41. Guilty Feelings, Jealous, Manipulation, Bullying in the adolescent society
In order to understand adolescent children well and to help them well, it is necessary to understand the social background of the adolescent children in which they live.
To do this, you need to know how adolescent children’s society works.
The society of adolescents is in some ways similar to the society of the chickens.
Each adolescent child is, directly and indirectly, related to each other in adolescent society.
Chicken society is ranked according to how strong, popular, or well accepted in the chicken world.
The rank of adolescent children’s society is usually determined by the physical strength, popularity, and capacity of each adolescent child.
In other words, the ranks in the adolescent society are determined by how well they exercise, how strong their fists are, how popular they are, and how well they can be accepted and welcomed by other adolescent children.
In adolescent children’s society, adolescent children’s interactions are interconnected like a delusional organization.
In order for my adolescent children to grow and develop as members of adolescent society with sound self-respect, it is important to find out where my adolescent child belongs in the delusional organization of the adolescent society.
In most cases, some of the problems adolescents fear and suffering are related to the problems of other adolescent children in the adolescent society and to their peers.
Most of the problems associated with peers in the delusional organization of adolescent children are usually related to either one of jealousy, guilt, anger, or depression, or more.
So you need to find out if your adolescent has any problems related to jealousy, guilt, manipulation, anger, or depression.
Feelings of guilt and jealousy naturally arise in adolescents’ social relationships with their peers.
The guilt or jealousy of adolescent children often causes various problems in the society of adolescent children.
When an adolescent child enters into a relationship with his peers, he can control his peers after he or she unconsciously or consciously develop guilt or jealousy.
So, the adolescent child has a feeling of guilt or jealousy in his or her heart, and he or she uses guilt or jealousy to control his or her peers.
Still, they may not even realize that they are guilty or jealous. Also, guilt or jealousy causes a lot of mental pain. Even those ages who live in confusion don’t even know why such confusion is occurring.
If, for example, a child’s problem is related to his or her peers or friends who are lower in the ranks of the adolescent society, the adolescent child may feel guilty.
When the adolescent child’s problems are related to his or her peers or friends who are higher in rank than him or her in their adolescent society, it is common for the adolescent to become jealous.
In the society of adolescent children, when problems related to understanding, problems related to rank, or conflict arise, jealousy will arise for peers or friends at the lower ranks, and guilt is usually aroused to peers or friends at the upper ranks.
You need to know where your adolescent children are in the ranks in the delusional organization of adolescent children’s society, and what kind of conflict, guilt, jealousy, envy, etc., and to what extent they are suffering from mental pain.
This can help your adolescent more effectively. In addition, it is necessary to find out how adolescent children cope with conflicts caused by incidents related to their peers in adolescent society and how much guilt or jealousy arises.
In order not to suffer from guilt and/or jealousy in adolescent society, explaining the following situations to adolescent children and educating them about the mechanisms by which guilt and jealousy arise will help adolescents in many ways to better solve the problems they face in their society.
You need to be able to understand exactly what is happening to your adolescent children in the adolescent delusion and why.
You need to help your adolescent child’s judgment for whether what he or she did was right or not.
Teach your adolescent children how to cope with other situations that are similar to those adolescent children have experienced.
If your adolescent is feeling guilty for a problem with other adolescent children, you should teach them to make sure that they are guilty about what they are feeling.
It is taught that guilt can be caused by the wrongdoing of adolescent children themselves and that it can also be caused by jealousy of other adolescent children.
If you are sure that your adolescent’s problem was not caused by the your child’s fault and that it was due to the jealousy of other adolescent children, explain that fact.
If your adolescent child is jealous of another adolescent, but you don’t know if the child is jealous, it is helpful to teach that adolescent child that there is jealousy in the heart of the adolescent and explain and understand the reason for the jealousy.
If your adolescent child has jealousy, but there is no real reason to be jealous, you need to understand it so that you don’t get jealous.
If they have real grounds for jealousy, you should teach them how to no longer be jealous.
Parents should be in a position to be able to help at any time in adolescent society to properly deal with the various issues of envy and jealousy.
For example, my daughter Ji-ni graduated from middle school as a valedictorian.
At that time, Ji-ni’s friends said, “I sincerely congratulate you on graduating as valedictorian.
He said he was very proud of being her friend.”
One day after that, Ji-ni was in an embarrassing position. When she learned the reason in detail, one or two of her friends who were quite jealous were making Jin-i feel guilty and adjusting her.
“Hey, look at that pretty Chinky!
I think Ji-ni is the best because she is smart.
Your brother and dad gave you daily tutoring at home, so you won first place.
It seems that she knows that she is the best in the world.” He shouted out to Ji -ni and made her feel guilty.
In that situation, Ji-ni was obsessed with the miserable mood common to adolescent children. Ji-ni couldn’t solve the problem herself. And Ji-ni was even being bullied.
I explained, “You studied hard to get the first place, you weren’t a bad child, you didn’t do bad things, there’s no basis for guilt, and it’s a job that’s been adjusted to make you feel guilty because you’ve been conspiring.”
Ji-ni’s mother helped Ji-ni with all her power in explaining why Ji-ni became guilty.
The jealousy and guilt that Ji-ni experienced is a common example of adolescent children’s society.
Be a parent who understands that your adolescent child may be guilty or jealous.
Make sure your peers know that they can feel guilty or jealous. So you have to help them to grow up normally, mentally, and emotionally.
If you help your adolescent learn how to properly handle conflicts and problems caused by jealousy or guilt, his mental and emotional health will be very good.
If adolescent children fail to properly deal with the conflict and mental pain caused by guilt or jealousy, they are likely to be negatively manipulated by guilt or jealousy.