29. Masturbation

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 29. Masturbation

The external genital organ rubbed by own hands or other or rubbed against other objects to have a good feeling is called masturbation. They can feel pleasure when they touch their exogenous genital organs with their hands.

It is wrong for parents, children, or any other person to talk about personal privacy topics such as external genital organs, masturbation, sex, sexual intercourse at any time, or anywhere.

In the past, now, in Korea, in the United States, or in any other country, it is wrong to talk about personal privacy topics at any time or anywhere.

Surprisingly, sexual problems, masturbation problems, and sex problems are common in the child-rearing process, but there are not so many parents who want to seek counseling at the pediatric clinics on such sexual privacy topics.

Today, at home and at school, children learn a lot of information about sex through regular home pediatric sex education (children sex education), school regular pediatric sex education, and sex education reference books.

Various newspapers, magazines, media broadcasts, television movies, and the internet are used to indiscriminately listen to and learn a lot of information about sex, such as masturbation by children themselves.

Most school-age children and adolescents have listened to and learn about sex a lot from their peers and friends. Sexual information obtained in that way is sometimes misleading and exaggerated.

Infants and toddlers accidentally find that there is a difference in the feeling that occurs when the external genital organ is accidentally touched or when the external genital organ is touched by their body parts. After that, they may develop a habit of stimulating their external genital organs.

Most parents who first discover the male or female infants and school-age children to masturbate are embarrassed and worried about how to cope.

There is literature saying that one-week old newborns also masturbate, and there is literature that one-month-old female infants also masturbate.

It’s normal for male infants to have their penis erected upright just before they urinate, and that’s normal. It is normal for male infants to get excited and erection when they touch the penis with their hands.

In addition, it is common for a male and female child to have a pleasant feeling when the external genital organs accidentally touched.For this reason, 6-7 months old infants may touch and play with their external genital organs with their hands, and 2-year-old toddlers may feel good when he touches his or her external genital organs. For reference, not all of these acts are masturbation.

Sometimes parents, grandparents, or babysitters who watch the babies sometimes notice that the babies feel pleasure and laughing if they properly touch their external genital organs when they put their dress on or give bathe an infant. This is also normal.

Some infants and toddlers have a good feeling in the external genital organ when parents accidentally touch their external genitalia, and after that, the children touch their external genital organs by themselves and then masturbate.

Some of the school-age and adolescent children consciously masturbate by stimulating their external genital organs with their crotch or hands.

Some of them masturbate their external genitalia by rubbing against the saddle or rubbing against the bed or riding a tricycle. Some children masturbate their external genitalia by rubbing against a family member or other person while wearing clothing.

Masturbation that most children do is normal in the process of growth and development.

However, it is unusual to masturbate excessively or to masturbate by stimulating own external genital organs at any time or any place.

Infants and toddlers are curious about every aspect, especially an external genital organ.

They try to make it fun to see other children’s and adults’ personal privacy, such as the external genital organ. This is also normal.

Infants and toddlers also masturbate normally.

Both school-age children and adolescent children masturbate normally, and girls and boys also masturbate normally.

However, there are not so many good research results on masturbation, so there are not enough references for parents to refer to.

In most cases, infant masturbation behavior is normal, so it is not a good idea for parents to abruptly stop infants’ masturbation behavior.

Whether educating them that it is not right to practice masturbation in public or at any time, it is a good idea to distract them and stop masturbation indirectly.

In particular, it is a difficult problem to prevent masturbating at all, since infants and toddlers practice masturbation at any time in various ways.

When giving pediatric sex education to infants, toddlers, preschool-age children under 5 years of age, they have to educate them to be a part of privacy, and they can properly touch their external genital organs with their own hands only in the bed or the bathroom to the toilet, but not in front of parents, siblings, especially others, or in public places. Parents must educate them that they should not touch their external organs at any time in front of anybody.

If parents see infants and toddlers masturbate in front of their parents, if they do not ignore the behavior or ignore the behavior, they think that parents may allow them to do so.

However, depending on the children’s age, parents can distract them and have them stop masturbation, dress appropriately, hug, or indirectly stop masturbation through conversation.

You can stop masturbating by sending from where your child was and having them play there.

Itchy and scratching due to diaper dermatitis at the external genital organs or inflammation of the external genital organ may be mistaken for masturbating. In this case, it is better to consult their doctor.

When the children masturbate, do not punish, spank, corporal punishment, intimidate, or insult.

With proper sex education, until they reach the age of entering kindergarten, you will find that masturbation is a very private issue and one of the personal actions they should take.

Just as infants and toddlers can feel pleasure when they suck their fingers, they can feel pleasure when they touch their external genital organs with their hands. Masturbation is neither abnormal sex nor precocious sex.

Rarely, masturbation can cause skin redness of the external genital organ and microscopic hematuria may be develped for a short time.

In puberty, it is common to actively masturbate as much as 25 to 40% of adolescent girls masturbate, and 45 to 90% of adolescent boys.

Most adolescent children actively masturbate frequently to relieve their sexual desires from sexual impulses.

Some children sometimes misunderstand worry that parents or adults regard it as a bad thing to masturbate and that they prevent masturbation at all.

When sometimes grandparents or parents touch properly without thinking about their children’s external genital organ, at that time children feel good.

After that, the child can sometimes masturbate himself.

For reference, improperly touching the external genital organ of a child who is other than my child, It may be considered child abuse.

In particular, adolescent children can relieve their sexual impulses through masturbation and relieve tension arising from sexual impulses.

Masturbation is normal when the child is alone, just before going to bed, or in other cases when sexual impulses arise.

Regardless of age, it can be unusual when children masturbate in a public place, masturbate too often, repeat frequently, or masturbate impulsively.

In this case, in the pediatric clinics, doctors try to find whether there is any disease, mental or emotional abnormality, whether the mother and father’s marriage is smooth, and sometimes the doctor may undergo a psychological evaluation, and give appropriate treatment. However, I have not yet seen a child who masturbates enough to require such treatment.

Sometimes the external genitalia organ such as the vulva can be itchy because of too much masturbation or to have urinary tract system abnormality or constipation.

For this reason, infants and toddlers should not be regarded as blindly masturbating if they frequently touch or scratch the external genital organ.

When one or two-year-old infants do not know that it is inappropriate to masturbate in front of another person, parents may ignore the behavior or move them to another place and have them play there to indirectly prevent masturbation.

As parents spend a lot of time with their young infants and toddlers, they give a lot of love for eye contact, physical contact, and a lot of focused attention love.

Solving problems at home and making the marital life smooth can reduce the frequency of masturbation among infants and young children.

They usually have fun with their peers and friends and do a lot of age-appropriate physical contact exercise.

It is said that children who grow up in families with a lot of family conflict can masturbate more than usual, and some children masturbate as a means to anger ventilation toward their parents, and as a means of expressing anger.

Children who are anxious and worried are more likely to masturbate.

Even when you have severe emotional or neuropsychiatric problems, children can masturbate abnormally.

If you believe that children are doing more masturbation than usual, or if you want to obtain more information, you may need to be evaluated for growth and development at the pediatric clinics, undergo a checkup, and be treated with the help of pediatricians, psychiatrist, clinical psychologist, or neurologist as needed.

However, I have never seen a child or adolescent who needs such treatment for abnormal masturbation.

The following is an example of a question-and-answer on health counseling for children and adolescents on the Internet about “masturbation of 4 years old and opposition parties”.

Q&A. Masturbation of 4 years old

Q. Hello?

My child is a 4-year-old girl.

A few months ago, there are dolls that are as big as his body size is, and he lays it down and rubs his genitals against the doll which he puts between his legs.

At first, I was told not to be too surprised, but the groom just told me to leave it naturally, so I pretended not to know, but I don’t think I should just let it go.

Sometimes the cheeks turn red.

Yesterday I hid the doll. Please give me an answer on how to deal with it.

A. parents

Hello. Thanks for asking a good question.

The more detailed information I have, such as your child’s age, gender, past medical history, family medical history, medical examination findings, and clinical examination, the better I can give you, but I will respond based on the information you provided.

It seems to be masturbating.

As you may know, infants, toddlers, and school-age children can masturbate.

It is normal to masturbate.

Some children masturbate in public places or in front of their parents. Some young children may not know that masturbating in front of others is shameful and inappropriate. In the future, children will masturbate that way and naturally will not do it anymore when the time comes. When he masturbates that way until he quits on his own, you can either pretend to be ignored or move him where your children will not see.

However, it is not appropriate to forcibly take her away or hide his dolls, etc., which the child liked to play with by masturbating.

It is also inappropriate to tell the child that playing like that is bad or to say that it is bad to masturbate and forcibly stop playing like that.

Because he don’t think it’s bad for them to behave that way.

If you spend a lot of time playing with your child, truly loving and unconditionally, playing in that way can be reduced or no longer.

If he continue severely and you are worried, please consult with the pediatrician for a medical examination and the problem.

If you have more questions, please contact me again. Thank you.

Lee Sang-won, MD., FAAP