milk or milk-based foods is about 0.3%.

 

The incidence of allergic rhinitis in children with atopic constitution will be higher.

 

Bronchial asthma can also develop in 50% of infants under 2 years of age with allergic rhinitis. However, it will occur at a much higher frequency than that.

 

Fexofenadine (Allegra), Loratadine (Claritin), Cetirizine (Zyrtec), etc. are non-sedative histamines and do not show a sedative effect during treatment with this drug.

 

Azelastine (Astelin) is a drug that has antihistamine and anti-inflammatory properties and is sprayed into the nasal cavity.

 

There are corticosteroid nasal sprays such as Beclomethasone, Budesonide (RhinocortAqua), Dexamethasone, Flunisolide, Fluticasone propionate, Mometasone furoate, and Triamcinolone acetonide. These corticosteroids have anti-inflammatory properties. These are topical allergic rhinitis treatments used to treat allergic rhinitis by spraying into the nasal cavity.

 

Atrovent nasal spray is a nasal capillary decongestant

 

Cromolyn sodium nasal spray has anti-inflammatory properties.

 

Depending on your age and the severity of the main symptoms of allergic rhinitis, the treatment of allergic rhinitis by choosing one or two of the above-described drugs is very effective.

 

Severe allergic rhinitis is treated with a corticosteroid nasal spray that is sprayed into the nasal cavity and a second-generation antihistamine that has a very low non-sedative effect.

 

36-80% of seasonal allergic rhinitis and 55-86% of perennial allergic rhinitis are treated well.

 

For more information on budesonide nasal sprays, please visit www.rhinocortaqua.com.

 

 

51. Older brothers or sisters’ jealousy towards to newborn siblings…….430

The following is an example of a question-and-answer on Internet pediatric adolescent health counseling about

“He does not  listen to words after having a younger brother”.

 

Q & A. He does not listen well after having a younger brother

 

1. I am Lee Ae-gi’s aunt… He had a younger brother a few days ago, but before the younger brother was born, he listen well, but from the time his younger brother was born, He became a troublemaker and become “a blue frog”.

 

He spit it out while eating ice cream. He really dosn’t listen. But I am also worry that he may get hurt if I am punished. What should I do in this case?

 

He can’t have toilet training yet, but I’m also worried about that.. It’s been 25 months..

 

1. Hello. Thanks for asking.

 

Ideally, diagnosis and treatment should be performed by combining information obtained from the results of the child’s age and gender, past and present family history, symptom and signs and medical examination findings, and appropriate clinical tests, but I will respond based on the information provided.

 

It seems that the child has a normal jealousy of seeing his new brother.

 

The next article is about jealousy between brothers, so please refer to it.

 

There are some children who have their toilet training at the age of 2, but after age 2 year old there are more children who haver their toilet training.

It is natural and normal for older brothers to feel jealous when they see a new brother and think that he will become their partner.

 

This kind of jealousy occurs in almost all children who have new brother.

 

But infants between the ages of 2 and 4 years old are more jealous when they see their new brother. There are many reasons for this, but infants at this time can feel more clearly than ever that they live with affection and loving care from their parents.

 

On the one hand, they think that they are independent human beings, but they are totally dependent on their parents.

 

After a new younger sibling is brought, jealousy arises when parents and family members think that they take care for and love the new sibling more than they do older children. Mom gives new sibiling breast milk or artificial nutrition, and she  take care of old children less than before, and old  brother think parents  love them no more. Parents should take more special care of their older children so that they can reassure them and feel that they love and care about them as they did before their new brother was born.

 

You must be careful not to love too much and caring for your new child in front of the older brother who has seen it.

 

When your friends, family, or people taking care of your new baby, they need to be careful not to hurt the older brother or sister’s feeling who inadvertently sees their new brother.

 

In front of  older  brother or sister who are very jealous, mothers should sometimes avoid feeding a new baby, and mothers should avoid holding and loving younger brother in front of the older brother or sister as much as possible. However, you must be careful not to keep the child who has seen his new brother away from parents or family members.

 

Fathers and mothers must love and take full care of the older brothers and sisters who have seen their new siblings more than before.

 

Children who see the new brother may feel rejected by their parents, especially if the mother overprotects his new sibling.

 

Children with emotional anxiety and hostility are more envious.

 

He sometimes envies his new brother in order to continue to receive more from his parents’s the pleasures, benefits, and rights he has received from his parents.

 

They may  bite, push, hit and pinch their new siblings, wish that younger brother is no longer exist, and instead of showing outward jealousy to their babies, they act aggressively, negatively, and regressive, and some children kick and destroy toys.

 

We must prevent this jealousy by letting us know that we will have a new baby brother during pregnancy and that the baby will not take away your rights and interests and that we will continue to love you and take care of you by words and actions.

 

This jealousy can go away gradually, but it usually does not go away completely. Also, please consult with the pediatrician after receiving medical examination treatment. If you have more questions, please contact me again. Thank you.

 

Lee Sang-won,MD

 

“Thank you. Jealousy, love, constipation, milk intake” is an example of online pediatric health counseling questions and answers.

 

Q&A. Thank you. Jealousy, love, constipation, cow milk intake

 

1. Hello, thank you for the answer to the last respiratory arrest attack.

 

I am the mother of two boys.

I’m a plastic surgery nurse, and my husband works for cultural center facility management.

The children are raised by my natural mother at my house.

Of course, we live all together at my home.

All children are sleeping at my mother’s bedroom.

The older one is four years old (37 months).

The little one is two years old (24 months).

The years old son has a history of respiratory arrest attacks.

When my eldest child was 25 months old, I had my younger son, and it was too much for elder son “I’m sorry” about the younger son.

Right now, he is doing the same thing. He still beat his brother, push and pinch, and if I carry youger son on my back, he ask me to pick him up too.

This time I am writing because of my big kid. If he is going to go to bed at night, he will ask for milk bottle a so-called “mamma bottle” and try to eat and sleep on the milk bottle. Even he ask me to feed him at on my lap. I’m too tired to even hug and feed.

And he used to always eat that way even at dawn.

If I don’t give it, he has been crying for too long until so far. And he ate about 1 liter of milk a day, but I wonder if that’s okay.

He is taller than other kids at same age now.

His height is similar to kids about 6 years old.

It weighs 18 kg.

During the day, he has toilet training, but he wet still  while sleeping, so he wears diapers and sleep.

He is constipated because he ate too much milk (plain milk).

It is very hard stool once a day because it is too hard and the lump is large.

Thank you so much for the opportunity to consult like this.

I read the contents in the “Childcare Column” .

The concern and love for children seems to be conveyed as it is.

I once again thought about the role of parents and my love and actions for my children.

 

And I didn’t know the answer would come so quickly.

Thank you for many things

 

I made a mistake and entered this title twice.

Sorry.

 

1. Hojung

 

Hello. Thanks for the great question.

 

The more information you know about your child’s age, gender, past medical history, family medical history, medical examination findings, and clinical examination, the more helpful it is to give you better an answer. I will respond based on the information you provided.

 

Thank you for writing a good article and positively acknowledging my homepage.

 

We believe that when raising our children, we, all take good care of them and love them by providing them with a sufficient supply of what they need-food, clothes, sleeping home, health, sleep, love, education, toys, etc.

 

But children desperately need real love – without condition – other than to do so. In addition, health and sufficient sleep are essential.

 

That’s right.

 

Children who grow up with such love, look good and act worthy of us.

 

And only if they receive enough true love without condition, they are less envious of their younger brothers or older brothers, and if they are angry with them, they can properly express their anger.

In today’s very active day-to-day life, it is not difficult to give them enough of the most important thing – true unconditional love.

 

How upset would be when older brother think that a new brother took  his mother and father?

 

How heartbreaking would it be when my beloved husband was taken by one of my friends?

 

The examples in these two cases are not exactly the same, but the “love deprived” itself is almost the same.

 

Many mothers did not even think about this, but were pregnant, went to the hospital, gave birth anthe theybrought the new younger brother home, and ignored the older brother.

 

It was so wrong not to be considerate of the older brother to see his or her new brother from the time you were pregnant or even before you became pregnant.

 

Perhaps I did.

 

When the child thinks that all of his love has been taken away from his new brother, he seems to express his anger through so-called aggressive  behaviors, such as pushing and hitting his new brother and drinking milk from a milk bottle.

 

It’s a bigger problem if this angry child expresses his anger passively and aggressively without saying anything, not hitting his new brother, or yelling instead of expressing his anger with this type of behavior.

 

I’m glad I can see that the child is angry.

 

If you talk with focused attention love, you will see why the child is angry.

 

And if you bring that child to me, I have a medicine that I prescribe.

 

Do you know what the name of the drug is.

 

I believe everyone who has visited my homepage already knows.

 

It is “UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

 

Get an examination at your pediatrician and talk about this problem. If you have more questions, please contact me again. Thank you. Lee Sang-won,MD.

 

52.How to choose medicine for treatments…435

 

The following is an example of an online pediatric and adolescent health counseling question and answer on “Is broccoli good for the health of a 13-month-old baby?”

 

Q&A. Is Broccoli Good For The Health Of A 13 Month Old Baby

 

1. Hello I am the mother of a 13 month old boy.

 

This is the story I heard from a friend. They say that broccoli is good for a child, and they boil in water with broccoli to feed with the child’s formula. I want to know how it helps my son’s health.

 

Oh yeah!

My child had unusually frequent diarrhea, and when he ate formula, he often vomited and breastfed for up to 9 months.

 

1. Hyo-nim Jeong

 

Hello. Thanks for asking. That’s a good question.

 

The more information you give about your child’s age, gender, past medical history, family medical history, medical examination findings, and clinical examination, the more helpful it is to give you better an answer. I will answer based on the information you provided.

 

“When taking medication, keep the following in mind and choose the most appropriate medication.”

 

When taking medications, doctors first select medications that are considered to have no side effects, are the most effective, easy to use, inexpensive, and safe.

 

When drug treatment will be done, the drug treatment did not cause side effects, and it was judged that the drug was effective and easy to use and inexpensive.

It was judged safe and therapeutic when using the drug, but most doctors don’t use it right away, and very few doctors use it right away, or use it with a rare preference instead of another.

 

While research even has proven to be a safe and useful drug, there are some drugs that most doctors do not prescribe well because there is still not enough clinical experience with them.

 

There is no research literature that has been proven to be therapeutically useful, and there are drugs that doctors do not use because treatment with the drug can cause adverse side effects.

 

When the doctors prescribe some  medication for the patient,  the doctor prescribed medication with taking into account the above medication selection method.

 

When prescribing a drug, it is a rule to choose the best drug from 1-5 methods to treat it.

 

When parents give any food to younger children, such as when a doctor prescribes medication to a patient, parents believe that food can be fed to their children in much the same way a doctor prescribes medication to a patient.

 

I am not sure about the nutritional composition, pharmacological action, side effects, and health benefits of “Broccoli”. And I’ve never read the literature on it, so I’m sorry I can’t help.

 

I haven’t seen any doctors recommend that children eat a lot of that food.

 

Broccoli is known as a type of vegetable containing vitamin C, fiber, iron and moisture.

 

For reference, formula is a food that can be fed to infants instead of breast milk, and the formula is a food prepared almost similar to the ingredients of breast milk.

 

In addition, I think that giving the broccoli juice to infants and children is harmful to the baby as described in Section 5 above.

 

If you have any good literature on broccoli juice, I would be very grateful if you could send it to me. Consult your baby’s pediatrician about this problem.

If you have more questions, please contact me again. Thank you. Lee Sang-won, MD.

 

 

53. You don’t have to pursue happiness. Make it come to you…….436

 

• Always think positively.
• Live without anything that tries to destroy the happiness that always comes to you.
• Always try to live a more satisfying life.
• Always live with less stress and the way you live.
• Live by fighting the things that are trying to hinder your always more enjoyable life.
• Always try to help others.
• Live always loving yourself and loving others.
• Know how to forgive and live with forgiveness.
• If you are wrong, admit your fault and live by asking for forgiveness.
• Don’t spare the compliment that he did really well.
• Live with an attitude of asking what your opinion is when you need it.
• Ask if there is anything you can help other with, and live with your help.
• Live with gratitude for both big and small things.
• Live by loving your parents, siblings and neighbors.
• Prevent it with an one cent and do not try to solve with millon dolors for after  care
• All have happiness

 

 

54.From parental control for teenage child to trust-based self-control ….423Here, teenage children mean children belonging to the age range of approximately 13 to 19 years, and adolescent children mean children belong to the age group where puberty begins and ends.

In terms of age, adolescent children are called  belong to age group from 8 to 9 at the earliest to 21 at the latest are called adolescents.

 

The fetus growing in the mother’s womb is fully supplied with oxygen, nutrients, and immune bodies from the mother through the umbilical cord, and fetal excretion is sent to the mother through the umbilical cord for processing, while the fetus is fully dependent on the mother for growth and development to be.

 

Adolescence is the period of transition between childhood and adulthood. It is generally considered to start with

puberty, during which sexual maturation occurs and adolescents go through a spurt in growth. In many children, however,

puberty actually begins during the stage called pre-adolescence, which covers the ages 11 to 12 years.

Puberty may begin before adolescence

, but it usually continues for several years, well into the adolescent stage, which ends during the late teens. Besides the physical changes of

puberty adolescence is also a time of significant cognitive and psychosocial changes. Many of these changes continue through the end of

adolescence after most of the physical changes of puberty have already taken place.

 

 

Upon birth, the umbilical cord, which was the mother-fetus connection, no longer exists, and the baby is no longer completely dependent on the mother and becomes a human independent from the mother.

 In other words, the baby can no longer receive all of the essential life-sustaining necessities such as oxygen, nutrients, and immune systems through the umbilical cord.

 

However, the baby is provided with essential human necessities such as love, food, clothing, and shelter from parents during the growth and development period from newborn to infancy, school age, and puberty to adulthood, and receive vaccinations to prevent various infectious diseases and prevent safety accidents. When receiving, they live indirectly and directly dependent on their parents.

 

As they grow up from infancy and school-age to their teens, pre-teens are trained according to the rules set by the parental control base for child rearing, and then gradually act with self-control based on trust as they grow up into teens.

 

The question is how many privileges and freedoms should be granted when starting to grant privileges and freedoms to teenage children to act with self-control based on trust.

 

Because pre-teens are inexperienced with how children behave and how to grow and develop, almost all of their actions and freedoms are decided and controlled by their parents.

 

It is normal for teenage children to exercise self-control, trying to exercise their own decision-making power, trying to avoid being controlled by their parents more and more when they become an older teenager and instinctively desire to be independent.

 

All parents hope there will be no shock among their teens when it comes to these changes in their teens’ ability to seek independence.

 

First of all, parents must understand that the desire for independence can normally arise in teenage children, prepare for it, and act smoothly with them.

 

Teens who like or don’t like their teens gradually becoming independent from their parents

 

Children will go out completely independent from their parents as they reach adulthood through adolescence.

 

Before adulthood, parents need to properly control the degree of their teenage children’s independence seeking power while their teenage children gradually become independent, and the degree of growth and development and intellectual maturity of the child’s physical, mental, psychological and social life.

Parents  need to adjust the degree to which teenage children can become independent. Parents should gradually grant independence, privileges, and freedoms to their teenage children based on their trust-based and self-control.

 

Most teenage children try to test their parents’ trust-based self-control based on how unconditionally and truly love them.

 

Therefore, there arises a question of whether parents should be given a range of self-control based on a trust foundation that is fair, generous, rational, logical, and sequentially fit, or whether to strictly establish the range of parental control.

 

Parents, how would you decide to control your teenage children based on trust-based self-control?

 

Regardless of the limits set for trust-based self-control, teenage children sometimes violate or fail to comply with the limits and rules of their self-control. What’s more, if the rules of trust-based control are so tightly restricted, most teens will challenge them and find ways to get out of it and seek some other way to pursue independence. And teenage children’s will also try to break those strict rules.

 

What You Should Know: Regardless of how rigid or tolerant the trust-based control rules are while crossing the adolescent bridge, many teens have a temperament to break them. Therefore, very strict and limited rules are set from the outset to help teenage children seek independence from trust-based self-control.

 

Next time, when parents  can trust their child to be able to act appropriately according to your independence seeking maturity, it is advisable for parents to gradually increase their trust-based self-control and give the child more and more appropriate privileges and freedoms.

 

In other words, the privileges that teenage children can be given can be determined by how much parents can trust their children in trust-based self-control. As children show appropriate behavior, parents increase their privileges to their children. In other words, rather than granting a lot of privileges from the start, the teen is stretched according to the degree to which they can perform trust-based self-control.

 

It is better to give less privileges at first and then gradually increase according to the degree of self-control than to stand in a position of giving many privileges at first and then gradually decreasing them.

 

The relationship between parents and teenage children gets better when they are in a more positive position.

On the contrary, it is more uncomfortable when standing in a negative position. In particular, when a teenage child is just beginning the life of adolescent child, that is, when the teenage child is just beginning social life, the parents are in a position of limiting privileges, and then have the space to stand in a positive position. By doing so, parents can be good parents.

 

You can stand in a position that is generous, rational, and understandable. It’s easy to become a bad parent if you give too many privileges to your teenage children who are just starting a complicated social life, raise them with very little restrictions, and then limit them further according to the results. The extent of trust-based self-control that has been established is likely to cause a lot of damage to the family as well as the child.

 

It is important to make the rules of conduct from a positive standpoint where possible. It would be better to be in a position to give gradually more and more privileges and freedoms to your teenage children.

 

The privileges that teenage children can have depend on their abilities, but parents need determination.

 

All teens need control from their parents, and I’ve heard many times complaining that their parents don’t love them because they don’t give them trust-based self-control.

 

Sauce; Raise your teenage sons and daughters like this by Ross Campbell / Translated by Lee Sang-won

Experience the consequences of trust-based self-control

Another factor to consider when training your teen to grow up, become an adult, have a normal conscience and learn to behave responsibly is experiencing the consequences of the teen’s own behavior. In other words, you must experience positive consequences for appropriate and responsible behavior and negative consequences for inappropriate and irresponsible behavior.

These results should be consistent and fair, and should be based on their own actions and results, not on how parents feel at the moment. Now we once again see the importance of making decisions, not based on parental control and parental spontaneous feelings.

Let’s take one of the most difficult problems of dating, for example.

Jin-i, my daughter, wanted to go on a date at the age of 12. I knew that dating was simply meeting a boyfriend.

Still, I and my wife thought it was too young to date at that age. There must be a reason for setting a rule. Teenage children also have the right to know why they set rules. The reason should be with practical and simple educational aspects. It is common for teenage children to question the rules set by their parents and their values.

At this time, for teenagers, practical rules are more important than didactic rules. One of the reasons many teenage children today turn their backs on spiritual values ​​is that certain rules and/or restrictions have so many instructive reasons. The reason they are rebellious, challenging, and prone to hostility in making parental decisions is that they don’t explain the real reasons well.

Once you’ve given a good reason, it makes no sense to have more debates with your teen about the reasons.

Let me go back to Jinyi’s date, I  told her she can date it at least four years later. When  she asked why not, I explained that in this world it is important to be able to perform his or her role well within the group, and that the age at which the child learns to play a good role within the group is early in puberty.

It also explained that early adolescent children aged 12 to 14 have never learned to perform their roles well within the group, so there are many cases of being crippled by the city society.

I said in a solemn tone that I did not want you to be crippled. Jin-i explained that it would be right for me to start with my role in the group and then engage in social activities, including dating. Then, a year later, Jin-i said that she learned the role in the group and performed well. I and her mother admitted it.

Being well performed in one’s role in the group has shown that simply getting along with everyone else is not enough. Being able to perform well within the group also indicated that it made a positive and constructive contribution within the group. He also said that the parties or groups should have an impact on each other.

I pointed out that Jin-i was more fragrant from other people than that she influenced other children. I am grateful that Jin-i has since developed leadership within her group and, if gentle, is friendly and kind, and has also been able to demonstrate leadership in social groups other than church activities.

■ Protecting teens when teens have trust-based self-control

Parents with teenage children need to communicate well with other parents who have their  teenage children. In particular, it is necessary to get along smoothly with the parents of their teenage children who are closest to my teenage children. Parents shared the necessary information and worries with the other parents who have teenage children in presenting a career path to my teenage children and controlling them on the basis of trust.

My daughter Jin-i was invited several times to social gatherings we never knew about, and we were able to call the parents of her teenage friends to see if the meeting was appropriate. Whenever there is such a meeting, our parents should not hesitate to call each other to find out which questions arise about who is hosting the meeting.

Many parents today not only lend themselves to the immoral and destructive effects they have on young people, but are actively encouraging them to do so.

Don’t be afraid to call other parents or event sponsors to find out the scope of activity at the event my teen is going to take place. If not, who can adequately control and protect their teenage children?

When other teenage children asked their parents who was the organizer of the event due to the problem of my teenage children, the parents felt very happy and even greeted them very much.

When I heard that my parents really appreciate me for caring to know what was going on with my children, I was very happy. Thank God that there are still positive parents in this world who love others and want to guide them right.

On the contrary, when Jin-i was 15, she was invited to a party. I called the child’s friend’s mother, who was about to hold the party. This is a personal party. Your daughter has been invited, so it’s up to her to come and go. She said, “you don’t care what I do at my party. I decided that it was inappropriate fort he group of teenage kids in the house. I then asked for more details about the party.

Finally, the mother became angry and told me that the teens would drink wine and cocktails in an obscene and stimulating atmosphere.

Today, both East and West, teenagers under the supervision of adults cannot be safe for that they can act soundly. I alone must not jeopardize the well-being of my children, a sincere personality, a happy marriage, a spiritual fellowship. I said this is one of the reasons why I or your mother don’t go to bars or discos. I believe in myself, but I cannot guarantee that I can overcome any temptation.

I said that Ji -ni truly appreciates your exemplary behavior.

Still, you cannot deal with such specific situations by yourself.

People who can think correctly told me that this is a situation that should be avoided.

■ Relevance and reliability of trust-based self-control in parental total control

Parents need to keep in mind two points in training their teenage children with trust-based self-control:

First, the range of behavior of teenage children should be allowed according to the degree of trust-based self-control.

Second, before allowing  teenage children to have  the specific privilage, to br sure they have grown and developed enough to handle those specific situations.These two seem to contradict each other, but they are not.

Too many parents confuse this.

Parents are confused with the relevance of deciding what kinds of privileges will be granted to their teenage children under trust-based self-control.

Trust-based self-control can be used by parents to determine what kinds of privileges are granted to their teens.

However, sometimes it can fail to determine the situation and its relevance.

Don’t assume that parents don’t trust their teens to see the situation and appropriateness.

Even though your teenage children are trustworthy and they are favorable and have good expectations, they are not mature enough to handle any situation appropriately.

As a result, they may be in a difficult situation to confront.

To cope with these cases, parents must protect their teenage children.

For example, suppose your daughter Jin-i was invited to a party.

Jin-i was a daughter whose parents trusted, and it was her true intention to behave properly. However, in terms of age, she was too young to be invited and was not mature, so it was difficult to deal with them well.

When I said that she couldn’t go to the party, the kid proudly asked why not. She said cautiously, pointing out that she has been exemplary so far and knows how to behave appropriately in the future, and that she herself will certainly be able to be exemplary and appropriate at that part  meeting, and that my dad will trust me.

Then I replied that I was totally right about what you said.

I was proud of Jin-i and you knew I could trust her, but at this invited party, Jin-i was under pressure and wasn’t ready and able to deal with all the situations that would arise. I thought there was no.

I also told my daughter that I was an ordinary person who, like everyone else, could be tempted at times, even though I thought I was good and reliable.

I believe in myself, but I can’t absolutely guarantee that I can overcome any temptation. I could trust Jin-i, but I thought that my daughter wasn’t ready to cope with certain situations yet.

I told my daughter that this is a situation that should be avoided if you have the right mind.

■ Establish limits in transition from parental control to trust-based self-control

It is of great interest to the extent to which the limits of control should be limited for teenage children who commit misconduct based on trust-based self-control.

Like younger children, teenagers are sensitive to parental fairness. Their parents just stay away from their poor delinquent

When training a teenage child with a health disorder with trust-based self-control

 

If parents are struggling to raise their teenage children with true unconditional love and train them to trust-based self-control, the teenage children may have serious health problems. In that case, you need help from other experts.

 

When teenage children have health problems such as depression, thinking disorders, emotional disorders, neurological disorders, and personality disorders, it is difficult for parents to control their teenage children’s behavioral problems based on trust.

 

Teenagers with these health problems can’t properly express their anger.

 

It may be difficult for teenagers to have trust-based self-control because the behavior of teenage children occurs among families and is a complex problem.

 

If you cannot trust-based self-control of behavioral problems due to health problems in teens, you should seek professional help immediately.

 

 

■ How to help late-adolescent teenagers’ trust-based self-transmitting

 

Even as adolescent children normally act from parental control to trust-based self-control, seek independence, and normally fall away from their parents, they help them emotionally, and economically from their parents to cross the unstable adolescent bridge into adulthood. They need to keep receiving.

 

Parents should strive to help their teenage children who cross the adolescent bridge more emotionally and mentally than ever before.

 

Parents should make sure that their teens have learned how to facilitate an independent life in adulthood as they approach adulthood.

 

In particular, it is good to go to summer camp on their  own without parents during summer vacation, or to visit relatives far away for a certain period of time while leaving thire  parents and living alone without parents.

 

In fact, children need to continue to be trained to take care of themselves while crossing the adolescent bridge and from birth to adulthood.

 

Whether teenage children can wash and wear clothes while living alone, away from their parents, whether they can cook and eat properly, to maintain their best health, and whether they can economically calculate according to their income and expenses and live properly , parents, siblings, relatives, relatives, etc. should be taught whether to send cards and greet them on special days or events.

 

Some teenage children eat instant food every day after leaving their parents, eventually leading to vitamin deficiency and malnutrition.

 

It takes time to help adolescents solve problems that can arise when their teens live independently. These things are never naturally known. Some teenage children who go to college may not be able to attend the first class in the morning.

 

Habits that persist throughout life take on a certain shape during late puberty. Before teenage children become adults, most adult traits and personalities are formed by the late teens, but that can still change.

 

Parents should do the best to help their teens develop good personalities and improve undesirable personalities.

 

sauce; Raise your teenage sons and daughters like this by Ross Campbell

 

55.Humanity Education and Humanity Education Check-lists 432

 

 

Sause:‘Raise your sons and daughters with unconditional real  love and  humanity education such as, by Dr. John S Lee ‘,  2016 ,Yangseogak , Korea

 

What is humanity education, and when and who should do followings in your life  

 

• Love youself
• Love your parents, brothers and sisters, neighbors,
• Respect your parents
• You should feel no shame when you are looking up the heaven and look around the earth
• Able to help others
• So that to live with good intelligence, health. virtue, and with sound healthy self-esteem and pride
• It can be defined as humanity education to educate myself  to become a member of a productive society.
• There are no perfect people and no perfect parents in this world.
• Is there any one who is without sinning ?
• There is no one perfect person in this world who lives without sin.
• However, it can be said that the course of humanity education is to study so that you can live very close to it and receive education so that you can live close to it.
• Their home is the first school to provide humanty education for children, and mothers and fathers
• It can be said that parents  are the first primary teachers to teach children’s humanity education.

 

• After parents, school teachers and leaders of the society and the naton can be thought of as secondary teachers of humanity education for the people as well as growing children and adolescents.
• It is a kind of prenatal education that allows the fetus to grow mentally and physically healthier after the fetus conceived by a planned marriage and fetus grows in the womb and is born. In other words, prenatal education belongs to one kind of humanity education.

 

• The mother and father of the unborn child should love each other unconditionally as a couple and as a mother and father in the future and become a teacher of humanity education for their children.
• The head of the fetus in the uterus is normally directed downwards in the uterus, but can sometimes be directed upwards. The fetus grows in the amniotic fluid.The fetus is protected by amniotic fluid so that the wall of the uterus does not press on the fetus. The total amniotic fluid is replaced with a new one 8 times a day.

 

 

 

.

A uterus pictures with the fetus

 

a-uterine wall, b-placenta, c-umbilical cord, d-ovary, e-fetus, f-amniotic fluid,

g-cervix, h-vagina, i-cervix

Source–-Carnation Company-“Illustrations from Pregnancy in Anatomical” and Pediatric Home Nursing Encyclopedia.

 

• Take adequate physical and mental exercise and rest, get enough rest to avoid fatigue, and eat the pure foods which are not to exposure to various chemicals harmful to the human body. This is one kids of humanity education for the fetus.
• And eat a nutritious and balanced diet, take vitamins, do not look disgusting thing, do not hear unpleasant and harmful sounds, do not consume a drop of alcohol during pregnancy for your fetus in the woom.

 

• Do not smoke, do not expose to secondary smoking, and give humanity education to the fetus growing in the womb. Do not take drugs not prescribed by your doctor for the fetus in the woom.

 

 

• Dad kissing a fetus growing in the belly of his pregnant wife. Prenatal health care itself is the beginning of humanity education which prevents infectious diseases and gives birth to a healthy baby through good prenatal health care according to the doctor’s instructions.

 

• On the day the newborn child is born, the mother and father hold the bloody baby who was just born at  the birth place, give eye contact love, shout out loud, “I love you,” “I lovee you,” and hug the blood-red baby, giving physical contact love and eye contact love again. It is necessary to form a parent-newborn baby love bonding with mom and dad and newborn baby.

 

• Humaniy education can be given as the way his or her fathers and mothers give unconditional true love to the newborn son or daughter right after they are born.

 

May I introduce these days-some context on  Korean children and adolescents (0-18 years old) collected from various media.

Some of the context are as following introduced here.

 

• “Over 100,000 youth run away from home annually”.
• Something went wrong.
• 370,000 youth were out of school. Half of them whereabout were not known reported  on 8 31, 2015
• “More than 10,000 youth commited suicide annually”.
• “About 5-6 thousand teenage girls a year become single mothers.”
• “In every other house, one child  grows up under single mother due to divorce, bereavement, and social separation for convenience.
• “More than 19,000 orphans grow up in the orphanage ”.
• “They said “Schools collapse and classrooms collapse.”

 

• “Lovely, innocent and precious children are called as “disgusting children”, “alien”, or “fearless children”
• “Sometimes a student hits a teacher or hits a parent”.
• “In particular, bullying and school violence have become common place, and constant harassment, and physical violence have become common.
• There is widespread insensitivity to violence, which is considered insignificant even if exercised.”
• Even after receiving more than 60 reference books for raising children from other countries, there was no a letter saying “thank you” from  the local county leaders who received.
• “The “life satisfaction feeling” of Korean children and youth is the worst among the 26 countries of the World Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD). It was the lowest.”
• The “subjective happiness index” was also the lowest among Korean students.
• Young people leaving the country “because they hate Korea”
• ‘Family collapsed due to the recession.
• Surviving crime surge’
• Unfortunately, nowdays this kind  trend is almost the same for children and adolescents around the world, including the United States.

 

Every day, these things were happening to teenagers in Iowa, USA.

 

• 2753 are pregnant,
• 7742 have sex,
• 1287 births reported,
• Of the newborns born to them, 53 died,
• 5 teenagers commit suicide,
• 21 people died from alcohol,
• 78 children abused in Iowa, USA,
• 1 baby is born to a 12 year old girl,
• 8 babies are born to teenage girls,
• One person commited suicide every 8 minutes,
• Twenty students droped out of school.
• About half of adolescent children aged 12-14 in the United States have a bomb (binge)drink party,
• It is said that 72% of 18-year-olds and 20-year-olds had a bomb drink party.

 

Source: American Pediatric Society News AAP News 9,2015

 

In the Eastern  country with moral, Courtesy standard

 

It’s difficult to find the “Do”, it’s difficult to find “Ri”,

It is difficult to find “Ye, and it’s difficult to find “Jel”,

It was difficult to find “Ae” and  it was difficult to find “Chung”.

It is difficult to find a loving relatives and it’s difficult to find  a loving brothers and siters,

It was difficult to find trust and righteousness.

It is difficult to find the filial piety and it is difficult to find righteousness,

It was hard to find friendship and trust.

It is difficult to find students who are all teachers, who want to teach but every  want to teacher , there is no one to learn.

They all seem to be Indian chiefs, and it’s hard to find Indians

There were many “sagongs” on the boat and there was no “fisherman”

They only talk a lot, not rational, logical, or reasonable.

It is difficult to find the truth of politeness, modesty, frugality.

It is difficult to find the “Jang Yu-Yu U Ser” 長幼有序.

It’s hard to find neither real modest nor unconditional love.

It is difficult to find a person who is grateful for all events, and no one says “Thank you” even if they give special gifts.

It is difficult to find a person who praises other for doing well,

Children sent thire elderly parents to  an unfamiliar elder nursing home from the sweet home in their hometown where parents have lived in thire whole life.

Theye said loudly that she was preparing.

It was difficult to find any relatives who welcomed the brother who came from Chulri-manri.

Wherever I went, I couldn’t find anyone reading a book.

When I go to the doctor, he do it all, but the mayor said why I have to read the medical parenting reference book.

In the United States, even if a child and adolescent had at least 15 to 30 minutes to undergo a health check-up in a pediatric and adolescent clinic, no one would agree that it was true.

One or two years old infants ate while walking alone with a bottle in their mouth.

There are 17,000 cases of child abuse per year.

7 out of 10 Koreans say they distrust the government

Moreover, I haven’t seen a single person who gives thanks for living while receiving genuine love and blessings. July 2015

 

Humanity Educational must be done  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

The humanity education check-list is divided into 1 to 8 catagories.

 

The most content is from “Raise your sons and daughters with unconditional real love and humanity  education such as” by Dr. John Sangwon Lee, MD., published by Yangseogak publisher)

 

Create a humanity education table for parents and your children

 

In the box on the right side of each subject for humanity education, please write down the year, month, and date when the parents gave humanity education at  according to the child’s age and growth and maturity level.

 

It would be good to create a national system such as to submit the  mandatory humanity education  list done by their parents for their children with an application form when entering elementary school, junior high school, high school, and college admission.

 

For reference, humanity education records are irrelevant to deciding admission to school, but how about considering them as necessary documents for admission?

 

Each country, each family, each individual, various schools, children’s personality, constitution, age, maturity, etc., appropriate humanity education are needed.

 

Parents and children receive humanity education appropriately.

Please refer to the information about humanity education in’Raise your sons and daughters with unconditional real love and humanity such as and the Bible, Budism, Ethesis, and Myunsim-bo-gam and others.

 

Parents must give their children each section of humanity education at least three times.

 

• List good humanity education topics on the following humanity education check-list. For convenience, there are many overlapping topics and content.

 

• humanity education check-list 1, humanity education 2,  humanity education 3 , and so on 8.

 

• The age or day of the humanity education given in the remarks

 

Humanity Education Check-list 1 

 

• Pregnant womb is the first humanity education classroom, while the pregnant women and fathers are the first teachers of humanity education for their children.
• Get pregnant by planning.
• Do not drink any kind of alcohol or a drop of alcohol during pregnancy.
• Don’t drink a drop of alcohol when you plan to get pregnant soon.
• Do not smoke at all during pregnancy.
• Do not use any kind of medicine other than drugs prescrived by your doctor
• When using prescription medications, check before using them to see if they can harm your woom baby.
• During pregnancy, receive regular pregnancy education and pregnancy health checkups.
• To prevent infectious diseases that can occur to pregnant women before or during pregnancy, the vaccine is given in a timely manner.
• Get adequate vaccinations to prevent infectious diseases from occurring to the fetus during pregnancy or to babies born after childbirth.
• During pregnancy, take adequate rest and eat well-balanced food.
• Peace of mind and  in the human body. Eat plenty of balanced foods.  Get ready to breastfeed.
• Pregnant women do not see, do not hear, and do not touch anything that is gross and unsightly.
• Especially during pregnancy, couples make unconditional love a lot.
• Father to give  loves the baby in the womb during pregnancy.
• During childbirth (delivery), the father is with the giving birth wife and helps the childbirth.
• Mom and dad hug the blood-red newborn baby and make the love bonding between the dad, the mom and the baby.
• The mom and the dad are the first and greatest teachers of humanity education to teach growing children to become adults with the best intellectual abilities, and the each child home is a lifelong humanity education classroom.
• If parents can not manage their family well, parents can’t control their  neighborhood.
• Home education is the basis of all humanity education.
• Mother and father are partners in life, they must love each other, care for and forgive each other, and have friendship and forgiveness between brothers and sisters.
• Humanity education for children’s lifelong education can not be given by only outside the home.
• Parents must raise their children with true unconditional love and care.
• Mom and dad raise their children to the best of their ability. Sometimes they also sacrifice.
• You can get better education and better humanity education from harmonious mothers and fathers in a healthy home.
• Mom and Dad should always be ready to help their children when they need it.
• The society and the school can have a great influence on making humanity educatin by directing humanity education to growing children indirectly, but the family serves humanity education as well as society.
• Parents should strive to provide their children with the best food, clothing, shelter, love humanity education and health care.
• Teach them how to brush teeth correctly after eating three meals a day.
• It helps to possess a good intellectual body from birth.
• Children are the mirror of the home, parenting  and the mirror of the society.
• Parents need to adequately supply the basic necessities of human beings, food, clothing, shelter, health, and love, so that their children receive good humanity education.
• Both parents, mother and father must provide consistent home humanity education.
• Set a regular bedtime and wake-up time.
• Teach proper eating habits.
• Teach them the habit of politely greeting to others and the elder.
• Teach them to keep their room, house, or place of work organized.
• Teach them to love and be close to their neighbors.
• Teach the habit of dressing properly.
• Teach them to do their best in their job.
• teaches them help others.
• Make a fine and beautiful habit.
• Teach them to greet their parents when they leave the house to go out or return from outside.
• Teach them to speak and act politely.
• When giving things to others, teach them to give politely with both hands.
• Teach them to greet them outside the door when guests arrive and teach them how to greet them when they go outside the door.
• Teach that the right words come from the right heart.
• It is taught that the words of Goeun come from the heart of Goeun.
• Teach  that white lies should not be made.
• Teach them not to even white lies.
• Teach them to use a lot of words of honor, good words, polite words, and polite words.
• Teach others not to say anything offensive.
• Of three meals a day, breakfast is the best meal, and breakfast and dinner are eaten with the whole family together as possible.
• When eating at home, seniors sit first and then sit in order.
• If seniors holds the spoon first, then the spoon is held in order.
• Do not make any noise during meals.
• Just because something tastes good for you, you don’t eat it first, don’t eat a lot, or finish alone.
• Don’t stand  up first after eating.
• If it is unavoidable, you get patience when you have to get up first.
• Wash your hands before eating. After eating, say goodbye and say thank you.
• Helps parents and assists with household chores.
• Teach senior citizen etiquette.
• After going to the bed and getting up, you can make your futons and at least clean and tidy your room.
• Teach them to clean the dishes after eating.

 

Humanity Education Check-list 2

• Teach them to clean the house
• Teach them to do garbage removal
• Teach them to care for livestock.
• Teach them to develop a spirit of cooperation.
• Teach to plant flowers to grow.
• Teach how to plant, grow, and reap vegetables or grains.
• Teach them to serve well in the sweet home where their parents lived and to be filial and not to spend the rest of their lives in Nursing Home, Yangnowon
• Teach them to keep the traffic rules in order.
• Teach them to keep their turn when getting on and off.
• Teach them not to throw tissue paper anywhere.
• Teach them to use the bathroom clean. And teach them to wash their hands cleanly after.
• Teach them to keep their promises and keep the promised time.
• Teach them to be respectful in words and to act so as not to offend others.
• Teach them to dress so that they are not disrespectful.
• Teach them not to lie when they answer a phone call and teach them to give the recipient’s name.
• Also teach them to shop the grocery at the market
• Teach them not to harm the somebody’s rights and interests of others.
• Teach them not to cause inconvenience to others.
• Teach them not to live selfish.
• Teach them to develop a habit of being nice for each other and giving way.
• Teach them to cultivate a sense of merit.
• Teach them that they  should not be lazy about learning.
• Parents should not neglect their usual manners.
• Parents also read and study a lot of good parenting books.
• Home is a school that teaches etiquette to growing children.
• Parents are etiquette teachers.
• Teach them to be kind and do good.
• Teach that being kind to others is the best way to live a happy and successful life.
• Provide adequate allowance and teach them to spend appropriately.
• Teach them how to save.
• They teach that adequate rest is as important as working hard.
• Teach them to properly relieve stress.

 

Humanity Education Check-list 3

• Teaches that we must follow the rules and order of the family and society.
• Raising children according to innate 9 natural temperament and personalities.
• Recognizing that there is a personality of 75 percentile from birth and a personality of 25 percentile, find out what percentile of personality your child has. And parents raise their children according to the child’s percentile of personality.
• Teach them not to slander others.
• Teach them not to steal.
• Teach them not to give false testimony.
• Teach them to live truthfully.
• Teach them to keep their mind and body straight.
• Teach them to speak and act politely.
• Teach them to eat table food according to procedures and order.
• Home is a school that provides lifelong humanity education.
• Parents are teachers who give children lifelong humanity education and life education.
• Teach them to be in good shape for life.
• Teach them to read and learn a lot of good books as time permits.
• Teach them to pick and read good books from the local library and others.
• It teaches to observe the beautiful family etiquette that has been passed down since the ancestors.
• It is taught that family etiquette is the basis for family humanity education.
• It should be a kindness father than a authorotive father(um-bu 嚴父).
• It teaches that you should not be rude to others.
• It teaches that it must not be spoiled.
• Lot of conversations between parents and children.
• It teaches education that accompanies knowledge and wisdom.
• Do not over educate them at a time.
• Teach family etiquette and interpersonal etiquette.
• Teach them to use a lot of respect (honours) appropriately.
• Teaches how to greet younger or older people, seniors, adults, friends, relatives, parents, siblings, and teachers.
• Teaches them not to be cocky.
• Teach them not to interfere with others’ words.
• Parents are teachers who teach their children etiquette and should take the lead in teaching them.
• In particular, mothers and fathers should be mentors of life-long etiquette education in family and society.
• Parents teach their children to be good citizen.
• Children are taught that it is common for them to learn the manners of mom and dad and show them the manners they have learned to parents or others.
• Children learn by seeing their parents’ attitudes, behaviors, and habits.
• Teach them to keep manners according to exemplary manners.
• If parents are polite and study well, it is the best for your children .
• Teaches that breaking etiquette is making great mistakes.
• Teach them not to talk in class.
• Etiquette education begins with the fetus before birth.
• Educate etiquette well from an early age and make it a habit.
• Before entering elementary school, thorough etiquette education and make it a habit.
• It is taught that lack of etiquette creates an unfortunate society.
• It is the foundation of etiquette education that parents and elderly adults have a heart to love their children and youth.
• Raise your children with true unconditional love.
• Teach them to greet their parents when they leave the house to go out or return from the day out.
• When giving things to others, teach them to give politely with both hands.
• When guests arrive, have them to greet guests outside the door and teach them how to greet them when they leave.
• It teaches that the right words come from the right heart.
• It is taught that the good words come from the good heart.
• Teach them not to even white lies in front of other.
• Teach them to use a lot of polite words, respected words, and cautigeous words , friends words.
• After meal,  teach gthem to wash the dishes.

 

Humanity Education Checklist 4

• Foster healthy self-esteem.
• Teach them to do everything thoroughly and carefully.
• Teach them to be responsible and do their best in whatever they do.
• Teach them to keep the mind, body to be clean.
• Teach them to be clean in and around the house.
• Teach them to have a spirit of unity for the group, society, and nation.
• Teach them to be good at greetings even when living in unity.
• Teach them to be humble, kind in personal relationships.
• Parents must first take exemplary initiatives and act consistently.
• The mother or father should treat their children with a consistent and compassionate attitude.
• In interpersonal relationships, parents show to say “yes, thank you,

sorry”, “please forgive me because I did something wrong”, you did a

lot of  good job”, “what can I do for you”. And teach them to say a lot

of fine words, such as complimenting other such as “that you did very well”.

 

• Teach them to say a lot of fine words, such as please, excuse me , and thank You. how are you?. excuse me and so on.
• Teach them to say a lot of fine words such as  how are you?, excuse me. thank you, sorry  in a normal casual way.
• When parents or adults go somewhere, children go out the door and say ‘goodbye’, and teach them to greet to them outside the door,  when they come back, a children go ouside the door to greet them and lead them into the house.
• Create a family based on trust and harmony.
• Teach to lead a spiritual life through Christian life or Buddhist faith life or ather religeon.
• Teach them to do their best and to do their duty.
• Teach them to read a lot of good books such as the Bible, Buddhist faith scriptures,  thesis, and Myunsimbogam, and learn ethical morality, wisdom, and wise knowledge through them to make them the basis of life.
• Teach children to remember important people’s birthdays such as parents, siblings or friends or special occasions and then say hello or send gifts or cards.
• Commemorates the first menarche or first ejaculation of your growing children.
• When selecting a future job, choose if possible according to children innate natural temperament or personality.
• Give child home sex education and school sex education.
• Educate them not to use drugs or addictive drugs.
• All vaccinations are given at the right time.
• Prevents various safety accidents.
• Visit the university where your children want to study with your child.

 

Humanity Education Checklist No. 5

• Teach them to have cleans the mind and whole body.
• Teach that honesty is important enough to influence success.
• Teach them to organize everythings in their room, the house, and around the house if possible .
• Teach them for etiquette about honesty, kindness, cleanliness, responsibility, and greetings.
• Teach them to have  responsibility and handle everything thoroughly and carefully.
• Parents first show to be exemplary in order to match what they say and do.
• Parents should admonish their children with a consistent attitude, with confidence and determination, without being emotionally biased.
• Teach them to to say approprietly yes, thank you. sorry,  please, excuse me,  how are you and so on.
• Teach the etiquette to use words such as the right time.

• Teach hem to one of the good etiquettes is to wait until the

family members come back and have dinner together if the mother or

father goes somewhere and then comes back to have dinner together.

• Parents and children build families with the virtue of trusting, reconciling, and loving each other.
• Teach them to have  the house to be clean and tidy and to be honest at all times in body and mind.
• Teach them to speak clearly so that others can clearly understand.
• Teach  them in a gentle, kind, polite, low-pitched voice.
• Teach them not to throw away trash.
• Wear a helmet when riding a bicycle.
• Teach them  to wear a seat belt when riding a car,.
• teach them to wear a life jacket when riding a boat.
• To avoid drowning, do not swim where safety guard personnel are not available.
• Observe your order when getting in and out of your car, and follow traffic rules when crossing a crosswalk.
• When you answer a call in telephon , give your name to the person to let them know who is answering. Use words such as thank you, sorry and so son and say hello, etc. properly.
• Teach them to be quiet so that you don’t usually disturb others.

• Teach them to get into the habit of listening to beautiful classical music or

other music.

 

Humanity  Education Check-list 6

• Teach them to love insects such as butterflies and ants, and pets such as dogs and cats.
• Teach them not to gossip about others.
• To teach them to do not give things or money without moderation as requested by children.
• To teach them to develop the habit of waiting and enduring.
• To teach them to eat three meals a day witht balanced foods.
• To teach them how to say hello, such as goodbye etc.
• If possible, mother, father and  siblings go for walks and exercise together.
• Everyone in the family takes time to chat together.
• Parents do not fight  in front of young children.
• Teacher them to hellow and help grandmother, grandfather, father’s and mother’s older or younger brother,  3rd, 4th, 5th cousines, etc.
• Don’t talk back to your parents or anyone above.
• Don’t tell others to do thingswhich  you don’t want to do.
• Teach them to choose good friends and make friends while keeping each other’s trust.
• Teach them to know where the roots of their parents or ancestors came from and to respect the roots of their parents or ancestors.
• In particular, teach manners to care for and greet the grandparents and other elders.
• Teach them to dress well with the neat apearace of the face, hands, feet, their head hair.
• Teach them to treat neighbors kindly and take care of them as needed.
• Regard  the other person and speak in honorifics to others.
• Teach them to do eye contact love appropriately to others.
• Raise children in love and do not train through corporal punishment.
• Often only one parent gives focused attetion love with such as going on a trip or fishing with only one child, and talks while loving and caring.
• Teach them to be considerate, compathionate of others.

 

Character Education Check- list 7

• Teach them to choose good things to give when you give something to others,
• It fosters a spirit of sacrifice.
• Meet the school teacher according to the school rules, but find out the overall state of the child’s school life.
• Teach them to listen to him eagerly when talking with a young child.
• Parents teach children sex education,  sometimes while reading sx education books on child and also adolescent sex education together.
• Don’t say anything that makes them feel inferior.
• Don’t say anything vulgar.
• Do not speak with dignity.
• Don’t unilaterally instruct your children.
• Don’t overwhelm your children.
• Don’t use a compelling tone.

·         Don’t let them to talk to you in vulgar words.

• Parents are examples of children.
• Parents are lifelong teachers  for their chidren.
• In a polite family, a polite child is born.
• Make voluntary and polite education.
• Teach them to follow the good example with showing.
• To teach them on that freedom is not just acquired.
• To teach them to try hard to get their normal shape right.
• To teach them not to do stealing.
• To teach them  not to do tax evasion, smuggling, land speculation, underground economy, and irregular entertainment business.
• Teach them not to cheat on quality or quantity.
• Teach them not to pollute the environment.
• Teach them to judge the value of good and evil in action throughout their lives.
• Teach them to distinguish between what is yours and what is theirs.
• Teach them not to wear clothes that are too expensive and to wear old clothes.
• Teach them not to ask about the age or weight of others, especially women’s age or weight.
• Teach them that children should not go anywhere without their parents’ permission.
• Don’t let only young children play at home.
• Food should not be provided to young children without their parental permission.
• When entering someone else’s room, or when you need to talk to someone in the room, quietly knock on the door and get permission to come in.
• Teach them that they should apologize for being excused when they pass by and come into contact with someone else’s body.
• Teach them to say that they have been excused when they make flatus.
• Teach them to say “thank you” or “no thank you” when someone volunteers to do something for you.
• Teach them to if possible, reuse broken objects after fixing instead of throwing them away.
• Teach them to conserve water even in public baths.
• Teach them how to do simple housework, such as hammering and sawing.
• Teach them to remove snow outside the home in winter and to mow the lawn and trim the garden in the summer.
• Instead of doing things that they are thought to be dirty and also difficulty job, such as getting rid of filth or garbage, instead of doing it myself, teach them to do it themself instead of letting others do it.
• Teaches that they cannot obtain  food, clothing, and shelter without working.
• Teach them not to avoid hard work.
• Teach people to be respectful.
• Teach them not to use things that belong to others without permission.
• It is taught to take responsibility for dating.
• Teach them to recognize other sex values.
• Identify and respect your child’s talents and aptitudes.
• Teache them to do their best as a productive worker in society with sound healthy self-esteem and pride.
• Punishment should be appropriate for wrongdoing
• Reward is consistent.
• Teache that they shouldn’t look closely at others when reading a book or opening their wallet.
• When someone whom you know is sick, teach them to visit them if possible.
• Parents shoud study the growth and development of newborns, infants, school-age, and adolescents, and provide humanity education to children according to the degree of growth and development.
• Teach your children the skills of communicating with others.
• Parents should not unilaterally engage in command instruction admonition conversations.
• The home is a moral education school, and the moral foundation of children is built in the home.
• Discard prejudice or anger by following a reasonable procedure.
• Raise your children in healthy mentally and physically.
• Teach them to obey family norms, social or school rules, or laws.
• Teach them  family is the social birthplace.
• Home education is the foundation of all children’s education.
• Knowledge and skill education is mainly done at school, and humanity  education is mainly done at home by parents and also at the their school.
• The home serves  for children to produce, share, and share love with.
• At home, they must show love and care for each other and forgiving.
• The home is the birthplace of life and the birthplace of rewarding.
• Mainly, knowledge and skill education is provided at school, and personality education is provided by parents.

 

Character Education Check-list 8

 

Teach The Golden Rule.

• Treat others as you wish to receive treatment from others.
• Love your neighbor as yourself.
• Teaches that everyone is equal.
• Do what you want others to do to please me, too.
• Just as you want others to take good care of your feelings, please take good care of others’ feelings.
• When you treat others, treat yourself as you wish to be treated.
• The Golden Rule or ethic of reciprocity is a maxim, ethical code or morality that essentially states either of the following: One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself (positive or directive form).

 

Teach what are Gandhi’s seven great sins.

• Politics without principle is sin,
• Wealth without work is sin,
• Pleasure without conscience is sin,
• Knowledge without character is sin,
• Commerce without moralityis a sin,
• Science without humanity is a sin,
• A life of faith without sacrifice is a sin.

Teach them about Gandhi’s seven great sins.

 

Teach Gunja Yu Samrak君子有三樂.

 

• 君子有三樂 而王天下 不與存焉
• 父母具存 兄弟無故 一樂也
• 仰不愧於天 俯不怍於人 二樂也
• 得天下英才而敎育之 三樂也

 

There are three kinds of pleasures for the happy succesful man,

Being the king of the world does not include it.

• The first pleasure is that both parents are alive and brothers an d sisters are well and happy,
• The second pleasure is that there is no shameful in the heaven and not ashamful in the world.
• The third pleasure is to be able to give somthing for benefit and educate others.

 

Teach the ten commandments of Moses.

• Filial piety to your parents
• Don’t kill people
• Do not commit adultery
• Do not steal
• Don’t give false testimony
• Love your neighbor as your family
• Don’t covet someone else’s wife
• Don’t covet other’s wealth

 

Sources and references

 

• Proper home education for children’s happiness Chungcheongnam-do Office of Education
• Bible
• Thesis
• Raising a teenage son and daughter like this: Ross Campbell, MD, Lee Sang-won

 

• The Book of Virtues William J. Bennett

 

• www.koreapediatrics.com and/ or www.drleepediatrics.com

 

 

• www.koreapediatrics.com (www.drleepediatrics.com)
• Sons and Daughters Love and Raise Sources and References
• Sources and references for ”Rasing your sons and daughters with unconditional real love”
• Growth and development of children by George Lowrey
• American Academy of Pediatrics, Guide to Your Child’s Sleep
• According to a study by Parmelee et al
• Robert and Parmelee-instructions for pediatric patients by Barton d. Schmitt
• Ambulatory pediatrics by Green and Haggerty
• Sleep patterns in infants from birth to 16 weeks
• Sleep disturbance by Alan Marks
• Childhood sleep disturbances and disorders of arousal by Gabor Barabas
• American Academy of Pediatrics [Guide to Your Child’s Sleep
• Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics, 15th ed
• Pediatric News, Dec 2002
• Feb. 2003 FAAP News
• Pediatric Nutrition Handbook, American Academy of Pediatrics, p44, 1993
• Michael Rothenberg, Introduction to Clinical Pediatrics
• Nelson Text Book of Pediatrics, 14th edition
• The Pediatric Clinics of North America
• The Johns Hopkins Hospital, the Harriet Lane Handbook, 15th edition
• Pediatric News, May 2002
• Pediatric Nutrition Handbook, American Academy of Pediatrics
• Pediatrics. Dec. 2006. Volume 118. Supplement 3
• Pediatrics. March. 2006. Volume 117. # 3
• Pediatric News, Nov. 2006
• FAAP News p26, June 2006
• Pediatrics. June. 2005. Volume 115. # 6
• Outcomes of Preschool Sleep Problems; Pediatrics. January. 2007. Volume 119. # 1
• 26. Infectious disease in children. April 2004 17. #4
• Bible
• Thesis

·         myeongsim bogam

• Pediatrics, Ahn Hyo-seop, Korean textbook
• Medical Glossary, English-Korean, Korean-Korean, Korean Medical Association
• The Dictionary of Medicine Lee Woo-joo, Ph.D.
• Mosby’s Medical Dictionary Jeongdam Media
• Child Health Nursing, Kang Hee-kyung co-authored book publishing Jeongdam
• Anatomical Physiology of the Human Body, David Shier and others
• How to really Love your Child, Ross Campbell, Chariot Victor Pub.
• True Child Love, Ross Campbell, Navigator
• How to really Love your Teenager, Ross Campbell, Chariot Victor Pub.
• Raise teenage sons and daughters like this, as Ross Campbell/Lee Sang-won
• Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics, Richard Behrman, M.D. and etc.
• Current Pediatric Therapy 13, Gellis and Kagan, Saunders
• Current Pediatric Therapy 6, Gellis and Kagan, Saunders
• Ambulatory Pediatrics IV, Green, and Haggerty, Saunders
• Current Therapy 1982, Conn, Saunders
• Behavior Disorders in Children, Bakwin and Bakwin, Saunders
• Behavior Pediatrics, Part I, The Pediatric clinics of North America, Aug. 2003
• Behavioral Pediatrics, Part II, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Oct. 2003, W. B. Saunders
• Children’s Environmental Health, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Oct. 2001, W. B. Saunders
• Childhood Immunizations 2000, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, April 2000, W. B. Saunders
• Violence Among Children and Adolescents, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, April 1998, W. B. Saunders
• Physical Assessment, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Feb 1998, W. B. Saunders
• Prevention in Primary Care, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Aug. 1986, W. B. Saunders
• School Health: A Guide for Health Professionals, Committee on School Health, American Academy of Pediatrics.
• State of the Art Reviews, Adolescent Injuries: Epidemiology and Prevention.
• Adolescent Medicine, Volume 6/ Number 2, 1995, Hanley & Belfus.
• Acute Pain in Children, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Aug 1989, W. B. Saunders
• Habilitation of the Handicapped Child, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Feb. 1973, W. B. Saunders
• Issues for the Practicing Pediatrician, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Aug. 1981, W. B. Saunders
• Persistent Signs and Symptoms, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Feb. 1982, W. B. Saunders
• Behavioral Pediatrics, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, Aug. 1975, W. B. Saunders
• Recent Clinical Advances, The Pediatric Clinics of North America, May 1974, W. B. Saunders
• Adolescents, Families, and Society in the New Millennium, Elizabeth Meller Alderman, M.D., Robert T. Brown, M.D., Adolescent Medicine Oct. 2001
• Care of Children in Hospitals, American Academy of Pediatrics, 1963.
• The Harriet Lane Handbook, The John Hopkins Hospital, George K. Siberry, and Robert Iannone, Mosby.
• Guide to Your Child’s Sleep, Birth through Adolescence, George J. Cohen, M.D., 1999, American Academy of Pediatrics.
• Pediatric Nutrition Handbook, American Academy of Pediatrics, 1993.
• The Nursing Mother’s Companion, Kathleen Huggins, R.N., M.S., 1986, The Havard Common Press.
• Dating, Sex & Friendship, Joyce Huggett, 1985, InterVarsity Press.
• Asking About Sex and Growing Up, Joanna Cole, 1988, Beech Tree Paperback Book.
• Preparing for Adolescence, Dr. James Dobson, 1978, Regal Books.
• Five Cries of Parents-New Help for Families on Issues the Trouble them Mest, Merton P. Strommen & A. Irene Strommen, 1985, Harper & Row.
• Stress in the Family: How to live through it, Tim Timmons, 1982, Harvest House Publishers.
• How to keep your Kids on Your Team, Charles Stanley, 1986, Thomas Nelson Publishers.
• How to Discipline Children Without Feeling Guilty, H. Clemens, Ph.D., R. Bean, Ed.M., Price/Stern/Sloan Publishers
• Good Behavior, Stephen W. Garber, Ph.D., Marianne Daniels Garber, Ph.D. & Robyn Freedman Spizin, 1987, St. Martins Paperbacks.
• Give Me an Answer that Satisfies my heart & my mind, Cliffe Knechtle, 1986, Intervarsity Press.

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